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Seungmin rubs at the corner of his bleary eyes as he sits up awake after nearly half an hour of staring into nothing. He slings his shorts-clad legs off the bed and climbs his way down, blanket still draped and tangled over his shoulders.
It's an off day. He can afford to shower and clean up later, is what he tells himself as he brushes his teeth. He splashes cold water onto his bed-ridden face, runs his hands through the mess on top of his head, straightens his crumpled t-shirt. As usual, Hyunjin is still sound asleep on his bed when he walks out the bathroom. His other roommate, however, is nowhere to be found. Judging by the clinking of pots and utensils, he's out in the kitchen.
He stifles a yawn and pads down to the kitchen, barely making a sound. The sight that greets him warms him down to the core. His heart clenches painfully in his chest, a familiar feeling, as he sees Minho shuffle around the kitchen cooking God-knows-what. Not that he'd admit it.
He looks beautiful. The morning sun bathes the room in a warm glow, casting an angelic halo around Minho's form. All his delicate features and sharp lines, face pinched in concentration, is highlighted by the gentle light coming from outside. Seungmin is infuriated at how Minho could look so damn perfect right after waking up, irritated at how he can't tear his eyes away from him, at how his heart beats loudly in his ribs, a bit faster than normal.
"Don't look at me like that, it's creepy." Minho's chiding startles him out of his thoughts.
"Morning," he greets instead of responding, voice still rough from sleep. Minho lets out a hum of affirmation as he continues to slave over the stovetop.
Seungmin walks to the coffee machine, reaches up into the cupboard and pulls out two mugs, two capsules of coffee. The soft whirring of the machine does nothing to freshen him, instead lulling him back to dreamland. He manages to keep his eyes open, though, if only to put the mugs of coffee down on the counter top after sipping from his own, and drape himself over Minho's back like a koala.
Minho grunts at the sudden weight of an entire Kim Seungmin on his back but makes no move to jostle him out of his comfortable position. Instead, he melts at the contact. Seungmin fixes the blanket over them both and wraps his arms around the older's waist, burying his face in his hair.
"It's not my fault if you accidentally burn your blanket and set the dorm on fire," Minho deadpans, yet he fixes the blanket so it's nowhere near the source of heat.
Seungmin hums. He'd went to the company late last night, thinking he could squeeze in a few hours of practice, sleep schedule be damned. It really wasn't a good idea. He'd come back to a brightly lit but silent room, curtains over Minho's bed drawn shut, Hyunjin laughing away with the other night owls. He'd turned off the lights and fell asleep hours before Hyunjin finally came in. Unlike Hyunjin though, Seungmin doesn't possess the ability to wake up any later than 9 AM. Only now he's feeling the fatigue and soreness of his muscles.
"Brat. You stayed up late again last night," Minho accuses, but there isn't any bite to it.
Seungmin half-heartedly mumbles some sort of affirmation. No use lying to Minho, the older can see right through him. All the stumbling at late night when Seungmin returned probably woke him up, anyway. He would've noticed whether or not Seungmin told him. Minho headbutts his chin at the lack of response from the younger. Seungmin groans, "Isn't it too early for this?"
Minho says nothing, electing to focus on sipping his coffee. He buries his face on the crook of Minho's neck, inhaling the familiar scent of something floral and citrus-like. Seungmin hooks his chin on Minho's shoulder to peer at what he's doing. "What are you making?"
"Kimbap and egg rolls."
They shuffle around in the kitchen together, Seungmin still stubbornly clinging on to Minho despite all his complaints and threats. "You're so heavy," is what Minho keeps groaning on and on about, "You're gonna have to eat charred eggs for breakfast," is the constant threat, but Minho doesn't push him off and away, either.
"Move, pup," orders Minho. "I need to get the rice."
Seungmin rests his forehead on Minho's shoulder and waddles along, still refusing to let go of the furnace that is Lee Minho, syncing his steps with the other's. Minho complains and grumbles underneath his breath again, something about a dumb, spoiled puppy, and Seungmin can only chuckle against Minho's ear.
Let him have this moment for a bit longer. It's not often they get the time to do this, be like this, cling on to each other despite all the complaints, carefree without any lenses to monitor their every movement, without an upcoming schedule rushing them, without the image of a divorced couple to uphold. Slow mornings like these are rare, and Seungmin wants to indulge in it as much as he can.
When did Kim Seungmin become such a sap? He blames it all on Minho.
"Hyung," he whines to Minho's shoulder blade. He doesn't even know why he says it. Maybe he just wants the older's attention.
"What else do you want, you spoiled pup?"
Seungmin smiles against the soft cotton of Minho's shirt. "You. I want you."
That effectively shuts Minho up, though only for a short-lived moment. "Brat," is all Minho says, but the redness in the tips of his ears shows his true feelings. Seungmin smiles in victory. "You're literally crushing me right now. Get off," he whines.
Seungmin hums, teasing. "I don't see you pushing me off, though."
