Archive of Our Own

The loud knock on the door made her jump out of her skin; it was unusual for her to get startled, but, she was sleeping, an also unusual deep sleep. Another rap on the front door told her that the person in the other side was having a medical emergency, as she already expected it to be. 

She shuffled around her bedroom trying to locate her shoes and an a robe to throw over her nightclothes, to go answer the door and send home who ever was seeking help... Neither her Mother, not her sister where there to provide medical attention and she was completely inept when it came to ill people.

Right when the next round of desperate knocking, threaten with dislodged the door off it's hinges, she threw the door open. She was not prepared to see the sight that greeted her: Two merchant boys, both broad shouldered and stocky built, one was sporting a tiny cut over his left eyebrow, and looked at her pleadingly while supporting the weight of his younger brother, that was badly beaten, bloodied and bruised.

Her eyes widen at the sight, but her reaction surprised even herself. She lunged forward to grasp the face of the younger boy, "Peeta!" His name slipped out of mouth unbidden, like a trembling whisper.

The older boy's eyes widen in surprise, but his brother's dreamy response made him rolled his eyes in annoyance, "Look Rye... She's even prettier up close..." The boy had a goofy lopsided smile on his face, that quickly contorted into a painful grimaced, his voice was weak, and he almost passed out right then.

"Please... Help him... I didn't know where else to take him!" The older boy pleaded. 

She helped the older boy carry the younger one into the house, and into the small kitchen; with great effort they got him to sit on the kitchen table, that doubled as her Mother's examination table. She gave him a superficial look, to assessed his injuries and work on the mayor ones first, then as if apologizing she told the older brother, that her healing capabilities were limited at best.

"Mother and Prim are attending an emergency. Normally only Mother does house calls, but Prim was needed to assist this time,  otherwise she'd be here helping him... I'm afraid I won't be able to do much, other than clean his wounds and give him something for his pain." she looked at the semi conscious boy laying on the table with a mix of anxiousness and regret in her gaze. When she turned to look at the older brother, she noticed the small trickle of blood oozing from the cut above his eyebrow. 

The boy saw her face harden, and her usual scowl appeared for the first time since she open the door. She stood on her tippy toes, and lightly touched his forehead. 

"She got you too, huh?" She muttered bitterly.

His breath hitched, and he strained to ask what she meant nervously.

"Uh... W-what d'you mean?" He was visibly shaken by her question.

"Oh, please! Like the whole district doesn't know, about your... Accidents!" She huffed irritated. She started to rut around the cupboard she knew her Mother kept the first aid materials, "Who would ever believe, that wrestling champs, with the talent to create masterpieces in icing, would be so clumsy and reckless? Would you?" She asked him fixing him with a pointed look, she brought the gauze, iodine and the little bit of rubbing alcohol they have left, she had gathered, and made a mental note to replace all of it the next day if it was possible. The boy did not answered her, he just looked at her wide eyed and mouth opened.

"Sit down, hold this to your head. I will clean the cut as soon as I'm done with your brother" she gave him a square of gauze and he held it to his cut obediently. 

"S-so... Um... You... You know who we are then?" He asked and winced at his stupid question, of course she knew who they were, everyone in the district knew the Mellark family, heck, she had just choked put his brother's name. She just glared at him, and ignored him for the time being. 

She set some water on the stove to boil, and collected a few hand towels. She returned to the injured Mellark boy, and dipped a cloth on lukewarm water, she wring the excess water, and wiped his face carefully. She rinsed the cloth, and repeated the process until his face neck and upper arms and hands were clean, he was wearing a short sleeve T-shirt, that was bloodied from his nose and cut lips, he had scratches all over his arms, and bruises everywhere, there was a cut on one of his ears she had not seen before, but the blood there was mostly dried. After she had applied some ointment in some of his bruises, she shook her head and took a deep breath, then out of nowhere she turned to the older Mellark boy and stopping only inches from his face she gritted out of clenched teeth,

"How could she do this to him? How did you let it go this far?" She was seething, the older Mellark boy, was once again speechless and wide eyed, he didn't know how to answer that, he had been asking himself the same question.

"Rye?" The voice was weak and soft, "W-where... Where...? Oh!" Katniss whirled around at the sound of his voice, and her grey stormy eyes locked with the one blue eye that was not swollen shut. His head fell back down, from where he had lifted it to seek his brother's attention. He kept staring at Katniss, like he could not believe it was her.

"You are fully awake! That's good!" she rushed to him, and held him by the biceps, "can you sit up?" Her voice was softer, than a second earlier. She looked at him expectantly. 

"I... I can try..." He breathed out.

"Here, I'll help you." she offered him her hand, and slowly he sat up. 

Another knock on the door made them all jump in place. Katniss huffed impatiently.

"Now what?" She muttered under her breath, as she made her way into the living room and towards the front door. She was surprised to see yet another Mellark brother standing in front of her, this one looked unharmed. She reasoned, this was the eldest of the three, already married and out of the house, there was no reason for his mother to abused him anymore, he was a grown man. 

"Um... Miss... Everdeen... Um... I know my brothers came here to see your mother... Um, my father, sent... Payment?" He lifted a brown bag, completely full, most likely with bread and pastries. 

"Mother is not here right now, and I'm not taking payment for doing what's right!" She spat at him angrily, then added equally hostile "You are welcome to come in if you like to see them." She stood aside and allowed him into the small house. The older Mellark, just clenched his jaw, but stepped in after her. "This way" she said as she closed the door behind them.

When he entered the narrow kitchen he saw his brothers battered forms and frowned deeply. 

"What the hell happen?" He said as greeting. He shoved the brown bag into his middle brother's chest, and approached the table.

"Sweet baby brother couldn't keep his mouth shut for an extra minute, and then all hell broke loose! What else?" The middle one answered sarcastically. The older just inched closer to the younger one, and cupped his little brother's chin to lift it up and survey the damage for himself, his brow was still furrowed. 

"God! Why can't you just... Keep your head down?" He breathed out sadly. The younger just slapped his big brother's hand away from him.

"Cut it out, Ban... I just told her the truth. I'm not going to repeat Dad's mistake and be miserable the rest of my life!" He defended himself, his big brother stepped away from him but gave him a warning look. 

"Peeta!" He gritted out.

"Well, Big bro, as Miss Everdeen here was just educating me, she, and apparently the rest of the district are already privy to our... Family secrets... So there's no real point to talk code in front of her" the one named Rye said brusquely, waving a hand towards Katniss. 

The other two boys just looked at each other, and then at their brother and then at Katniss. She started to get uncomfortable with the staring, so she cleared her throat, and then spoke in a leveled tone. 

"If you are done arguing with each other, I think I'm going to proceed to clean up everybody's wounds and apply salve to the ones that won't need stitching. There are some that will need stitching, and we will have to wait for my mother or my sister for that. If either of you needs something for the pain let me know." None of the Mellark boys spoke, but merely nodded in agreement. Katniss tried to approach Peeta, but he put both hands up, as if trying to fend her off, and she stopped short in front of him, looking confused.

"Please, take care of my brother first, he had that nasty gash over there, and he got a rolling pin to the back as we were leaving the house..." his voice was soft and surprisingly even. She nodded, and turned around to work on the middle Mellark. 

Just as she had done with Peeta, she used a wet warm rag to wipe his face clean; she then handed him another rag so he could cleaned his own arms and hands. While this was going on, Katniss heard the door open and close; her mother and sister most had gotten back, she rushed to meet them and to ask for help with the bigger injuries.

Mrs Everdeen, was dropping her medicine kit into the couch, she had noticed the lights on, she only attributed that to them had been on since last time the district had power running, they most have forgotten to flip the switch off. So it was a surprise to see Katniss come out the kitchen, out of breath and looking frazzled and angry. 

"Oh, Thank God you are home!" Katniss grabbed her mother by the arm and pulled her into the kitchen forcefully,

Prim asked bewildered, "Katniss, what's the matter?"

"I need you here! I can't help him... Them... I don't know how, and he got a couple of broken fingers and a horrible gash on his cheek and both of them need stitching..." She was frantic, Mrs Everdeen had never seen her like this before, she felt her stomach fall, she wonder what had happened to Gale or any of the other Hawthorns, they were the only people that could elicit this reaction from her oldest girl. 

She took Katniss's hand as calmly as she could, and took a deep breath, "Alright Katniss, you need to calm down a bit, and tell me what happened, I will go tend to them..."

"Just come in to the kitchen!" She pulled her mother into the already crowded space, and she was shocked to see who the patients were. She understood immediately where the injuries came from, but said nothing, just mutely assessed the two boys, and Katniss's work on both of them. 

She had no idea what had prompted her daughter to help this kids, she was aware that the youngest was in her same year in school, but she had never heard her say anything about knowing the baker's sons before, she knew she traded with the baker on a regular basis, but that still did not account for her actions. Katniss had never, not once assist in caring for a patient, she was squeamish and bolted as soon as a badly hurt or very sick person came into the house.

"Prim, please make tea" she ordered calmly. "Enough for everyone."

Prim nodded, dutifully, she did not made any comments, but she could see her sister, lurking nervously in the background, out of the corner of her eyes. Mrs Everdeen set the younger boy's broken fingers, he yelped in pain, but quickly stopped, and Katniss started to look a little pale. The boy's fingers where placed on a flat pice of thin wood, and wrapped tightly with adhesive. She stitched his chin and over his cheekbone, and the small cut on the shell of his ear. He had a cut on his lip, and she knew he had bruises under his shirt, but she needed to tend to the other boy, who by now was looking pale and queasy, a purplish bruised had formed to the side of his head very close to were his eyebrow was bleeding none stop. He was holding onto a brown bakery bag for dear life, she took it away from him and placed it on an empty chair, she was surprised Katniss had done such good job cleaning them up and even applying a small layer if salve to the bruises that could not be helped otherwise.

The eldest Mellark spoke, "Thank you for helping my brothers Mrs Everdeen." She nodded and said,

"I'm here to help Bannock" the young baker was taken aback to be addressed by his first name, but merely nodded, she then asked motioning to the bag with her head while stitching his brother's brow, "Are there any crackers or cookies in there?" 

"Uh... I'm not sure. Father... He called me to the bakery, and he had already packed the bag when I arrived, he just told me to bring it over and stay with the boys" he said apologetically. She nodded again.

"Would you mind looking if there are any? your brothers need to eat something." She said firmly.

"But... Ma'am, this is your payment... We will not take your food from you..." He started to argue, but Katniss that had been quiet so far, jumped in furious.

"Just give them the blasted cookies!" She snatched the bag up and started looking in its contents. "We can live with out cookies, but I will not have either of them pass out because they don't have any energy left in them!" She produced two sugar cookies out of the bag, and handed one to each boy, all in the room where just staring at her. 

Peeta took a bite of his cookie just to please her, but caused his lip to start bleeding.

"Peeta... You are bleeding again!" She cried out, She took the cookie from him and with a damp gauze started to clean his lip tenderly.

"You know my name..." It was a breathy whisper that left his bloody lips, the ghost of a smile appeared there, he just kept staring at her, while she worked. Mrs Everdeen saw a strange look passed between the other brothers.

"Um... Ma'am... Would it be alright if you show me to the bathroom? I need to... Um..." Rye said quietly

"Oh... Yes, Follow me."

"Ban... I will need you to, um help me with my zipper?" He said lamely, this was the stupidest excuse to get anyone out of a room in the history of excuses, lucky for them, Prim had been sent to get ready for bed a few minutes earlier. Everyone vacated the kitchen silently. 

Katniss was still tending to Peeta, "Why do you let her do this to you?" She asked quietly, anger still edged in her voice.

