Archive of Our Own

The ground was cold, or perhaps that was just the chills running through Venti’s body. The door to his house was closed, a physical barrier between him and Xiao. Venti wanted to follow Xiao out that door, to grab Xiao’s shirt and beg him to stay. He almost did. It took everything in him to let Xiao walk away. How long had Venti been on the ground? Daylight streamed through his window, a telltale sign that Xiao was long gone. What was Xiao doing now? Was he catching the early flight back to Liyue? Was he upset? Did he feel the same pain that Venti was feeling?

Everything hurt. It was hard to breathe when every breath felt like glass shards cutting his throat. The flow of tears had slowed but didn’t dry the damp floor around him. It felt like a bad dream… no… something even worse than a nightmare. A personal hell. Designed just for him. 

His mind was empty. There was nothing but pain. Venti hiccupped, trying to get more air into his lungs. He couldn’t stay on the floor much longer, and his knees were going numb. As he moved, he felt the ring’s heavy weight in his hand, an ugly reminder of how much Venti fucked up. Then, his knees gave out, and Venti crumbled to the ground, curling into himself as a fresh wave of tears flowed out from deep inside.

This was exactly what Venti wanted to avoid. It’s why he never wanted to fall in love. He was a fool for thinking things would go his way. He knew Xiao was working through his fears and maybe rushing into things wasn’t the best idea, but Venti was certain that they would work this out. He loved Xiao and Xiao loved him. Why couldn’t anything be simple?

Xiao was different from anyone Venti had ever met. Venti wasn’t planning on falling for him at first. He’d gone through countless lovers without feeling a single thing, but with Xiao, it was as if he lost the first time he saw Xiao. When those golden eyes landed on him for the first time, it was as if he was put under a spell. 

His brain spun that thought around and around until memories flashed across Venti’s mind. Venti could do nothing but be helplessly sucked back into the past.

Go back to the beginning where it all started. 

The party was loud, crowded, and had free alcohol. Venti only cared about the latter. He swiped a glass off a server’s platter and tried to find a quiet spot to drink. Lumine trailed behind him, busy looking at her phone.

“Who is more important than me?” Venti teased as Lumine let out a sigh.

“My brother. He should be here,” Lumine replied with an uninterested voice. She let out another sigh. “Dumbass isn’t looking at his phone.”

Venti pouted as she looked around the room. With Lumine distracted, Venti was having even less fun than he expected. It seemed like it was up to him to go out and find something -- or someone -- entertaining. “I won’t interfere with your sibling reunion. Have fun!” 

“Be on your best behaviour tonight,” Lumine instructed. “That means no hookups okay? I don’t want to cover up another scandal.”

“You’re no fun,” Venti pouted, waving his hand as he walked away. He downed his glass and set it on an empty table. He barely knew anyone at this event. It was filled with stuffy old businessmen. Venti was only invited because he was the pretty face attached to the project. 

He still couldn’t believe he agreed to the contract in the first place. The CEO of Rex Lapis Industries, Zhongli, had Venti in mind and would stop at nothing to get him to sign onto the project. Lumine tried luring him in by saying Rex Lapis Industries would pay well, but in the end, it was his curiosity that won him over. Venti had no idea why the man was so persistent on working with him in particular when he could have achieved the same result with any idol.

Speaking of Zhongli, he was sure to be around somewhere. Venti decided he should go and annoy the man. He was sure Zhongli would once again bring up Xiao, a Liyue actor. The idol was no stranger to Xiao’s reputable catalogue of work, and his performances never failed to entertain Venti. It also helped that he was extremely attractive.

Since Venti arrived in Liyue, Zhongli had mentioned the actor nonstop. Venti wondered if the man had a crush on Xiao or something. Zhongli even lent Venti all of his physical copies of Xiao’s works, which to Venti’s surprise, was every single media appearance, including commercials. Was Zhongli some sort of superfan?

