Work Text:
*Set 3 years into the future*
Higgins POV
I hear a knock at the Main House’s front door late at night just as I was about to head to the kitchen and make myself a fresh cup of coffee. The past few nights, I have not been able to sleep much. The past week had been a bit of a crazy one to say the least.
I open the door, a bit shocked to see Magnum standing in front of me wearing a simple white t-shirt that seems to have been worn for years, navy sweatpants, and slippers.
“Magnum?” I ask with an eyebrow raised.
“Can we talk?” Magnum asks. Not even a ‘Hi!’ or a ‘Good evening! Were you asleep?’
“You do realize that it is … oh,” I check my wrist watch, “one in the morning?” I lean against the door frame, crossing my arms, a bit embarrassed by my casual attire: a light purple tank top, joggers, and bare feet.
He avoids eye contact for a while, but then glances up at me. “Please,” he says, his voice quiet and serious.
This is not the Magnum that I know.
A bit bewildered at his vulnerable request, I look at him intently, squinting my eyes at his as if I could try to read that mess of a brain of his. Ideas of what he wants to talk to me about race around in my head.
“Sure,” I manage, my voice a bit more hoarse than I would like, and I nod.
I watch as he covers the space between us and walks past the door frame, his demeanor making me even more anxious. He doesn’t seem at all like himself tonight. His stride is less pompous, his stature less confident - though it is one in the morning.
“I was just, uh, about to make some coffee. Decaf, of course. Want some?” I ask him, making my way to the kitchen.
No answer.
“Magnum?” I ask quickly, rightfully frustrated.
“Huh?” he turns.
“Coffee?”
“Oh, yeah, thanks,” he sighs and sits down on the couch. He sounds a million miles away from me, completely lost in thought.
I start up the Keurig and pull two cups down from the cabinet above me, desperately trying to hide my confusion from Magnum’s surprise visit. Silence ensues the entire time I brew the coffee making this night even stranger. I watch him as he plays with his ring, the same one Rick, T.C, and Nuzo have.
Something is most definitely off.
“Cream? Sugar?” I ask him politely, testing to see whether his mind is still on planet Earth. This is all pretty weird to me, honestly. I cannot remember the last time I have been so gracious towards him. This new dynamic of not bickering is very concerning, very unlike us.
I catch his eyes briefly. “Black is fine, thanks,” Magnum speaks up, clearing his throat.
I add a bit of cream and sugar into my mug, deciding to splurge a bit to prepare myself for whatever is to come. I make my way to the couch, careful not to spill either cup. “Here,” I offer him and he accepts with a grunt of thanks.
“Thomas, is everything all right?” I ask him, growing more concerned at the immense silence.
He takes a sip of coffee, places it on the table in front of us, and sits back into the couch’s cushion. “I just …” he takes a deep breath, “I, uh …I wanted to talk,” he admits. I admire his honesty, but I am still a bit confused.
“Whatever about?” I ask before sipping my coffee, trying to hide my trembling hands.
M looks up at me and takes another deep breath, “Us.”
I nearly spit out my coffee. Nearly. Instead, I just choke on it, trying desperately to cough it away. Realizing the potential gravity of the conversation that is about to take place, I slowly rest my mug on the table once I catch my breath.
“Us?” Why is my voice so pathetically weak?
He sits up a bit straighter, leaning his elbows on his knees. “It’s just …” Why won’t he even make eye contact with me? “It’s been six years since we’ve known each other, right? Four since we’ve been partners, and -”
“A half,” I added, catching him off guard.
He looked up at me finally. “What?”
“It’s been four and a half years, not just four,” I corrected him, picking up my coffee again and leaning back, trying my best to act natural.
He smirks, “Four and a half years, yes. And a lot has happened since then.” I hold my cup in my lap, ready to listen. “We’ve been through thick and thin. I’ve saved your life, you’ve saved mine,” I nod in agreement. “I would say our relationship since I first met you has changed pretty dramatically.” I let out a quiet chuckle and a smile - he smiles too. “I feel as though I’ve gotten to know you really well. Piece by piece, I’ve put the master of a puzzle that you are together over these years. I still probably don’t know everything about you, but I feel like I know you better than anyone. I -”
He definitely prepared this speech. No way the Thomas Magnum that I know would say something like that on a whim. “Thomas,” I stop him, setting my cup down and sitting up, ready to face whatever is going on. “what are you getting at?”
