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Agnes was scared.
Abby had been hurt badly on a bust, and it wasn’t looking good. The other Ghostbusters were sitting with her in the private hospital waiting room.
Agnes hadn’t been there when it happened. She had slept over a friends house and had no idea that Abby had been hurt so badly, even though she had woken up startled and in a cold sweat in the middle of the night and didn’t know why.
She looked at her mother’s colleagues and friends. They all looked scared. Patty kept pacing, Holtz kept fidgeting in her chair and Erin just stared straight ahead.
Agnes just wanted Abby. She wanted to go back to yesterday morning when Abby had frustratingly burned their waffles, and she had teasingly wrapped her arms around her from behind and told her she sucked at cooking, so why bother?
She wanted to go back to the night before that, when she had fallen asleep with her head on Abby’s lap while watching a movie. The feeling of Abby’s fingers playing with her hair.
She wished she hadn’t had a sleepover. She had been reluctant to go, as she hadn’t spent a night apart from Abby since the day she was hurt saving her from that ghost, but Abby had insisted.
She loved that Agnes made friends at school. She just wanted Agnes to be happy, she said, and kids should have friends and have sleepovers.
But Abby is who made her happy. They were joined at the hip and while Agnes did have friends at school, she had waited her whole life for someone like Abby and she wouldn’t take her for granted.
“Are you the family of Abby Yates?”
All four of them stand up. Agnes comes forward. “I’m her daughter. Is she okay? Can I see her?”
She needed to see her.
The doctor sighs and scratches her head. Agnes can feel her mouth go dry as she feels Erin put her arm around her for support. She sighs, her eyes filling with tears. “Is she okay? Please. Tell me!”
She knew that if Abby didn’t survive, she wouldn’t either.
The doctor sighs again. “Ms. Yates has a traumatic brain injury which has resulted in some swelling. We had to induce a coma so her body can hopefully heal itself, and for the brain swelling to go down.”
No. No no no no no. She couldn’t be hurt that badly. Abby was stronger than anyone Agnes knew. She shook her head. “She…. She will wake up…right?”
The thought of Abby never making her a burnt waffle again, or never again feeling her fingers playing with her hair, made Agnes sick to her stomach.
The doctor speaks again. “We don’t know. We will be monitoring her vitals and in time hopefully, she will wake up.”
Agnes wipes her face of the tears she didn’t realize had fallen. “I want to see her. Please? She needs me.”
The doctor nods and motions for Agnes to follow her, and Erin squeezes her hand before she does just that.
She turns three corners and the doctor stops in front of one of the rooms. She looks at Agnes, a serious look on her face. “Your mother isn’t going to look how she normally does, okay? She’s got a lot of bruising on her face. We don’t know if she can hear you, but we always encourage family members to talk to our patients when they are in an induced coma.”
Agnes nods. “Okay. So I can stay with her? I don’t want to leave her here alone.”
The doctor sighs. “In the ICU we do have strict visiting hours but as she is your mother and she is in a coma, we can extend these hours for you daily.”
Agnes sighs in relief, but the nervous, sick feeling in her stomach only doubles when the doctor opens the door for her and she slowly walks into the room.
The doctor leaves and closes the door behind her, and Agnes steps forward and takes in the unconscious form of Abby, who doesn’t look a thing like herself.
She IS bruised, badly. There’s a tube in her mouth and there are machines beeping all around her, a slow, steady rhythm to them. She knows that the machines mean that Abby is still alive, but all she can see when she closes her eyes is Abby’s smiling face that first day at the orphanage, and she would give anything to
replace the machines with the Abby she had fallen for that day.