As Venti wandered around the private club, he finally spotted the Zhongli speaking with a guest. From where Venti stood, he couldn’t see exactly who the guest was. Zhongli looked across the room and noticed Venti. He raised his hand and gestured for Venti to approach.

Nearing Zhongli, Venti’s heart pounded as he caught sight of the mysterious guest. Dressed in a leather jacket and pants that hugged him perfectly, Xiao looked like he stepped right out of a photoshoot. He looked even better in person! Venti made a mental note to try and not stare too much at the actor, but he could tell that was going to be a challenge. Taking a deep breath, Venti put on his biggest smile and bounced over. “Zhongli! Couldn’t get enough of me?” he greeted casually, trying not to let too much of his emotions show. Though, it was admittedly hard when the hottest person he’d ever seen was standing right there.  

“Venti, I would like to introduce you to my closest friend. Actually, let me rephrase that, I prefer to think of him as family at this point.” Zhongli motioned towards Xiao. “This is Xiao. He’s a very popular actor here in Liyue.”

No shit. The man wouldn’t shut up about Xiao. Venti would have to come down with a case of amnesia to forget Xiao’s name and face. But it was interesting that the pair knew each other so closely. Venti had been positive Zhongli was just a superfan, but it seemed like he was just supportive of his friend’s endeavours. Though the more he thought about it, Zhongli acted like a proud parent showing off his child’s achievements instead of a friend. Venti was only a bit curious how the pair knew each other. They weren’t exactly the same age nor had the same circle of friends.

Venti could have used that moment to expose Zhongli, but with the man staring at him sternly, Venti had the feeling he wasn’t supposed to mention Zhongli’s constant praise of the actor. “Oh! I’ve heard of Xiao! You recently starred in the Vigilant Yaksha! I absolutely loved it! You were amazing!” 

Beside Xiao stood a blonde man with long hair pulled into a braid. It didn’t take a genius to realize that he was Lumine’s brother. They really did look identical. Venti wondered how similar their personalities were. Lumine could be scary at times, while her brother looked like he picked flowers in his spare time. Perhaps Lumine’s brother could be Venti’s manager instead. He seemed a lot nicer than his sister and he hadn't even spoken a word to Venti. Lumine’s disapproving face appeared in Venti’s mind and he quickly decided that she was the best option for him.

The manager excused himself and left the group quickly, presumably to go find Lumine. What a small world.

Meanwhile, Xiao mumbled out a quiet thank you in reply, and Venti found his shyness adorable. For someone with his extremely hot looks,  his timid personality was quite cute.

Zhongli used that moment to excuse himself as well, leaving Venti alone with Xiao. Realizing that Xiao was more content with standing in silence, Venti tried to strike up a conversation. “I’m so glad you’re here! Everyone else is just boring office employees,” he exclaimed.

“What are you doing here?” Xiao asked. Red outlined his eyes, making them pop. His hair was pulled into a ponytail, revealing hints of silver gleaming on his ears. Venti had never felt such a pull towards another person before, but with Xiao’s reserved personality, Venti would have to put in some work to get to know the actor on a more personal level. Venti didn’t mind. He liked a challenge. It seemed like he had found his entertainment for the night. He wasn’t going to leave this event without knowing what Xiao’s lips felt like pressed against his. What fun!

“Me? I’m the face of this project! Why wouldn’t I be here?” Venti replied. He wondered how easy it would be to make Xiao blush. Venti bet it would take only a small compliment and the actor would be a mess.

“Congratulations,” Xiao said, refusing to meet Venti’s eyes.

Venti leaned close to Xiao, tilting his head curiously. He really was nice to look at. Artists probably fell to their knees at his beauty. Venti’s own knees wobbled slightly in the actor's presence. 

No, no no! He was getting off track! Back to his plan of making Xiao blush. “Eheh, thank you! You know, you’re pretty hot. I’ll admit I always had a bit of a celebrity crush on you!”

