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Checking if the gas stove was off, May let out a satisfied hum as she moved around her teas she was going to make tomorrow. She was about to head to bed when she picked up the faint sound of television static in the living room. She went to go investigate.
"Peter! What are you doing up so late?" May asked with her best mom voice, softening her tone at her nephew's startled expression. "You have school tomorrow and that big Spanish test dear."
Peter found the painting in back of his aunt quite more interesting than May's face, which seemed very odd with her. Peter hardly avoids eye contact with her.
"Peter?"
Peter shook out of his stricken state. "Oh. Sorry Aunt May. I'll go to bed now." He gave her a strained smile and quickly turned off the TV, running back to his room and shutting his door. Aunt May sighed sadly as she headed back to her now only seemingly, empty room.
It's only been a week since Ben Parker has been shot and killed, the funeral was only the icing on the cake before it seemed like the Parker household was crashing and failing. May was a strong spirited woman, sure, but there hasn't been a single night since she's cried in her vacant bed and prayed to God that Ben is watching over them in heaven and is doing okay.
"Please Lord. I pray that he's doing marvelous work in heaven.” May sniffed miserably, whispering a bit loudly to get rid of all the silence that lingered in her bedroom. Inhaling the little bit of scent that was reminiscent of Ben, she sobbed quietly as sleep overtook her, her last thought about being about bills, funeral costs or Peter's upcoming graduation, but instead a faint memory of a younger her and younger Ben on the beach together.
A scream was what took her out of her dream. She jolted up and panted, not sure if it was a shriek outside from their neighboring houses, herself or the wind. She looked around and the house seemed quite alright.
A smaller scream or yelp admitted into the air. May’s eyes widened as she trailed the sound that led to Peter's bedroom. Scared out of her mind she jogged as much as her age allowed her too (seriously, and excuse her language, but screw the doctor who advised her not to jog anymore) opened the door quite quickly, turning on the lights and looked for any threats.
"Peter? Peter? Are you okay?" She asked frantically, her eyes landing on her nephew who had a distant look. His eyes were wide with fear and his hair stuck to his forehead. Sweat was trailing down his cheeks as he panted like she did earlier.
May remembered earlier that evening when Peter still had that lost look on him. Figuring there was no threat around, she walked closely, avoiding the mess of electronics, books and scraps of fabric that was on the ground and sat on the bed.
Peter looked less frightened but still a little bit in a trance, not saying anything to answer May’s question. May suddenly mentally berated herself.
Peter had a nightmare and he was scared.
Of course, she wasn't gonna confront him upfront. Peter, being a teenager and all, insists he's made of steel and that nightmares don't affect him at all. Well sometimes, but not to the point of shock. She knew Peter would shut himself down if he seemed vulnerable. He hated being seen like that and well, this week Peter has been very reserved on his emotions ever since Ben passed and even before the time. That was something Ben was trying to work on with Peter ever since he got strangely sick and better the next day.
May shook out of her thoughts and gently held Peter'a face, rubbing a thumb on his sweaty cheek. "Trouble sleeping, dear?"
Peter looked at her with a sad smile and nodded. Visible shakes racked his body contrasting to the sweat. "Yeah. Yeah. Watched some...horror film for English today. Still kind of in my head." He laughed lamely, May finding the laugh he gave a bit too fake. Before she had a say in it her heart clenched when Peter leaned into her touch and nuzzled softly into her calloused hand.
When May only gave him a fond expression, Peter mumbled softly. "I'm okay May. Really. You can go back to sleep."
May, getting the hint that Peter wanted to be alone now, gave him a little peck on the cheek and ruffled his sweat covered hair. Looking around in his room, she found a clean water bottle and handed it to him. She suddenly felt the weight of tiredness on her. Man, when did her legs started feeling like bags of beans? Maybe she shouldn’t have jogged.
"Sweet dreams, kiddo." She left and closed the door after she turned off the lights, May hearing a small goodnight and a sigh of relief on the other side of the door.
Time for sleep.
***
"Aunt May! Aunt May! AUNT MAY!"
May was awoken by careful shoving and not so quiet yelling. She awoken with a startled gasp and looked up to find Peter over her, panting.
"Good heavens Peter! What's going on?" She was still trying to stay awake, not too sure why Peter was up at this, yes, very ungodly hour. 3:00 am to be precise. No really, devils hour!
Unconsciously because of earlier, she was about to fall back asleep before a shout got her up. She looked up to see a wide eyed Peter.
Her breath hitched when she saw his breathing becoming frantic and his face looking paler than normal. The light that was on in the bedroom shown just how frightened he look. He was trying to say something but he couldn't speak in clear sentences.
