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Johnny walked to his home office, with a freshly brewed mug of coffee in his hand. He was quite behind on some reports he had to write, and he couldn’t afford to get distracted. However, being married to Ten, this proved to be easier said than done.
The tranquil environment that Johnny created in his office, only sounds being the intermittent chirps of birds outside and the ticks of the clock on the wall; was almost immediately interrupted as soon as he sat down by the abrupt screams of Ten.
“Johnny! Johnny, where are you?”
Johnny sighed as he heard Ten’s rapid footsteps getting closer and closer to his door.
Without knocking Ten burst through the door accompanied with a thick aura of animosity.
“Ten, I love you and I love talking to you but right now is not a good time. I have these reports-“
“I don’t care this is important.” Ten dragged out the last syllable to emphasise how serious the issue yet to be brought up is.
In Johnny’s eyes Ten was overly dramatic. This would not be the first time that he had expected to put his work on hold to listen to Ten go on and on about miniscule problems like some sort of celebrity news or the lack of his favourite brand of smoothie being in stock.
Anticipating for his time to be wasted Johnny let out a huff and gestured for Ten to go on and share the news with him.
“Look what I found in Renjun’s drawer.” Taking a step forward, Ten pulled out a yellow lighter and a box of Marlboro cigarettes from behind his back and waved them dangerously close to Johnny’s face.
Johnny took the items from Ten’s hands and eyed them carefully. “Where did you get these?”
“I got them from the drawer by his bed, it was locked so I picked it and found these.” Ten gestured to the items mid-sentence.
“Ten were you snooping?” Johnny looks up at him incredulously, eyes bulging.
“Okay yes, I was snooping but that’s besides the point, look what I found!”
Johnny shook his head but Ten was right there was a bigger issue at hand. “Okay it is. Where is he?”
“He is out with some friends at the moment, but I texted him a code red and he should be home any minute now. We need to talk to him about this.”
Twenty minutes later the front door crept open and Renjun was met with Johnny and Ten waiting for him expectantly.
“Hey Dad, I got your code red, what's up?” Renjun looked between his parents, giving them a questionable glance.
“Come to the kitchen, let’s talk.” Johnny spoke with a soft voice; it was not out of character but soft enough to evoke some suspicion from Renjun.
Following his parents to the kitchen Renjun sceptically sat down at the kitchen island. “You guys are acting weird.” Renjun let out a small chuckle as he waited for them to speak.
Ten placed the cigarettes and lighter on the surface and made eye contact with his son.
Renjun’s face visibly dropped, he wanted to be angry, his privacy had been invaded after all. But he was smarter than that and he knew how to spin this in his favour.
Ten slid the items towards him and began his interrogation. “Sweetie, would you mind telling me what this is?”
Renjun guffawed, “Those are cigarettes, and this is a lighter.” Renjun spoke with a sickeningly sweet and patronising voice, pointing to each item as he spoke.
“I know what they are I’m not stupid, what I am really asking here is: what were they doing in your room?” Ten tried playing nice but what he was not going to do is sit there and be ridiculed by his own child.
“What were you doing in my room? I think addressing that would be much more interesting.”
Johnny was astonished; he knew the answer to Ten’s question, Renjun knew the answer to Ten’s question, even Ten knew the answer but he could not believe how expertly Renjun was avoiding it.
Ten turned to Johnny and rapidly lifted his eyebrows up and down as a signal for him to step in as it looked like they would get nowhere if they carried on like this.
Johnny was never the one to beat around the bush, especially in situations he already did not have time for.
“Renjun, we just want to know are you smoking or not?”
“Yes, I am.” Renjun dramatically looked left and right followed by up and down. “Oh wow, phew. I just wanted to see if the world would implode."
“Yeah, this is what we are not going to do.” Ten shook his head and let out a huff. “You will give me any more cigarettes that you have and there will be no more smoking.” Ten ended his sentence with a clap signalling that it was final and there was no changing his mind.
“That’s rich coming from you.” Renjun scoffed looking directly into his father’s eyes.
Ten was a hypocrite, in fact If hypocrisy were a disease Ten would be dying a long and painful death. There was always one set of rules for him and another for everyone else. He wasn’t proud of this thought process but to him it was too late to change anything now.
“Excuse me.” Ten’s face fell, appalled by the disrespect coming from his son.
“What position are you in to tell me whether or not I can smoke? You smoke like a chimney.” Renjun cocked his head to the left anticipating the answer, there was surely no coming back from this; Ten had walked directly into his trap.
“First of all, I am your father, it is my job to tell you what you can and cannot do. Secondly, I am an adult; I pay car insurance and I have a mortgage so I can smoke. You on the other hand, you are seventeen, you are a child.”
“Oh please.”