She drags the chair that was in the corner of the room as close to Abby’s bed as she could, sitting down beside her. She takes her hand. “Please don’t go. Please. You have to stay here with me. You have to come back. Please!” She starts to sob. “I can’t….I need you to wake up. Abby, please. I can’t be strong. Not if you’re like this. Not if you don’t wake up. Please…don’t leave me here. Please…”
She is begging her, pleading. She feels like she might hyperventilate, but she manages to calm her breathing. She leans forward and rests her head next to Abby’s. “Two years isn’t enough time. We have so much to do together, you and me.” She swallows as she feels her tears fall on Abby’s pillow. “I would have stopped it. If I was there I would have stopped it. But I was at a stupid sleepover when I should have been with you.”
She drapes her arm over Abby, and her heart shatters when she realizes that Abby can’t put her arms around her in return. All of the love she had felt for anyone was lying in her arms, and she didn’t know how to make her better.
It took 5 long, agonizing days for Abby to wake up. Agnes was sleeping, her hand in Abby’s and her head resting to the side of the uncomfortable chair. Abby’s eyes flutter open and she focuses on Agnes. Her eyes dart around the room and she realizes quickly that she’s in the hospital. She manages to squeeze Agnes’ hand, caressing the back of it with her thumb.
Agnes stirs and her eyes flutter open at the familiar feeling of Abby’s hand squeezing hers.
She blinks her eyes and rubs them, and looks down at Abby. When she sees that her eyes are open and that she’s focusing on her, she jumps up. “Oh God, you’re awake!”
Abby tries to speak but finds her mouth and throat too dry to do so. The ventilator has been successfully taken off the day before, so she could open her mouth, but no sound was coming out.
Agnes reaches over and presses on the call button for the nurse. She tells them that she’s awake and to come in right away. She looks down at Abby and leans in closer. “It’s okay. Don’t try to talk. The doctor should be in any minute, okay?”
Abby nods. She reaches up and touches Agnes’ face. She can’t remember what happened exactly but she can see from the worried, exhausted look on her daughters face that it was probably very scary and serious.
Agnes sniffles and holds onto Abby’s hand. “You’re gonna be okay. I knew you would come back.”
Abby narrowed her eyes in concern. Had she almost died? Agnes must have been so scared. She wanted so badly to sit up and hold her and comfort her, but she felt so heavy and tired.
Agnes seems to sense her internal struggle. “I’m okay. Really. Now that you’re awake….
everything is okay now.”
She didn’t look okay. She looked drained, and so unlike her bright, beautiful self that it scared Abby. She needed to know what had happened.
If only everything didn’t feel so fuzzy.
Suddenly the doctor comes in and they start examining her. She looks over and sees Agnes backing away to let them work. She still looked so scared.
After a few minutes, Abby had begun to find her voice. She asks what had happened, how long she has been there for, and the doctor goes into a long explanation of what had conspired over the last few days.
“How long have I been unconscious?”
The doctor frowns. “5 days.”
Abby’s eyes widen as the nurse starts to fluff her pillows and incline the bed. “What happened?”
“You had a traumatic brain injury and we needed to induce a coma as a result. You will remain here for observation for a few days as we need to check on your neurological functions.”
Abby swallows hard. “I feel fuzzy and tired.”
“That’s normal, Ms. Yates. You haven’t moved for over 5 days, it will take some time to begin to feel more like yourself again. We need to check on your speech, motor functions and memory. Please let us know if you have pains in your head or spine. Over the next few days we will have specialists come in to check on all
Of this. For now, we need you to rest.”
Agnes steps forward. “I can still stay with her though, right?”
The doctor smiles sympathetically at her. “Of course. I wouldn’t dream of keeping you away.”
Abby sees Agnes practically slump in relief out of the corner of her eye. She feels an overwhelming wave of guilt come over her. She wants the doctor and the nurse to leave so she can talk to her girl.
They tell her she can start to drink liquids a little at a time and in an hour or two they will bring in a protein supplement for her to try in a few hours. They check to make sure she is still hooked up correctly for her vitals and then they leave the room.
Abby looks over at Agnes and pats the side of her bed, motioning for her to join her.