"I might as well shove you inside the air fryer, Kim Seungmin."
"You wouldn't." Seungmin sticks his tongue at the older when he turns back. Minho brings out the inner child in him and he doesn't, can't really care about it. "Because I'm your favorite dongsaeng."
"Wrong, Innie is."
Seungmin laughs giddily into the older's shoulder, arms wounding tighter against Minho's waist as he splutters a few more curses and insults at Seungmin. He knows the truth even without it being said. Besides, it's more fun this way. "Whatever you say, hyung."
"What are you doing today?" Seungmin asks Minho around a mouthful of eggs, about an hour later. He'd detached himself from Minho's back with much despair, washed up, now sitting across the older who's scrolling through his phone. Jeongin and Jisung's awake too, now, if the bickering coming from their room is anything to go by. The rest, however, is still completely knocked out.
"Nothing." Minho looks up at him with an eyebrow raised, a silent question on the tip of his tongue.
"Probably will go to the company later, might stop by at the convenience store to buy some things," he answers the unspoken question. He mentally lists off the things he needed to buy, shampoo, his toothpaste which Minho and Hyunjin keeps using, some packs of that jelly Felix likes so much, and also that ramen brand which Chan likes, because it isn't as spicy.
"I'll go with you."
Seungmin beams. "Sure."
"Don't be so excited, I'm tagging along because I needed to buy some things, too, not because I want to accompany you."
"Whatever, hyung."
Minho leaves then, off to their shared room. Joining him at the table moments later is Jeongin and Jisung. Gradually, the other members start to wake up, Chan and Changbin fighting over who gets to shower first, as usual. Felix shoves them both and drags his own feet towards the bathroom instead. No sounds from Hyunjin, yet.
Seungmin puts his plates down on the sink after he's done, then bothers Jeongin for a few moments before finally leaving the youngest alone. He still has a few hours to relax before he plans on going out. He has time to either read that book he's been putting off reading, rewatch last night's baseball game, or annoy Minho.
He chooses the last option. When he enters the room, the curtains over Minho's bed are half-drawn. Hyunjin is still sleeping and Seungmin feels bad about waking him up, but it's an hour before noon, so he softly shakes his shoulders.
Hyunjin grumbles, "Five more minutes, mom," but Seungmin is insistent. He curls his fingers along his sides, tickling him. "I'm awake," the older exclaims as he rubs the sleep from his eyes.
"You better be." Seungmin rolls his eyes, not unkindly. "Clean up. Hyung made kimbap and egg rolls, they're in the kitchen."
At the mention of food, Hyunjin shoots up the bed and slumps over to the bathroom. Seungmin takes his time folding his blankets and arranging his sea of pillows and plushies, then folds some of his laundry neatly. It's his and Changbin's turn to do the laundry tomorrow, he reminds himself. He waits until Hyunjin walks out the room before he slithers over to Minho, who's reading some sort of web comic.
"What do you want?" asks the older, not even lifting his gaze.
Seungmin plops down on his bed and stretches his limbs. "Can't I spend time with my favorite hyung?"
"You're taking up all the space, get off," Minho grumbles, but still he shifts to make room for Seungmin and snuggles closer to the vocalist, head against his chest. Typical of Minho. Seungmin places a hand on top of Minho's stomach and this time, small fingers lace through Seungmin's much longer ones.
They spend their time like that, Minho thumbing through his phone, Seungmin playing with their joined hands, singing random songs softly. At some point, Minho's switched to watching cute cat videos. Seungmin thinks he can fall asleep just like this, in Minho's embrace. He might as well.
But he can't help thinking, the thought suddenly hitting him like a train wreck with the warmth snuggled on his form. What is it with him and Minho?
It might seem interesting in the eyes of outsiders, their relationship. Minho looks and acts like he's not fond of Seungmin's presence, always riling him up, sometimes ignoring him, acerbic words spilling out those pretty lips every time. Seungmin isn't any different, giving in to Minho's clear attempts at riling him up. Their playful banter fills every space they set foot in. They act like they hate each other, though that couldn't be any further from the truth, a truth both of them would never admit out loud.
So, why haven't they admitted to it?
What are they? is the question dying to be asked. Maybe Seungmin will.
They've been friends for a long time, both being each other's first friends in the company, both helping each other adjust to the rough trainee life. Hell, he's gotten close with Minho even before he befriends Hyunjin. Over time, innocent hugs had turned to purposeful kisses, and the friendship they had blossomed into something more. Something unnamed. Something they avoid and ignore discussing yet indulge in at the same time.
Seungmin looks down at his hyung, only to find that the other is staring at him already. The tips of Minho's ears flush at being caught, but stubborn as he is, he doesn't avert his eyes.
"Don't look at me like that, it's creepy," Seungmin repeats Minho's words from earlier.
He glares at Seungmin. "I'm having a staring contest with you."
