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“Please Atsumu-san.”
Atsumu looks at the woman in front of him, her eyes pleading in earnest. After a few seconds, he sighs in defeat and the woman lets out a small ‘yes’ , her fist clenched.
“Why would ya wanna come anyways?”
His question startles the woman, prompting her to stop stirring her drink. She looks him in the eye, breaking into a small melancholic smile. “I just want to see Kiyoomi happy,” she replies and sips her drink.
Atsumu sits in silence, letting the woman elaborate. She places her drink back on the table, crossing her legs in the process, and continues, “I want to be there… to see him finally happy.” Now, Atsumu does not expect this, how can this woman bear to think of witnessing such a scene? Instead of asking, he remains silent; he knows she has more to say.
“Ever since the training camp, no- Since the first time he saw you standing on the opposite side of the net...” The woman turns her gaze outside, relishing the sight of a busy Osaka morning. She admires the raindrops cascading on the window before breaking into a small smile.
“I knew how it bothered him… how the thought of you bothered him so much. I knew something was up but I let it slide, it was Kiyoomi after all,” she chuckles lightly. “There was never a day of peace in his life. Well, not until he accepted himself. His inner self that he tried so hard to bury, afraid of how the world would react.”
Atsumu can only lower his head. This is his first time hearing all the struggles Kiyoomi experienced, and the thought frustrates him that he wasn’t there to console him. He wanted to be there when Kiyoomi was at his weakest… his lowest of lows.
“But lucky for him, I realized things early on. I talked to his parents and encouraged him to open up, thankfully he did. I mean, look at him now… He’s finally allowed himself to be free,” the woman sheds a tear. Atsumu hands her a handkerchief, to which she accepts and mumbles a quiet ‘thank you’ .
“Does that satisfy your question, Atsumu-san?” The man nods his head in a heartbeat, unwilling to see her break down this instant. She sniffles before composing herself, relaxing her legs as she sighs.
“I trust you will not let this reach Kiyoomi’s ears,” Atsumu agrees, sipping on his iced latte. It would be bad news if Kiyoomi were to ever know his ex asked out (definitely not a date) his fiance.
“Then, I shall get going,” the woman stands up, clutching her purse in one hand and the other straightening her dress. Before she can leave, Atsumu stops her, “I’ll send ya the invite sometime this week.” The woman smiles, her eyes forming crescents and tears prying at their corners.
“I look forward to it, Atsumu-san.”
✉
In the back of the church, the woman sits there, dressed in a silk powder blue dress. Her hands tightly clutch her purse, extremely nervous as intrusive thoughts race inside her mind. She nearly jumps when she feels a hand on her shoulder, turning her head to face who it is.
“I see that ya made it,” the woman releases a sigh when she sees Atsumu, sleek in his white suit with black accents. She smiles at him, still feeling a bit jittery, “Yes I did. Thank you for inviting me, Atsumu-san.”
“Let’s jus’ hope Omi-kun won’t kill us,” Atsumu laughs and so does the woman, her shoulders no longer tense. She silently thanks the man for his unconscious attempt at comforting her.
“Why dontcha sit near the front? Omi’s parents would be glad ta see ya.” She shakes her head and replies, “I assume they will start apologizing to me… I am just avoiding that possibility.” Atsumu hums before saying goodbye when he hears the organizer call for his attention.
✉
“Enter, the groom.” The woman shifts her attention from the front to the door, and for a brief second, her eyes meet the groom’s. She smiles and waves, but confusion and surprise cloud the other’s face. She mouths, ‘We’ll talk later.’ The groom nods as he continues the path to the makeshift altar inside the glass building, Motoya trailing behind him.
After a few more people, the organizer finally announces, “Enter, the bridegroom.” Claps of different intensities welcome Atsumu, who’s strutting down the carpet. He manages to lock eyes with his fiance, his gaze soft and loving. This is a side of Kiyoomi nobody has seen, and he reserves it for Atsumu only.