Xiao’s face turned crimson red. Ah! Just as Venti suspected. Xiao looked great with hints of red dusting his cheeks. “I am not worthy of your praise,” Xiao replied, embarrassed. He turned his head to the side, trying his best to hide his reddened cheeks.

He was adorable! Venti resisted the urge to kiss him right there. Instead, he reached out and grabbed Xiao’s hand, lifting it to press his lips against soft skin. “I don’t think I did anything that would deserve such high respect! We’re both in the entertainment industry and both highly successful! Please, think of me as an equal.”

Xiao ripped his hand from Venti’s grasp and covered his face. Venti could only grin as Xiao mumbled out an apology. Even the tips of his ears were red. Xiao was too much fun! This was exactly how Venti wanted to spend his evening. “You’re pretty when you’re flustered! I like it!” Venti complimented, watching as Xiao opened and closed his mouth in shock.

They ended up sharing a few drinks while they bantered lightly. Venti knew about the rumours that surrounded Xiao and how he was supposedly some type of bad boy. Venti had seen the video of Xiao beating someone up in a dark alley, but as they talked, Venti couldn’t believe the rumours about Xiao’s bad personality. There was no way someone so reserved could be such a bad person.

Venti knew how easily stories could get twisted with the media. He had his fair share of scandals himself -- after all, the media had turned him into a playboy. He was known for leaving a trail of broken hearts wherever he went, which was true to an extent. Venti did what he had to. He couldn’t stay away from people, but he also couldn’t afford to get close. So he had his fun and left before things got serious. Sometimes, the other party didn’t agree and wanted more, but Venti couldn’t make a commitment to them. It was for the best if he left.

“I don’t do idle chit chat. If people perceive that as a bad attitude, that's on them,” Xiao said, pulling Venti away from his thoughts. It seemed like the actor was ready to leave and Venti hadn’t had enough of him yet. He was fun to be around. Plus, Venti wanted that kiss.

Venti reached out, grabbing Xiao’s hand. “Well, if you won’t chat, let’s go dance!” he offered, pulling Xiao towards the dance floor.

“I don’t dance.” Xiao protested, trying to pull his hand from Venti’s grasp.

Venti decided to take Xiao away from the main dance floor and to the second-floor patio. The outside area was empty and Venti could see Xiao relaxing. He led them to the middle of the empty dance floor. Venti placed Xiao’s hands on his waist and wrapped his own around Xiao’s neck. He tugged gently, pulling Xiao towards him. Venti pressed their foreheads together, wanting nothing more than to close the distance between them. Even with them pressed against one another, Xiao still felt far away. “See, it's not so bad!” he said, feeling his heart pound in his chest. They swayed in place, barely moving. 

“I don’t think this qualifies as dancing,” Xiao breathed.

Venti laughed, trying his best to keep himself together. “Maybe not, but I like this better.”

As he looked into Xiao’s eyes, Venti lost himself in their dazzling gold flecks. It was as if he was being pulled in by the ocean’s tides, further and deeper until he was surrounded by golden elixir. Venti wanted nothing more than to dive under and see where it would take him. 

He reached out, placing one hand on Xiao’s cheek. It was softer than he expected. Lumine’s warning had long been forgotten. “Can I?” he asked. Please say yes.

Excitement coursed through Venti as Xiao nodded. Venti leaned in and pressed his lips against Xiao. Was it too cliché to say that he felt sparks? Maybe it was the alcohol. He pulled away, despite not wanting it to end.

It seemed like Xiao read his mind. He pulled Venti back into a heated kiss and Venti thought he would melt. He opened his mouth and Xiao deepened the kiss, darting his tongue inside Venti’s mouth. Venti moaned, moving his hands into Xiao’s hair and pulling at the elastic. He ran his fingers through the soft strands and pulled Xiao closer. Venti needed them flushed against one another. There was a fire burning inside him and only Xiao could put it out.