The teenager rolled his eyes and slouched further into the kitchen stool. Renjun was cantankerous, some say that he was very sharp and had a quick wit whereas others just found him rude. His short fuse inherited directly from Ten caused the two to clash, and recently they struggled to have conversations without a mediator.
Due to some sort of divine intervention Johnny put on his mediator hat and started to diffuse the situation.
“I see this is my queue to intervene.” Johnny waited for Renjun to sit up and the focus to be shifted to him before he continued.
“Both of you make very valid points.” Johnny made eye contact with both Ten and Renjun, so they knew he was acknowledging them both. “Renjun, you need to listen to your Dad, he’s just looking out for you and he has your best interest at heart always. However, I also believe that as parents we must lead by example. By this I mean that we can’t say that he can’t do something only for us to do the exact same thing in the next room over.”
The last part of Johnny’s speech struck a nerve for Ten, there was a prominent lack of role models in Ten’s life as a teen and he would be damned if his son’s teenage years were the same.
“Fine! From today onwards in this house there will be no smoking. Not from me, not from Johnny and certainly not from you Renjun. Do we have a deal?”
Ten rested his palms on the cool marble surface of the kitchen island after his proposal.
Ten looked at Renjun, who appeared to be deep in thought after listening to his Dad.
Ten snapped his fingers in an attempt to get the boy out of his trance. “Renjun there is nothing to think about, it wasn’t supposed to be an offer.”
“Can I at least have the rest of the pack?”
“Go to your room.”
***
After brushing his teeth and removing his contacts, Ten exited his and Johnny’s shared bathroom. In his bedroom he was met with Johnny in bed reading an article on his laptop. Johnny was so engrossed in what he was reading he failed to recognise Ten’s presence in their room until the younger rid his side of the bed from decorative pillows and laid down.
“Oh, hi I didn’t hear you coming in.”
Ten rested his phone on his chest and turned to Johnny, resisting all urges to roll his eyes and instead asked him to enlighten him as what he was reading must be so interesting.
“I found this article that could help you, with you know quitting smoking.”
To Ten it was adorable how gullible Johnny could be at times, to be fair it was almost childlike. He wanted to give him credit for being proactive, but he couldn’t help but laugh in his face.
Amidst his fit of laughter Ten hurled himself into an upright position clutching onto his stomach.
After he calmed down and took a few breaths to ease his breathing, Ten took his hands to cup Johnny’s face and gave him a disgustingly sarcastic look of despair, jutting his bottom lip out.
“Baby.” With Johnny’s face still in his hands Ten lightly caressed his thumb against his right cheek while shaking his head. “I’m not quitting, and even if I wanted to, I’m not starting today. Rome wasn’t built in a day or whatever the phrase is.” Ten laid back down and went back on whatever app he was using on his phone.
“That’s not how you use the phrase-.” Johnny would love to go on, but he had bigger issues at hand than Ten’s misuse of idioms.
“Ten this is serious, and I think that we should finally address your nicotine addiction.” Johnny hushed the last part of his sentence, although the idea of smoking had never been a touchy issue between the two now that involved Renjun he couldn’t help but assume that he would get a different reaction.
“Nicotine addiction?” Ten gasped incredulously, it was true but there was no need to call him out like that. “I do not have a nicotine addiction; in fact, I have a very healthy relationship with nicotine.”
“I don’t think there’s such thing as a ‘Healthy relationship with nicotine’.”
Johnny could already see that he was losing Ten in this conversation and he himself was too tired to push for Ten to engage. He knew they probably wouldn’t pick this up again for a while, but he had to wave his white flag at some point.
“Can we talk about this later? I am ever so tired.” Ten spoke with a horrific impression of a southern bell and accompanied the phrase with a dramatic yawn.
Johnny nodded and left a small peck on Ten’s cheek, placing his laptop on his side table, turning off the lamp, and allowing the two to fall into a deep slumber.
***
It had been a week since the implementation of the ‘Smoking ban’ and Renjun was going through it. Obviously he hadn’t stopped smoking, but he had often found himself smoking at a ridiculous hour of the morning or having three cigarettes simultaneously. It's not like he had a schedule for smoking, but this seriously fucked up his mojo.
Renjun was now sat on the grass in his local park with his two best friends Jaemin and Jisung. The two friends were engulfed in conversation whereas Renjun was preoccupied. Renjun was about to take what would be his third tab but he was rudely interrupted by Jaemin.
“Do you want to slow down?”
“I’m sorry, last week my dad was all like ‘in this house there will be no smoking’ so now I have to smoke outside.” Renjun huffed and flopped back onto the freshly cut grass underneath him.