He exhaled all the air he had in his lungs, and his shoulders deflated. "I-I... She hasn't done anything this extreme before, and usually I can handle it so much better than this..." He winced, when she fixed him with an angry look. He could not believe he was this close to her, he could see a very light layer of tiny freckles over the bridge of her delicate nose, her eyelashes were thick and long, and framed her beautiful grey eyes adorably, he shook his head to rid himself of this thoughts, he wasn't supposed to be crushing on his... Nurse? Problem was, he had been crushing on her from afar all his life, and this was the very first time they had even spoken to each other... of course he was going to get his fill of her gorgeous face while he could. His hands itched to touch her, but he knew touching her would just garner him another beating, this time by the girl nursing him back to health. 

"How can you defend this? She shouldn't even be touching you, let alone hurting you! I swear... Your mother is lucky weapons aren't allowed inside the fence! Otherwise I'd be hunting her down, right now!" He looked at her with his good eye wide and his good eyebrow raised high. Nobody, ever, had said anything like that to him... Every word she said was treasonous, and dangerous and honest! He had to stop her before anyone else could hear her, the implications were too severe to be talking about it so lightly. So impulsively, he grabbed her by the neck, and slaped his big, calloused hand over mouth. 

"Katniss... Shhhh! Don't say that!" He looked alarmed, and she was so startled by how quicker he moved she didn't have time to react, until her eyes saw the fear in his one open eye "I don't want you to get in trouble on my behalf, I would die if you get hurt because someone heard you talk about the other side of the fence, let alone your bow!" He whispered so low, she almost didn't hear everything he said, he let go of her slowly. it was her turn to look at him with wide, scared eyes, she realized she had spoken without thinking what she was saying... And, how did he know she actually had a bow? Well... That was a stupid question, of course he knew about her bow, she had been selling squirrels to his dad for years. Then the picture of one of her arrows sticking out of Mrs. Mellark's chest materialized in her minds eye, she nearly vomit at the image. She realized, she'd never be able to shoot a person in cold blood. 

"Just... Just... Don't let her do this to you." She begged, "You got beaten because of me once, and I hated it then... I hate that after so many years she still does it..." She spat the words at him, but he interrupted her ranting, her hands lingered clutching his face, while she was supposed to be cleaning him up.

"You remember that? How... How did you figure I got beaten for helping you?" He asked nervously, not quite meeting her gaze.

"Peeta, I will never forget that awful day... Or the very nice thing you did for me... And my family... I suspected you burned those loaves intentionally... For me... And got hit by your mother in the process... I've always felt ashamed for never thanking you for it... I should have, I should have told you that it wasn't right for your mother to treat you that way, but... I'm awful with words..." She swallowed, this was the most she had ever said to any one person, other than Prim. Returning to her work, she asked quietly, "Why did she do it this time?"

"I told her I wasn't going to marry any Merchant girl, to leave me the hell alone, and to stop pressuring me about it. But she got truly angry when I told her I didn't care if I had to work as a miner to support myself... that really seem to pissed her off!" He said with a small smile, that comment pissed Katniss off.

"What? You can't be serious! You can't be a miner! No way in hell!" her grey eyes were molten lava, he felt the anger seep out if them.

"And why the hell not? I'm strong you know... I can do manual labor, I'm not soft, even though I work in a bakery. I could hold my own in the mines!" He argued.

"No!" Her response was cutting, "I know what you are capable of Peeta, I'm not blind! I've seen you carry those huge sacks of flour around the district, I've been to every one of your matches at school... I know you are no weakling... But, You are supposed to marry a nice merchant girl, live in town and work some store front, and live, a long, comfortable and happy life!" she yelled at him. 

"Are you serious? You can't be siding with my mother! You just threaten to rip her a new one! you can't change your mind... I won't marry anyone from town! I won't become my father, I much rather live here in the Seam than be as unhappy and miserable as my parents are in their marriage!" He yelled back at her, he slammed his injured hand against the table, and yelp in pain, she rushed to his aid, and so did everyone else, including a disheveled looking Primrose, that had clearly just woken up from all the yelling.

"What is going on here?" She asked looking at the feuding teenagers aghast, she saw how her sister was clutching the baker's son's bandaged hand, and walked towards them still looking puzzled. The rest of them just lurked around the arch dividing the kitchen and dinning area from the rest of the house. "Let me see your hand." She calmly directed at Peeta, but Katniss wouldn't relent her hold. Prim had to pry his hand out her sister's grip, to check for any re-aggravation, she found none, and let him go. She did noticed just like mother the bruises that were hidden under the soft cotton of his T-shirt, but unlike her mother, she asked him to remove it, to see the extend of the damage. 

At the sight of his battered chest, Katniss made a strangled growl noise in the back of her throat, and marched out of the kitchen stomping her feet, the older boys followed her to the small living room, where she was pacing on the other side of the faded couch, her arms were crossed over her chest, and she was chewing at her thumb nail. She stopped suddenly and started screaming at the older Mellark boys. 

"How can you stand by, and watch her beat him to a pulp?" her face was burning, she felt her whole body shake in rage. It wasn't their fault, they also suffered at the witch's  hands, but if ever something like that were to happened to Prim, she for sure would do something to defend her sister. "It's not right for a mother to inflict all that pain on her own child! It's not right... that him, of all people get treated this way!" She felt angry hot tears fall down her cheeks, she had never cried in front of anybody, not even when her father died after that mine explosion. But now, Peeta wanted to be a miner, live in the Seam, and be poor... She didn't understand why she was so angry about any of this, why did she feel so invested? She didn't know any of them, the only one she had ever interacted with was the Baker himself... And where was him right now, instead of watching over his children? 

"I-I need to go... Take care of him!" She said weakly, and walked right passed them both. The two of them, felt awful, they knew they deserved her anger, they didn't know she cared about their brother, so Rye said, with a sad smirk.

"At least, he now knows she does give a shit about him..." Bannock just shrugged.

"It doesn't matter... Mother would kill him before he even set a foot in the seam."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I'll do it!" She said taking the cloth away from Prim's hands, they hadn't heard her come into the kitchen, but she couldn't take his hissing in pain anymore, she thought that Prim was being unnecessary and uncharacteristically rough while wiping his chest cleaned. So she decided to take over. His breath hitched, when her slender fingers grazed his skin. She had seen him in his wrestling unitards countless times, but she had never been this close to a semi naked boy before, specially one that was as muscly and broad and well defined as he was, his chest was firm and warm, his skin was actually soft to the touch, he had a bit of hair on his chest, and she was fascinated by it.

She nearly jumped out of her skin, when her mother, spoke to him, right next to her. "Here, drink all of it, I put sleep syrup in it. I think is better if you sleep here tonight, and go home tomorrow morning. Those fingers need to settle, and I'm afraid we have already seen that they won't settle right if we sent you home without supervision... you have to be careful" 

Katniss blushed fiercely, and trained her eyes on one angry looking burn on his upper arm, it was to high and the angle to improbable to have it been the result of the hazards of working in a bakery. Her lips formed a thin line, and he eyebrows narrowed. After he had drank half his tea, she asked,

"What happened here?" She pointed at the burn, her voice was as soft as she could muster. 

"Fell into the open oven door... Trying to back away from her... She didn't technically gave me the burn." He smiled, but she scowled. She took another little container of salve, she knew it was for burns. She started dabbing it on his marks, the accidental ones, on his forearms and hands, the dubious ones as well. 

The Mellark boys, came into the kitchen, and all but pulled the Everdeen women out. "Let's... Let's give them a moment alone..." Said Rye.

"It's the first time they actually speak to each other" said Bannock apologetically. "He needs to get it out of his system once and for all."

"what do you mean?" Asked Prim confused. 

"Erm... Well, our little brother... Um..." Rye stammered, looking for a way to explain a life long crush to this people.

"Since when had they liked each other?" Came Mrs Everdeen's even voice, she didn't show any emotion, other than seriousness.

"Um... We only know about our brother... He has talked about Katniss Everdeen since... Ever! First grade, maybe?" Eyes on his brother, seeking confirmation. All he got was a noncommittal shrug "Most of his beatings were caused by his little unrealistic dreams of romance with a little girl from the Seam, but, whatever mother did, he just grew more enamored with the idea..." Bannock offered.

"We didn't know, she even knew who he was until tonight. But, judging by her fits and the little outbursts she's had, it's clear she very well knows who he is, and what he does. As of she liking him, I wouldn't know anything about it."

"Well, one thing I can say for certain: My daughter has never tended to a patient before, I didn't even knew she had the skills to do it, but she did an exceptional job cleaning your wounds, and her hands seem dexterous at applying salves and ointments, so she definetly could work as a healer if she wasn't so squeamish about blood and pain..."

"But... She's a hunter? How can she be bothered by blood and pain?" interrupted a bewildered Rye.

"Ugh... You don't know Katniss... She rather kill things than heal them!" Prim said dismissively, "The point is... She took her fears and shoved them deep down, and tried, successfully if we may add, to help you both, while Mother and I were away... Whether you had been other people, I doubt she would have even let you inside the house to begin with." 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Does this hurt?" She asked softly, she was so close to him, he could feel the warmth irradiate from her body towards him. The small house, was a cookie cutter replica of the rest of the houses in the Seam, it was drafty and although tonight, by some miracle there was electricity running, he was sure by the amount of candle stubs everywhere he looked, it was usually poorly lit. It was just early summer, and the draftiness actually felt nice, he couldn't imagine living in a place like it during the dead of winter. He could see now, why her angry lashing at him, upon hearing his desire to move to the Seam and become a miner. Then again, she lost her father to a mining accident. She probably hated the mines... It had nothing to do with his well being. 

"No... It doesn't hurt at all. My hands are actually a little desensitized by now... All this years of holding hot trays and little burns here and there... It's no big deal." He said in answer to her question about a cut on his palm. She carefully put a little bit of ointment on it. He had started to feel the effect of the sleep syrup, he started to unabashedly stare at her face, particularly her mouth.

The words just slipped out of him, "You are the most beautiful creature I have ever seen!" Her eyes snapped up to his. The single blue eye looking back at her was starting to get hazy, but it was still alert and honest, she scowled at him and he smiled like and idiot. "Even when you do that..." With his index finger, he made a circular motion in the direction of her face, "You look adorable... You have... The most beautiful eyes I have ever seen in my life! And your nose, God... I love your nose! But, your lips are the thing I'm most concern about..." he furrowed his brow as if in concentration "I wish you would marry me so I could kiss your lips anytime I want!" He announced, and then gave a big yawn. Her heart was hammering hard in her chest, she kept telling herself it was the syrup talking... But then, another thought prickled her subconscious 'syrup won't make things up, it just bring them up to the front of your mind; syrup will push words out of your mouth of things you have already been thinking about, unless you force them to stay in.' 

"I thought you got the crap beat out of you, because you refused to marry..." She said sarcastically fixing him with a cold stare. 

"No... I said: I wasn't going to marry any Merchant girl... I didn't say anything about you... Hell, you are the only girl I want, Katniss!" He said seriously. Her eyes grew two sizes as she realized he was being honest, he gave another little yawn.

"You don't know what you're saying, Peeta! Of course you don't want me... I'm sour, unfriendly and close off, and that's just the beginning of my faults!" She said as she hurried to wrap a thin layer of bandages over his torso, the list of supplies that needed replacing kept growing In her mind.

"Oh, Katniss... You have no idea...the effect you can have..." He sighed softly, "You fascinate me... You're strong, and selfless, and pretty, and braver than any boy I know... you are beautiful, in case I have not said so already... You are amazing!" He said dreamily. She laughed at how ridiculous this conversation was, he was delirious.

"Sure Peeta! Whatever you say!" she said dismissively, he frowned.

"I'm being honest! I think you are the most amazing person in the world, and my life long dream is to one day make you my wife, and to kiss you and hold you in my arms everyday for the rest of my life! Why won't you believe me?" He asked and his voice had and edge of pain and defensiveness to it. 