Venti broke the kiss, trying to catch his breath, and Xiao moved to trail kisses down his neck. Archons, Venti was going to remember this for the rest of his life. Xiao bit down on Venti’s neck, coaxing another moan from him. “I didn’t think you would be as shameless as me!” Venti tilted his head to give Xiao better access. He wasn’t expecting this from the guy who was still bashful when someone praised his work.

Venti didn’t mind though. This is exactly what he wanted. Xiao was skilled with his tongue and Venti wanted it to explore his whole body. He wanted more. But not in the way he usually did. Venti would be lying if he said he didn’t like Xiao. The actor was amusing to talk to. Venti was curious. He wanted to know Xiao better. Where did he grow up? Did he still talk to his parents? What was his favourite animal? Had he ever been in love before? Wait… stop it! 

Venti wavered. What was he doing? This wasn’t like him. He was losing control of himself. They just met and Venti was thinking crazy thoughts. He’d never done something so outlandish before. His chest swelled with panic at what it could mean. It’s because he’s super hot, he tried to reason. Still, his stomach flipped with excitement. Shit. 

He had to think of another reason, but it was hard. Every swipe of Xiao’s tongue on his skin sent pleasure coursing through Venti’s body. He was making even Venti lose his control. Venti, a veteran at never losing his cool. Sure he could have fun, but he was always the one leading the situation. The thought reminded Venti of what would happen if they were caught together. Xiao would be labelled as another one of Venti’s flings. He already had other troubles with the media, so getting caught up with Venti was probably the last thing he needed. Right, it would be reasonable to end this before they went too far.  

“This is just a slight error in judgment,” Xiao said, planting one more kiss on Venti's neck before raising his head to kiss Venti again. Venti’s thoughts disappeared as Xiao’s lips became the only thing he could think about. Man, Xiao was a good kisser.

They rested their heads together when they parted, and Venti’s mind cleared, reminding him what he had to do. He had to leave things there. Xiao shouldn’t be seen with him. Venti’s body protested, fire burning deep within him, but Venti knew there was no turning back if they kept going. “We should stop this here. I don’t want to ruin you,” he whispered.

Xiao paled. “As I said before, this is an error in judgment, that's all. I should go find my manager. He’s probably worried that I’m not where he left me. It was nice to meet you,” he said hurriedly.

Xiao stepped back, removing himself from their embrace. Before he could leave, Venti reached out and grabbed his hand. Don’t go. “Thank you.” There’s still so much I want to know. He gave a light squeeze and let go. This was for the best. Xiao didn’t deserve to get wrapped up with Venti’s messy life in any way. 

Venti waited a few moments on the balcony. He moved to lean against the railing, looking out at the Liyue skyline. He loved Mondstadt, his home, but there was something elegant about Liyue. The bright lights lit up the sky, dimming the stars. As a major trading port, Liyue had become a business center, with its fair share of skyscrapers that reached the clouds. Venti barely had any time to explore Liyue and all it had to offer. He wondered if he should hire a tour guide or maybe he could ask if Lumine’s brother would do it. 

When he decided to return down to the main floor, he found Lumine alone. Venti was only slightly displeased that Lumine’s brother wasn’t with her. He really thought a night time tour of Liyue was a good idea. When he told Lumine of his plan, she gave him a disapproving frown and told him to sober up. 

“Oh! Lumine! I met Xiao! You know that really hot actor?” Venti said excitedly.

“Did you now?” Lumine replied, a smirk crossing her face.

“Yeah! He looks even better in real life,” he swooned. “His eyes were the colour of Cor Lapis! And his hair was so soft. He was a good kisser too…” Venti could still feel the pressure of Xiao's lips against his. He brought his hand up to his mouth to check that he was imagining the touch. It felt so real. 

Dread spread across Lumine’s face. “Please tell me you didn’t hook up with him.”

“Ehe.”

“Venti! I told you no hookups!” Lumine rubbed her temples in frustration. 

