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The little boat sliced its way across the pre-dawn waters of the lake, its forward movement being the only thing to send ripples across the surface. A pair of oars dipped in, piercing the mist just above the water, then re-emerging only to do so again.
Ezra Fell sat on one end of the boat, idly watching the shore drift further and further away. Across from him on the opposite end (and manning the oars) was his long-time partner, Anthony J. Crowley. Crowley grunted and gave another heave of the oars, and Ezra found his thoughts wandering to the storied history the pair shared with the icy lake.
It was the first place they’d ever disposed of a body together, after all.
He stretched out his legs, accidentally knocking against the heavy trunk between them and he jerked his foot back with a grunt of annoyance.
“For Heaven’s sake, why did you bring me out here at this ungodly hour?” he huffed with a petulant cross of his arms. “If this is some sort of picnic, I fail to see the appeal.”
“Oi, I said it was a surprise, didn’t I? That means I can’t tell you yet. It also means no complaining,” Crowley retorted.
Ezra muttered mutinously, but remained silent, opting to watch his breath rise in visible puffs of vapor in front of his face. After a few more moments of silence, punctuated only by Crowley’s occasional grunt of exertion, the boat’s movement slowly came to a stop. Ezra looked around. They were at the dead center of the lake, with the shore being much too far to swim to. His smile quirked up a little at the corners.
“My, my… seems you’ve finally taken the chance to do away with me where there are no witnesses,” he snarked.
“Har har har. No. That’s not why I brought you here. I promised a romantic boat ride, didn’t I?”
“Yes, but—”
“Close your eyes.”
He blinked once in surprise.
“Pardon?”
“I said: close your eyes. It’s time for your surprise.”
Ezra couldn’t stop the giddy thrill, despite himself. As odd as the setting and the timing were, he trusted Crowley completely. If he said that there was a surprise forthcoming, then Ezra was darn well going to do what he said. He gave his partner one last besotted smile before straightening his posture, folding his hands in his lap, and closing his eyes. He even puckered his lips a little, expecting a sweet kiss.
Instead, he heard the sound of buckles being unclasped and the trunk’s lid creaking open. He craned his eyes open a little, but the trunk’s lid was immediately slammed shut and Crowley was there in front of him, amber eyes flashing in annoyance. “Oi! What’d I say about keeping your eyes closed?”
Ezra tittered.
“Terribly sorry, darling. It won’t happen again.”
“Yeah, it’d better not,” Crowley growled in reply and it sent a thrill up Ezra’s spine. He loved it when Crowley’s voice dropped into a low, husky timbre; either from annoyance or from… other activities.
Before Ezra could get carried away, he let his eyes fall shut again and this time kept them shut. He could hear Crowley stumbling back towards the trunk and wrenching the lid open again. There then came the sound of exerted grunts, then something being dragged over the side of the boat. Ezra was sorely tempted to open his eyes for a second time, but the boat suddenly lurched, followed by a splash, and he yelped in surprise and clung to the sides.
“Anthony Crowley just what on Earth are you doing?!” he shrieked. “You’d better not have fallen over or so help me—”
A pair of familiar hands came to rest on his shoulders and gently turned him sideways. When Crowley spoke again, his voice was right next to his ear.
“Alright, angel, you can open your eyes now.”
Ezra did.
Then he looked into the water.
A corpse stared back at him.
The body was that of a man, broad-shouldered and naked save for a pair of plain slacks. It looked to have been recently exsanguinated, with chalk-grey skin and eyes that stared blankly up at the sky as it bobbed atop the surface of the lake. On its chest, written in red spray paint, were the words: I Luv U
Ezra opened his mouth, closed it, then opened it again, producing a series of choked-off consonants. While not the first corpse he had seen, it was still a jarring sight considering he’d been hoping for something much more pleasant. It certainly explained the trunk, at least. When he turned to Crowley, whether to scold him for making a mess or to ask him what was going on (he was still on the fence about it), he saw Crowley kneeling on the damp floor of the boat, holding a ring box aloft.
“Ezra, my angel, I brought you here to ask you a very important question… will you marry—”
He never got to finish his proposal.
With a strangled screech of outrage, Ezra shoved him as hard as he could off the edge of the boat and into the water.
“Have you lost your mind?!” Ezra shouted at Crowley when he re-emerged with a sputter. “That is how you ask me to marry you?! Where’s the romance?! You just- just- just painted a corpse!”