Once Atsumu meets Kiyoomi in front of the officiant, he can’t seem to suppress his grin. The thought of being ‘Sakusa Atsumu’ in an hour invades his mind, and he’s loving it. Kiyoomi, on the other hand, looks calm but his constant fidgeting seems to tell another story.
“Now, we shall begin the ceremony.”
✉
“Care to explain why you’re here, Akayama Mieko?” Kiyoomi asks the woman, who seems too preoccupied with the buffet to notice the groom beside her. Mieko looks at the man before shifting her attention back to the food, “I asked Atsumu-san to give me an invite, assuming you would not.”
Kiyoomi scoffs, crossing his arms and lifting a brow. “I would have, but I don’t know if you still live in your former residence,” he blurts out an excuse, in which the woman knows he’s lying. Mieko turns her eyes to meet him, staring right into his soul. “Fine. I felt guilty,” Kiyoomi mumbles the last few words, hoping the woman won’t hear him.
“There’s nothing to be guilty of, Kiyoomi. You merely wanted to express yourself, to be understood.” The groom looks at her, his eyes deep as he lets the words sink.
“You’re quite lucky I was the first to notice your difficulties. If it was Motoya, I doubt he'd be of much help,” Mieko giggles, scanning through the crowd to locate the groom’s brunette cousin.
Kiyoomi smiles, appreciating the sight of the woman laughing. Years have already passed since he last saw the bliss in her eyes, and he still feels bad for leaving her, alone and with no one to confide in. Before Mieko became his girlfriend, she was his first friend, a very close one, too. She was one of the first people he allowed to touch him and in return, she helped him cope whenever he was in a slump. Mieko was and will always be an irreplaceable existence in his life, though it was a shame he can’t return her feelings.
“I’m really sorry for what happened, Mieko,” the woman glares at him, telling him to stop with the useless apologies. “What happened in the past has passed, Kiyoomi. Not once have I ever regretted my actions so stop that,” she scolds him and Kiyoomi nods, deciding to keep his mouth shut.
Mieko picks up a glass of sparkling Rosé from a waiter. “You’d better treat Atsumu-san well. I will have to make him report to me whenever you mess up, ” Mieko declares, swirling her drink before sipping. “Ugh, you’re even worse than Osamu,” Kiyoomi grumbles as the woman raises her head high, considering the former’s comment a compliment.
“That just means I am doing my job well,” she turns to face Kiyoomi, smiling as her eyes form crescents. “I promised Aunt I’d make you happy. Well, not in the way she wanted but still… I think I fulfilled my promise.”
His heart clenches, whether it’s from guilt or elation, he doesn’t know. What Kiyoomi knows is he’s delighted to meet Mieko again, to hear her comforting words amidst the formality in her tone. He hugs her, fighting his tears from flowing out from his eyes. Mieko, with her free hand, pats the taller man’s back, hushing and assuring him everything’s okay.
In the corner of his eye, Atsumu notices this and excuses himself, striding towards the two. He then asks, “What’s wrong Omi-omi?” The man in question lifts his head, staring at his husband’s face.
“Nothing, I…” Kiyoomi can’t seem to explain, in fact, he doesn’t want to. He chooses to avoid the events that will surely transpire after explaining the situation. At that moment, Mieko speaks, turning their attention to her. “I was telling Kiyoomi to stop apologizing to me. He still blames himself, apparently.”
Atsumu glares at his husband, who now seems to realize why he hugged the woman. Kiyoomi detaches himself and shrugs, discreetly wiping a stray tear from the corner of his eye, “Not necessarily. Rather, I was thanking her.” He faces Mieko and continues, his words sincere, “You paved the way so Atsumu could run on it.”
Mieko chuckles at the comparison, unbothered by the underlying meaning of his words. “That is correct. And as I previously said, I will make Atsumu-san report to me when you mess things up. You have quite the talent for making things worse than they already are.” The woman winks at Atsumu and then excuses herself, saying she needs to greet the elderly Sakusa couple.