"Peeta..." She breathed out, and shook her head sadly. His hand tenderly cupping her cheek startled her. Her eyes trained on his, and she saw a world of feelings locked behind those retinas... It truly scared her to no end, but instead of running away, like her normal response would be, she stayed there, rooted to the floor. 

"I love how you say my name..." he whispered, they had gravitated towards the other without realizing it. His broken hand tried to caressed her face, but the pain and restrictions, only allowed the tip of his fingers to graze over her ear and neck, she shivered at his soft touch. They where so close to each other now, she could see how long his very blond eyelashes were, she was mesmerized by them, their noses nearly touched now. And his voice was a barely there hint.

"Marry me... I'll come live here with you. Away from town and all it's prejudice... Marry me, Katniss, please!" He begged quietly, his broken lips brushing against hers.

Her eyes where slowly closing, then she shut them tightly, and breathed deeply. "I can't Peeta..." Was her answer, it surprised her how much feeling and regret the words carried, leaving her mouth. "You will be better off staying in town. You will be guarantied a longer life than any miner." she closed the almost nonexistent distance between their lips, and kissed him, with such tenderness, it was unbelievable she had just refused his proposal. 

When the kiss was over, they stayed connected by their foreheads, breathing heavily, still framing her face with his hands, her hands laying on his lap forgotten. "Just... Think about it... Don't say No right away!" He begged again.

"Peeta, you are drugged up right now, your brain is just saying nonsensical stuff. Tomorrow, you will wake up, with a clearer mind, and regret what you said tonight, please don't throw away your life for me... No merchant ever wants to leave a life of security and peace for the harshness of the seam, believe me." She said matter-of-factly. He separated from her and gave her and incredulous look, and then masking his face behind hardness, he retorted,

"You are wrong... You off all people should know." He said coldly, taking his hands away from her face, he called loudly, "Mrs Everdeen!" Katniss felt her heart race, and her face fall in shame... Her mother, a merchant, left town for a life in the Seam. But then the other side of the coin vindicated her words, they had been to very brink if starvation and her mother had not been able to cope.

"Mother lost her family, friends and the love of her life, because she chose a miner! Her life is hard and sad! I won't let you become her!" She hissed at him as she heard her Mother's hurried steps approach. 

"Her life wasn't always sad, Katniss... I grew up watching her!" was the last thing he said to her before she pushed away from him, right as Mrs Everdeen entered the kitchen.

"How can I help you, dear?" 

"I wouldn't mind sleeping on this table if this is where you want me, otherwise, can you please direct me to where I'm to lay down?" He slurred, trying to stifle a yawn.

"Oh heavens! I'm so sorry, I forgot about the syrup. Let me have your brothers help you get to the couch, no need for you to stay on the hard table."

The next morning, even before the sun was out, Katniss saw all three Mellark boys get ready to leave her house, it surprised her, when Peeta turned around, and stood close to her, his body scarce two inches from hers. He whispered in her ear before returning to his place in town.

"I still choose you!" 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The frozen ground crunched loudly under her hunting boots, as she followed close behind the Mayor's only daughter. She happened to be Katniss's only friend at school. She had convinced Madge, to go with her to the bakery; it was a veiled, desperate attempt at finding out what was going on! She hadn't spoken a word to Peeta since early summer; they had kept stealing  glances at one another at school, and he was getting reckless about it. When they were younger, He used to just flit his gaze away quickly, any time she caught him looking at her; now, once he zeroed in on her gaze, his eyes followed her everywhere shamelessly. She would return his glances and even hold his stare for a moment every so often, but, sometimes his stare was so intense she would blush and look away,  that was as far as they went. Only staring, never talking.

Rye and his fiancée, had announced their Toasting ceremony to be held at the beginning of spring; very soon after, Peeta started sporting more bruises and out of place burns, than she had ever seen on any of the Mellark boys previously. She thought she knew why. So when he didn't show up to his classes for the second day in a row, she worried. After bribing and begging, Madge had agreed to go to the bakery, and pretend she was there to buy pastries for a study group, and Katniss would be there as her assistant, and then if they could covertly ask someone about Peeta, then their mission would be a success.

Their feet finally reached pavement, and Katniss wrapped her coat tighter around herself.

"You ok there?" Madge's soft voice swept in the wind reached her ears.

"Yeah... It's just, very cold... And the stupid wind isn't helping..." She replyed. 

She made an agreeing noise that was almost lost in the wind. "Well, We will be inside the warm bakery in a minute... This really is an awful day to be outside." She said while trying to wrangled back the long blond hairs that had escaped her lose ponytail.

Soon enough they were stepping into the bakery. So far their luck was pretty good, the witch was not at the register where she usually was, Mr Mellark was there in her place, and Rye, just happened to entered the room carrying a tray of freshly baked sourdough, they started bringing out their savory stuff after school was out, for it was when most people that could afford bread came to secured their own for supper. Rye stopped short, as he saw Katniss standing there, it was weird not seeing her sneak to the back door, his face harden, and he shook his head sadly at her, then as if unconsciously his blue eyes went up to the ceiling and flit back to the girls standing on the other side of the counter. He smiled jovially at them, and before his father could talk, he said,

"What can I do for you, Ladies?" He fixed Katniss with a look, that didn't go unnoticed by either his dad or Madge. 

"Miss Undersee! I'm glad you came!" Rushed Mr Mellark, "I have some rolls ready to be sent out to your house, if you please let me step into the kitchen for a moment, I will get them ready for you!" He smiled broadly, the girl had never spoken to any of the Mellark's much, but she had picked up bread and pastries before, so it wouldn't be completely unexpected that this would be the reason why she was there, she smiled sweetly at the baker and answered equally enthused. 

"Thank you Mr. Mellark! I appreciate it!" She said politely.

The man rushed inside, and gave his son a look, he whispered something that was loud enough, for both girls to hear. "Make it quick, I'll distract your mother." Then he was gone.

Rye leaned over the counter, and beconed Katniss to approach, she did quickly, remembering the Baker's last words before leaving the room.

"Are you crazy? What are you trying to do coming here? Get him killed?" He shot angrily, he saw her confusion and fear in her eyes, then leaned in closer to her and spoke faster, "He's fine! Just got a broken arm, we took him to the town Doctor, because it was a bigger injury, we needed an official doctor's note for the peacekeepers, and he had a more legitimate excuse for it..." He was whispering fast, but Katniss interrupted him at the last sentence, looking appalled.

"legitimate excuse? What the hell does that mean?" She gritted between clenched teeth. "I can not believe how you just let this keep happening to him! I swear to God..."

He just huffed, and talked over her as low as he could, "Katniss, he was lucky she didn't do more to him!... in a fit of anger he screamed at her that he asked you to marry him, and that if you said yes, he would be leaving Town to work in the mines... Is any of that true?" Her heart jumped and raced a mile a second, she felt bile go up her throat, her eyes grew to ridiculous sizes. 

"He... We... We kissed... Once... And I told him... I said, I couldn't marry him, that I couldn't let him throw out his life like that..." she felt her throat constrict painfully and her eyes watered. "Please Rye... Make him see reason... I don't want him to lose his family and friends, and the prospect of a good life, just because a silly infatuation..." She begged. Madge started rubbing her friends back soothingly; Katniss had forgotten the girl was even there.

Rye, lowered his head and shook it, then looked back at her. "To him, is not just an infatuation that will fade soon, Katniss..." He said sadly, "He told me after that night... That he had loved you since he was a little boy. He said he would take any amount of beatings, if that would bring him closer to you... Do you understand that?" He asked staring into her eyes, his eyes where a shade lighter than Peeta's, but the shape was the same and the warmth they held was very similar. "You have to go now, before Mother figures out you are here... Not even being with the Mayor's daughter would help you if she found out"

At that, she sobered up, and stood up to her full hight. "If she ever touches him again... I will end her Rye, mark my words!" She hissed. The her face softened, "Tell him... Tell him... To... Not. Provoke her." With that she stepped away from the counter. And turned to look at her friend, that was staring at her with raised eyebrows, but said nothing about anything she heard. "Madge... I'm... I'm gonna go home." Madge nodded, and gave her hand a quick squeeze. 

"See you at school tomorrow!"

"See you!"

Katniss left the bakery, and started to walk away from town. As she was making a turn into a deserted alleyway she knew by heart, that would take her unnoticed back to the Seam, she felt a strong hand grip her arm and pulled her into the shadows of the alley, before she could make a sound, her back hit the brick wall of the shoe shop, and a pair of lips covered hers. The smell, and warmth of her attacker were familiar and strangely comforting... Cinnamon and dill, and home... She wrapped her arms around his neck and returned the kiss fervently. He broke the kiss after a long moment, to allow her breath, while he planted tiny kisses on her cheek and along her jaw line. She breathed his name softly.

"Peeta..." She opened her eyes slowly, she didn't know when had she closed them. She caressed his face softly, and kissed him on the lips once very quickly. He had grown stubble, and she rather liked it. He nuzzled her face for a moment, and kissed again. 

"You have no idea how much I've missed seeing your beautiful face... Marry me, so I never have to miss you ever again" He whispered. She released a shuddering breath, and closed her eyes to think her answer. She couldn't say yes, she didn't wanna marry anyone, whatever this thing with Peeta was, she had to stop it now, but she had to protect him from his mother, until he was 18 and his name was out of the reaping bowl, he was bound to that house.

"When is your birthday?" She asked quietly, he pushed away from her face to give her a quizzical look. 

"March 23rd... Why?" he asked amusedly.

"Curious." she answered nonchalantly. He nodded, and a mischievous grin graced his face.

"Fine, Miss Everdeen... I get it... I will get to know you first, then I'll ask you to marry me again." He said, giving her another peck in the lips. That wasn't exactly what she had in mind, but she'll take it. "I know your birthday is May 8th, that your favorite bread is the baguette, but you would always get multigrain because it's more nutritional than the plain white baguette, you only speak to Madge Undersee at school, and for what I saw today she's your friend outside of school as well... you love your sister more than anything, and... Um... Your other friend that tall guy..."

"Gale" she muttered.

"Gale" he repeated. "Is NOT dating you!" 

"How do you know so much about me?" She asked a little taken aback. "And... Whe-where did that thing about me and Gale dating come from?" She wrinkled her nose as she said the word 'dating'. He smiled broadly, and kissed again.

"Oh, well, it would be terrible to be kissing another guy's girlfriend, so... I had to make very sure about that one..." He smirked, "But, that's not all I know... I know that you are and amazing archer, my dad always says that you get the squirrels right in the eye, and I know for a fact, that it takes discipline, patience, practice, and a great deal of skill, to do that, so I deduce you have all of those. Also, I figured that you hate working as a healer, but you are still talented at it." She snorted, her arms where lazily hanging from his shoulders, and his hand was resting on her coat padded ribcage. His other arm laid limp on the sling that hanged from his neck. 

"I'm a terrible healer... Actually I'm not a healer at all... That's my mother's and Prim's thing. Me? I kill things, remember?" She said peering up at him. 

"Mmm... Whatever... I should ask you something I don't know... Let's see... Something deep and meaningful!" He said cocking his head to the side, she raised an eyebrow at him, "Got it!" He exclaimed triumphantly, she laughed loudly, and his breathing hitched at the sound and look of her.

"Fine... What is it Mellark?" she asked smiling. He cupped her cheek and kissed her deeply; He asked his question softly, against her lips.

"Alright beautiful... What's your favorite color?" She laughed again and he laughed with her.

she then looked at him, and said firmly, "Green, what's yours?" 

"Orange!" He said happily, she pursed her lips to keep them from smiling, and asked.

"Orange? Like Effie Trinkets last year's hair?" She said amused. He chuckled.

"No... A more muted shade of orange, like... Sunset." She smiled a big genuine smile at his answer.

"I can see it in my head now! It's a loverly color!." She affirmed. He smiled and kissed her forehead. then he took a deep breath, and stepped away from her, she realized the temperature had dropped considerably, only his body heat had kept her ignorant of the change. 

