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The first time they meet, Drest is killing time while waiting for Diplomacy to be repaired. He’s been staying in a small city near Mölln, long enough for him to do the things he's been putting off for a while.
The city is not big enough for him to grow uncomfortable, but it's still not a place where Drest would choose to spend more time than what's necessary.
The last two contracts he's taken have filled his purse nicely, so he's not really worried about the price the blacksmith will ask. (It helps that for some weird reasons, human blacksmiths always think that dwarves know those things better than them. They don't. Drest really doesn't.)
But for once he's not worried about having enough money, so he decides he deserves to treat himself to something nice to eat. For once.
There's a crowded market, close enough to the smithy, filled with people and food, stands that sell almost everything, and general, utter chaos. Chaos means that no one will actually pay attention to Drest, and that's completely fine by him.
Except things don't go like Drest planned - because they never do - and he spends half of the time with the nagging feeling he's being... followed? There's someone or something definitely looking at him, but Drest can't seem to find out exactly what's happening.
It takes him a while to see a glimpse of just who exactly seems to have taken an interest in him. There's a goddamn elf who's not exactly following him through the market. Not exactly, no, but close enough for Drest to feel highly uncomfortable.
(He has never been someone for company, thank you very much. If he wanted company he would’ve stayed with the rest of his family in Rovan. Instead, he’s wandering around doing occasional jobs as an adventurer because he doesn’t like company. Especially not when it comes to elves.)
It doesn’t feel like a dangerous situation, mostly because they’re surrounded by people. And because Drest is pretty sure one of his arms equals three of the elf.
Still, he doesn’t like this, and he has no idea why the elf is doing what he’s doing.
Drest buys his food, goes back to the blacksmith, pays for his ax, and leaves the village as soon as he can.
Better safe than sorry.
The second time they meet, Aine robs him of two hundred gold pieces.
Drest doesn’t usually handle contracts about other human beings (too messy, you never know who’s right and who’s wrong and you end up in your bed overthinking what you did and what you could’ve done). But he’s been laying too low, and he needs the money, so he takes the contract and goes hunting a few scattered thieves.
Drest finds them, fights with them, ties them up, and then gets promptly knocked out with a really strong blow on his head.
Which, first of all, rude.
It takes him a few seconds to feel stable on his feet again, but a few seconds are all it takes for the Mother-be-damned elf to tie him too.
“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?”
"I'm taking the means to collect my reward," the elf answers with a smirk, and Drest wouldn’t like anything more than to wipe that fucking expression from his face.
(But he can’t. Because he’s been tied up by someone who shouldn’t have been able to knock him out in the first place.)
He could be very young or very old, there’s no way to tell with those damned elves. Either way, he’s stunning. Drest might be poor-mannered and pisses off, but he’s not a fool, and he’s not blind.
“You mean my reward. I did all the work. You’re stealing from me.”
“Ah, well. I prefer the technical term relocating.”
“What?”
“Yes, I’m relocating what you think was your good work into my hands. I was looking for these guys, same as you, and it seemed a pity to do all the work and leave nothing for you to do.”
Drest does his best not to show he’s fighting against the ropes (even though he is) and does absolutely nothing to hide the growl that leaves his lips.
“Well, then, if it’s all right by you, I’ll take my leave now. See you soon?”
“Oh, you can bet your pointy ears you’ll see me soon. And you’ll wish we didn’t meet.”
The elf laughs (stupid fucking crystal clear laughter) and leaves Drest to untie himself. It takes him hours and a lot of curses.
It pains him to say it, but his cousin was right. Fucking elves.
The third time they meet, Drest has learned the elf’s name. He has spent the better part of a week asking around to find out who exactly collected the reward for his work.
The elf’s name is Aine, and Drest is now on his trail.
He's not particularly worried about what's going to happen: the damn elf doesn't know Drest is coming - he has no way of knowing -, and this time Drest is gonna be ready.
So, naturally, something entirely different from what he had planned happens. Drest really should start praying more, because if the last weeks mean something, the Mother isn't particularly pleased with him.
He's facing bandits, now. And not because he took a contract, no. Because he was too careless, too focused on his own pursuit. And now he's fighting against a whole group of those fuckers, and as much as Drest knows he's good, this is most definitely not gonna end well.
His two axes were thrown away from him, even though he managed to hurt one of those fuckers, and there's no way he can reach one of them before one of the bandits acts. Drest has a knife in his left boot, but they're watching his every move and at the moment he can't reach it.
That's the moment Aine appears out of thin air.
Well, he doesn't, but to Drest it definitely looks like it.
He appears out of thin air and... smirks at the man in front of him. Drest doesn't really understand what's happening, but clearly neither do the bandits.
Aine whirls around, throws the knife he's holding, and grabs Drest's ax in a single, smooth movement. The next second, two of the bandits are down and the third is quickly scrambling away, the second ax stuck in the ground, too close to his groin for comfort.
The fourth one has a look on his face like he's trying to assess the situation. It takes him only a few seconds to decided it's definitely better to scram.
