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"I'm retired," Kakashi said, with the flat affect of someone who was tired of explaining himself. "I'm a full-time househusband and the only thing I'm mastering anymore is knitting."
The usual kunai pouch on his thigh snapped open to show off two knitting needles and the bundle of yarn that constituted what could only be his latest project. It was a garish sunset orange and neon lemon ombré number. Kakashi looked rather pleased with himself. He held it up, and it turn on the shape of a tiny bootie.
"It's for Shiba." He said, rotating it in the air, as if that explained everything.
The other Kakashi in the room narrowed his eye. If it was in contemplation or confusion on how he was alive and knitting in the future, no one was sure. His fingers twitched lightly and he watched the other Kakashi (who had two! two dark gray eyes) carefully tuck the half completed dog bootie back into his kunai pouch. A subtle glint betrayed that he still had two kunai for all that he said he was retired.
Sakura laughed politely, flickering her eyes back and forth between her sensei and the older, more tired sensei standing in the middle of the room. Old Kakashi winked at her while Current Kakashi looked back at the scroll that started this. Naruto made a loud frustrated noise because he'd been needling the strange version of their sensei on information from where or when he was in time.
"Househusband?" Sakura asked.
Old Kakashi nodded happily. "Got to help the husband anyway I can. It's a busy life. So many things to make, things to bake, you know how it is."
Ugh, it was unfair that Old Kakashi wasn’t even old. He was older than their current Kakashi sure, but he looked exactly the same except for the eye. Sakura tried to find even some crow’s feet but couldn’t see any. It was criminal. She better look half as good when she got that old.
The visitor paused, hummed, and said, “For what it’s worth I don’t remember ever meeting a future version of myself, so this is probably an alternate universe issue. I’d be willing to look at the scroll if you wanted.”
Their Kakashi unrolled the scroll onto the table he was sitting next to and explained that they had opened the scroll during a struggle, and Naruto had set it off. Said blonde haired boy squawked in outrage for being blamed even though he had tried to grab the scroll out of Sakura’s grasp.
Old Kakashi went over to mull over the puzzling jutsu that had caused this mess. Seeing two Kakashi’s together was at once foreboding and comical, the two gray haired shinobi disagreeing over how the jutsu worked and the best way to undo it.
“Ne, ne, by the way,” Naruto started, “Who’s your husband anyway?”
“Am I not dating anyone here?” Old Kakashi mused. “Though you guys probably wouldn’t know.” He looked at them contemplatively. He snapped his fingers. “I’ve decided…”
Both teens leaned forward in suspense.
“… not to tell you.” Old Kakashi gave them two matching eye smiles. “Teamwork exercises never end. Think of it as an opportunity.”
He was still infuriating! Naruto grabbed at his hair and Sakura smacked his hands to stop him from ripping any hair out. Old Kakashi watched them with an indulgent look, something that Kakashi could tell but was sure flew over the heads of the two teens.
Naruto made a gagging noise, “Ugh it better not be Bushier-brow-sensei! It was bad enough having to see him carry you back from Suna!”
A fist hit him on the back of his head, courtesy of Sakura. “Naruto! Stop being rude!”
“Maa,” the gray-haired retiree said, “No, not Gai. You can say I’m getting softer since stopping missions, so I’ll give you two a hint. Think closer to home.”
Content to let the two ninja argue between themselves about the identity of his mysterious lover, Kakashi turned back to his younger self.
“I know you’re probably curious about the eye, but I know you understand that I can’t tell you.” He said, fully expecting the understanding nod that he got back.
With that, they resettled to figure out the counter of the jutsu. Thankfully with the two of them, they were able to puzzle through it more or less efficiently now that Naruto and Sakura were now determined to solve the new puzzle given to them.
“I’d have to disagree with you, clearly Ram would be the next in the sequence instead of Snake.”
Old Kakashi made the hand signs as he spoke, felt his chakra fueling something and turned so that he could see everyone. He waved and called, “You still never saw my face.”
He popped out of existence with a puff of smoke and the groans of Naruto.