Agnes shakes her head. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
Abby frowns. “You could never hurt me. Come here, honey. Please.”
Agnes reluctantly moves forward and climbs into the bed with her. Abby reaches up and wraps her arm around her, pulling her in close to her.
Within a minute or so, Abby’s heart breaks when she feels Agnes burrow her face into her shoulder, and her arm coming up to wrap herself fully around her. And then she starts to cry. Her body is shaking with sobs, and Abby kisses the top of her head. “Shhhh…..I’m right here.”
“I thought I’d lost you. I thought….” She holds Abby even closer to her.
“I’m so sorry. Oh god honey… I’m so sorry.”
“I don’t want to let go. I’m scared….what if you close your eyes and you don’t wake up again?”
“I’ll be okay. I wouldn’t leave you.”
“But you did. You were gone for 5 days and….they didn’t know if you’d wake up.”
“Shhh….honey. You’re exhausted and I know you haven’t been sleeping. I can see it in your eyes. I’m supposed to rest and I want you to close your eyes and rest with me, okay?”
Agnes nods. “Promise me you’ll be okay?”
“I promise.”
“I love you so much. If I had been there I would have stopped it. I wouldn’t let anything hurt you.”
“Don’t be sorry. You were having fun with your friends. You deserve to have fun with your friends.”
“But what if you didn’t wake up? I can’t do any of this without you. I have friends but I should have been with you.”
Abby sighs. “I love you, too. You know I… when it was coming towards me all I could think about was you?”
Her memories were fuzzy, but she could remember that clearly. She thought of Agnes and how she needed to survive for her.
Agnes reaches over and links her fingers within hers. “Two years isn’t enough time for us. I just found you and I don’t want to lose you. Not again. Those few weeks without you were hard, but for you to leave me here without you forever? I’m not ready.”
“Me either.”
They lie there like that for a few minutes, and eventually they fall asleep. A few hours later, a nurse comes in to wake up Abby for her to start in on her supplements, but Abby motions with her mouth and index finger to not make a lot of noise so Agnes can still sleep.
Abby manages to sit up a bit without disturbing her, and she manages to sip her water and liquid supplements while Agnes catches up on her sleep.
Within a few minutes she notices Agnes is beginning to stir. She reaches up and plays with her hair, trying to calm her.
Suddenly Agnes sits up quickly. “No. NO! Abby!”
She bursts into tears when she opens her eyes. She’s shaking. Abby reaches up and pulls her down close to her, and Agnes sobs into her neck. “You were gone….. you died…. You left me…..”
“No. No I didn’t. I’m here. I’m right here. I never left you. I love you so much.”
She feels Agnes bring her arm up to wrap around her. She just listens to her sobs and runs her hand down her arm in a comforting motion. Agnes was clearly traumatized, and Abby didn’t know how to help her except to hold her and let her know that she was not going anywhere.
Agnes couldn’t stop crying. She didn’t want to let Abby go. She was afraid if she did, she would disappear. She just wanted to go home. She wanted to rewind the last week and stop Abby from going on that bust and stop herself from going to her sleepover.
She wanted so many things.
————————————————————
They had been home for three days, but Agnes’ nightmares never wavered. She would wake up from them in a cold sweat, and run to Abby’s room to check on her, to make sure she was still there, that she was still breathing.
She could never fall asleep afterwards. And the lack of sleep was really taking a toll.
It was on the 4th day that Erin showed up. She brought them groceries and much to Abby’s delight, some paperwork.
Agnes just watched them, laughing and talking and carrying on, worried that Abby was doing too much, too soon. She bit her lip as Abby started to talk about a theory and what Holtz was working on back at the lab, and frowns when she hears Erin have to repeat herself more than once. The doctor had told them at Abby’s short term memory had been affected by her injury, and Agnes had an irrational fear that it would get worse somehow, and that Abby would start to forget more things, and eventually maybe even forget her.
