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It wasn't like Gojyo hadn't thought about these things before. Hell, his mind practically revolved around sex, so of course he'd thought about the preferences of his companions. A lot. And sometimes pictured a few things -- but he wasn't going to ever admit to that, even with Sanzo's gun pressed to his forehead.
But yes, he'd thought about it. Gojyo had theories about his traveling companions. For instance, he was positive that Sanzo was a flamer. Homo through and through. One of those Buddhist things that came from being stuck in a monastery full of men all his life, he was sure. It wasn't any one thing that told Gojyo this, just a combination of prissiness, his complete disdain for breasts, and the way Gojyo swore he'd caught him eyeing a certain simian ass a few times. Then again, Gojyo occasionally thought him to be asexual since he showed little interest in anyone at all… eternal virgin that he was. He couldn't figure how anyone could be as angry as the monk if they weren't sexually frustrated, though. It was the only explanation.
Hakkai was a lot like Gojyo himself, he thought, with a few key differences. Whereas Gojyo wasn't picky on what was under the hood so long as the packaging was pretty, he was sure Hakkai looked for a kind heart or a good personality or some other girly crap like that. He seemed the type. But then, really, with Hakkai's past he wasn't exactly raring for anything, so maybe it wasn't totally accurate. But he bet the feelings were there, regardless of actions or lack thereof.
Goku had been harder at first, but in actuality had been the easiest of them all to figure out. Once upon a time, Gojyo had been sure that the brat was just a perpetual child for whom sex was not even a consideration. He'd watched the months pile up and watched the monkey's (lack of) reactions to buxom, beautiful ladies, tall, graceful men, and everything in between. Nothing. Nada. But he'd woken from a nap one day in Jeep, bleary eyes focusing on his back-seat companion only to have an epiphany. The monkey couldn't be classified as homo, hetero, or bi at all, because he had no room in his mind for anyone beyond Sanzo. Goku refused to even notice another living being if Sanzo wasn't paying enough attention to catch him staring. Therefore, Gojyo had labeled Goku simply as Sanzo-sexual. Though, well, he still wasn't sure if sex had really entered the equation for the boy yet. It was a weird thought, and it made Gojyo scrunch up his nose when the inevitable images sprung to his mind's eye. More than likely, it was still in 'crush' territory where thoughts were all butterflies and flowers.
Gojyo broke his musing to whistle at a passing ruby lipped brunette, winking at her blushing face. The girl, like so many others, became almost instantly coy and blushed, though she still made sure to disappear rather quickly.
This wasn't a problem for Gojyo, though.
His eyes slid to his left where Hakkai was walking alongside him, a placid smile on his lips and his emerald eyes glancing at him from their corners. Gojyo honestly couldn't help his next move and did what any sane man would do in close proximity to such a pretty face - he pinched the healer on the rear.
Hakkai stopped walking, causing the others to stop as well, and gaped at his best friend of nearly half a decade.
Gojyo just grinned and tossed him the same wink he had given the girl minutes previous.
Though Sanzo was looking for all the world as if he was not even a part of their group (obviously a purposeful move on his part), Goku was never known to hold his tongue. "Wha?" the youngest of the four gasped. "Keep your pervy mitts off Hakkai, kappa!"
Gojyo rolled his eyes and turned to begin walking again. "He's your mommie, you're not his, chibi-chan."
"Hakkai can do way better than you, stupid cockroach, and I thought you liked girls anyway?"
The redhead shook his head as he walked. "It's about the person, stupid; nobody could resist a face or backside as cute as 'Kai's."
Hakkai stopped again and opened his mouth to retort, but he was obviously not allowed in this conversation, as Gojyo cut him off with a finger to his lips. He pursed his lips in agitation but listened to Goku's response anyway.
"Huh?" The monkey scrunched up his nose before turning, hand on his hip as he raked his eyes up Hakkai from top to bottom with a scrutinizing stare. It wasn't an innocent, confused look. This was the kind of stare people claimed felt like it undressed them. Sanzo and Hakkai's faces in response to this would have been hilarious if Gojyo didn't know his own looked about the same. He couldn't pick his jaw up at the moment. Ignoring their frozen states as he finished his perusal, Goku shrugged languidly and scoffed at Gojyo. His grin was mischievous and just a little wicked, something Gojyo had never seen from him before.
He flicked his eyes over Sanzo in much the same way he had Hakkai, though slower and with a long lick of his lips as his grin fell into a smirk. "Nobody could resist, huh? I could. Sanzo's way prettier."
And with that, Goku turned and continued for the inn, leaving three sputtering men behind him.
Gojyo finally broke out of his shock and laughed out loud long enough to bring himself to tears.
Sanzo-sexual, indeed.