✉
“Why did you come here? I thought you wanted to catch up with your former teammates?” Kiyoomi asks, kissing his husband on the forehead. Atsumu blushes profusely, still unable to believe he married the man he never failed to annoy. Years of his useless pining seems to have paid off when he decided to flirt and irritate the man, switching modes every week. After a long month, Kiyoomi finally decided to man up, of course Mieko had a hand in this, and asked the blonde out. They dated for six months before becoming official, and Kiyoomi proposed after their first anniversary.
“I jus’ wanted ta know why ya hugged Akiyama-san,” he huffs, jutting his lips into a pout. Kiyoomi smiles, admiring how cute his husband is. “Don’t be jealous, Atsu,” hearing his nickname roll from Kiyoomi’s lips makes Atsumu swoon. He clutches his heart and closes his eyes, his other hand pushing Kiyoomi away, “Stop that Omi Omi! Yer killin’ me ‘ere!” The taller guy chuckles, pulling Atsumu closer to him and pressing a chaste kiss on the blonde’s lips.
From the other side of the room, Mieko happens to stumble upon that sight. She breaks into a wide smile, almost a grin, and tears start to fall from her eyes. “Dear, are you alright?” the elderly couple asks her, concern written on their faces. She lets out a chuckle, “I am fine, Aunt. Rather, I feel great.”
The couple looks at the woman they once considered to be Kiyoomi’s future spouse. Just like their son, they also feel at fault for the burden they placed on her shoulders when she was younger. If Mieko told them she couldn’t bear with it anymore, they would’ve let her go, but she didn’t. She stayed and helped Kiyoomi without asking for some sort of compensation.
Kiyoomi’s father places his hand on the woman’s shoulder, his eyes full of guilt. “Please don’t apologize, Uncle. I merely did my part and I am satisfied with its result, even if it didn’t go the way you planned it to be,” Mieko reassures him, already knowing what he’ll say before the elder can speak. She turns her gaze back to the newlyweds, their hands intertwining as they walk towards their group. “It is my pleasure to witness this side of Kiyoomi,” Mieko says and reaches for another glass of her previous drink.
“Good evening Mom, Dad,” Kiyoomi greets his parents, nodding to them and Atsumu doing the same. “Are you having a great time?” the elderly couple nods, their eyes flashing with glee as they eye how their son interacts with his husband.
“I must say that I am grateful you invited Mieko, Atsumu.” Surprised at the sudden call of his name, Atsumu sputters, “No, no, I did nothin’. T’was all Akiyama-san.”
“No Atsumu-san, I sincerely thank you,” Mieko replies with a smile. “If it wasn’t for you, I wouldn’t have seen Kiyoomi smile. It was pure entertainment,” she continues as Kiyoomi’s parents excuse themselves, striking a conversation with Motoya’s parents.
There is a moment of silence before Mieko turns to Kiyoomi, slowly uttering the words she’d always wanted to say, “I am proud of you, Kiyoomi.” Tears start streaming down Kiyoomi’s face and Atsumu hurriedly grabs a handkerchief, snickering as he wipes his husband’s cheeks.
Mieko laughs, patting her Kiyoomi’s back. “Stop crying Kiyoomi. Not when I finally got to see you smile,” she beams, her eyes closed and her lips form a toothy grin, one that Kiyoomi never got to see on her face.
“Me too. This is the first time I got to see you smile like that,” Kiyoomi croaks in between sniffles. Atsumu also breaks into a smile, marvelled at the sight of them throwing compliments at each other.
The woman shrugs, replying, “Things have been going well on my side. My career is taking off, I have a loving family and I am here at your wedding. I could never ask for anything more.” As she finishes her piece, the newlyweds freeze.
“Loving family? You got married?”
“You’re married, Akiyama-san?”