“I’m leaving Hawaii.”
All of the sudden, I cannot breathe. “What?” I spit out. My world starts spinning around me and I feel my heart rate skyrocketing.
“Yeah,” he states matter-of-factly, his eyebrows revealing his shock at her response. “I’ve thought about it a lot, but I feel like it’s time.”
“What?” is all I can manage. I might as well be a broken record, but my mind is spinning so fast I can’t even keep up with what I am saying. I try to read him, try to understand where this is all coming from, but he remains distant. Far away from the conversation and far away from me.
“I just feel stuck,” he looks down at his hands, playing with his fingers. “Rick and T.C. have built a life for themselves. Wife, kids, house, the stereotypical happily married men. Although I have loved every second living here, I feel like it’s holding me back from finding all of that.”
Suddenly my eyes are welling up with tears. Dammit. I look away quickly, trying my best to hide them and reminding myself to keep my guard up. “Where is this coming from?” It comes out a bit harsher than I would’ve liked.
Out of the corner of my eyes, I see him sit up, obviously uncomfortable. I can see him trying to formulate the words he wants to say, but I hear nothing.
“Why all of the sudden? Why now?” I manage.
“I’m forty-three Higgy,” he says as if that clears everything right up. “I feel like I’m running out of time before I hit the big five-o.”
I turn and look at him dead in the eyes. “So…” I let out an incredulous chuckle, “let me get this straight: you think that moving to another state is going to solve all of that?” I try best to hide it, but I can feel my frustration beginning to seep through the conversation.
“Look-” he starts.
“You’re serious about this?” I ask, my head spinning and my heart practically thundering in my throat.
“Of course I’m serious about this.” He has the nerve to look annoyed sitting there.
I stand up, fed up. “You think that leaving everything you’ve built here is the key to finding happiness?” My voice is stronger, harsher, and I’m glad. “Have you even talked to Rick or T.C. about this?”
He stands up quickly, arms reaching out to, what, calm me down? “Whoa, whoa, whoa, Higgy. Slow down.”
I take a step away from him. “Have you told them?”
“No! No I have not told them yet!” he yells back, trying to, what, defend himself?
“Oh my God,” I breathe, look up at the ceiling, and then stare down at my feet. “You have known them for how many years? You are a part of their children’s lives, Thomas. Bloody hell, you’re their Godfather!” I may have screamed that last part.
He matched my pitch. “I have not told them yet because I know what they’ll say!” He lets out a long breath, trying to calm himself. “Look,” he says, desperately trying to keep his voice level, “this isn’t an easy decision.”
“Decision?” I laugh. “Thomas, you cannot be serious. There is no decision to be made. Your life is here, in Hawaii!”
He looks me dead in the eyes. “It has been, yes. For a while. But I need to move on.”
“Move on? FROM WHAT?” I yell, throwing my arms out in frustration.
“I just need to move on, okay?” he yells back, his anger levels matching mine again.
This cannot be a screaming match. Nothing is ever accomplished by that. “Thomas,” I start, trying to calm myself. “what in the bloody hell are you talking about? There is absolutely nothing here to run away from. Hannah is dead. You’re out of the Navy. So what Rick and T.C. have families? That’s life! Friends have families!”
“Yeah, well I want that,” he admits.
He has the nerve to say he wants that? “You want that? Thomas, YOU HAVE IT!”
“No,” he collects himself and rubs his eyes out of frustration, “I don’t.”
“YES YOU DO!” Then I start naming every single person in our lives by my fingers, “KUMU, RICK, T.C., JIN, GORDON, for crying out loud, ME!” Dammit, why am I crying.
Silence. He can barely look at me. Hell, I don’t want to look at him either, but at least I’m brave enough to do it.
“So that’s just it? You’re leaving it all behind? You said it yourself, Thomas: SIX. YEARS,” I clap after every word, “SIX. YEARS.”
“I know…” he covers his eyes with his hand, rubbing his temples fiercely.
“You’re just going to give all of that up?” I cannot believe this is happening.
“It’s not that…” he shakes his head.