"Peter, slow down." She begged, not knowing why he was freaking out. She quickly grabbed his hands and held them to her heart. Ben was so much better at comforting Peter than she was. She remembered Ben fishing out Pete’s inhaler when he struggled to breathe. "Breathe after me, sweetheart. Come on, come on. Breathe, kiddo.”
She took exaggerating breaths, not knowing what Ben did with Peter but she figured Peter needed something grounding. Peter let out strangled gasps.
"May. May. May." He kept repeating, his throat tightening. "May.. I cant... please... don't..."
What in heavens happened during the past few hours?
"Follow my breathing, Peter. Big one in. Big one out." She coached again, still internally freaking out and feeling like she was going to have a heart attack. After what seemed like eons, Peter finally calmed down. His breathing was slower.
"Peter? What's going on? Did something happen?" She quickly checked Peter for injuries, noticing how crumbled his t shirt and pajama shorts were. "What's wrong sweetie?"
"I...you were... then..." he started, Peter shook his head, frustratedly unable to convey how he was feeling. He felt pressure in the back of his eyes and he tried to swallow the lump in his throat. He instead ended up choking into a pitiful sob. May’s eyes widened.
Her heart clenched when he looked at her with his crumbled expression. Her motherly instincts kicked in. "Oh sweetheart. Come here." Aunt May quickly moved over on her bed and grabbed Peters arms and helped him onto the bed, as soon as he sat on it he quickly embraced her in a hug, his face crying into her nightgown. The waterworks finally broke.
"Aunt May. May." He wailed and cried on her chest. "Please..I can't...you..don’t…go-“
She couldn't understand anything so far but she needed him to calm down. She gently but firmly wrapped her arms around Peter’s slightly large form and began to rock him back and forth, gently mumbling reassurances by his cheek. She started rubbing his back as haphazard continue to wrack his body and his ran his voice raw.
She swallowed a lump in her throat when Peter clung on like she was going to disappear.
He soon calmed down, she started to feel the wet stain on her gown to where her nephews face was pressed into, only the occasional wet sniffs were the only sounds in the room.
"Pete." She softly said, taking a handful of hair and scratching his scalp slightly. She used Pete for when Peter was miserable, whether he failed a test he worked so hard for or when he used to be younger and scrape his knee on the driveway. "Do you want to tell me what happened?" She asked softly.
Peter sniffed. "N-nightmare."
She nodded slowly, feeling him swallow harshly trying to speak again without breaking down.
"I l-lost you. You died, A-aunt May."
Oh
Of course, Peter had a dream of her dying. Ben just died. As much as she didn't wanna think about it, someday she would leave Peter (not her decision of course) and even though he's practically a young adult it breaks her heart. Sure, he will have Harry and MJ but his bloodline. Gone. No parents, no aunt and uncle. Just Peter.
The thought strung tears in her eyes and she looked at the mop of messy brown hair still tucked in her nightgown. He looked up, his eyes watery and he was biting his lip hard to stop it from wobbling. He looked so young and what scared May the most is his eyes spoke more than what he's ever said. She's afraid there's more to what Peter saw.
"Don't go back to sleep. Please. Please. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm so selfish." Peter begged, his voice wavering dangerously. He put his face back to her shirt, she could hear how small his voice sounded now. "You- you almost, went back to- sleep and- and you wouldn't wake up-
Goodness. Peter was afraid she wasn't going to wake up. Her eyes widened in horror.
Aunt May must have stayed silent more than she thought because Peter started to sob quietly this time.
Now she was very worried. Right now, she needed to assure Peter. She's here right now. If Peter didn't want her to sleep, she wasn't going to. "Oh, sweetie. Peter. I won't. I won't." She reassured him, gently grabbing his face and looking straight into his baby blue eyes. "I won't go to sleep, okay? I won't, I promise."
Seeming relieved and ashamed, Peter gave a small nod. He slowly dismantled himself from her and sat up, giving himself a chance to breathe.
After he calmed down a bit, May noticed his face turn a dark shade of red.
"I'm sorry Aunt May." He muttered, playing with the hem of his crumbled t shirt. "I- I got your gown all wet and gross."
May laughed not unkindly. Her emotionally repressed nephew just broke down and he was worried about her nightgown. "Oh Peter. Don't you worry about it." She smiled fondly when he gave an awkward smile.
They stood in a comfortable silence for a few minutes before Peter broke it.
"I don't really want to go back to sleep." Peter admitted childishly.
"That's quite alright. I wouldn't want to go back to sleep if I was in your shoes." A little lightbulb flickered, May suddenly realized what Peter needed. She got up and pulled a really fuzzy blanket from the closet- a really old baby blue one that used to be Peters favorite when he was younger. She handed it to him and propped a pillow for him. Without words, she gently pushed him to lay down. A remote plopped gently next to him.