Amused, Mieko nods and breaks into another grin. “Yes, I assume you already know who he is,” she waves to someone behind the two and they gradually turn.
“So you’ve met my wife, Sakusa-kun and Atsumu.” The blonde’s jaw drops and Kiyoomi’s eyes widen, clearly not expecting who the woman’s husband is.
“Mei-” Atsumu nearly yells but stops, feeling Kiyoomi’s glare boring holes on the side of his head. He lowers his voice and tries again, “Meian-san?”
“Yes, Meian Shuugo is my husband. Is it really that surprising?” the woman asks, hooking her arms with Shuugo’s. Atsumu shakes his head, “No, it’s jus’... I didn’t even know ya got married, Meian-san.” Kiyoomi nods, sharing the same sentiment.
“We got married two years ago, after Mieko finished college. Only a handful of people were invited and it was all private.” Mieko nods, agreeing with her husband.
Kiyoomi scrunches his brows, feeling a hint of betrayal as he asks, “Why didn’t you tell me?” The woman jokingly replies, unknowing of the specks of bitterness in her tone, “I would have if you hadn’t chosen to avoid me like the plague.”
Her statement hit Kiyoomi, hard and gut-wrenching. He retracts his gaze, feeling shame and self-loathing creeping up on him. He has forgotten why he avoided her. Was it the guilt? Or was he afraid of what she might say, and he knows that everything she says holds meaning and truth? His hand squeezes Atsumu’s, and the latter knows what he’s trying to convey.
“Well uh…” Atsumu says before noticing a small bump on the woman’s stomach. His eyes light up, eager to ask about it. “Are ya expecting, Akiyama-san?” Just like that, the atmosphere between them changes, as if the previous conversation didn’t happen. Mieko laughs, albeit a little nervous. “Yes, it has been four months,” she smiles and rests her head on Shuugo’s arm.
After hearing the news, Kiyoomi instantly feels better, his eyes twinkling with interest. “Congratulations, Mieko,” he blurts out, sincerity dripping from his words. Mieko grins, her eyes closing shut, “Thank you, Kiyoomi. Congratulations too.”
Shuugo then excuses himself, seeing his teammates about to wreak havoc near the buffet table. Osamu calls for Atsumu and only the two remain, silence enveloping them.
“Kiyoomi,” Mieko starts, making the man whip his head in her direction. “Please don’t feel bad for me.” Kiyoomi stares, blank and puzzled. “I have known you for a long time. I know you still feel guilty for what happened but please… Don’t beat yourself up.”
Mieko sighs, her fourth drink in hand. She looks at the man beside her, her eyes boring straight into his own, “You need to let yourself live, to love the things you have always deserved.” Kiyoomi nods, still absorbing the words she said. Mieko places her glass beside her and holds Kiyoomi’s arms, “Remember, before everything else happened, I was your sister and I still am. Before I caught feelings for you, I helped you assemble your Legos and train tracks. Before we broke up, I was your first friend besides Motoya. If it helps to make you feel less guilty, just remember that I was your friend, nothing more. Okay, Kiyoomi?” He nods as his tears trickle down, dropping his head onto her shoulder and sobbing silently.
“Thank you for everything, Miko-nee. I wouldn’t have gotten this far without your help. I couldn’t have been this free if you hadn’t talked to my parents,” he pauses for a second. “I wouldn’t have the courage to ask out Atsu if you hadn’t encouraged me and for that, I am eternally grateful to have had you in my life.” Mieko pats his back, comforting him with occasional mumbles of ‘it’s okay’ and ‘you did great’ .
“You’re even more emotional than I am, Kiyoomi. I wonder who’s the pregnant one here,” Mieko jokes, earning a harmless glare from Kiyoomi. He wipes his tears with Atsumu’s handkerchief and smiles, too wide to surprise Mieko.
“That’s better,” Mieko smiles in return, releasing her hold on Kiyoomi’s arms. “After twenty years… Finally, I get to see your true smile.”
✉