Seungmin nearly scoffs at Minho's childish behavior, but he gives in to it, locking his gaze with Minho's. They stay like that for a while, two childish souls in the form of adults, both too hard-headed and competitive. Up close, he can see the perfect structure of Minho's face. It irritates him, how someone could be so beautiful. Soft, kitten eyes and pretty pink lips contrasting the sharpness of his jaw, his nose, his cheekbones. Seungmin blinks and sighs. "Alright, you win."
Minho dances victoriously in their limited space. He even sticks his tongue out at Seungmin, for good measure. Seungmin huffs and tickles him just for revenge.
"Sore loser."
It's Seungmin's turn to stick his tongue out. They fall back into their previous state of temporary truce, but Seungmin can't stop thinking. He wants to know. He's desperate to confirm his suspicions, not wanting to be kept in the dark for much longer. Yet, he's afraid, not wanting whatever unspoken deal they have to change, or worse, fizzle out and dissipate into nothing.
"You're making that face again."
"What face?"
"That ugly one you make when you're thinking. Stop doing that."
A teasing grin tugs on his cheeks. "Have you been staring at my face, hyung?"
Minho shoves against his chest. "Never mind."
Well, it's now or never. Minho will find out sooner or later, anyway, with the uncanny way in which he picks up on all of Seungmin's thoughts. He asks, heart beating loudly against his ribcage, "What are we, hyung?"
Minho tilts his head in confusion. Seungmin can tell whatever he answers with will not satisfy him. "We're Minho and Seungmin. Gagwanz. Divorced couple. Cat and puppy."
"I know that," Seungmin whines and knocks his chin down to Minho's head. "that's not what I meant."
Minho's expression soften, lips curling into a thoughtful frown. He searches Seungmin's eyes. Seungmin doesn't know, doesn't want to know what Minho finds in there. "Well, we're whatever you want us to be."
"How about boyfriends?" Seungmin ducks his head and buries it into Minho's hair, both surprised and embarrassed at his sudden confession, hiding his reddening cheeks.
No words come from Minho and Seungmin fears he might've said the wrong thing. Did he look into this wrongly? Does Minho see him only as a friend, a younger brother, and nothing more? But his fears were proven wrong as he looks down at Minho, who's trying hard to stifle his giggles, fond look on his face. Seungmin squints his eyes at him. He's embarrassed and afraid and unsure, for God's sake, and this hyung has the audacity to laugh at him. Unbelievable.
"Sure, if that's what you want."
Seungmin exhales, relieved. "Yeah, that— that sounds nice." Another thought pops into his head then, seeing the way Minho's lips curve beautifully into a smile, even if it's a teasing smile. Seungmin should hate that smug smirk, but he can't. "Hyung, can I kiss you?"
To his surprise, Minho nods and turns so he's fully facing Seungmin, legs tangling with his. They're still holding hands, somehow. He leans forward, and stops when he's a breath away from the older, apprehensive even though they've done it multiple times. Kisses late in the night, pecks when no one's looking, they've done it all. Why should this be any different?
Seungmin widens his eyes as soft lips press on his, insistent but tentative all the same. Minho's probably had enough of his doubt. That's when he fully lets go, lets himself jump into the dark void of uncertainty that is Lee Minho. His eyes flutter shut, and he angles his head to kiss deeper, closer, until their chests are flushed against each other. Minho bunching the fabric of his hoodie, on his waist, Seungmin's hands covering the expanse of Minho's cheeks and jaw. Seungmin thinks he can stay here forever.
They pull away, only to clash together again. Being with Minho like this is warm, familiar, no butterflies fluttering in his stomach, instead a furnace slowly enveloping his body with its heat. Seungmin can feel the faint hint of Minho's smile on his lips, can feel his own mouth quirk into a grin.
"Loser," Minho mumbles onto his lips.
Seungmin laughs and wraps his much larger hand around Minho's own on his waist, slots his lips against Minho's again, again, again. He feels a nip on his bottom lip, the older tugging on it, pulling it between his teeth. Seungmin whines at the action. His lips are probably red and bruised by now. He doesn't mind.
It was only until they get breathless do they pull away, gasping for air. Seungmin takes a look at Minho and promptly bursts into laughter. If looks could kill, Seungmin's probably been dead by now due to Minho's glare. "What's so funny?"
"We look like a mess."
"Well, whose fault was that?"
Seungmin giggles again, pressing his forehead against Minho's, knocking the tip of their noses together. "Mine, probably." He breathes in, buries his face in the crook of Minho's neck even if the position has his own neck protesting. The older's arms around him, gently playing with his neck the way Minho knows Seungmin likes it best, it makes him feel delicate, small like a child, like the world is a scary place and here, with his annoyingly beautiful hyung, is the safest place for him.
And if the others saw them asleep hours later, a mess of tangled limbs and blankets with kiss-bruised lips, well, let's just pretend they saw nothing. Minho will hit them if they tease him about it, anyway.