What would happen if Abby forgot her? Would she even want her around? Would she have to be sent away? Agnes knew she would continue to love her no matter what, and she knew she needed to stop thinking these horrible things but, she couldn’t help it. Abby had found her, and brought love and safety into her life. She was always afraid that someday she would be ripped away from her somehow.
She didn’t want Abby to go back into the field, even if or when she got better. She knew that Abby loved it, but she was so scared of losing her. She needed her to stay home. She needed to keep her safe.
Abby suddenly announces that shes tired and needs to lie down for a nap. She does this sometimes, and she goes to Agnes to wrap her arms around her and reassure her that she’s fine, that she just needs to rest. Agnes holds onto her for dear life, resting her head on her shoulder. “Okay, Mom. I’ll wake you in an hour?”
Much to Abby’s delight, Agnes had started calling her “Mom”. She nods and kisses the side of her head. “Sounds good.”
She watches as Abby heads upstairs to her room, and when she hears the door close behind her, she bursts into tears.
Erin is there, wrapping her in her arms. “Hey… Agnes…. What’s wrong?”
Agnes shakes her head. “She doesn’t remember things…. Things she knew so well…. Equations and ghost sightings…. What if she…. What if she forgets…. Me?”
Erin shakes her head. “You? Agnes…. Abby would never forget you!”
“But she can’t help it! I can’t….I’m so scared. I almost lost her. I came so close. She’s all I have in the world. If she tries to go back out into the field I won’t be there to keep her safe…”
Erin nods and pulls back. “Abby is strong,
Agnes. She will pull through all of this. She has a head injury and they are no joke. I come here to help her keep her mind off of it, and also to keep an eye on you.”
Agnes narrows her eyebrows in confusion. “Me? Why me?”
“Honey… you don’t sleep much, do you?”
Agnes gasps and puts her head down. She gently shakes her head.
“Nightmares?”
Agnes looks up at her and nods, wiping away the fresh tears in her cheeks. “I wake up and I….I check on her. Just to make sure she’s alive. That she’s still here with me.”
Erin places her hands on her shoulders. “She is. She isn’t going anywhere.”
“But she could. She almost did! She wouldn’t wake up, Erin. I talked to her everyday. I stroked her hair and her cheeks, and I begged her. Begged her not to leave me. It was horrible. I would have gladly gone back to the orphanage forever if it only meant she came back. Because at least she would still be here.”
Erin hugs her again. “Honey… does Abby know about this? About your nightmares? She wouldn’t want you to not be able to sleep. Have you talked to her about what happened, what you went through during those 5 days?”
“I can’t. She doesn’t need to worry about me on top of everything. I’ll be fine as long as she’s okay.”
Erin sighs. “Okay. Listen…. I’ll talk to her about not going back into the field, all right?”
“You will?”
Erin pulls back and nods. “I will. I can’t promise it’ll work. We know how stubborn Abby can be but if anyone can talk her out of or into something it’s me.”
Agnes sighs in relief. “Thank you. I just need her to slow down. I need her to be safe.”
Erin nods. “I know. Don’t worry… I’ll try my best.”
The next time Erin comes over, Agnes is upstairs asleep. Erin is slightly relieved to see this was the case, especially after their long conversation the other day.
Much to Abby’s delight, she brought her wonton soup, and for once, the ratio of wonton to broth was perfect. As they settle in on the sofa to dig into the Chinese takeout, Erin asks Abby if Agnes is okay.
Abby shrugs, blowing on her soup before taking a bite. “She seems tired lately. I put her to sleep about an hour ago. Poor thing could barely keep her eyes open. She insisted she didn’t need a nap, but I put my foot down this time.”
Erin clears her throat as she picks at her Lo mein noodles, avoiding eye contact. “I noticed she seemed tired when I came over the other day, too.”
Abby nods. “Well…. I don’t think she sleeps well at night and every time I try to talk to her about it she brushes it aside. To tell you the truth, I’m getting a little worried.”
