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Amaurot made you feel small. It felt silly to think that considering the residents that towered over you but it wasn't just that.
The buildings. The atmosphere. The loneliness. It made you, the Warrior of Light, feel insignificant. Someone who many saw as a hero. Sometimes you didn't want that. You didn't want the burden of so many lives on your shoulder.
Yet here you were. Wandering around Amaurot with the fear of confronting your enemy.
Your comrades gave you time to yourself when you asked for it. They were worried, of course, but you reassured them you could hold your own. You joked about being the famed 'Ascian Slayer', a forced smile on your face you hoped would make them trust you.
The hesitation was there but they decided to split and search the city.
Something about this city brought a familiar feeling to your chest. Was it longing? What could you be wanting here? What made you feel this way? You knew the answer to these questions with how your heart picked up at the thought of meeting your enemy again. It left you wishing to see the Ascian you were supposed to defeat. Instead of fighting though, you wanted to talk with him. Just talk. To see why this was happening. The thought of coming here alone to see him after defeating Vauthry crossed your mind but when you thought of the Crystal Exarch...G'raha, you knew that you had to save him.
Passing by a tree with stones surrounding it to form a bench, something caught your eye. Something sparkled, as if it fell soundlessly from the tree branches above. Unable to walk away, you carefully climbed onto the bench to get a closer look.
A ring.
It was just a ring. A thick, intricate gold band with a dark purple gem gleaming in the light shining down from the buildings. Why would a ring be laying here? There was nothing in this city but memories of a lost time. One look around the path told you none of these Shades had left it. They only wandered, aimlessly and silently.
Turning back to the ring, you reached out to brush your finger against the smooth surface of the gem. It felt familiar. It scared you why this place made you feel like this.
Almost like you belonged.
Shaking your head to clear these thoughts, you snatched the ring up to take a closer look. The way it shone in the light had you sighing to yourself. It was a beautiful ring. Whoever lost it might miss it.
“Who dropped you?” you mumbled out loud, bringing the ring down as if it slip it on.
Your heart started to pick up for some reason as your fingertip pressed to the band. Would this be okay? It didn't belong to you but something compelled you to put it on. Taking in a deep breath, you slipped the ring onto your ring finger.
Nothing happened at first. It surprised you that it fit perfectly. You held your hand out to admire the piece of jewelry when suddenly you felt a wave of fatigue hit you. Dizziness overcame you, leaving you to cradle your head. Your body pressed back against the tree behind you to keep you upright. It didn't help as you started to slip down, feeling the dizziness start to overwhelm you.
As darkness started to dance around the edges of your vision, a tall figure came from one of the buildings. It wasn't one of the tall Shades. It was who you had been looking for.
“Emet...Selch?” you whimpered out, using your last bit of strength to hold your arm out to him as he approached.
A familiar smirk was the last thing you saw before darkness took over and you felt yourself fall.
A voice was calling someone's name. The voice was quiet, as if afraid to wake that someone. Soft. Caring. So full of an emotion you knew but never admitted.
It felt embarrassing to hear it, forcing your eyes open to get away from such an intimate setting. Your head still spun and ached. You didn't understand how you ended up near a couple in the moments they wanted to share together.
When your vision cleared, you were met with a mask. It made you jump in surprise to find yourself face to face with only a red mask with slits for eyes! Slowly you realized it was only half a mask and found a smirk that you had just seen moments ago.
“My dear, how are you able to sleep anywhere?”
The voice had you frozen in fear. It couldn't be. Emet-Selch wouldn't speak to you so casually. This person had more than one streak of white hair. His entire head was full white yet was cut in a similar way to the Ascian.
You lifted your hand to touch your aching head only to feel the smooth surface of something on your face!
“W-What-”
“Azem? Are you unwell?”
Realizing the person dressed in black robes was speaking to you, you looked back up at him. The man slipped off the mask with a sigh, making your eyes widen at the sight of the same golden eyes you kept seeing and getting lost in.
“Emet-Selch?”
“At your service. Come. I have some new Ideas to show you.”
The man who looked like Emet-Selch and sounded like him held his hand out after putting his mask back on. You were unsure what to do. This felt like a dream. This wasn't the Echo's doing. So how were you seeing this as the person he called 'Azem'?
Looking down from his face to his hand, you shyly took it.
Emet-Selch helped you to your feet from the bench and started to lead you down the path where many Shades were standing around. You watched them as you followed after Emet-Selch. At first they seemed to just be aimless until on threw their arms into the air and stomped off. It was then you realized they weren't just Shades. They were speaking to one another, some happily while a few argued over shared ideas as you passed them.
You looked around and saw instead of the ocean above, it was the night sky. This wasn't the Amaurot you had just been to. This had a beautiful night with stars splashed across the endless black sky.
You had stopped to stare up, barely noticing the gaze of Emet-Selch. He didn't pull away, squeezing your hand to bring you gaze back down.
“Where are we going?”
Emet-Selch smiled at you. It struck you to the core. Your heart ached and you wanted to cry. It wasn't his usual snarky smirk but a full smile. Something that felt wrong to see.
“My Office, of course. Where else would I keep my ideas?”
You tilted your head slightly, confused by his words.
“In your head?”
Emet-Selch started to walk ahead, gently pulling you along as he let out a loud laugh. An actual laugh that sounded genuine and true. It brought a flush to your cheeks.
“Dear Azem. How I've missed your strange jokes,” he said once he caught his breath, stopping to turn and bring his free hand up to cup your cheek.