"I will be back to school tomorrow... But... Thanks for coming and checking on me." He said sheepishly. She almost asked him how he knew she had come to the bakery to inquire about his whereabouts, but realized, she had been kissing him and embracing him all this time, what else would he assume? This was her chance... she was going to milk it for all it was worth. 

"Look, Peeta... I'm not sure if us being together is the most advisable thing in the world at the moment... So I think we should... Cool it?" Peeta snorted, and lunged at her, pinning her back to the brick wall behind her, his body completely flushed with hers, her face was turned to the side, while he kissed her temple, cheek, jaw, neck, and back up, she moaned quietly. And he rested his forehead on her shoulder. Then he reached her ear, and whispered,

"Unless you tell me you hate me, and you don't want to see me again, or worse... You tell me you are marrying that Gale Hawthorne guy... I don't think I can stay away from you... Not after I have tasted your lips, not after we started talking to each other. Maybe we do need to take it slower, get to know each other better, but, believe me... Until you tell me, that you don't want me doing this to you ever again... I'll keep asking you, until you say yes!" And with that he grabbed her face in his good hand and kissed her passionately, this time his kiss was more... Involved. He slipped his tongue into her mouth and she opened up eagerly, he nipped her lower lip and then sucked on it, hard. She was making all kinds of noises that would embarrass her later, but right then she was more preoccupied with a feeling of burning hunger deep in her lower belly. She had no idea what did that meant, but as soon as he broke the kiss. She pulled him down for another one, and then her hands locked into his silky dirty blond waves, and they kissed for a long time, until he started kissing her chin and neck, and he, had to stop before he went too far. 

"Now you've done it, Everdeen..." He muttered, his head leaning against the cold wall next to her head. She turned to look at him.

"What have I done?" She asked breathless 

"You have finally, truly ruined me for any other woman..." He turned his head to look at her now. "I'm yours, whether you take me or not."

Her lip twitched. "Peeta... Promise me, you will keep your head down at home... You won't provoke her, no matter what she says... Promise me..." She begged, then whiteout looking at him, she added, "You... You can ask me again... after the reaping... I will answer you once and for all" 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Hey Catnip!" her best friend was unusually happy, for a Reaping Day morning.

"Mornin' Gale!" She said as she plopped down next to him on their meeting place. The morning was fresh and the air was sweet, such a beautiful beginning, for a terrible day. It was ironic, how such a beautiful morning could be the beginning of the most terrible day of someone's life in this district... In all of Panem rather. 23 families will loose a child today, 24 children will be sent to their deaths in a few hours time, and there was nothing anyone could do about about It. 

"So... I got a surprise for you!" Gale said cheerfully, he really was creeping her out. this was so unlike him, it was disturbing. Then, he produced a small cupcake, frosted in white, a little Katniss flower on top. She looked at him in surprise, she had no idea what had this small sweet cost him, but she didn't dare ask, what she was determined to ask was about the reasoning behind such ostentatious gift.

"Oh Gale, it's beautiful! You shouldn't have!" she said softly. Gale shrugged, and placed the cupcake on her hand. 

"It's your last reaping Catnip! Of course I should have!" He smiled broadly at her... There it was! The reason of this huge expense. She frowned for a moment.

"Gale... isn't it costumary to celebrate after the reaping?" She tried to stay serious, but his smile was infectious. 

"Maybe... But... I figured I give it to you right now... For, good luck you know!" She finally relented, and took a bite. The sweet icing melted on her tongue, and the actual cupcake was soft and fluffy and full of delicious vanilla flavor. She closed her eyes and moaned her approval.

"Mmm... This is delicious, Gale! Thank you!" She said licking her lips and fingers; it happened so fast, she had no way of preventing it... Her best friend had smashed his lips against hers with lighting speed, he was devouring her mouth, tasting the confection she was just eating. Finally regaining her senses, she gingerly pushed away from him. He had tried this before, she had known about his misguided feelings for her for a couple of months now, but she refused to hurt his feelings by telling him she wasn't interested, she was sure she would lose his friendship if she flat out said she didn't love him like that; so far she had given him excuses such a as: 'she wasn't ready for a relationship', or 'she was still too young', or that 'her family came first', and he'd back off for a while, only to return more forcefully the next time. 

Now that she had some kind of 'understanding' with Peeta, she was sure she didn't want a romantic relationship with Gale; it wasn't like she was going to marry Peeta either, they hadn't even make their thing official... she didn't want to marry anyone, she didn't want to ever be in a position were children were a possibility, but, she hadn't said that to Peeta either, she did tell Gale about her resolution to never have children a couple of years earlier, the problem was, he still chose to forget that tidbit of conversation. 

The reality of her romantic situation was, that she only spoke to the boy that would sneak kisses out of her willingly in passing at school corridors, while retrieving or depositing books in and out of lockers, or  during classes while sharpening a pencil, or at the cafeteria while getting a tray with a cup of water to drink with her home packed meal, because water is free. True to his word, during those flitting seconds together at school, He usually had a question ready to shoot of something he didn't know about her. They only spoke long enough so that she could answer him. And in rare occasions, she'd tell him if she could meet him after school for a minute or so. They never talked in those sparse moments when they snuck behind the school building, or behind the shoe shop, they were scarce and far between and all they wanted to do with their lips was to joined them together.

She found out soon enough, that she really, really, liked kissing him. That's why she was feeling so awful at the moment, because she didn't feel the same way about the two or three kisses Gale had managed to get out of her, and although she didn't have anything official with Peeta, she felt guilty, as if she was cheating on him. She had to get away from this and quick. She had to say something to bring Gale back to hunting mode.

"Um... I think we should go fishing today... we haven't fished in a while, and I think fish and Katniss tubers would make a lovely supper, I will save the rest of the cupcake to share with Prim..." Gale noticed her discomfort, and tensed up right away.

"There's no need Katniss..." he said harsher than he wanted; he didn't mentioned the kiss, and she was grateful for that, but, the change of name did not get lost on her. "The baker's youngest son apparently made a batch of cupcakes and mistook the katniss flower for a pansy... He said he ruined three of them before he realized..." He chuckled shaking his head, Katniss just stared at the little treat with it's sugar flower... The hell he mistook the Katniss for a pansy! Her lip lift at the corner, then she looked at him, and asked him, 

"How much did he charge for them if he said they were ruined?" she asked suspiciously. If Peeta had ripped Gale off, she would let him have it!

Gale laughed heartily. "The guy offered them to me for free! Can you believe him? As if I would ever accept charity from a merchant... No, I tried to pay one squirrel per cupcake, but then he asked for a big rabbit... and then he said if I was too busy to deliver it later today, he wouldn't mind to take it from you instead. I figured you wouldn't mind." She fought the urge to roll her eyes at Peeta's sneakiness. Gale said a little sheepish, "I promised mother I'd be there to walk with Vick today. You know it's his first reaping and he's nervous." he said uncomfortable. Katniss nodded, because she knew it couldn't be easy for Gale to have to walk another one of siblings to the reaping, while there was absolutely nothing he could do to protect him. She would be in the same situation for the next three years, walking with Prim to the town square, helpless, because she'd be to old to be eligible, until her Little Duck was out of the reaping bowl as well; but Gale, had a long road to go, with Vick and then Posy... She had no idea, how the idea of bringing more children into this godawful world was still appealing to him.

After fishing, and gathering, they collected a few rabbits out of the snare line. Katniss had shot a few different critters and their game bags where bursting at the seams. They had just skinned the biggest rabbit, to go to the baker, and she had gathered all the strawberries that she could hold, to bring to Madge as a reaping day gift... Madge had given her a few old dresses that were too short for her, that Katniss gave to Prim in turn. For some reason, taking the dresses for Prim, didn't feel wrong, or like charity. She was lost in her mental preparations for all the things she needed to do, now that she was done with the reaping and school; her mind also traveled to wondering what would Peeta do, now that he was almost free of the reaping? Would he finally leave town and become a miner? She hoped he didn't. If he became a miner, it would make it harder to refuse his marriage proposal. She had told him to 'ask her again' after the reaping, because, although she didn't want to get married, she realized, she would not mind an adult relationship with him... She was not as naive anymore, she could now recognize their urges, the hunger, the tingling sensations... as a matter of fact, she could clearly remember the feeling of him pressed against her, and how their bodies felt, the rush of adrenaline at his fevered kisses, the way he lifted her up and how she automatically wrapped her legs around his middle, and then the way he felt throbbing with want against her stomach, before excusing himself followed by the many apologies he muttered after. Why, she was growing arouse just thinking about it... About him...

"Um... Catnip..." Gale's voice brought her racing thoughts to a screeching halt, she felt flustered and guilty.

"Umm... Yeah?" She said, hoping her voice tone, could passed as just strained with exertion.

"There... There was something important, I wanted to talk to you about." He said quietly. 

"Alright... I'm all ears!" She said a little more confidently. She had just deposited her bow and quiver full of arrows inside the hollow tree trunk they used to hide their things. Gale knelt next to her and passed his bow and quiver, when she was about to raise up, he held her hand and kept her there close to the ground.

"Catnip, we have been friends for six, almost seven years now. I've seen you struggle and come up a winner, and I've seen you grow and become a beautiful woman, with many qualities, and the best damn aim!" he laughed nervously and clasped both her hands in his, and started to rub circles on the top of her hands. She scowled, and felt like a boulder was sitting in her throat. "Katniss... After today's reaping, after your name is forever gone from that bowl... You will be free to pursue a life of your own, a future, a family to raise... Katniss,  Would you... Toast with me?" Well, shit... Even knowing it's coming didn't prepared her for the full blow of the thing.

"Gale... You already know how I feel about marriage, and children... I can't do either, I won't marry someone to then love them more than my own life, or bring more children into this Godforsaken place, to be sent to the reaping... I won't do it, and I know that you want them... children of your own... I'm not saying that its wrong, or stupid, I just... Can't do it... Plus... It wouldn't fair to wait her of us... I'm sorry, Gale" her voice was a mere whisper, her eyes were downcast, she could not look at him, she could not face his disappointment, or sadness. She tried to get up, but he still anchored her to the mossy ground. 

"Katniss, please... Just... Think about it! We could be so great together! Everyone already thinks we will end up toasting sooner or later, we are a great team, we are friends, we know each other's families... What else could you need or want?" 

"Gale... Please... Believe me..." She pleaded. "Is not about trust, or friendship, or even being a great team... We will always be that, even if we don't marry each other... It's about me not wanting to live a life of worry and insecurities... And taking care of just myself, for once. You deserve somebody that would love you and give you as many children as you wish, and that's not me!" She swallowed thickly, her throat was constricting with sorrow. "Plus... I think... I think the kind of relationship that I want, won't Sit well with you... But is the only one I'm willing to have... A No attachments relationship, no formal toasting, just me and him..." she said almost whispering.

"What is that even mean? A No Attachments relationship?" He asked frowning. 

"I want to be with somebody... we just, will not get married" She said more firmly.

"Where the hell did that come from, Katniss? Is there an actual person that would agree to this idea of yours?" she took his angry outburst as a sign that it was time to go into town to trade their wears. 

"Truthfully, there is somebody I will like to ask if that type of relationship would be something he was interested in having... But, the honest answer, is that I don't know. I've just been thinking about it, and right now is the only thing I'd be comfortable with..."

"There's somebody else then?" He said sadly, "Who?"

"It'a not important Gale, I'm not sure I can give anyone romantic love, not you, not him... Not anyone. I just want to see Prim safe and out of the hell called the reaping, then I'll see if I can be something different..." She said tiredly. Gale surprisingly did not pressed the issue, although he seem obviously angry. She knew, it was the time constriction that had helped her this time, but soon, he wouldn't let go as easily. 