Erin takes a bite of her noodles and chews, then swallows, before doing the same thing again. Abby watches her and narrows her eyes. “Erin… is there something you’re not telling me? Or something you WANT to tell me?”
Erin places the container of noodles in front of her on the coffee table and wipes her mouth with a napkin. “Well…. Actually…. Yes.”
Abby raises her eyebrows, intrigued. “Okay?”
“I talked to Agnes when you went upstairs for your nap the other day. She asked me to talk to you about something and I promised her I would.”
“What is it?”
“She’s scared that something will happen to you and she doesn’t want you to go back into the field when the time comes. And I gotta say, I agree with her.”
Abby places her soup down on the coffee table, her appetite gone. “Wait…. what?”
“Abby, you almost died. It scared her.”
“I know that. I’m not stupid. I know it scared her but I’m not going to stop working because of one freak accident. It’s not like I’m going back now. It will be a few weeks before I’m cleared for that. And when that time comes, I’ll talk to Agnes about it and explain that I’m not giving up on something that I worked my entire life on because of one near death experience.”
Erin sighs in frustration. “Abby. You know…. You can be kind of selfish sometimes!”
Abby’s mouth drops open. “Excuse me?”
Erin bites her lip. Maybe she was going too far. She takes a deep breath and decides to just plow onward with what was on her mind. “Abby…Agnes hasn’t been sleeping at night. You’re right about that. You know why? Because she has nightmares. She has nightmares and every time she wakes up from them she rushes to your room just to make sure you are still alive.”
This sobers Abby up. “What? She told you this?”
Erin nods. “She’s scared, Abby.”
Abby shakes her head and takes off her glasses for a moment, wiping her eyes and pinching the bridge of her nose. She looks back at Erin. “Why didn’t she tell me?”
Erin sighs. “She didn’t want you to worry. She just needs you to get better.” She bites her lip again. “She told me more, and I probably shouldn’t be telling you all that she told me, but I think you need to know.”
“Well, please tell me. I need to know what she told you.”
“She said that when you were in the coma, she begged you to come back to her, and she was bargaining with anyone who would listen that if
you woke up, she would go back to the orphanage if she had to, because at least you would still be here.”
Abby shakes her head. “She’ll never have to go back there. Over my dead body!”
Erin winces at Abby’s choice of words, but she continues. “She’s worried that your memory loss might get worse, and that somehow you will forget her.”
“I could NEVER forget her!” Not Agnes. She could forget so many things but, not her. She is what lit up Abby’s whole world.
Erin gets up and moves to sit beside her on the sofa. She takes Abby’s hand. “This isn’t about you giving up on your dream job, Abby. Agnes is falling apart and she needs you.”
Abby nods, swallowing hard, her eyes filling with tears. “Well I’m not going anywhere. I would never leave her behind. She knows that. I’d…. somehow remember her even if I didn’t. I know that doesn’t make much sense but I know it to be true.”
Erin nods and wraps her arm around her, and Abby rests her head on her shoulder. “You scared all us, Abbs. But no one as much as Agnes. She ummm….” Erin takes a deep breath, her eyes filling with tears of her own. “She told me she would play with your hair, and stroke your cheeks, and just watch you breathe. For five days, Abby. She thought that you weren’t going to come back to her.”
Abby bursts into tears and shakes her head. “I’d never leave her. I would have found my way back somehow. I’d never leave her,
Erin….”
“I know. She knows that too, but you were hurt, and you couldn’t help what was happening. She knows you would never leave her on purpose, but she can’t handle something else taking you away, either.”
Abby takes a deep breath and nods. “Okay. I won’t go back into the field. At least not for awhile. I can’t promise that I won’t ever go back but…”
Erin pulls back and smiles. “That’s all she needs from you right now, Abby.”
