Chapter Text
Nine year old Killian hated that little girl. She always wanted to play with the boys, but she didn’t understand that she was just way too young to be playing with them. And besides, she was a 4-year old girl! Which boy wanted to play with Barbies or play dress-up with a 4 year old girl?!
“Killi, please play with me. I’ll love you forever,” Emma said as she jumped on Killian’s bed at the foster home. She gave him a big puppy dog face thinking that he’d fall for it, like everyone else did. But he knew better and plus he hated it when she called him “Killi”. So, Killian shoved Emma off his bed and kept reading his favourite book, Peter Pan.
“Get off you rugrat. I’m busy; I don’t have time for you.”
Emma landed on the floor with a big thud, and immediately started crying.
“Killian, that’s it! You are not going out to play today. You have homework to do, give me your book” Cathy exclaimed while running into the room and scooping Emma up. Cathy was the daughter of the foster care centre’s owner. But she always helped take care of the kids and helped with their homework. She was a wonderful girl in her early 20s, and the favourite of all the kids.
Killian was mad. He knew Emma was crying just to get him in trouble because he didn’t want to play with her. But just like always, he was the one who had to give up his book and pretend to do homework that he had already finished. He was so sick and tired of Emma always getting her way.
“Emma, I hate you. I hope you never get adopted and ruin another kid’s life!” Killian yelled at the crying girl.
“Killian, you don’t mean that. Apologise right now. You know Emma loves you like a brother, you know she looks up to you. You’re the only one who’s stayed constant in her 3 years since she came to this foster home. Hush Emma, he didn’t mean it. He loves you too. He’s just upset right now. No need to cry.” Cathy kept trying to calm Emma down, who had started crying even more, and took Emma back to her room.
Killian lay back onto his bed. He knew in his heart that he didn’t mean what he had said to Emma, but ever since she learned how to talk and walk, she was always following him and bothering him to play with her. Killian wished again for the millionth time in his 4 years of staying at the foster home that someone would adopt him, and that he could finally leave this place.
Killian didn’t see Emma for 2 days, which he was glad for because it meant she was doing her own thing and not bothering him. On this Monday morning, Killian was very late. All his friends already had their breakfast and had already gone to school so they could play before being forced to learn something. Killian was just grabbing his bag and heading to the kitchen when Cathy came into his room with a huge smile on her face.
“Killian you will never believe the news I have for you.”
“Let me guess, the little rugrat is finally gone from my life. That would be good news.”
“Oh Killian, you don’t mean that. But I guess in a way you are right. Although it’s not Emma that will be gone from your life, you will be gone from hers.”
Killian didn’t want to get his hopes up, especially after what happened the last time, but he couldn’t help asking. “Cathy, are you saying what I think you’re saying? Am I getting adopted?” he whispered soflty.
“Yes Killian, the Jones family has already signed the preliminary paperwork. If everything is a good fit after 3 months you legally become their child. You get to go home with them today.” Killian was stunned. The last time there was a chance of this happening, the family backed out at the last minute. He didn’t even realize Cathy was still talking to him; he was so lost in his thoughts. “They will be here at 12 to pick you up. So, no school for you today. We have to get you all packed up and ready to go. But that also means you won’t get a chance to say bye to any of your friends.”
“What?! I have to say bye. There’s Tommy and Jessie. Oh and I can’t forget about Billy. I have to say bye to them. I play with them every day. And they all already went to school. Maybe I can come back and visit them, eh Cathy? That would be ok right? You don’t mind do you?”
“Oh Killian honey, I would love it if you came back to visit. But I’m so sorry; I don’t think you’ll be able to see those boys again. The family that’s taking you, they live in Boston, and you know how far Boston is from here. I think you should write the boys some letters if you want to say goodbye. I think you should start packing ok. I’ll come help you in a little while, but think about what you want to take with you.” Cathy walked out of his room then and he just sat there.
I’m finally leaving this place. 4 years and I get to go. I hope I like them. I wonder what they’re like.
He started going through his closet and drawers, trying to figure out what he wanted to take with him. But it’s not like he had a lot of stuff, so he just decided it made sense to take everything - all his clothes and all his books. He sat on his bed waiting for Cathy to come back in and thought about what he wanted to write to his friends. But the more Killian thought about it, the more he didn’t feel like writing anything to Tommy, Jessie of Billy. Sure they were always together, even were in the same class at school, but none of them had been staying at the foster care centre for more than a year. Billy had only just come 3 months ago, because his parents died in a car accident. So yes, they were all friends, but Killian didn’t think that he would actually miss the three boys. He was always good at making friends. All his other friends from the foster home had come and gone over his 4-year stay. This would be just like that.
But there is Emma. You’ll miss her. Killian’s subconscious was telling him.
Yeah, he would definitely miss Emma. Even though she was a pain in his ass, she was his little rugrat. He always made sure she was safe, he always kept an eye out for her, made sure that none of the other kids made fun of her or bullied her, especially when she tried so hard to play with the boys and think she could do everything that they could. He did love her a lot, but he knew he couldn’t say bye to her. It wasn’t even the fact that she would come back from daycare after he left, but more so, that he wouldn’t be able to handle looking into her cute, big green eyes and tell her that he was leaving her. Tell her that after 3 years of always being there for her, and making sure there were no monsters under her bed, that he would be gone from her life forever. Leaving her like her parents left her.
Killian started crying suddenly, and that was how Cathy found him when she came back to his room. “Oh Killian. It’ll be okay. You’ll make new friends. And the Jones family has 2 kids – a boy and a girl. Liam is 12 years old, and Ruby is 4. You won’t be alone.”
“It’s not that Cathy. I know I’ll make new friends. I’m not sad about leaving them, I’m sad about leaving Emma. She needs me. What will she do without me?”
“Emma will be fine honey. She’s a strong girl and we will all still be here for her. She’ll forget after a few years.”
Killian got up from the bed and started going through his little shoebox in which he kept his pictures and other little mementos he had collected over the years. He took out a small keychain with a swan on it and gave it to Cathy. “Can you give this to her for me please. She’s too young for me to write her a letter; she barely knows how to read yet. But I want the rugrat to have this.”
“Killian, that was your mother’s! Are you sure you want to give it away? It’s the only thing you have left of your parents." Killian’s parents had died in a house fire when he was 3, him only surviving because he was on a play date. There hadn’t been much left in the ruins of the fire, a couple of pictures which he kept in his shoebox and his mother’s keychain.
“I know Cathy. But I have mother’s and father’s pictures. Emma doesn’t even have that of me. I don’t want her to forget me. I want to give her this. Please give it to her, and tell her that I love her and I’ll never forget her and that she will always be Killi's Rugrat. Please Cathy.” Killian looked so earnest at that moment, the young women had no chance of refusing him. She told Killian that she would give the keychain to Emma and then told him that it was time.