“Relax, Lumine. We were on the balcony. There was no one out there but us. Besides, all we did was kiss. No harm in that right?” Venti shrugged.

Lumine gave him an unimpressed look. “Just for once. Could you do what I ask of you? It’d make my life easier.” 

Venti looked around and noticed that Xiao wasn’t present. Did he already leave? Disappointment hit him like a truck. He had been planning on staring at Xiao for the rest of the evening. Venti felt something stir in his chest and he pushed it down.

That was forbidden. Perhaps it was a good thing Xiao left after all.

Back in the present, Venti continued to cry. It was as if his eyes were broken faucets. Tears continued to leak out, no matter how hard he tried to stop the flow. He should have said no when Lumine proposed the idea of a fake relationship. Venti liked Xiao, so that’s why he had said yes. He liked him more than he wanted to admit.

Xiao was interesting. There was something about the actor that made Venti come crawling back whenever he tried to push him from his mind. On their first ‘date’, Xiao read Venti like a book. No mask that Venti tried to hide behind worked; Xiao saw through them all. The only other person who could do that was Caelus.

If Caelus was here, what would he tell Venti? He’d probably scold Venti for getting too ahead of himself. Venti missed him so badly. He was a complete mess. Mona had warned him yesterday that Xiao spooked easily, and Venti went and fucked it all up.

It was a slow realization, but before Xiao had come into Venti’s life, Venti was lonely. Venti had surrounded himself with people who loved him, yet that love never reached him. It was as if an empty void existed within him. He was hollow and empty, never feeling the warmth of emotions that he expected. Even if he did feel a tingle of warmth, he ran as fast as he could. But, once Xiao came he filled up the limitless space with his presence. And Venti felt alive. He finally felt those honey emotions that made people go crazy for love. 

Ever since he locked all his emotions away when Caleus died, trying to ignore the pain and grief, he had forgotten what it felt like. He forgot what it felt like to love someone and to be loved in return. But now that he felt that love with Xiao, he didn’t think he could ever go back. He enjoyed being in love. He didn’t want to run anymore, but he didn’t want to be in pain either. 

Venti clenched his hand, still holding onto the ring. He brought his fist up and slammed it on the ground. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. He was so god damn stupid. Xiao would never come back to him, and Venti couldn’t force him either.

He knew of Xiao’s past. At least what Xiao was willing to tell him. Venti had a feeling it was more than others knew, but still not the full story. If Xiao had stayed would he have fully opened up to Venti? The first time Xiao had trusted Venti enough to be honest about his past was a turning point in their fake relationship. Memories of their time on Pearl Galley tugged at his mind and the flashbacks were too vivid to ignore.

Venti was already feeling pretty good after their dinner with Zhongli and Childe. He seemed to have passed Zhongli’s test and earned the man’s approval. It made sense to Venti now, knowing that he was Xiao’s legal guardian. Venti giggled to himself, realizing that Zhongli’s constant push of Xiao and his work was actually an attempt to set Venti and Xiao up. In a weird way, it almost worked. 

Venti was also able to stick it to Childe. The man was infuriating about his relationship with Zhongli. Whenever his boss saw Venti at Rex Lapis Industries, he would boast about whatever fancy date Zhongli took him on. Venti would smile in the moment, patiently waiting until the day he could strike back. Childe’s face was priceless when Venti won their argument at dinner. He’d never let that man live it down. Xiao was better than Zhongli in every conceivable way. He was hot, a good kisser, and incredibly kind. Venti could continue the list if he wanted, but he’d be stuck in his head for the rest of the evening. 

Even though it was a fake relationship, Venti was having fun. He liked Xiao, he really did. Venti didn’t even have this much fun with his flings. He wondered how long he could extend their contract for. He didn’t want it to end. Xiao made him feel special and wanted, something Venti never felt with his previous lovers. Was this… the benefits of being in a relationship? Venti wasn’t sure.