"Now, I need to go see Peeta... and deliver his rabbit, and wish him luck." she said his name breathily, and she hoped Gale didn't catch on her blunder. "I also got to go see Madge, to drop off her Strawberries and wish her good luck!" She added hastily.

"You sure have a lot of townie friends Catnip... I didn't know you were on a first name basis with the Baker's boy." This grated her the wrong way... Her mother was an ex townie, and her sister sure looked like one too, but she just gritted her teeth and said,

"The Mellark boys are good people, we have been on a first name basis for a while, all of us! I mean Prim and I. And Madge is my only friend in school, I didn't choose her because of what side of the district she came from, she was just there, and she has always been nice and has never judged me! I like my friends, as much as I like you, Gale... Now, let's go. We're gonna be late!" 

Inside the fence, they separated, he took most of the game to be traded at the Hob, and she went to trade a few things in town. Her rounds were fast. She was knocking the door at the Mayor's house in no time. Madge answered it, and she grinned at her friend. 

"Hi Katniss!" 

"Madge!" The blond girl, did something uncharacteristic and hugged her friend, tightly. 

"After today, we will never have to be scared for our own life on reaping day!" Madge cried a little into her friend's shoulder, Katniss just patted her soothingly. "I know, you still have Prim to worry about... But, I know she will be fine! You have done an amazing job at protecting her!" She said straightening up, and wiping her eyes dry. Mr. Undersee, came to the door, and his smile shone as soon as he saw Katniss there, his daughter'a only, real friend through the years. He was fond of Katniss, that was for sure.

"Katniss! Happy Hunger Games! I know the Odds, will always be in your favor! would like to come in?" He said enthusiastically.

"Oh! No... I'm here just to wish Madge good luck today, and to present her with this! I picked them freshly for her today!" She beamed at them, when handing them the quart of berries, Madge's grin stretched bigger if that was possible.

"Oh! My favorite! Thank you!" the girls hugged again, this time it wasn't awkward, just full of caring. Mr Undersee tried to pay for the fruit, but Katniss refused vehemently at least three times, before the man relented. She then, said her good byes, and walked fast to the bakery. 

She walked by the front sidewalk, saw Peeta working the till, and as soon as he saw her, his smile adorned his features. She faintly heard him yelled that he was taking his break, and she knew he would want to meet her not at the back door, but down the road, at their alley behind the shoe shop. So when the back door of the bakery opened, she quickly, passed the rabbit to Rye without saying a word and quickly turned around to leave, as an afterthought, she gave him two squirrels, and left almost skipping, Rye laughed, then yelled at her retreating form, 

"Good luck today... Sis!" She turned in her heel to hear more than see, the door being slammed shut. She hurried to their meeting place, and her heart stammered faster the closer she got.

As usual, when she turned the corner, a hand pulled her into the shadowy side of the alley, and strong arms surrounded her lithe body, she giggled. 

"Hi there beautiful! Did you get my message?" He said while kissing her softly on the lips. 

"Yeah... The... Cupcakes... Delicious... Vanilla... favorite..." She tried to say while he kissed her.

"I know... I wanted you to have something sweet for breakfast... too bad I can't taste any of it on your mouth!" He said nuzzling her neck, and she tensed against his arms. 

He took a step back, to look at her, with those piercing blue eyes, that felt like he could x-ray her. "What's wrong?" he asked concerned. She fidget a bit. And decided to just come clean and see where this went.

"Gale kissed me, right after I ate it..." She said meekly, she suddenly found the hem of his sleeve very interesting. "Please don't be mad... I didn't even want to kiss him. I only want to kiss you." She said faintly.

He didn't say anything for a while, and she started to get anxious about his silence, looking up at him, she practically begged, "Peeta... Please say something"

"What else happened?" He asked, his voice even and emotionless.

"Well, we hunted, and gathered and fished, and then he proposed before we left the woods" she tried to sound as even as he had, but without success.

"And what did you say?" His voice was softer now, his hand caressing her face lovingly. "When he proposed?" 

"Um... I-I told him the truth... I-I kind of told him, that there was somebody..." his eyes widen infinitesimally, so she quickly pressed on, "I also told him, That I didn't wanna get married to anyone, or have children..." She saw his for head furrowed and his face fall, she just took a deep breath and plowed on, "I will not become my mother! and I won't let you go down into the mines either. I will not get pregnant, I will not give birth, and raise my babies, so the Capitol can take them away from me and kill them in national television... I won't do it, Peeta... Not for him, not even for you." She said, and just when he wiped her tears she realized she was crying. 

"I understand..." he said quietly. "I'm not sure I want to have children either, not after my childhood. I know you will never be like my mother, and I would never mistreat a kid, no matter who or where it came from... I just couldn't bear to see a child of mine suffering." he said calmly, he was stroking her hair tenderly, "About the marriage... I'm not going to lie to you, my dream is still making you my wife, but, we have time to figure that out!" 

"Peeta? What... What would you say, if instead of getting married... We just... um... Lived together? You know, no strings attached, no children, no toasting... we would still... Um... Be, intimate, but not formally married" she stammered her proposition.

"I don't know Katniss... I care too much about you, to just have a casual dalliance with you. I want the commitment, the obligations, the good and the bad, I want it all... I want it to be real"

"We would still have sex, any time you want!" She offered hopefully. His mouth twitched, but he just shook his head. 

"Do you know how bad would it look like, if we didn't get married, but we started sleeping together, Katniss? Half the Seam would wanna lynch me, then half the Town would try as well!" He chuckled mirthlessly, "No, Katniss, I'm not just going to fuck you without marrying you... We won't have children, but we will have a toasting..." he looked at his beat up watch, he took a deep breath, "My brake is up... Gotta go back to work, and then to get ready. It's 11 o'clock, by the way." he leaned in to give her a quick kiss, and disentangled his arms, from around her. He took a moment to look at her, as if he wanted to say something else, but he thought better of it, and smiled at her sweetly. "Good luck out there today, babe. I will come to your house, after dinner. I'll bring some dessert alright?" he leaned down to kiss her. 

"Alright." She returned the kiss. they started to walk away from each other, but then she remembered something,

"Peeta!" She cried out, and ran after him, he turned around looking puzzled. Then he saw her smile spreading as she ran towards him. "Here!" She produced something from her bag, and gave it to him: a small green shoot, with tiny white flowers hanging from it. "Good luck present?" She said and kissed him fully on the lips. He smiled broadly at her. 

"Thank you, sweetie! I had never seen real ones before... they're lovely... Just like you!" He kissed her softly again. 

After, he had showered, and changed into his best hand me down clothes, he placed the small stick of Katniss flowers inside the chest pocket of his shirt, he felt proud, she had given him permission to publicly display his claim on her... Or was it the other way around? Either way, he had planed a special surprise for her, for that night, he hoped when she saw it with her own eyes, she would change her mind an be ok with him being a miner, and accepting his marriage proposal.

Sadly, none of their plans for after the reaping, where to happen. For when she started chanting in her mind, 'Not my name, not my name, not my name' they called someone else's name, for whom she had no more choice than to volunteer for. His strangled cry of despair was overshadowed, when the male tribute's name was called as first timer Vick Hawthorne... and he would have taken anybody's place no matter what, but, the fact that a 12 year old, beloved friend of the love of his life, was to fight for his life made it all the more significant, he was not about to allow that kid to die in that arena. That was Peeta's job! 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The first day, was unbearable. She would not speak to him at all, she just sat turning over in her fingers the gold Mockingjay pin her friend Madge had given her as a parting gift; she had tried to refuse it, but Madge insisted, saying "You are allowed a token from your district... Plus, you gave me a good luck gift that worked... Maybe this will do it for you!"

During the first day in the train, she had been angry at him for volunteering, that night they had a fight, they yelled at each other, he threw stuff around the compartment and broke them, then, after crying bitterly together, they ended up making out in the couch. The next day, she went back to ignoring him during breakfast, until Haymitch Abernathy, lone surviving Victor of District 12, made his appearance, and the both of them ganged up on him when they got fed up with his drunken ways. As truce, He promised to stay sobered enough to help them during the games, if they stopped sticking their noses in his drinking business. 

It was clear to Haymitch soon enough, that the boy was completely and absolutely head over heels, for the girl. It was too bad, she wasn't as committed to the relationship as the boy was. Not that she was different to his advances, it was that she seem to want to keep him at arms length, for some reason. The kids, followed instructions well enough, they were both attractive in their own ways, they were smart and quick, and where she was more action driven, he was more of a logical planner and to Haymitch's dismay he was also a talker. He went to work in cultivating their strengths... The girl was a nightmare.

Their individual scores where great, amazing even, he was so very strong, and good at hand to hand combat, while she was quick on her feet, and excelled at ranged weapons, although her knife throwing skills seem to have become stagnant. Peeta got an 8 as his personal score, while Katniss got an 11, due to a mishap where she shot at the roasted pig, the Gamemakers where admiring instead of her performance.

During their interviews, Cinna, the up and coming new stylist for District 12 dressed her in fiery red, Peeta had never seen her like that before, with the make-up, the hair... he was finding it hard to keep his eyes from roaming back to her. The cameras had noticed, his lovesick stare, and when Caesar Flickerman asked him if he had a sweetheart waiting for him back home, his answer just won the Capitol over, and they where both dubbed: The Star-crossed-lovers of District 12.   

"District 12 had two volunteers this year! The lovely miss Everdeen spoke of her younger sister, and why she volunteered for her, but, what about you? You were not related to the other male tribute!" was the first serious question of the interview, after they had opened with a few jokes about the differences in the showers.

Peeta gave a small shrug with a sideways smile. "It was the right thing to do... I knew of the kid through a dear friend of mine... and you know what they say, help when, and if, you can..." He shrugged again.

"It sounds to me like you are very invested in this friendship! Tell me, is the friend a pretty girl?" Peeta laughed but said nothing. "So, Peeta... Is there a special lady back home?" Asked the honeyed voice of the forever host of the Hunger Games.

"No... Not really. No girl is waiting for me back home." He answered with a sad smile, his palms were sweaty. And unconsciously he looked at his mentor, who gave him a tiny little nod of encouragement.

"Are you sure? Handsome fellow like you? Surely you have them lined up outside your house!" The showman'a deep laugh filled the small studio set, and Katniss felt bile rising up, she couldn't believe how much she hated the idea of Peeta having a line of admires waiting for him outside the bakery. Her face morphed into a deadly scowl, that the cameras caught immediately. Haymitch smirked, looking at the monitors, the girl was not very good at keeping a straight face when emotions were involved.

Peeta laughed with Caesar, as if he found the idea preposterous, but then, He answered in a serious tone, not really meeting the TV host's gaze. "There-There is this one girl, I had a crush on her ever since I can remember... I thought she didn't know I existed, until my brother... ended up visiting her house, and we were... forced to talk?" His voice was hesitant, while recounting their first meeting, "After that first day, I realized, for me it was deeper than a mere teenage infatuation... I actually proposed to her twice in the last... 10 months? But, she was wise with her answers... the first time she flat out said No, then she told me I should think better of it, because, I would've most likely have to become a miner if we were to get  married, and she was worried that a soft baker boy wouldn't last a day down the mines... She was probably right at the time, I have been studying about coal mining with rapt attention ever since! Then the second time I asked her to marry me, she simply said to ask her again after the reaping... Of course, I never got the chance to do that." The audience had been eerily silent all throughout his small speech, and now there were 'aaawwws' and 'Oooohs', this was the saddest love story they've ever heard. Katniss felt like her heart was going to leave her chest any moment now, and she stared at the shiny floor trying to control her breathing.

"Well... I'll tell you what, Peeta!" Caesar said clapping his back encouragingly, "You go out there, and win this thing, and you go home, bring her a nice ring, and propose again! She won't be able to say No again!" He laughed loudly, "What do you think folks?" He asked at the audience, which erupted in cheers and applauses, but Peeta's face fell, Caesar noticed.

"Umm... well... Winning will not help my cause at all." He said bitterly. 

