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The sun has setted, The bright sky now turned in different shades of dark blue to grey, the moon peeked and stars appearing one by one.
Everything is ready. The last notes, requests and reminders. The will and the want to do it running through his head. Lee Juyeon was set that he will do it and when he does he's sure he will succeed.
Juyeon walked on the shore, fine sands swallowing his feet. The cold breeze and the lonely illumination of the moon made everything in place.
Juyeon then kept on walking, not minding how his feet is already touched by the water. He kept walking and walking until half of his body was soaked. He continued to do so until the water was up to his neck and still kept on going until his feet touches nothing, until he; himself is the only thing that supports his body from the light waves of the ocean.
And then that's it, Juyeon then let himself sank; letting all the memories have a quick flashback. He tried to fight it at first slightly having a second thought but he was desperate and he was hopeless and so he let himself drown on the ocean along with his bottomless thoughts letting the water swallow him whole just like how he let events defeat him.
Juyeon thought he succeeded, he badly wants to succeed on doing it but how can he when someone has been on the shore as well seeing everything he does.
"If Juyeon doesn't come up from the water in the next 2 minutes I'm gonna shit myself" Changmin says talking to himself while drawing random shapes on the sand.
He and Juyeon has been friends for a while but there's still a wall between the two of them. Changmin is still unable to read Juyeon and so is Juyeon to him. However he let the man do what he wants to do thinking Juyeon is just trying out something.
"But what if he's just training? Tryna expand his lungs or something? Pfft i don't know we ain't swimmers though" he said like he was talking to someone "I would rather want him mad at me and let him don't talk to me for days on ruining his oh so called training rather than acting stupid when he's literally trying to drown himself in front of me" Changmin continued.
"Alright times up man he didn't got up." Changmin said standing up and dusting his bottoms "oh my fucking goodness what should i doooooo" he said loudly, running on to the water trying to find the Juyeon.
"Where the fuck is that man, i swear i just wanna play with the sand and emote ugh" he said finding Juyeon's hand and dragging him to the shore.
"Wake up." Changmin said trying his best to perform CPR just so he could save Juyeon. "You need to wake the fucking up, fight Juyeon you need to fight. Oh goodness I suck at this I hope I'm not too late." Changmin talking to the lifeless man trying everything he can.
"Fucking wake up oh my goodness I don't wanna look like a murderer here" Changmin said then trying to resuscitate him again doing his best that he can already inflate a big ass balloon and nearly crushing his chest every pumps.
Juyeon then suddenly coughed shaking up his whole body and ejected water from his mouth. A deep sigh of relief escaped from Changmin’s lips with the thought of He saved someone, Oh goodness his dumb self just saved Lee Juyeon.
"Oh my hooooo! I was scared as fuck. Oh my goodness you're okay, you're okay." Changmin said putting his arm around Juyeon's shoulder and drawing circles hoping it would give the older comfort.
"Ji Changmin..." Juyeon said trying to catch his breathe and collect himself he then started staring at the ocean, breathing slowly getting back to normal "I'm sorry..." He said pain and regret painted all over his face.
"Hey Juyeon it's alright, you're okay, we're okay." Changmin responded hoping the older doesn't feel guilty by being caught.
And after that then Juyeon bursted into tears, silence fills the air other than the cold whish of the winds and Juyeon's sobs.
"I... I don't know where to start.." Juyeon said in between his sobs trying his best to form words of explanation to the younger.
"It's alright, Take your time Juyeon we have the whole night and days here." Changmin said rubbing his palms against the olders back letting Juyeon lean his head on his shoulder.
Juyeon then slowly stopped crying trying to collect himself, remembering when, why and what happened. Maybe saying what burdens him can help.
"Everything was falling apart for me," Juyeon started finding comfort on Changmin’s shoulder looking down, trying to distract himself from crying with the sand around them.
"I don't know, I felt like I've lost everything. My passion to dance, My will to live, Myself? I don't know. I don't even know and that shits me the most" Juyeon said tiredness shown all over his face.
"Everything was just the same, I have nothing to wish for and nothing to comeback too. I felt like I have nothing." Juyeon continued tears starting to form once again.
"I'm so sorry for scaring you, I'm so sorry for ruining your night you're probably here as a time for yourself but here I am and I'm so sorry for ruining the mood of our whole trip with the whole dance team, I know this would not leave you the rest of the trip or even forever when the whole team is literally sleeping. I'm so sorry Changmin you have to see me like this." Juyeon apologized with all sincerity, feeling embarrassed on the younger as it was the first time someone saw him like this.
"Juyeon, you are a very strong person. Keeping them to yourself all alone and making up to this day is more than enough. You're already doing so well and I'm very much proud of you." Changmin said holding Juyeon's hand. It was the first time they felt completely comfortable to each other, Thick walls suddenly broken down and Changmin was more than grateful that Juyeon trusts him.
"You don't have to be sorry for anything. Our team went here for a reason, to rest and be ourselves and I'm more than thankful for sharing a piece of your mind to me. You're brave Juyeon, You are so brave." Changmin said genuineness was heard on his words.
And for the first time Juyeon had someone to listen, someone he can lean on and someone who can offer a shoulder. It was the first time the world has a different plan for him. It was the first time the small waves of the water leaded him to a different shore.
It was weird, having your dance mate caught you and saving you. It was much more weird telling him why even though he barely knows you other than your name and how you dance but it was Changmin, Luckily it was the Ji Changmin who was ready to be by his side.
"You worked so hard Juyeon and I hope you continue to live like before, except that I'm here now. I can be someone who will listen and I will be there with you on every fucking step of the way. You will not be alone now, You have me Juyeon. You don't have to sail and fight the waves alone anymore.
And so this is what warmth feels like, what love of a person feels like. He must be lucky then especially that it's him, that it was Changmin who made him feel that way.
Maybe this is a new beginning, maybe this love doesn't save him from drowning (even though he literally did) but will make him realize that there's still a lot of shores worth exploring.