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She had always been more Queen than mother. With Erik she had somewhat managed to combine the two roles. Wilhelm, she knew, had seen her mostly as the Queen. The last few years in particular, had been focused on damage control rather than motherly affection.
But as her staff told her of the incident and showed her the video, it was a mother’s heart that broke. It broke for her son. The back up. The “spare” one, who was now the leading man in the future of Sweden.
While the mother’s heart broke, the Queen’s mind started strategizing with her counsel.
In the car on the way to Hillerska, it was the Queen who was constantly on the phone. With her staff. With the school principal. With the designated reporter. Even with her husband. As soon as she entered Wilhelm’s room, though, the mother took over. The Queen would have watched him with steely disdain and let her face show every disappointed word her mouth couldn’t speak in front of others. She had feared that it was the Queen that would show herself, and was relieved when the mother swept in instead. Her hand caressed the forehead of her son. It wasn’t long before the Queen took over, but Kristina had needed that brief motherly moment to show herself that she was human.
As she was about to leave that night, the mother wanted to take her son in her arms, whisper that it would be okay and promise that they could make it work. In the end, the Queen tried to convey a little comfort while still maintaining proper etiquette.
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On Saturday, there was once again a battle between her motherly heart and her Queenly mind. As she saw the boy who descended the staircase behind Wilhelm, the mother saw the boy her son was clearly infatuated with. She took those few moments to look for sincerity and affection in Simon’s face and mannerism. She knew only too well the risk involved in letting mere mortals into the life of royalty. It wasn’t, however, nearly enough time to make up her mind about him before the Queen took a step forward and extended her hand.
In the car she could hardly believe it when it became obvious that Wilhelm thought that it could actually work - that he and this boy could be together. “You are a crown prince,” she said - “and that is a privilege not a punishment.” It was her go to phrase, and it brought her thoughts back several decades, to when her father the King had said the same thing to her; the young crown princess.
“Nobody has asked for this. You are the only one who can take over as crown prince after Erik.”
As soon as the words were out of the Queen’s mouth, the mother saw the hurt in her son’s eyes. She knew that she was once again giving him the impression that he was not measuring up in the Queen’s - and his mother’s - eyes. What she wasn’t able to say or show, was that while the Queen was looking out for her monarchy, the mother was looking out for her son. Just like she wasn’t able to separate being a Queen and a mother, it was impossible to separate Wilhelm from the monarchy. After Erik died he became the monarchy.
“You’re so young. When you’re young, love feels like the most important thing in the world. When I was your age, I too had an unfortunate romance.”
Again, her mind was brought back several decades. As the rest of the ride back to the palace went on in silence, the woman left the Queen and the mother be for a while, and was - in her mind - once again the 15 years old girl who laid eyes on the smiling boy who worked in the garden at their summer palace.
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When she asked Wilhelm if he was ready for the statement, he probably thought it was the Queen asking. But it was the mother who had found her way out. Her eyes tried to signal love and compassion for her son, but she wouldn’t blame him if what he saw was concern for and duty to the monarchy.
As she listened to her son - the crown prince - from the other room, her heart shattered even more. The Queen was forgotten for the time being. Right now she was all mother. A mother who would want nothing else than to barge in and stop the interview. But she knew she could do no such thing.
She knew it couldn’t be. If Erik hadn’t died perhaps... But now, as the crown prince, there was no possible way Wilhelm could live the life he wanted and deserved. The line had to be continued. She had no siblings, so the next in line to the throne was August, and there was no way she was going to let him be king. Not after what he had done.
This situation required another death. It was going to be the monarchy or her son’s heart. That’s why the Queen stayed put listening to the crown prince’s statement, and the mother silently cried for her son Wilhelm.
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Although she had been sure that her heart could not possibly break into even tinier pieces - not after Erik’s death and watching (making) Wilhelm lose his happy ending - she was proven wrong. The Queen and the mother spoke in unison when she told Wilhelm that she knew about August and that they were not going to do anything about it. She had no doubt that this was the right way to go about it. Still; Kristina’s heart ached when she said it, and almost stopped entirely when Wilhelm hung up on her. She feared the mother had lost her son forever. Maybe the Queen had finally won out for good. But as the Queen, she swore to herself that from now on she would make sure that August felt his relation to the royal family being much more of a punishment than a privilege. It was the least a mother could do.