“I feel terrible that she felt like she couldn’t talk to me. I’m her mother. She should be able to come to me about anything. She’s been hurting and keeping it from me.” She shakes her head. “Maybe I’m not good enough, Erin. Maybe I’m not what she needs. I feel like our whole relationship has been nothing but one mess after another.”
“Abby…. What are you talking about?”
Abby shrugs. “When we first met, she was taken away before I had a chance to stop it. After the adoption I couldn’t get her into the prep school in Brooklyn, even though I am an alumni there. Then, whenever she had a game or a performance, I managed to miss it because we had a bust, or I had to work late. And now this. I put her through a lot, Erin.”
Erin shakes her head. “Abby…Agnes adores you. She couldn’t care less about the school she goes to, and she understands that you would rather be with her at a game than on a bust sometimes. You do everything you can for her. She knows that. The only reason why she hasn’t talked to you about all of this is because she thinks it will somehow delay your recovery.”
Abby takes a deep breath and nods. “Okay. Well…. When she wakes up we are going to have to have a long chat. She can’t keep going on like this.”
Erin hugs her again. “You gonna be okay?”
“Yea. Thanks, Erin. I’m glad that Agnes could talk to you. You’ve been our rock through all of this.”
Erin shrugs. “You’re my best friend, Abbs. And Agnes is an extension of you, now.”
“Yea. She is. I don’t know what I would do without her.” She sighs. “Or you.”
Erin blushes. “Back at ya. You guys going to be okay?”
“Yea. We will be okay. Now that I know what’s going on with her….we can talk and maybe try to move on from this. Maybe we can try to be happy again.”
Erin frowns. “You always make her happy, Abby.”
Abby shrugs. “Not when she’s waking up from nightmares every night I’m not.” She puts her hand up when Erin starts to protest. “It’s okay. I’m gonna fix this.”
Erin nods. “Of course you will. You’re Abby Yates.”
Abby smiles, and Erin gets up, wanting to leave the mother and daughter alone for awhile. “Call me if you need me?”
Abby nods. “I will. Thanks, Er.”
Abby walks her out and she stands there for a minute, her back pressed against the door.
She looks at her watch and sighs, then decides to clean up the kitchen a little bit, going over in her mind all that she and Erin had talked about. She feels guilt settle into her bones. Agnes was only 15 years old. She shouldn’t feel like she has to hold her together. That was supposed to be HER job.
She did get mild headaches still, and her short term memory was starting to turn around, although she knew it could be better. But to think that one of Agnes’ worries was that she could somehow forget her, really shook Abby to her core.
She knew in her heart of hearts that could never happen, because it would be too cruel. To find her and then have her suddenly no longer exist in Abby’s memory, was too much to even think about. She would never hurt Agnes like that. She couldn’t.
She wipes her eyes. She had been crying and didn’t realize it. The truth was, there wasn’t a moment she spent with Agnes that she could forget. She remembers everything. She puts down the dirty rag she was holding and heads upstairs to check on Agnes. She just needs to check on her and make sure she’s okay.
She goes into Agnes’ room and sighs in relief when she sees that she’s still sound asleep. She looks around in her room and sighs. Agnes was a very neat person. Way neater than she was at her age or even now. Agnes had told her it was because the orphanage was very strict about it, and since she lived there for about 6 years she had gotten pretty good at being neat.
Agnes’ parents were killed in a car accident when she was six. She vaguely remembered them. She had one photo of them, which she kept on her bedside table, next to the photos of all of them together, and the one of just she and Abby. She picks up the photo and gently rubs her fingertips over it. She looks down at Agnes, and she bends down to kiss her forehead. “Everything will be okay. I promise.”
Abby pulls the covers up to her neck and sits and watches her for a few minutes. She tries to imagine how Agnes must have felt, for five days not knowing if she would wake up. She sighs. She knew that she and Agnes had so much to talk about when she woke up.
She decides to head downstairs and order Agnes her favorite takeout, and some wonton soup for herself. She figures that Agnes will be hungry when she wakes up.