"And, why ever not? You'd be a Victor! A Hero!" 

"Well, Caesar..." He said completely deflated, "The problem is, that if I win, she won't be home waiting for my return... She's not home now." He paused a moment to take a shuddering breath, then his intense blue eyes looked directly at the camera, Katniss felt her eyes swell with tears and her heart quicken, she buried her chin into her chest praying nobody could see her. "Caesar... I won't be able to propose to anyone, because... the woman I want to marry, came here with me"

The games had been a terrible experience, the arena was a truly horrifying desert, littered with lizard mutts, that spat acid, or if they bite they injected venom into their victim. There were tiny caves along a ridge on one side of the arena, most of the tributes learned to avoid anything dark and damp, as mutt vipers tended to lurked there. The cornucopia was seated in the middle of the only oasis in the arena, it had luscious vegetation with plenty of drinking water, game, and fruit... Of course it was surrounded by mutts, lizards, vipers, and ant size scorpions that didn't kill, but caused tremendous amounts of pain and swelling, and would target you relentlessly. 

This year's tributes were scrawny as ever, but they were mostly older kids, maybe because the previous year, the odious twist for the Quarter Quell called for most of the tributes to be between the ages of 12 and 13, 'To remind the revels, that they were but inexperienced children, going against the might of the Capitol', the 75th Hunger Games han not been very popular with the districts, but the Capitol found it exciting to see the jungle like arena, with it's clock shape, and spinning center, most kids got killed because they never figured out the arena's traps, the winner was the kid from 4, because he could fish and stayed by the beach as much as he could, he wasn't as graceful or pretty as Finnick Odair, but he had survived.  The youngest tribute this year, was a 15 year old boy, that looked like he could ripped someone's arms clean off its joint... then again all carriers looked like that.  

Peeta and Katniss hadn't been on speaking terms when they left the training center, she was still angry at him for volunteering, and he was stubborn, saying he would make sure she went home safe and sound, the drop that spilled the cup, was when he told her, she should go home and marry Gale. She was livid, and told him to go screw himself, then she locked herself up in her room until Cinna came to collect her to take her to her hovercraft. None of that mattered, when the second day, Peeta found her being strangled by the boy from 8 for a bottle of water. He easily picked the kid up and tossed him away from her, unluckily for 8, he landed on a nest of vipers, he didn't have a chance to react when there venom had robbed him from life. Katniss cried on Peeta's chest, and when she realized he wasn't responding, she stayed with him until he snapped out of his guilt ridden trance. They stayed together after that. 

On the fourth day, Peeta had tackled one of the carriers, after they attacked them, they fought for a good 15 minutes just with their fists. Katniss was fighting off her own attacker, a girl from 1 that was 3 times heavier than her, and carried a long knife. Peeta's assailant laid unconscious on he ground, he was carrying a bow and quiver with 10 arrows, he snatched them away from his limp body, the boy was still breathing. Then he went to help Katniss, she had managed to stay on her feet most of the fight, throwing rocks at the other girl when she could.

"Katniss, No!" Peeta yelled as she picked up another rock, it wasn't a rock at all, it was a lizard, she still chucked it at 1, and hit her square in the chest, the mutt bit the girl upon contact, the sight was terrifying, the girl's body started to convulse and foam formed at her mouth, her eyes rolled back into her skull, and Katniss stood there frozen with eyes wide and scared, Peeta hoisted her up over his shoulder like she was a sack of flour, and ran for it. Not a minute later they heard the cannon go off, soon followed by another one. It occurred to Peeta, that not killing someone, but leaving them unconscious on the mutt infested ground, was the same thing as killing them, he only shook his head and kept on running until they reached the cornucopia. 

It had been short of a miracle that they had made it there, so the shock had passed, they filled their water bottles, collected fruit and since Katniss now had a weapon, she went hunting... She was still shaken up by the images of the dying girl from 1, it had been a horrible thing to watch, knowing that you caused it, was even worse. 

By day 9, Peeta had three kills, two semi accidental, one was a mercy killing. Katniss had 2, neither was accidental nor merciful. She had actually shot an arrow right into the boy from 4's chest as he charged at them after badly hurting the girl from 11, who Peeta had to finish off as she begged to be taken out of the world of pain she was in. 

They had found a cave, that they learned how to mutt proof, they were sitting together, huddled under a thermic blanket and a sleeping bag. Early in the games they had scavenged around, and found backpacks from dead tributes, and some of them, especially the ones from the careers had some mutt repellant spray, that was now running low. The one good thing about this arena was, that people didn't trust what they saw from afar, mirages could be deadly, and fires would spontaneously start and go off at any given time, making a fire not a certain giveaway of your position, but always precautions had to be observed, they only lit fires for shorts amounts of times, and never in the same spot. They had had an amount of decent food, enough to give them energy and so they didn't starve, water was trickier to find. At the moment, their most pressing need was for sunscreen, maybe a hat... Katniss had learned to silently talk to Peeta, and he somehow had figured out that she had some sort of secret code with Haymitch, so they just worked together, he would follow her lead and soon be awarded with a parachute carrying whatever they needed. It was obvious, they were popular amount the Capitol sponsors, as the parachutes came when they were truly needed. 

They hadn't shared a kiss since the first night in the train on reaping day, but tonight, she's tired, and needs comfort, she leans her head on his shoulder, and he wraps a protective arm around her.

"Peeta... You said in your interview you have liked me since forever, and Rye told me once, that you were a small boy when you first mentioned my name at home... When exactly did forever start for you?" Her voice was so soft, he wondered if this was a conversation meant for just the both of them. He spoke equally soft.

"It was the first day of school, when we were five, you were wearing a red checkered dress, and your hair was in two braids instead of one..."

"How do you remember all this things about our childhood? All these details? Remember when I asked you how you knew when my birthday was, and you said it was because it was the first day you saw me wearing a single braid? It's crazy you remember all that!" She was in awe at his words, she definitely remember the dress because it got washed to rags after Prim used it.

"The single braid was not all that I saw that day to mark it as your birthday" he said with a little wrinkle between his brows, "I saw you pulling your little beat up wagon, out of the Justice Building, with tesserae stuff... Then I saw you do it every year after that on the same day" His frown had deepened.

"Oh..." she breathed out, "I guess, that would be a dead giveaway" she peered up at him, and squeezed his hand.

"I remember everything about, Katniss." He said touching the tip of her nose with the tip of his finger, "You are the one that weren't paying attention!"

"That's not true..." She said quietly, looking at him. He swallowed thickly, and continued with his original story.

"Well, my Father told me, how he wanted to marry your mother, when they were young, but she ran off with your dad, a miner..."

"What? No way! He didn't say that!" She sat up straight and twisted her torso to face him fully, her voice got higher, Peeta chuckled, and kissed her forehead, pulling her back to their previous position.

"Yeah, He did! He also told me, that the reason your mom, left town and married a coal miner instead of the district baker, was because, when your father sang, even the birds stopped to listen."

"Oh... Well... That part is true... Dad was an amazing singer." She said wistfully.

Peeta smiled lovingly at her, and squeezed her A little. "So are you, Sweetie." 

"I don't sing!" She spat.

"Oh really? Well, as it turns out, that very first day of school, I kept observing you, it was undeniable you were cute back then, so happy and chattery" she snorted, but it did sound like her before her father died, he fixed her with a pointed look and she stopped interrupting him, "During music assembly, the teacher asked if anyone knew the Valley song, and your hand shot up into the air, she made you stand on a stool in front of the class and you sang for us... And, I swear... Every. Single. Bird. Outside the window fell silent, then I knew... Just like your mother... I was goner." He looked down at her, her face was an unreadable mix of emotions.

"Peeta..." She said his name breathily and with such emotion, he felt like crying. "Why... Why did you volunteer? We will die in this arena, and all I ever wanted for you was to have a long, full life... To marry a nice merchant girl that could birth you children that looked just like you, and that would love just as much as I..." Her eyes widened as soon as the words left her mouth, did she just tell him that she loved him? How could she be so stupid? By the equally startled look in his confused face, it was obvious he had heard her, loud and clear.

"Katniss... What did you just...?" He whispered.

She jumped out of under the blanket, spooked. She couldn't love him, they were just Capitol TV rating fodder, one of them or both, were as good as dead. She needed to backpedal and fix this.

"I-I... What I meant to say..." She was desperate and wasn't thinking straight. "I don't want you to die here!" she cried, bitterly.

"And would you had rather have the Hawthorne boy here in my place?" he spat angrily, "I did what was right! That boy deserved to live a long, full, happy life as much as I did... Would you had rather see him suffer under the inclement sun, and running from mutts every minute of the day, or dying of thirst? Because I don't!" he yelled, now on his feet as well.

"Of course not! Why would I ever want that for any one, specially the Hawthornes? But, you would have volunteer regardless wouldn't you?" She yelled back at him. 

"Of course I would have! You were up there! On that stage! My whole life ended when the name Everdeen was called!" His voice was so loud it Eco in the cave.

"No it didn't! You could have just... Live on!" she was still yelling at him.

"No, Katniss... I couldn't..." He slumped back against the wall of the cave and let gravity pull him down to sit. All the anger had left his body. His voice was low and scratchy. "I had already applied for a job in the mines, I was leaving the bakery the day after the reaping. I had already gotten a house assigned to me, close to the fence by the meadow... I was going to ask your mother for your hand in marriage that night, I was going to take you over the house to show you where WE would live... it was a done deal for me, Katniss... Even if you had decided you still only wanted to move in with me without Toasting, it was a done deal." He wiped away a tear, his eyes trained on his dusty boots.

"But... I-I asked you... I asked you, repeatedly, not to become a miner..." Her voice was a small whisper. "I told you I couldn't lose you to the mines... Why would you do that to me? Why would you go and become a miner? I would have been with you regardless of what you did, but you were going to lose everything because of me! I... I..." she started sobbing, and out of the blue, landed on front if him on her knees, and started punching his chest with fury. "You asshole Peeta Mellark, you shouldn't have done that!"

"I did it because I love you!" He screamed at the top of his lungs, grabbing her wrists to stop her from hitting him. "I love you, with all I have... I don't care if my mother never speaks to me again, or if she disowned me, all I cared about was that I could be with you freely. I was going to fulfill my life long dream of marrying you, and since I knew my family wouldn't have approved I just decided to removed myself from there... It was for you, yes... But also for myself. And when I saw you up there, about to be plucked out of my life, I decided that I didn't want to live without you, and I won't. I will die in this arena, I will see that you're crowned Victor, and you can go home to your mother and Prim, and the rest of your friends. Apparently, no matter what I do, the odds are not on our favor... I won't ever make you my bride, I will never share a life with you. But I want you to live!" 

"Just stop!" She pleaded with him, "Please stop... Just don't. If you die here and I live, I will never leave this arena, my mind would stay trapped here..."

"Katniss, you are going home! And that's final! Your family depends on you, and I have no one, no body actually needs me, but you still have a shot at life, you can go back and... Marry G..." But she stopped him with her lips, before he could finish that sentence, because nothing good would come out of that. It was the first time in weeks they've kissed, and he tasted just the same, sweet and like home. He pulled her to straddle his lap, and they kissed with all the heat and the passion they had denied themselves since they left 12 behind. "I love you, Katniss..." He mumbled against her lips, and went back to kissing her. Not long after, they stopped, at the beeping sound of an incoming parachute, it contained sunscreen, sunglasses and two cooling rags. 

Peeta hugged Katniss, kissed her neck and then nuzzled it, his lips brushed her ear.

"I guess, the Capitol, likes romance!" He kissed her softly, and she sighed closing her eyes. Whatever the Capitol liked, she truly loved being in his arms again.