“I thought it was pretty romantic,” Crowley muttered petulantly as he tread water. “ ’S where we first met after all…” Suddenly, his eyes went wide. He swam in a circle, looking around desperately. “Oh… oh fuck! I dropped the ring! Shit!”
He gulped down a breath and dove back under the water, rocking the boat slightly. Ezra leaned over the side, glaring at the grey-green waters.
“Get back up here this instant!” he shouted. “It’s got to be freezing in there! If you get hypothermia, I won’t be responsible for chopping off your toes!” His words were met with only the return of his own echo. Crowley didn’t surface, and one by one the ripples petered out. Ezra’s fingers drummed nervously on the edge of the boat. “I… I’m serious, mister!”
Silence and stillness.
Something thumped against the side of the boat and Ezra whirled around, expecting to see his love’s face grinning awkwardly up at him from the water. But no, it was just the corpse again. Mocking him, no doubt. He turned back to where he’d watched Crowley dive, but the other man still wasn’t forthcoming, and Ezra was beginning to worry.
He’d always been a bit of an anxious sort when it came to Crowley. The man had a very dangerous job after all, and it only took one misplaced bullet, one errant knife graze, one slip for everything to go disastrously wrong.
Ezra could feel his heart pounding. He was certain that, if he opened his shirt, he’d be able to see it thumping clear out of his chest.
“C-Crowley?”
A few bubbles rose to the surface and popped, but the lake remained still.
“Anthony!!”
Ezra had never been much of a swimmer in his own right, but that mattered very little in the moment. He wobbled to his feet as the boat rocked a little beneath him, and he quickly dove over the side and into the water, fully intent on rescuing his idiot of a lover.
His entry was clumsy, and he flopped more than dove, but it got the job done and the water closed around his head.
A beat of silence.
Two.
Then three.
Finally, two heads erupted from the water, gasping for breath. Crowley held Ezra tight to his side with one hand while his other one held aloft a gleaming ring.
“Ha! Yes! Knew I’d find it!” he cackled triumphantly. He glanced down at Ezra, who was shivering and clinging to him for warmth, coughing up spurts of muddy water. “Yeesh, whadja jump in after me for? You know you can’t swim.”
“Y-y-you… you… you absolute arse!” Ezra smacked Crowley’s chest. “You scared me half to death, you know that?! I thought you’d drowned!”
Crowley shook his head, spraying flecks of water.
“Nah. ‘M fine. You on the other hand…”
Ezra’s body gave another violent shiver and he hugged Crowley tighter.
“I couldn’t lose you,” he said around the chattering of his teeth.
“I take it that’s a yes to my proposal, then?”
“Not the way I would have asked, but… yes. Yes, Crowley. I’ll marry you.”
Crowley grinned widely and, though it took a bit of maneuvering to do so without letting go of Ezra, he managed to slip the band around his ring finger. Ezra held his hand up to admire the craftsmanship. It was a simple silver band with a single white gemstone that he couldn’t recognize set into the middle. It caught the dawn light beautifully, like a single star taken from the heavens and brought to earth just for him.
He twisted in Crowley’s hold and seized both sides of the other man’s damp face to bring their lips together in a joyous kiss. Crowley’s mouth tasted like dirty pond water, and he smelled just as bad, but the warmth of their first kiss as official fiancés had the worst of the chill leaking from Ezra’s bones. When they broke the kiss, Crowley smiled at him, love-drunk and stupid with joy.
“Thank you, angel. I promise, I’ll make you so happy! You’ll- you’ll forget there was ever a point in your life when you were sad!” Crowley kissed him again, but quickly pulled away when Ezra shivered once more. “Come on. Let’s get you out of… here…”
As one, they both turned towards the shore. Without anyone manning the oars, the boat had lazily started drifting away and was now out of reach unless they intended to swim after it. Ezra groaned and thumped his forehead against Crowley’s shoulder.
“Oh for goodness’ sake…”
Crowley chuckled, already assuming the position for a freestyle paddle.
“Hold onto me. I’ll get us there.” Ezra did, wrapping his arms around Crowley’s neck and aiding him with clumsy kicks of his much-shorter legs. His fiancé smirked and said, “Don’t let go, now. I’d hate to have to rescue you again.”
Ezra grumbled and hid his face in Crowley’s neck by way of reply.
THE END
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