"Well well well. Looks like you owe me a favor."
Drest looks up, finds Aine’s twinkling eyes and he suddenly knows he's fucked. Completely and utterly fucked.
They meet again, for the fourth time, somewhere along one of the main roads of Kiteni.
(Not that Drest had thought of him after what happened. Not at all. He didn't even ask around to see if by any chance he could've found Aine again. Not at all. They just... happen to be going in the same direction. That's it.)
Aine doesn't seem bothered by their sudden meeting. Or, well, another of their sudden meetings. He laughs when Drest mutters something about getting his money back, but doesn't tell him to go away. So they... they stay together. They keep walking together.
Drest forgets all about his previous destination, and Aine never talks about the fact that they're basically traveling together. Neither of them says anything about that. Or about the fact that when they finally get to the next guild, they take the same contract.
(Or the fact that neither of them corrects the guild master when she assumes they work together.)
Drest doesn't know why. He doesn't understand what's happening, and he most definitely doesn't know why he's acting the way he's acting. It's the first time in his entire life that he has felt anything like this.
He usually doesn't like people. He's glad to be alone, he has no need for those big families or those large companies of people getting along together. He knows he's... difficult. And it's better to be alone than to be constantly reminded of how difficult he is.
(And how grumpy he is, how moody he is, how he's not fun. How no one really likes to be around him, how everyone feels like they have to, but no one really wants to spend time with him. How his family spends time with him out of duty.)
Drest usually doesn’t like people, but for the first time in his life he feels like he wouldn’t mind the company of someone else. Of Aine. Which is even dumber, as a whole thing, because they don’t know each other, because the only thing Drest knows about Aine is that he robbed him of two hundred gold pieces.
And the only thing Aine knows about Drest is that... well. He most definitely needs to show the elf he’s good with his weapons. Definitely.
When they part, although briefly, Drest knows a great deal more about Aine. Now he knows Aine comes from Eswal, that he can hold his drink a lot better than Drest. He knows that Aine can be snarky and sarcastic most of the time, and still be caring and thoughtful.
He learns that Aine likes to eat meat - and who knew? The stereotype isn’t true, he should write to his family. He learns that Aine’s preferred choice of weapons is knives. A lot of them. Hidden everywhere.
He learns that when he wants, Aine can flirt with anything and everything alive. Or not alive, they never met anyone dead for Aine to try, so Drest decides to suspend his judgment. He also learns that’s usually just a façade, and that Aine usually gets what he wants because of it.
And that’s okay, really. It is.
(He doesn’t really want to think about all the things he revealed to Aine. He doesn’t really want to think about how many things Aine now knows about him. He most definitely doesn’t want to admit that he’s scared. That Drest has never let anyone this close to him. That he doesn’t know what he’s supposed to do, that sometimes he feels so anxious he thinks his heart isn’t working properly.)
When they meet again, for the fifth time, Drest feels like he's found home.
That single thought scares him more than everything he's faced before. More than the damned Gwyn ap Nudd, more than anything else. And it shouldn't be like this, Drest knows it, he knows there's something very wrong with him.
First of all, nothing's ever gonna happen.
He’s a mean, ugly motherfucker. There’s no way in all of Dünya that someone like Aine could really be interested in him. There's no need to panic about something that will never, ever happen.
But if something were to happen - which is, again, completely, utterly impossible -, Drest wouldn't know what to do. It's not like he doesn't have experiences. He does. He just doesn't have a lot of experience about being actually interested in someone.
(In dreaming about someone, in pushing his bedroll closer to that specific someone without saying anything, in brushing his own hand against that someone's hand and pretending it was nothing more than a friendly gesture.)
Aine always looks like he knows what he's doing. Drest envies that more than anything else.
They keep traveling together until Drest stops counting the times they met and starts counting the days they’ve been journeying together.
He finds out other things about Aine until he thinks there is little he doesn’t know about the elf. And Drest knows he’s talking a lot about himself, too, he knows that Aine now knows a lot of stuff about him.
But that, incredibly, doesn’t feel like a problem.
And Drest honestly feels like they could keep going like that for ages, in that companionable friendship that lets them basically live together. On the road, yes, but together.
Drest doesn’t mind not having a home, that’s not something he ever needed before. And if this lets him have Aine? Even just a little bit? He’ll go on like this until his knees grow too old to support him.
“So,” Aine asks one night, when they’re resting near the small campfire. It’s colder than they’re used to, being so close to the frontier between Kiteni and Rovan, and being almost winter. The fire is a necessity, and it much better having to sleep less to keep guard than freeze to death.
“So?”
“So,” Aine has his trademark smirk on his lips, and Drest has already started fearing for himself. “When were you going to tell me?”
“Tell you what?”
“You know what.”
“... No, I don’t. I’m asking because I don’t.”
Aine chuckles lightly and somehow that’s the most terrifying sound Drest has ever heard.
“When were you going to tell me you like me?”