They woke up to the sound of screams closed by, followed by a cannon. She had no idea when she had fallen asleep, but it had been a full night of rest for the first time in weeks, she looked at him and found his blue eyes were alert, looking at the entrance of the cave; he brought his finger to his lip and signed to stay quiet, he creeped along the cave opening, and took a peek... He quickly came back to her side, she had packed away the blanket and sleeping bag, the rest of their stuff, were already in the backpack she had just hoisted up around her back, she was ready to sprint out of the cave at his word.

"I can't see anything... The shout was close though, too close for my liking, and whatever it was that kill her, is silent." He whispered.

She nodded, "I say we move... I'll go first with the bow, you go after me... Get your knife ready!" She loaded her bow, and he got his long knife out of the loop of his pants where it usually hang since they came across it. It turns out, he was very good with the knife, especially in close combat. But, not sooner they have left the relative security of their cave, the girl from 2 shouted gleefully:

"It's the Star-Crossed lovers! We got them now!" She yelled.

"I'll get Lover boy!" Responded the voice of the girl from 4. The boy from 2, the youngest tribute in the games this year, wasn't there, but that was hardly any consolation, the girls where bigger and heavier than Katniss, although they seem a bit malnourished, not that she and Peeta looked well fed, but they hadn't lost as much weight as the two careers had, maybe because they were more used to being hungry, or because Katniss hunted every time she could, they didn't know. Now was the time for running, not pondering. And run they did. 

The career girls overtook them soon, one of tackled Katniss to the ground, Peeta picked her by the middle and tried to wheeled her around and away from Katniss, but the girl got to them, and kicked him in the back of the knee, he lost hold of the first girl, Katniss had time to pick up her bow, and noc in a fresh arrow, she shoot the girl from 4 right as she was about plunge a knife into Peeta's chest, the girl from 2, yelled in surprise when Peeta punched her in the stomach, a cannon went off, and he looked up, terrified as he had not seem Katniss since he picked that careere off of her, he visibly relaxed as his eyes found her yanking her arrow out of 4's throat. 

"Grabbed their packs, let us move on!" She exclaimed, as soon as she saw him. They were collecting what they could, when his scream of pain and anguish filled the otherwise silent morning.

Katniss rushed to him, and saw with horror a viper's severed head attached to his pant leg, it's body shook in spams for a bit before stilling. 

"Peeta!" She cried, she didn't care if her voice betrayed her position, he had gotten bitten by that snake, and he was going to die a painful, slow death, unless she killed him, problem was, she couldn't do it. Not him. "Haymitch! Haymitch do something you bastard! Save him!" She demanded, looking up to the sky, jumping in place, with angry tears running down her cheeks.

"Katniss..." Peeta called weakly. "Baby, let's go back to the cave... The snake just grazed my skin, but it burns all the same..." He said faintly.

"What about 2?" she asked numbly.

"Leave her there... Something will get her sooner or later... If she wakes up before that, she won't know think we were stupid enough to fo back to the caves." he said with a smile, that he fought hard to keep from turning into a grimace.

"Ok... We will go slow" she said, and helped him up. They weren't very far from the caves, she chided a different one, a little higher off the ground, with a better viewing ventage. She sweeped it for mutts, and deemed it livable. She settled hI'm at the back, and went straight for his pants leg, she rolled it up as high as she could, and her heart fell... His skin only had a scratch, but it was pulsing red and full of pus already, she looked into the new backpacks they collected, and found a first aid kit, with antibiotic ointment and wipes soaked in rubbing alcohol, she desigfected the area as best she could. And applied the ointment, he hissed in pain at her touch, and she winced when he did. 

"How bad is it, Doctor Everdeen?" He said with a sad smile. "I know that face... And you had never used on me while tending to my injuries before." His hand started to caress her cheek, and she couldn't contain the tears.

"I'm not sure... It looks infected, but you're still here, so no venom must have gone into your blood stream... Now, if we keep it clean, and try to stave off infection, we can probably fight fevers and you might get better again..." She sniffled. 

"Katniss... I know I'm as good as dead, even if my mother is not a healer, I can tell when a wound is beyond help..." He said softly, taking a hold of her disheveled braid, she placed a hand on his chest, and shook her head.

"No... I will figure something out... I will take care of you, you will get better, you will be fine!" She wept. 

"Babe, by my count, we only 5 tributes left in the arena, the two from 2, the boy from 11 and us... Hopefully female 2 will get taken care off for us by the arena, and the males from 2 and 11 kill each other... You will be Victor... You will go home... You will have a shot at life... I just wish... I wish I had talked to you sooner..." 

"NO! Stop it! Do not talk like that... You have to live! We were supposed to live together in a little house by the meadow, Remember? You and I... We were supposed to share a bed, and life, and learn to love each other... Please, don't give up now!" She begged.

"Sweetheart... Listen to me..." He said, and she spat,

"Don't call me Sweetheart... You sound like Haymitch, when you say it!" He laughed faintly clutching his leg a little.

"Fine... Darling, my love... Katniss, sweetie... Hear me out, alright?" She just crossed her arms over her chest, and looked at the cave entrance, she slowly sat down, not facing him. He took it as permission to speak. "Babe... I have loved you most of my life, I have dreamed about being with you since I was old enough to want a toasting... Now that I know, I'm at death's gates... I want to say so many things... I want you to be happy, I want you to go back home and lead a full life, stay single, or get married, watch ever you want, just... Do it... I wish I had had the nerve to talk to you sooner... To kiss you sooner, because every time we kissed, was like touching heaven for a moment, every time it had you in my arms, it was like all my prayers had been answered... And I so wished, we had had more time together..." He was getting too pale, his voice was getting softer and softer... She was starting to panic. She was going to lose him.

"My biggest regret... Was not asking you again... I should have, in the train, or the training center... I should have... Told you about the house sooner..." He coughed and when she touched his cheek, she found his skin burning. 

She sobbed, "Haymitch... Please..." She whispered a plea. "Help me..." She breathed. Peeta had stopped talking, she needed to get him talking again, so she knew he was still with her...

"Peeta, honey... I-I would've loved to live with you, can you tell me about the house?" she said softly, shaking his arm.

He smiled, and shook his head... "It was a house from the Seam... Just like your mother's. But, I wanted to bring you there as my wife, not as my... Girlfriend." 

"Then ask me!" she said frantically, he was trying to close his eyes.

"Ask you what?" He said with a knowing smirk.

"You told me it was your biggest regret... And did tell you to ask me after the reaping... I'm still waiting, my answer is resting on my lips, Peeta... Ask me again!"

the smirk, never left his face, he tried to sit up, his eyes opened again, and he held her hand. "Katniss Everdeen... As my Last Wish... Will you marry me?" His voice was so sweet and soft, she cried a little, she nodded, and in true Katniss form, said,

"Ok!" He looked straight into her eyes

"So... You will allow it? Us to get married?" He asked amusedly.

"Yes! I'll allow it. I'll be your wife!" She answered with a breathy little laugh. The beeping of the incoming parachute was almost immediate, she jumped outside of the cave, and snatched the package before it hit the ground, she got disappointed to find a small more antibiotic ointment, granted it was a stronger grade of antibiotic, the small medicine tube, was nestled inside a square metal thing that she had not paid any attention too, but, while she was cleaning Peeta's wound again to apply the new medicine on it, he had been studying the contraption.

"It's a burner, it seems to be a one time use burner... It has a little gas container attached... Why would he send us something so utterly... Useless?" he said in a small voice. "We don't even have a pan to cook food in, and I'm not sure how for long this fire will burn... Unless..."

She looked at him, she could see the small burner he was turning in his hands, she could also see the wheels turning in his head. Maybe he was thinking that it could be used as some kind of weapon, or explosive device; She wasn't so sure, but then and idea popped into her head. She quickly wrapped new bandages around his injury, and told him as fast as she could, she thought she knew what it was for. She rushed to rummage in their supplies, she found what she had been looking for, half a loaf of grainy bread they had left. The had inventoried it and a couple of apples and some dried fruit, the day before as part as their food stores, of course Haymitch would know they still had it, and she knew immediately what he wanted them to do with it.

She looked up at Peeta, bread clutched in her hand, his gaze was a little sharper than a few minutes before, but there was confusion etched in his eyes. She handed him the bread, he took it silently, waiting for her explanation. 

"I... I think... I think your wish has been granted, sweetie." She said in a soothing voice, while caressing his hair tenderly. She had a barely there smile, he recognized from stolen minutes at the school cafeteria or next to her locker, when he would make her a question that pleased her.

"What do you mean?" He asked, his voice still weak, he took her hand and brought it his lips to kiss. 

"Well, we have bread... And a burner..." She smiled a little more openly, and when his eyes widen in understanding, she have a very small giggle. 

"Katniss?... Are you sure you want to do this? Here, right now?" He asked incredulously, she laughed, a real laugh, and she nodded. 

"But, if we do this..." She said more seriously, "If we Toast... You can't die, I won't marry you, to then become a widow on the same breath, you hear me?" She said without a shred of levity in her gaze or words, her hands were fisted on his windbreaker flaps. 

"I swear I'll fight this infection to stay with you!" He nodded eagerly. "I wont die, I will enjoy my life long dream for as long as I'm allowed! Married life with you... my beautiful wife!" He said with a goofy grin. She laughed again, and kissed his lips quickly.

"Here... you take care if the bread, while I see if we have any matches in the bags" she handed him a small knife, and she went through their supplies once more, once she found the matches, she came to sit next hI'm again. She was surprised to see that some color had returned to his cheeks, and he was sweating his fever off, that was good, the medicine had been working, just not quick enough for him to be out of the woods.

"So, um... How do we turn the gas on?" She asked biting her lip while turning the burner around.

"There is a little key at the base if the little gas tank on the underside. I think you have to turn it to release the gas... There diesnt seem to be a way to close it back again, so, we will have to let it burn completely." She nodded in understanding, she gave him the matches and she proceeded to get the burner ready.

"Alright... We can roast the apples after we are done with the toast, it should have to suffice as our wedding meal..." she said thougfully.

"Oh... Sure... That will be fine... You can have them... I'm not hungry." He said wrinkling his nose, and she looked at him with wide eyes, they hadn't eaten anything all day, it was now about 3 in the afternoon, she had been starving for hours, if he wasn't hungry it meant his infection wasn't getting better as she thought.

"We will see... You do have to eat something though." She kissed his forehead. He didn't answer, but lighted the match as soon as she had placed the burner on the cave floor.

The fire ignited in a puff. He scooted over, closer to her and their small fire, they both set their sliced bread on the fire, and waited a few moments, they smiled at each other sweetly, and when their toast was ready, fed each other a piece, followed by vows of faithfulness, and eternal love (in his case), to care for one another in sickness or health, and nurtured and help each other, until death made them part. She thought bitterly, that the parting was closer than she cared to acknowledge. They were married, by the traditions of their district. They kissed long and languidly to seal their union. 

"I love you Wife!" He said when they separated. She couldn't make the words come out of her mouth, so she kissed him once more. And only said.

"Me too!" He smiled at her. Another beeping sound, this parachute carrying a small feast, her favorite Capitol food: Lamb stew on rice, dinner rolls, and veggies. She devoted her food, but him merely took a few spoonfulls if the meal, she was worried, but she put on her brave face, to share in her husband's joy. 

About an hour later, she had been changing his bandages, and applying a new layer of antibiotics, his wound looked more like a deep cut now, it was red and pulsing all around. She felt her stomach lurched, when she touched the sorrounding are of the cut, and he yelped in pain. He was getting worse, maybe there had been trace amounts of poison in that bite after all, because this had nothing to do with the infection. 

But before she could think, say, or do anything, two cannons sounded in quick succession. 

"Only three of us left." Came his faint sigh. "Maybe even less by nightfall" He said, and her eyes snapped back at his, he was smiling softly, leaning on the cave wall, a single tear rolled down her cheek before she could stop it, and he wiped away.