Even though he was having fun, Xiao was still dangerous. Venti felt a flicker of heat beginning to form within him and he cursed himself for getting caught up in the act. That’s all it was. It was just because they were spending so much time together, more so than anyone else.  Venti’s contract would be ending soon and once he returned to Mondstadt, the sparks that had flickered between him and Xiao would disappear. At least that’s what he told himself.

Maybe Venti shouldn’t have teased Xiao so much. His time at Xiao’s apartment flashed before him. Xiao’s touch had burned as he rubbed gentle circles into Venti’s skin. The way he leaned in and whispered sweet nothings still rang in Venti’s ear even days later. Venti had to get a grip on himself. He was the master of flirting! And Xiao was able to reduce him to a blushing mess. It was slightly embarrassing how easy Xiao could throw Venti off kilter.

Then, they went to the Zhongli’s event at the Pearl Galley. As Venti stood in the Pearl Galley alone, waiting for Xiao to return with his drink, a stranger tapped on his shoulder. Venti turned. “Excuse me… are you Barbatos?” they asked sheepishly. Venti nodded and the person’s face lit up. “Mind if I get a photo with you?” Venti agreed and waited for the fan to take out their phone. They looked around and motioned towards a corridor. “The lighting is better over there. Is that okay?”

Venti hesitated, looking towards the bar, and saw Xiao waiting in line. If he was quick, Xiao wouldn’t even notice he was gone. “Sure!”

He followed the fan as they pushed the door open and walked down the corridor a little ways before stopping. “This should be okay!” The fan pulled their phone out and Venti prepared himself for a photo, smiling at the camera.

Suddenly, a loud bang came from the entryway, just as the photo was taken. Venti turned his head sharply towards the noise to see Xiao charging towards him. Something was wrong. Panic spread across his face as he got closer. His eyes were wild, and his shoulders were tense. “Xiao?” Venti asked cautiously.

“What are you doing?” Xiao cried, placing himself between Venti and the fan.

Venti was beyond confused. Something had clearly happened to throw Xiao, but Venti wasn’t sure what it was. He reached out, grabbing Xiao’s outstretched arm and lowering it gently. “We’re just taking a picture, are you okay? Did something happen?” he asked.

When Xiao refused to answer, Venti cupped Xiao’s face and forced him to look Venti in the eyes. “Xiao, look at me. What’s wrong?” he tried asking again.

Xiao’s eyes were filled with fear. Venti sucked in a breath. What happened? Seeing Xiao in such a state pulled at his heartstrings. Venti wanted to seal Xiao away, safe from whatever was hurting him.

“Alley…” Xiao whispered.

Oh. Oh. Venti kept his eyes glued on Xiao as he thought through a plan. He had to make Xiao feel safe. If this was related to the alleyway incident, it involved Mona who had been hurt, so maybe Xiao was worried about Venti’s safety? He was so focused he didn’t even realize the fan had left. Xiao wasn’t relaxing, so Venti slowly tucked a piece of hair behind his ear. He took a shot at his first guess. “Hey, I’m okay. Look at me! Nothing is out of place. You can touch me to be certain,” he said slowly.

Xiao took the offer, running his hands over Venti’s body to feel for himself that Venti was safe. Venti watched his shoulders relax slightly as his fingers delicately squeezed and poked Venti, checking for any injuries. Xiao’s eyes cleared and he slouched, realizing what was happening. “I-I didn’t mean to…” Xiao began but was cut off as the door opened once again.

Venti heard voices, but he didn’t register what they were saying. It wouldn’t be anything positive anyway. Those nosy gossips. They wouldn’t understand anything, but instead, they would run with whatever story sounded the worst. Venti had to get Xiao out of the hallway and into somewhere private. He grabbed Xiao’s hand and dragged him away from the door, heading towards the brothel section of the boat. At least there, the rooms were private. He tried the doors until one opened, and pulled Xiao into the room.