There's a long, stretched moment of silence, when Drest is both praying the Mother for the ground to open up and swallow him whole and thinking about what excuse he could use. A long moment, with Aine's eyes fixed on him, when Drest can think about anything else but getting up, grabbing his stuff, and running away.
Then, Aine kisses him.
In retrospect, Drest is pretty sure his brain just stopped functioning.
There’s a kiss. A kiss happening between him and Aine. Aine initiated the kiss. It took Drest a good few seconds but he’s definitely reciprocating it.
It all happens in such a state of shock that Drest is left speechless. And breathless.
“Because I like you too,” Aine whispers against his lips, and Drest has to close his eyes for a few seconds. It all seems too good to be true, it all seems like a product of his imagination.
It’s probably something Drest is dreaming (o daydreaming) about. It probably is something he’s imagining because he ate something he shouldn’t have. But then again...
Fuck it.
This time, Drest is the one who kisses first.
When they kiss, everything changes, and in some way it also stays the same. No one could fault Drest if he needs to know just how soft is the feeling of Aine skin under his calloused hands.
No one could fault him for keeping this one thing he can have, for treasuring this one thing every day until the day he won’t have it anymore.
(Because that day will come, Drest is sure of it. He doesn’t know why or how or what will happen, but he knows it will.)
But nothing happens for a long time, so much that Drest finally starts thinking maybe... maybe just this one thing will go like he wants it to go.
Which, in retrospect, was really stupid of him.
It all goes splendidly - monstrosities and foul creatures aside -, until the day it doesn’t.
Drest should’ve known that things were not going to last. He never has luck, and he should’ve known better than that.
He can't tell the exact moment things started to go downhill. It's a long process, something that happens gradually, slowly, and steadily.
Aine starts asking questions about Drest's family. And that wouldn't be a problem, really, it would only be something to deal with if not for the fact that Aine wants to know everything. He wants to know why Drest is away from his family, wants to know if he's ever going to get back to them, wants to know what Drest plans for the future.
And for the first time since Aine appeared into his life, Drest starts having doubts again.
Because apparently, Aine isn’t like him. Apparently, Aine wants other things that Drest really, truly doesn’t. Like settling down, like having plans for the future.
Things that, even if he did want them, just aren’t for him.
Why settling down if you know for sure no one would want to stay around you? Being around you where there are creatures to fight and bandits to hunt is something... being around you all the time, every single day of your life is something else.
Aine doesn’t know that, Drest has made sure to repress all those nasty parts of him that always drew everybody else away. Aine doesn’t know, but he will one day.
And Drest isn’t ready to face that.
Anxiety comes back in a rush, all at once.
There’s no escaping that, Drest knows it too well. It starts and there’s no end, there’ll be no end until he’ll remove the source
.
It blows up one day when Drest feels like he can’t breathe anymore, like he’s underwater and crushed by a pressure he can’t get rid of.
Aine asks questions once again, but for the first time, Drest refuses to answer. Aine questions that too, and Drest stops listening to reason.
They exchange words, words that shouldn’t have been spoken. Words that Drest can't take back, words that he couldn't take back even if he wanted to. It's easier to pretend he never cared than to explain fears he knows would make him seem weak. He's never, ever been good at this.
It doesn't take long to come up with excuses. It doesn't take long to come up with lies that explain how he doesn't really want anything serious, anything lasting, anything of the sort. Not with Aine, at least.
(And there's nothing further from the truth than that, but the voice in Drest's mind keeps saying it's better if you do this, you don't want to be left alone in a few years, you don't want to be the one left behind. It's safer this way.)
Aine looks hurt, more than Drest would ever want to know, for just one second. Then he gets angry, just like Drest had thought, just like Drest had hoped. Except it's so much harder than he thought, and it becomes increasingly difficult to just- stand there and let that thing continue.
But Drest has always been stubborn.
Aine leaves without looking back, going the opposite way, and Drest is finally alone.
It takes him a few weeks to get completely out of the anxiety thrall. By then, it's too late.
Drest was wrong, completely utterly wrong.
And what? What could he do? Go back to Aine, find Aine wherever he is, and beg for his forgiveness? Explain that he’s stupid and scared and he didn’t really mean it? Explain that he’d do anything if that would make Aine happy, even go back to his own family and stay in the same place forever?
Explain that he was so scared that it seemed better to just... let it happen? Let what he feared the most happen, to just cause it.
He couldn’t.
Aine wouldn’t accept it.
And the truth is that Drest is too much of a coward to do it. What’s done is done, he only has himself to blame, there’s nothing else that can be done.
Two years later, Drest stops wandering around and settles somewhere in the northern parts of Troven. That seems like the smart thing to do. He doesn't really care. He finds there's nothing much he cares about, lately.
Three years later, Drest finds Niv out there in the snow, and suddenly discovers just one more thing he could care about.
Seven years later, Drest finds out there’s nothing wrong with settling down, not if the right people are with you. Ten years later, Drest finds out not everyone in your life thinks you’re a nuisance - not everyone in your life will end up thinking you’re a nuisance. You just need to give them the chance to prove it.
It's still too late.