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All Might, safe to say, was absolutely fucked.
Not only did 2 of the 3 boys have to find out about the university fuck fiesta through a picture, but he fucked his successors parents. Not to mention that Bakugou wouldn’t be part of the “Hey let's kill All Might” riot if he hadn’t said anything about the boy's parents also being there.
Running from the incoming attacks of the 3 students would be impossible for the man to do in his current skeleton-like form, so the best thing for him to do was pray that Aizawa would walk through that door within the next 5 seconds. With all the noise and commotion the boys are making, and how Aizawa absolutely hates it when that happens, he figures that he would be rescued at least after each boy got a good punch in, maybe the occasional stab. This was absolutely the worst situation he’s ever had to deal with, and he once had to climb through a 30 year old, uncleaned sewer in order to find someone's apartment key.
The pure power emitting from each boy was about enough to kill every single person in the room if they wanted to, but yet all they could think about was beating the shit out of the guy who slept with their parents, even if it was over 17 years ago. Izuku was so close to landing a good Full Cowling onto the science dummy of a teacher before his quirk was effectively erased and he couldn’t move his body.
There at the doorway, filled with silent rage and wearing a...pink maid costume with...realistic cat ears what the fu-
There stood the caterpillar man himself, Aizawa Shota, who did not look like he had enough coffee to even whisper about the fucks he didn’t give that day. The only boy who was able to land a hit before they were incapacitated as well was Bakugou, but even then it was simply a small graze of his ring finger on the tip of All Might’s nose, which due to how sharp that mother fucker is, it ended up slicing a good bit of the young gremlins finger.
“I don’t want a single word out of the 3 of you until I ask this one question, and if it’s anything about my outfit I will curbstomp you back into the crack of hell you crawled out of. Now what in the gods’ names did you think you were doing to All Might huh?” Aizawa glared into the souls of each boy who sat in his capture weapon, clearly not drunk enough for this conversation, albeit 2 in the afternoon.
With a single nod, each boy took a deep breath in and spoke in unison (which is very creepy for them).
“He fucked our parents, and took a picture of it.”
“...what..?”
“Sensei” Shouto started, “I understand that in normal circumstances attacking him would be completely out of the ordinary and wrong for us to do. But consider the fact that we not only found out while on internship, but we had to look at that fucking photo because they thought it was a good idea to even take one, and then share it amongst themselves to just keep forever in yearbooks.”
Katsuki spoke up after. “Listen Old Man, this guy literally had sex with our parents and you expect us NOT to act out irrational. This man has been teaching us for 3 years and only NOW do we find out that not only was he somewhere involved in our parents' lives, but he fucked ALL of them AT THE SAME TIME!?”
Izuku spoke last. “Sensei, I respect you entirely and you’ve done more for me than my actual father has, but if you don’t let me out of this god damn capture weapon within the next 30 seconds I’m going to just chew my way out to get to him and I fucking mean it”
While this rant session was going on between the 3 victims and their teacher, what all 5 participants failed to remember was that they were in fact in the dorms common room. Meaning that the rest of the entire class was there with blatant shock on all of their faces. Besides Jiro, because she obviously knew the situation. The class shared one emotion at this current time, and that was utter distress. The distress of knowing not only did these boys just try to fucking disintegrate their retired hero teacher, but they tried to do so because he slept with their parents.
“I don’t think they can hear us in their little tantrum world over there but I’m just going to state that I already knew of this situation because I, unfortunately, was there when the picture was discovered by Katsudon and Shotoroni.” Kyoka stated to the rest of the class, which prompted half the class who started to recover from the shock to be put into an even deeper state of shock and new state of worry.
“You mean to tell me that there was a picture of this fucking thing at Endeavor’s agency. Just chilling there in his office. And you guys saw it.” Sero asked, voice faintly cracking at every vowel as he too attempted to reach out to the strings of understatement of the situation.
Kyoka nodded and continued to watch the madness unfold as Izuku did exactly what he promised and started to chew his way out of the capture scarf, which didn’t gather anyone's attention until it actually started to work.
Now we move to our current situation, where the boys gather in Shouto’s room and cry while planning on how to make All Might’s life a living hell. A knock on the door disrupted the wailing of the trauma trio and prompted Shouto to walk to the door and open it. On the other side of the door was literally all of Class A.
“Heyyyy…..so uh.. Do you guys wanna come downstairs for some bonding time..? I know it’s probably a bad time to ask but we felt you guys could use some..cheering up?” Shoji asked. The masked student could be seen (kinda) with a worried and hesitant expression on his...eyes?