"Peeta..." She whispered 

"Come here" he took her hands and pulled her into his lap. She didn't cry, but she held onto his neck for a very long time. He rubbed soon thing circles on the small of her back. 

"I wish we had... Give into... temptation back home... Remember how we would get worked up, but you always stopped before going too far?" She whispered into his neck. He chuckled.

"I told you I was not going to do that without a toasting, didn't I?" He said into her hair. 

"Yeah, but, now you are too sick to do anything..." she said frustratedly. He laughed again.

"Well, miss Everdeen, I didn't know you were so set into becoming intimate with me, I have to say... I'm flattered... And a bit mad at myself for not acting back then, but strangely proud of myself at the same time... You give me very contradicting emotions some times!" He said as he kissed her forehead.

"That would be, Mrs Mellark to you, sir!" she wrinkled her nose "Although, I'm bit sure I want to be call that... Mrs Mellark is your mother..."

He laughed, "Mrs Everdeen-Mellark, then?" She just gave him a look.

"Now I'm both our mothers! No thank you! Just... Katniss Mellark will be fine" she mused, "I told you before how I felt... I would have moved in with you right away if you had asked me to." She said looking down at her hands. "I wasn't sure I wanted to get officially married, but I never doubted I wanted to be with you in that way." She said shyly. "Now... We never will." She gave a shuddering breath.

"I'm sorry... I really am" he said and hugged her to his chest. He was warmer than usual, his fever was coming back. He was slowly dying.

To stave again her tears, she turned in his arms, and kissed him. The kiss intensified quickly, all the longing, regret and desire they felt pooling into it. It was a surprise to her, that he still could harden down there, but she could feel him under her rear, he steadily stiffen and grew little by little. without breaking their lips apart, she maneuvered around and straddled him, he was almost fully erected now, and she grinder her hips into him. He gasped, and his body was ready. 

with another chuckled, he said into her lips, "Well, it seems you underestimated my teenage hormones and body urges..." he kissed her again, and she giggled, "I think my body wants this no matter our circumstances!" 

"Do you want to?" She asked, and moved her hips again. 

He groaned, "Yes! I want to!" He said with a deepness in his voice aha had very seldom heard. Only when he brusquely stopped their kissing and caressing behind the school grounds. 

She jumped off of him, and he growled her name. "Just a second!" she pulled their sleeping bag and unrolled it quickly on the floor, she then made quick work if her pants and shoes. It was dark outside by now, and the small stove had stopped burning a long while back, but she was sure they had night vision cameras all around the arena, she was not going to have her first time be openly filmed, she would hide under the covers of her sleeping bag, she folded their thermic blanket and had Peeta sit on it, so he would have to sit on the cold rock floor of the cave, she brought the plush sleeping bag around them both to cocoon them, and straddling his lap, kissed her new husband, hard and wanting. He responded in kind. 

His hands kept going up and down the length of her folded legs, her skin was so soft, he couldn't get enough if the feeling, she undid the zipper of his windbreaker jacket, and although she didn't remove it, she let her hands wander under his loose fitting t-shirt, his chest wasn't as hard as she thought he'd be, but the main thing she noticed was how hot he actually was, fever had caught up with him again. She kissed his neck, willing her tears to not spill over. After they both had their fill caressing and exploring each other's bodies without removing their tops, he leaned into her and whispered something only for her ears, she giggled and blushed furiously, then nodded, he smiled at her, a few moments that were mostly hiden from the cameras happened, in seconds, all that could be heard were tiny little gasps, a louder moaned, sighing, panting, and the sound of swoshing sleeping bag material.

They kept their mouths busy with each other, it kept them from making any loud sounds. Until it was to much for him to take. His head fell backwards and hit the cave wall behind him, he kept trying to keep his throaty growls in check, but he couldn't help it, when at the end her name slipped past his lips with a loud grunt. Her breathing was ragged, she just hid her face in the crook of his neck and slight movements could be perceived, out of their protective cloak, and soon it was her that could not stifled the moans, she was desperate to hide them, she bit down part of his shirt, to keep from screaming, and then she was still. 

He said something in her ear again, and both her arms went around his neck, she sat up straighter, and her words, were loud enough for the cameras to pick it up, it wasn't intentional. 

"I love you too, Peeta, my husband..." Her voice was trembling, their would be curtain fell around her hips, and their upper bodies where visible now, she was still straddling him. "I'm yours... Forever... I-I think, I had always known that I belonged with you... And I do too, wish we had more time." He cupped her face, and kissed her lovingly.

The blaring sound of the national anthem filled the whole arena, Katniss gathered the sleeping around her, and gingerly stood up, leaving him exposed, until he quickly brought his pants back on top of his lap. Katniss leapt to the mouth of the cave, and saw the projections of the fallen tributes up in the sky. The two female careers faces were up there, followed by the boy from 11, that left them two and the last male career, the 15 year old built like a bull.

She bit her lip, and returned to sit next to Peeta, who was already fully dressed. He helped passed her her clothes, and she wore her white cotton underwear under the sleeping bag, then put on her pants discarding her view blocker. She put on her socks and boots, and Peeta woot and cheered at the faint sound outside their cave, she inched out to see where it was, it was just out of her arms reach, so she squatted and stretched until she had secure it, but then, a knife whistled past her face, it nicked her on the ear.

She yelp in surprise, and then called to Peeta, he was already struggling to his feet, his long knife in hand, stupidly she had left her bow back inside, he grabbed it and tried to tossed it at her, but then, the career boy, propelled himself forward, knocking all her air out, and laying her flat on her back, with a surged of adrenaline, Peeta dove and rolled the boy off of Katniss, they were throwing punches everywhere, Katniss hadn't regain her breathing yet, and she kept coughing and doubling up in pain. Only a scream from Peeta prompted her to action, she rolled onto her stomach, and took her bow, she tried to find her quiver, but she was disoriented, curiously, the cave wasn't as dark as it should have been, light was shining from outside, and for the looks of it, it was as the midday sun was high, up in the sky, instead of the moon as it had been not two minutes ago. 

She saw her arrows spilled all over the ground; she picked up one and loaded her weapong, ready to shoot, both boys were blond, same size, similar jackets... Then she saw his bandaged leg... She took aim, but she saw movement out of the corner of her eye, a lizard, or two... Three... five... she list count of how many lizards where trying to come into the cave, she now remembered, they didn't spray any mutt repelant on that day, and the stuff the used to keep them from coming into the cave, was probably wearing off as well... She started shooting at the mutts, but they were too many, and she was down to one arrow, she turned around to see the boy bury a dagger like knife, in Peetas already injured leg, his scream was loud and heartbreaking, her arrow found it's bullseye in the boys heart. He slumped on top of Peeta, and he was too weak to kick him off of himself, so she pulled and heaved and got him off for him, with very great effort, she got the boy'a body out of the cave, she rolled him on top of the lizards there, and soon saw the mechanical arm of the hovercraft collect him. It was just the Star-Crossed lovers now. She had no way of helping him. 

She held him in her arms, he was bleeding copiously, she tried to make a tourniquet, but she wasn't sure if she did it right. The lizards were surrounding them now, ready to attack. In between sobs, she begged him to stay with her, he was fading fast, then she decided. 

She extended her arm to a lizard, it came to her curiously, but didn't bite her, she said softly, at the her almost unconscious husband, "When you get home... Take care of Prim for me. I love you!" She kissed his forehead. And brought the lizard'a head to her neck. 

"STOP!" It was the familiar voice of Claudius Templesmith, Katniss froze, she looked down at the group of mutts, vipers, and scorpions had joined the lizards, none of them were moving. Katniss saw the lizard in her hand and tossed away from her, as if she has just noticed it was a deathly critter to be holding so close to her body. Claudius spoke hurriedly again. "By the laws of the great country of Panem, when two individuals willingly enter a marriage, and consummate their vows to each other, they don't longer are to be viewed as two separate people, instead, they have come to form two halves of a whole unit, indivisible. As reviewed by our lawmakers, the costumes and marriage rituals known in District 12 as the Toasting, is admissible as binding marriage, although not legal, to the eyes of your district you are now one married unit. Is with that understanding, that you two shall now be considered one, It is my honor, to Present to Panem, their new Victors! I give you Katniss and Peeta Mellark, the tributes from District Twelve, Victors of the Seventy Sixth Annual Hunger Games!" Peeta had vaguely opened his eyes, still to weak for anything else, Katniss eyes were wide and full of tears, she still couldn't understand what was going on, Peeta reached up, to touch her face with the tip of his fingers, when she looked down at him her eyes were shocked,

"We're going home, sweetie!" his voice was hoarse and dry, but he managed a tiny smile, 

"We... We... We are going home, Peeta... Together?" She asked still not believing, nor understanding it.

"Yes, baby... We are!" She giggled and he weakly chuckled in response. They tried to stand up awkwardly, his leg was hurting him too bad, and he was too pale, he had lost too much blood. He couldn't really put any weight on his leg, she puffed and huffed, and dragged him outside the cave, the mutts, had parted for them, leaving a small path, in the direction of the open desert. A hovercraft descended, just in time for Peeta to pass out. 

Once in the hovercraft, she clanged to his body, until he was yanked away from her clutches, she went into hysterics when a group of doctors mobbed him, and she could no longer see him, someone came behind her and injected her with a sedative, while she was hitting and kicking the glass door step separating her from him, the last she remember after everything went black, was she screaming his name.

Two days passed before she was allowed to see her husband, his leg was so damaged by the poison and the stabbing, they had to amputate it below the knee. She cried with him when he woke up from surgery. She blamed herself, he tried to tell her she actually saved his life. 

A week later he was released from the hospital, they attended his Physical Therapy together every day for two hours for the next week, until they were scheduled to be interviewed by Caesar Flickerman again, and then... They would go back home, to District 12. They had been awarded one house in Victor's Village, because they were considered ONE person before the law. They didn't refute, the same law had applied for them to be named co-victors, and they were going to move in together if they hadn't been reaped anyway. It made no difference to them, except, they decided that Prim could come live with them if she wanted to. 

The night before the interview, Haymitch brought them both to the roof, where the wind was so strong, no Capitol bug could pick up their conversation.

"You two are in deep trouble... Snow is very angry with the both of you. The stunts you've been pulling since the reaping volunteering for strangers... Then showing them up, with their own laws on marriage, to become the first and only co-victors in history... None of that has sit well with the higher ups!"

"We didn't know anything about the laws concerning marriage!" Katniss spat.

"It doesn't matter Sweetheart! The thing is, you are both in danger, so are your families, and don't her me wrong, someone will pay for this!" 

"What do we do then?" Asked Peeta resolute.

"Be a good, complying little Victor. You are married now, you had sex on national TV, if you get asked to do it again, you comply, if you get asked to do it in front of people, you comply. You will be expected to produce at least one child, and mark my words, he or she, will be as good as dead once born."

"Haymitch..." Katniss fell to her knees in a heap, and started crying, "I-I-I can't... I can't do that, I can't give them a child for them to slaughter... Please, Haymitch... What can we do to save our loved ones and our future baby?" She was grasping his hands desperately, she wasn't pregnant yet, and she already loved her potential child. Peeta'a arms were around her in an instant. And she felt his body quiver with tears.

"There is a way..." Haymitch whispered even lower. "But we can't talk here. It's too risky." Peeta saw a dangerous glint in his mentor's Seam eyes, he knew right away, how did he ended up a Victor, for those eyes spoke of conning and lack of fear, Katniss saw her husband nod, and she trusted his instinct, she nodded as well, and slowly got up to her feet. 

Their interviews went as good as expected. The Capitol loved them. They loved their escapades more, so they already had scheduled the filming of their "honey moon" video, right after a lavished official wedding to be thrown at the Capitol right after their Victory Tour. They graciously kept their heads down, waving and smiling at their adoring fans... Her Mockingjay pin visible for all to see on her yellow dress, a revolution was brewing in the depths of their country. And they were ready to answer their call!