Jisung turned to look at Renjun looking baffled. “I don’t think that’s what he meant.” Jisung shook his head while looking down at him. “But I think I’m just gonna…” Jisung gently removed the cigarette box and lighter from Renjun’s hands and placed them in his pockets. Jisung wasn’t too fond of smoking and used this as an attempt of a preventative measure.
“I need to one up him.” Renjun hoisted himself into an upright position before continuing to speak. “He’s such a hypocrite and he always gets his way I’m so fucking tired- “
Renjun cut himself off due to internal realisation and his face lit up.
Jaemin and Jisung recognised that face, they knew that he had something up his sleeve and they did not want to be part of it at all.
Jaemin shook his head rapidly. “No, no, no. Whatever you’re thinking of the answer is a no from me. I refuse to get involved in another one of your schemes.”
Renjun offered Jaemin a patronising smile with a light chuckle.
“No silly!” Renjun gave Jaemin a playful shove while maintaining this perfect smile. “I’m not scheming, I’m gonna do something nice for my dad.”
This was still a major red flag for the two. Renjun didn’t do nice things for anybody, not even his blood, especially when he felt he had been done wrong.
“Come on, we're going shopping. I need to buy a cake.”
***
To say that Renjun had gone all out would be an understatement. He had spent the last thirty quid in his bank account to buy a cake (not just any cake a Colin the caterpillar) and all the horrendous party decorations he could find in the shop.
Between taping streamers and balloons to the walls he takes a break to step down from the ladder that he was standing on to send a message to his dad.
To: Dad – J
[16:29] Hi, I assume you’re coming home with dad so when you guys get here please come to the living room, I have a huge surprise :)
Renjun knew that they would be home around five, so it gave him more than enough time. He readily finished decorating the living room and waited for their arrival.
In just short of forty minutes Renjun heard the sound of the front door opening, at this point it was do or die. He had either wasted thirty quid or he had finally managed to outsmart and one up his father.
As per the instructions left in the text message, Johnny and Ten made their way to the living room and their jaws dropped. Their once clean contemporary living room had been buried in plastic confetti, balloons, and paper streamers, Ten was so astonished with the state of his living room the thought of the tape used for the streamers chipping the paint on the wall was miles from his mind.
And the icing on the cake, two helium balloons placed in the centre of the room, one silver number 1 and one blue letter ‘W’.
“Surprise!” Renjun extended his arms, presenting the living room to his parents. “We’re having a party!” Renjun clapped his hands over enthusiastically, the smile on his face not falling an inch.
Johnny’s curiosity got the better of him and took it upon himself to break the silence that had fallen upon them after Renjun’s exclamation. “That’s lovely Jun but, what’s the occasion?”
“Well, today marks one week free of smoking and I thought it was cause to celebrate.”
With that one sentence Ten’s face dropped along with his stomach. He turned to Johnny to nonverbally communicate that he fucked up.
Seeing Ten’s facial expression intensified the smile on Renjun’s face, this wasn’t about the party it had never been about the party, Renjun had finally won.
The elongated silence was broken by Renjun presenting the things that he had prepared for their party. “I got us a cake.” Renjun gestured to the Colin The Caterpillar with seven haphazardly placed candles resting on the coffee table beside him. “Seven candles, one for each day we’ve had smoke free.” Renjun finished with a few enthusiastic claps.
Collin wasn’t just a cake he was a giant staple in Renjun’s childhood, Ten had gotten him one every birthday since he was four. The cake held a special meaning to them and that’s exactly why he got it.
From the outside looking in this would be called emotional manipulation but in Renjun’s eyes this was simply reverse psychology. He knew his opponent’s weaknesses and he was using them to his advantage; this was purely tactical. It was like Ten was playing checkers but Renjun was playing chess.
Ten had been silent the entire time he’d been home. The guilt had been eating him up from the inside. What had happened to him? He never felt guilty.
Renjun’s expectant eyes forced him to speak up. “This is amazing Jun, you didn’t have to go through all this trouble, we could have just watched a movie.” Ten scratched the back of his head with a small weak laugh.
“No, Dad, you deserve this. I’m so proud of you, it must be so hard.”
Except it wasn’t hard because Ten hadn’t quit anything.
Renjun looked back to the cake, although it had played its role, he couldn’t let it go to waste.
“Do we have any matches? For the candles, I chucked my lighters.” Renjun asked nobody in particular.
“There are some in the kitchen, I’ll show you where.” Johnny didn’t really know where the matches were, but he had a burning question for Renjun.
Once they reached the kitchen Renjun started opening some of their drawers in search for the matches until he was interrupted.
“Renjun cut the bullshit, you’re just trying to one up him, aren’t you?”
Renjun turned around and leaned against the worktop and smiled back at his dad. “Isn’t it obvious?”
The two shared a laugh before Johnny made his way to the door.
“Let’s go and get some good use out of that cake.”