The touch almost brought tears to your eyes. Emet-Selch treasured Azem. From how he spoke to you to how gentle his touch was. When your eyes locked with his through the mask, it was clear how he loved you. Loved Azem. His thumb brushed your warm cheek.
Who was Azem and why were you wearing her face like this?
Emet-Selch smiled down at your before he let his hand fall to lead you down the road at a quicker pace. His excitement clearly showed from how he kept looking over his shoulder to make sure you were still there.
As if you would suddenly disappear.
Emet-Selch's office was stacked high with books and papers on top of one another. If you guessed, the stack could've gone higher if he was any bit more taller.
“This idea... it is more akin to something you would think of... maybe something that has crossed your mind,” Emet-Selch mumbled as he seemed to be searching for something, digging through a few smaller piles of papers.
You didn't understand what he was talking about, curious of what he could be looking for in such a hurry. Wandering around the office, you stopped by a tall window that gave you a view of all of Amaurot.
It was beautiful. Lights were on in almost every window of every building that you could see. The sky was still dark, making you wonder if anyone took a break from their 'ideas'. Did they sleep at night? Did they go to bed with someone they loved?
Did Emet-Selch?
“Oh! Here it is!”
His voice had you turning around to see the masked man pulling something off his desk with an almost boyish grin on his face.
It was such a foreign look on the usually morose face that you were lost in that smile. You felt like you would never see something like that ever again.
“Here. This Idea... The Idea of something binding one's soul... not our actual souls, mind you but...”
Emet-Selch stepped up to you, fiddling with whatever he held. His cheeks were flushed, almost looking nervous when his honey colored eyes met yours through his mask. Your heart picked up, your left hand coming up to clutch at the spot where it started to pound harder and harder with each step he took until there was barely any room between you.
The man in front of you pulled his mask off, setting it down on the windowsill next to you before taking hold of the one you wore. It almost scared you at the thought of him seeing you underneath.
Were you Azem? Were you the Warrior of Light? When you saw the bird-like silver mask set down next to his red mask, you held your breath.
“Azem. This Idea is to bind lovers as one... an Idea I wanted to share with you.”
Emet-Selch took your hand from it's place on your chest to slip something onto your finger. You already knew. It was the same ring you found before this dream... this memory.
Tears welled up in your eyes as Emet-Selch brought your hand to his lips and pressed a kiss to your knuckles.
“My sun... So radiant...”
“Emet...”
Your voice wasn't your own, the surge of feelings making you weak. You clung to the tall man, hand clutching at his black robe. The way he looked at you made you feel loved and it frightened you. It terrified you.
You wanted him to see you as you. The thought made you sob, allowing Emet-Selch to cup your cheeks and pull you close enough to press your forehead to his.
“Will you share your life with me, Azem?”
“Yes.”
You didn't hesitate, leaning in to kiss him. Emet-Selch sighed happily into the kiss, his hands running down to hug your body to his.
You fit perfectly against him.
“Azem, my dear. I love-”
Your eyes flew open, finding yourself back on the bench. You looked down at your hands, finding your own and the ring still around your finger. Tears were still dripping down your cheeks, warm and never seeming to stop.
Why had this happened? Why were you allowed to feel such love and have it taken away in just a moment?
“Are you awake, my dear?”
The familiar voice brought you to your feet to stare at the Ascian, dressed in his royal robes and not the simple black one you remember. His hair was still dark save the one white streak.
You wanted to ask so many questions. Why did you experience these memories? Why had he shown up so suddenly? Why did you feel like this? Feel as if you wanted to hear him say the words you had just missed.
“Why?” you whispered, voice thick with tears and despair.
You half expected the Ascian to laugh at how pathetic you looked. He didn't. If anything, he looked just as hurt.
Emet-Selch stepped up to you, gloved hands reaching out to take the hand that wore the ring while the other cupped your cheek.
“You poor thing. You poor, poor thing. What you saw is the reason for my actions. For my lost love. Did it hurt? Did it break your heart not to hear those words?”
His voice was barely above a whisper, staring deep into your eyes as you tried to find your voice. Only a whimper left your lips, bringing a smirk to his face. Not the boyish grin that stole your heart. That stole Azem's heart.
“It did. Imagine how I felt when she was gone. Everyone I knew and loved disappeared from my life. This is all for them. For her.”
The broken sob didn't sound like you, your hand trying to pull away from his grasp. He softly chided you, bringing your knuckles to his lips as if to mock you with a kiss. It made something spark in your chest and you stilled.
“We were lovers. You and I...” he whispered in a graveled voice that had made you whimper.
You didn't understand and by the look on Emet-Selch's face, it seemed he didn't either. As if those words weren't his. As if someone said them for him.
Emet-Selch pulled away, glaring at you. The look of hate hurt more than anything.
“Keep that ring. Let it remind you of that moment. Go to your friends.”
The Ascian turned to leave. You knew this would be the last moment you would share together alone. Stumbling away from the bench and towards him, you caught his sleeve to stop him.
You didn't know why.
All you could do was wrap your arms around his waist and hug him from behind. You buried your face into his coat and didn't move. You couldn't find anything to say so you kept silent.
This moment was what you wanted to remember. The way Emet-Selch trembled in your arms as you held him close.
“She too would embrace me in such a way.”
It was all he said before he disappeared into a portal of black and purple smoke. You stood still, staring down where he had just stood.
With a deep, shaky breath, your feet led you back to your friends with your heart heavy and hands trembling as they tried to wipe the tears from your eyes.
The glint of the ring made a new river of tears flow down your face as you stared at the gleaming purple stone.
The ring weighed heavy on your left ring finger.