"Peter, do you remember watching The Golden Girls before? With me? It was a funny show, I remember you used to laugh along with me even though you didn't understand the jokes." She beamed when she saw his lips slowly curl into an amused smile.
"Uh, haha nope. I don't remember." He slightly frowned when May stepped out of the room. "W-where are you going, Aunt May?"
Aunt May smiled sadly at his shy question. "Well, we can't have a Golden Girls marathon without midnight snacks. We might or might not have some leftover chocolate chip cookies..."
Peter instantly beamed.
"Warm milk?" He asked timidly.
"Would be a crime to have cookies without warm milk, young man." She felt her heart fill with warmth when she heard Peter's small giggle as she left the room to the kitchen.
***
The Golden Girls playing in the background, the sound of chewing and rustling of the blankets were a blessing to Aunt May's ears. For tonight, her ears were not reminded of the sad lingering silence but the loving presence of her nephew.
She watched with careful eyes as Peter laughed at the jokes (he finally understood most of the adult references, bless his heart) he kept his eyes trained on the screen as munched on the cookies. A little part of her wanted to scold him a bit for eating messily on the bed but seeing his eyes cry from laughing rather than upset shut down that idea entirely.
She wasn't sure how she was gonna do this without Ben- she missed him dearly. She knew that it would maybe never or take forever to heal from his passing- both her and Peter. Right now though, as she watched Peter be genuinely happy, his mind hopefully being carefree of any dark thoughts, she realized that she needs to be there for Peter. He was still a kid- even though he was graduating from highschool in a few months, he needs to know he has support, love. Even if he goes live on his own, he's not alone at all.
She shook out her thoughts when she felt a weight pressing on her shoulders. A fond smile appeared on her face as she saw Peter's eyelids droop heavily and he started nodding off.
"Sleepy, sweetheart?" She moved the plate off the bed as she saw him shake his head with a droopy smile. He messily grabbed his cup of warm milk and savored it.
"Nah." He rubbed his eyes and yawned. "M' not sleepy."
"Right, of course not, dear." May laughed as she used her sleeve to wipe the very existent milk mustache on his lip, a giggle coming from the boy.
"You’re a growing boy, Peter. You need at least a few hours of shut eye.”She coaxed gently.
Peter stayed silent for a bit before muttering, “I don’t want to see you die again, Aunt May.”
A little flash of memory appeared , a one year old baby Peter crying in their living room, wailing for his parents who left him in their care. The baby looked absolutely frightened until Ben picked him up and sang until Peter was sleeping soundly.
"You’re scared, Peter.” She looked him directly in the eyes. “It's okay to be, you know.” She turned off the lamp but kept the TV on. She gently brought the blanket up to his chin and started gently massaging his head, going through his soft sandy brown hair. He instantly leaned into the touch, his eyes feeling heavier by the second. "I'm scared too, you know." Peter let out a confused noise.
"You are?"
"Yes. But it's okay to be. Because I know I have you and you have me." She let out a small chuckle and looked up. "We also have Ben watching out for us too. You know, he would have lost his marbles if he saw you eating cookies this late at night. You used to be a super very hyperactive little baby boy whenever you ate any assortment of chocolate.” She pinched his cheeks gently, receiving an embarrassed whine in return.
“Still are, it seems.” She cheekily smiled.
"Mayyyy." Peter turned red as he laughed. “I’m not a baby!”
She hummed absentmindedly as Peter let out an amused scoff. He started muttering about how he was practically an adult and the curse of having a pinchable baby face.
Peter was still fighting to keep his eyelids open unfortunately. May knew exactly what to do now. She started to hum again, this time to one of her favorite songs. She gradually started to sing.
Let me call you sweetheart
I'm in love with you
Let me hear you whisper
That you love me too
Peter's eyes looked up sleepily in surprise. He's heard May sing about once or twice. But to him was different. It was soothing and he was far tired from being embarrassed for having to be sung to sleep. He leaned in closer to May and let out a contented sigh when she kept ruffling his hair. He felt…safe.
Keep the love light glowing
In your eyes so true
Let me call you sweetheart
I'm in love with you
She continued to sing quietly until Peter finally gave in and entered the world of sleep. His hand absentmindedly unclenched from her nightgown again and he started breathing more slowly. She saw tiny smile was present on his face.
She pressed a small kiss on his forehead, moving a bit of his hair out of his eyes. Her little boy, well, Ben’s as well, was all she has left now in this world. "Sleep well, sweetheart."
She will have to call the school tomorrow, tell them that Peter is sick and let him rest. Lord knows that he's tired, he's not doing okay and he needs rest. He’s been through a lot this week. They both have.
But she will deal with that in a few hours. For now, all that matters is that the gas stove is off, Peter is sleeping soundly without nightmares next to her, and that Ben is watching over them with a proud smile on his face.