Silence ensued for a few seconds…
“..We’ll be down at 5” Bakugou said from behind the door, and Shoji nodded at the response, prompting the rest of the class to disperse in order to prepare for a comfortable bonding night. At least as comfortable as they can be.
“Hey guys, before we go down to join them, I think we need to have a quick..talk.”Izuku mumbled, clearly still in and out of reality as his voice was so spaced and airy. He continued, “Maybe we should talk to our parents about this, I mean it’s probably the only way we will ever be able to look them in the eyes again after this so, why don’t we just have dinner and talk it out?”
The suggestion made all 3 boys shudder in anti-social dread, even the idea of confrontation with their parents made them want to crawl back into a closet and never come out.
“I suppose it would be best, after all Izu has a point. If we want to ever be able to look at our parents, like ever again, we need to talk about this. Together preferably because there is no way I’m going to be able to have two separate conversations with each of my parents about this.” Shouto said. His input was more of a request than anything.
“I second that Half n’ Half, my parents didn’t even give me the proper ‘talk’, ain’t no way in hell I’m gonna talk to them about this shit by myself. My old man will have a heart attack at the mere mention of it if we’re alone.” Bakugou growled.
Izuku sighed. “So it’s settled then. We talk to them together. This’ll be a dream. For now, let’s just go cuddle with the others, I know they’re 2 minutes away from sending Tsu up here to drag us down the stairs.”
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Ring
Ring
Ring
“Hello...is this the Midoriya residence?”
“Yes it is. How can I help you?”
“Is this...Inko?”
“...yes, now who are you and what can I do for you?”
“Hello dearest, been a while hasn’t it. Have the stars shifted?”
“....”
“My dear?”
“...Hisashi?”
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Saturday was the day of the dinner discussion, and it’s clear as day that none of the boys nor parents want to have this talk. However, what's done must be done, and so forth.
Katsuki sat in his room, mentally preparing himself for the traumatizing conversation he is about to have with his parents, his Aunties, and the past and present #1 hero. Obviously, it doesn’t work too well, seeing as he is still panicking when he walks out the door, hops into the car and drives over to the Midoriya’s, who have offered to host the...special...event.
They always lived close to each other, so the drive was less than 5 minutes, they could have walked but the Bakugou family wouldn’t be able to handle the silence knowing damn well what the near future would hold for them.
Knock Knock
Inko Midoriya opens the door with the most forced smile she could summon and welcomes in the Bakugou household. While walking in Katsuki saw that the Todoroki Family had arrived earlier, no one looked pleased to be here.
After a non-existent greeting towards everyone, they all sat down at the (newly bought) dinner table and began to feast, that is until Inko started talking.
“Well, before we get started, I do have a small surprise that was definitely...unexpected.” Inko said, breaking the loud silence, "However as much as I wanted this surprise to happen in more personnel and planned circumstances...I’d like you all to meet my husband Hisashi, who decided to join us for this..talk.”
When I tell you this man had the most dramatic entrance he could (with his limited eyesight) Hisashi Midoriya opened a door down the hall from the kitchen, and strutted his way to the dinning room like he beat the Vashta Narada themselves. And as surprised as most guests in the room were, there was one guest who knew exactly what needed to be done.
“ALL FOR ONE?!?! YOU’RE YOUNG MIDORIYA’S FATHER?!” All Might shouted.
“YOU’RE FUCKING MY WIFE?!” All For One shouted back.
“WAIT, FUCKING AS IN CURRENT AND STILL HAPPENING?! YOU’RE FUCKING MY MOM ALL MIGHT?!” Izuku shouted from the corner of the table.
“OKAY, let’s unpack this from the start.” Katsuki yelled, "First of all, THAT GUY is All For One?! Second of all, All For One you’re uncle Hisashi?! Third of all, All Might YOU’RE FUCKING AUNTY INKO?!”
“Yes.”
“Yes.”
“...Yes..”
“I’m going to fucking cry” Izuku whispered shakily, not only did this boy see his father for the first time in 17 years, but his father is not only the biggest villain of all time, but he’s the biggest villain of all time who’s married to his MOM.
“I think it’s best we start from the beginning of the university story, then we can move on to uh….Do I call you All For One or Hisashi?” Rei spoke up from her seat next to Shouto.
“Please call me Hisashi, it makes it sound like I’m a normal man,” AFO replied.