It’s about an hour later when she looks up from her reading to see Agnes entering the room, her bathrobe tied around her. She smiles. “Hey, sleepyhead.”
Agnes blushes and tucks her hands into her pockets. “I’m sorry I slept so late! It’s dark out!”
Abby shrugs and pats the empty spot next to her on the sofa. Agnes comes to sit beside her and she snuggles into Abby’s side when she puts her arm around her. “You hungry? I ordered your favorite from that Taco place you like so much.”
Agnes nods. “A little bit. But I’m cold. I was nice and warm in my bed.”
Abby kisses the top of her head and chuckles. “Okay. Let’s sit here for a few minutes then. I’ll keep you warm, okay?”
Agnes nods. “K. What time did Aunt Erin leave?”
“A couple hours ago.”
Agnes frowns, and sits up to look at Abby. “Why didn’t you wake me up?”
“You needed the sleep. It’s fine. I’m a big girl, you know.”
Agnes is silent at that. She sighs and settles herself against Abby again. She bites her lip when she feels her eyes filling with tears. What if she had a bad headache and fell and she had been asleep? What if she woke up and Abby had forgotten her? She shakes her head and reaches down to grab Abby’s hand. It was
warm, and comforting, and alive.
Abby squeezes her hand in return. “You know I….I’ll never leave you okay? I promise you. I won’t leave you for a long, long time. When I’m old and gray and you have grown up and maybe have a family of your own, maybe children of your own. I won’t leave you. It’s always going to be me and you. Always.”
“You can’t promise that. You can’t….I need to keep you safe. I would have stopped anything or anyone from hurting you. Instead I was at a stupid sleepover. I should have been with you. You’re all thats ever mattered.”
“Oh honey…. You think I don’t feel that from you? You think I can’t feel how much you love me and want to keep me safe? I know you do.
But keeping me in your line of sight 24/7 isn’t healthy. I want you to be happy and….your lack of sleep and your nervousness…. It scares me.”
Agnes sniffles. “Is your memory getting better?”
Abby pauses. “I think so. I’ve been working on it. I think everyday it gets better.”
Agnes is quiet again, and Abby sits up more and Agnes lifts her head up from leaning on her. Abby sighs and puts her hair behind her ear. “Listen…. Your Aunt Erin and I talked tonight when you were sleeping. I don’t want you to get mad at her for talking to me, okay?”
Agnes nods, her eyes widening.
“I’m not going to forget you, okay? I still remember everything. The first time I saw you. The first time you came here. Our horrible separation, and then how you ran away and came back to me. I remember the day I adopted you, and our first trip together. All of it. Nothing is fuzzy when it comes to you. I could never forget you.”
Agnes takes a deep breath and looks up at her. “Really?”
Abby nods. “Yea. Of course. You’re everything. And I’m getting better everyday. And If you have a nightmare, I want you to come and wake me up or get into bed with me if it makes you feel better, okay? We are in this together. Always.”
Agnes nods and wraps her arms around Abby’s neck. “I love you.”
Abby holds her close and closes her eyes. “I love you so much. I’m not going to go back into the field again, okay? Not for a long time. Maybe not ever.”
“Really? You won’t?”
She pulls back to look at her, wiping her tears with her fingertips. “My work was everything that mattered to me for as long as I can remember. And then I met you. And you matter more to me than any ghost I might come across or any bust I might succeed in. Okay?”
Agnes nods, sighing in relief. She smiles. “So Aunt Erin spilled all my secrets?”
Abby smiles back. “I guess she did. Are you mad?”
“No. I guess I’m relieved. She’s a good friend, Mom.”
“She’s the best.”
Agnes bites her lip and looks towards the kitchen area. “I’m hungry. Can we eat now?”
Abby gets up off the sofa and takes her hand. “Yea. Are we okay?”
“We were always okay. I’m just happy you came back to me.”
Abby kisses the top of her head. “Me, too.”