“Then WHAT IS IT?” I do not understand him at all. “WHY DO YOU SUDDENLY FEEL SO INCLINED TO UP AND LEAVE?” I yell.
He turns to me, facing me with only a foot maximum between us. “I play cops and robbers every day,” he says, his eyes piercing mine. “I mooch off of a wealthy novelist and live with a woman I can’t stand anymore! So YES, I need to move on.”
For once in the six years we’ve known each other, I am speechless. I’m appalled by his words. He seems to be too.
He looks away from my fierce gaze, walks towards the other side of the room, distancing himself from me, and has the nerve to turn around. “I didn’t mean that,” he whispers sternly.
I let the tears fall freely now. My walls have been demolished by his wrecking ball of a comment. I cross my arms, look down at my feet, and try to compile myself. “If you ... hate me so much, why did you come over here in the first place?”
“I don’t,” he answers in lightning speed.
“Well, you just said you did. You know, I’ve really had it with your mind games.”
“Mind games?” he laughs, seeming honestly surprised by my words.
I step closer towards him, putting every fiber of my anger into my eyes. I stare him down, “You say you know me better than anyone. You say that I complete you. Was all of that just a big lie?”
“NO!” he yells, seemingly hurt that I would even think that.
We stare at each other for a few seconds in absolute silence.
“Anything else you want to get off your chest? Bet it feels good, huh?” I ask, wiping away the tears that have been streaming down my cheeks.
“Juliet, you said I should be honest with you. So, I’m being honest!”
Silence.
“Get out.” I can’t even look at him anymore.
He’s shocked. “Juliet…” he starts, desperately trying to reach out to me and stop all of this.
“GET. OUT!” I scream, back away from him, more tears streaming down my face. I have had it with this nonsense. Magnum looks at me, nothing but regret for his words in his eyes. I stare him down, my eyes shooting daggers. He turns to leave, practically dragging his feet.
But just as he is about to pass through the door, he confesses “I came here to tell you that I love you.” I turn quickly, surprised and frustrated at his sudden confession. What? “I’m sorry for what I said. Truly. I guess love makes you say stupid things,” he adds.
Just as he is about to open the door, I ask “Why tell me you love me if you have already decided you are leaving?”
He stops, but doesn’t bother to turn. “I hoped you’d say that you feel the same,” he pauses. “I’m leaving tomorrow,” and with that, he leaves and slams the door behind him.
Thunder suddenly echoes across the house: a tropical storm begins.
I let myself have a good cry, unable to believe what just happened. I need to regain my composure. This cannot be how it ends between us. I cannot lose him. I look around the room, my body shaking from our argument and his sudden news of leaving Hawaii.
He cannot leave. Please, God no. I cannot lose him too.
“Damn you, Thomas Magnum,” I curse and run to open the door only to be greeted by the rainstorm of the century. “Bloody hell!” Following my heart, I sprint to the guest house in the pouring rain. My entire body is soaked, but I just keep running. After a three minute sprint, I reach his door and without thinking, knock loudly and quickly.
I have absolutely no plan of what I am going to say. I just need him to stay.
Why isn’t he answering? I knock some more. Nothing. “THOMAS MAGNUM!” After a few repetitions of knocking, he finally comes to the door and opens it. “I’m done fighting,” he remarks, shaking his head. His eyes are red and puffy.
I nod, breathing heavily. “Good, because I didn’t come here to fight.” With that, I close the space between us and reach for the back of his neck, pulling him into a deep, passionate, and long-awaited kiss.
He was undoubtedly shocked at first, but, after a few seconds, when our kiss deepened, he wrapped his arms around my waist. Everything just fell into slow motion. Nothing in their lives had ever felt so right.
For six whole years we have desperately tried to ignore our feelings for each other, even tried to hide them from our own selves. All the back and forth, the arguments, they all had led up to this moment.
We break apart for a moment, catching our breaths. We look down towards our feet, our foreheads touching, and our minds trying to play catch up. “Juliet…” he starts, his voice warm.
“Stay,” I whisper and look up into his comforting brown eyes, inches away. I cup his face, another tear streaming down my cheek that he wipes away with his thumb. “Stay,” I repeat, putting every emotion I have left into my voice. “Please stay.”
He nods slowly, realizing how serious I am, and we kiss again.