.
.
.
.
.
.
“Alright I’ll start the story, since it was basically my idea anyway” Mitsuki broke the silence. “Mom whAt-”
“HUsh brat mama’s speaking. Anyways, back in our university days, me and Inko decided to go to this frat party that was being thrown not too far away from our shared apartment. Rei was an old friend of Inko’s and when I was introduced we obviously hit it off. This was about a few weeks before Rei got married off to Mr.Bastard on the left.”
“Rude.”
“Don’t interrupt me Enji, anyways I call up Masaru and Inko calls up Hisashi because we wanted dates to protect us. While they went to get us drinks some punk assholes tried hitting on us and out of the blue here came the baby blue eye duo with our dates and rescued us from the assholes. Turns out not too long before that those guys had knocked into them on their way over to us and didn’t give off a good vibe for them to allow these guys to live. We introduce ourselves, they say they’re from the hero course, yada yada yada boring meet and greet stuff happens.”
Rei coughed to get Mitsuki’s attention, “If I may, I’d like to continue on from that point of the story.”
“Oh absolutely you can Rei, I love when you tell stories. “Mitsuki winked and blew a kiss at Rei. Shoto choked on his spaghetti from that and Katsuki shed a tear.
“So after we had met and hung out with the boys, Masaru and Hisashi got really interested in the other two and had basically started making out with All Might and Enji in front of us, which then led to me, Inko and Mitsuki to start making out too. Eventually we had all found a room that Enji had in the house, and from there we all continued on with...specific events. It was a while too, like we spent maybe 10 or 12 hours in that room before we-”
“Mama, Mama, I think that’s enough details for now.” Shouto interrupted, the pain on his face clearer than his left eye’s vision, the same for Izuku and Katsuki too. Izuku looks like he just came out of a war and Katsuki is 5 seconds away from purposely blowing out his ear drums.
“Right right, apologies kids, anyways Inko would you like to finish the story?” She asked.
“Oh I’d love too sweetheart.” Inko whispered, again, waay too flirtatiously for any of the boys to feel sane at this point. Izuku cracked his water glass and Shouto damn near stabbed himself with an icicle
“Anyways after that night came, many, many more before me and the girls decided to continue focusing on school and the boys went their separate ways as well. Eventually Rei left to go be with her arranged husband who happened to be Enji, I got married to Hisashi and Mitsuki and Masaru got married. We didn’t get to see Rei a lot for obvious reasons but when we did we made sure to...make up for lost time.”
“And that we did” Mitsuki smirked as she winked at Inko. Izuku broke his glass of water and Katsuki almost burned a hole in his leg.
“So.... depending on how long you guys were fucking-”
“Izuku Language-”
“Shut the fuck up you burnt potato. As I was saying, since you guys were and have been fucking for a while, and going off on how long ago all of you got married, how can any of us be sure of who our fathers are? We all take after our mothers in looks.” Izuku questions.
“...Holy shit the boy is right.” Endeavor whispers.
“Enji-”
“Nono Rei he has a point, it’s been a while and the only times there have been risks of that are when...Toya and Shouto were born-”
All hell broke loose.
“You guys have been fucking long enough to where there is a chance of us being BROTHERS?!” Katsuki yelled.
“OH Y A Y MORE TRAUMATIZED BROTHERS THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT I WANTED” Shouto screeched.
“I am going to RIP OUT YOUR SPLEENS YOU OLD MEN.” Izuku roared.
“N-now boys let’s just talk about this-” Masaru tried.
“Be quiet you mother fucker”
.
.
.
“I mean technically everyone here besides you three IS a mother fucker-” All For One didn’t even get to finish speaking before the table blew up and all 3 boys jumped out of a window, running back to the dorms and praying to every god that they are not brothers.
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“...Well I think that went well-”
“Inko...your table became part of your ceiling, now we have to get paternity tests done for the boy’s sakes” Mitsuki grumbled.
“I mean, it’d also be for our sake as well because Izuku did have a point. All 3 boys take after their mothers.” Rei spoke up.
“But doesn’t Shouto have Endeavour's blue eye?”
“His grandma on my side has blue eyes so there’s a chance he could’ve gotten that, or again, it could be toshinori because he has the same blue.”
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.
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“So does this mean that until we get the tests I don’t have to be arrested??” AFO asks.
“Hisahi dear, at this point we just need to process the fact that you're still alive first before we get to the whole dad thing.”
“Fair enough”