Xiao paused seeing the bed and Venti panicked. “Wait! No! These rooms are for that, but it’s just a quiet place away from the public!”

When Xiao relaxed again, Venti led him to the bed, where he fell onto the mattress. “Can you… sing for me?” Xiao asked.

Venti paused, not expecting Xiao to ask him for anything. But damn it! Venti would try his best. “Any requests?” he asked.

“Anything will do,” Xiao said and closed his eyes.

Venti picked one of his newer songs and sang through it. He watched Xiao, still as a rock, as he listened to Venti sing. As he finished the first song, Venti could tell Xiao still hadn’t calmed down. He decided to go with another song. Something a little more personal. It was one of his favourites. He had written it shortly after Caelus’s death, hoping it would help him cope. It did to some extent, but Venti had never felt comfortable sharing it with anyone.

For some reason though, he felt like Xiao would like it. He wanted to share it with Xiao. Venti wanted to open up more. He felt a genuine connection with Xiao, and at times, Venti was willing to offer all his secrets, just to learn one of Xiao’s.

As Venti finished, Xiao sat up and faced him. “That’s enough. Thank you.”

He looked better. Some colour had returned to his face and the fear was gone from his eyes. Venti pressed lightly. “Would talking about it help?”

“I don’t know… this has never happened before,” Xiao faltered.

Venti nodded, looking down at his hands. “I’ll listen if you need to talk.” Please trust me.

And to his surprise, Xiao did. He told Venti the truth behind the alleyway incident. It shocked Venti to learn someone had planned all that. That they wanted to hurt Xiao that much. The more he thought about it, the more Venti filled with anger. How dare someone do that? As Venti fumed, Xiao whispered, “Your music. It’s helped me in ways you can’t imagine. It frees me from the memories that try to tie me down.”

Venti froze, shocked at Xiao’s confession. Of course, he’s heard from countless fans that his music has helped them, and for that, he will always be grateful. But never had someone close to Venti ever admitted that. This was personal. This was Xiao. It was nice. 

Venti wanted to do more to help Xiao. Then he remembered the trick Mona had shared with him while he visited Xiao at work. Mona had told him that he should try it on Xiao, assuring a hundred percent success rate. Before Venti could talk himself down, he went for it. Butterflies swarmed in his stomach, but Venti opened the cage and let them soar. “You know, Mona did teach me something,” he said, grinning at Xiao.

Xiao raised his brows. “Did she?”

“Yup! She taught me how to read palms! Can I try?”

Xiao lifted his hand, and Venti grabbed it, tracing his finger along the lines of Xiao’s palm. Mona better be right. Venti’s brows furrowed together. “Hmm, weird,” he mused.

“What is it?”

“It says that we’re going to kiss.”

Xiao looked at Venti for a moment before he burst out laughing. Venti’s heart pounded as Xiao reached out and pulled him in for a kiss. Kissing Xiao had become a bad habit of Venti’s. He was becoming addicted to the way Xiao’s lips felt against his, and the way every touch sent sparks flying.

Venti shifted positions so he was sitting in Xiao’s lap. Staring down at Xiao, Venti couldn’t form any cohesive thoughts. How did he get so lucky? Fake boyfriend or not, Venti still got to kiss and spend time with someone so incredibly hot. 

But something was different about this kiss. It was more intimate and honest. It was raw. Venti craved it. He was hungry for more. Anything that Xiao was willing to give him, Venti would gladly take it. Venti had felt himself gravitating towards Xiao recently, with fireworks going off in his stomach whenever he was near the actor. He wanted to be by Xiao’s side and be that comforting presence in his life. Perhaps Venti’s feelings were stronger than he thought.

Xiao was everything Venti was running from. He created a sense of warmth and comfort that Venti tried to desperately ignore. Venti was dangling by a rope, underneath him was a pit of the unknown. What would he find if he fell in? Could he risk it all for Xiao? 

“You’re beautiful,” Xiao whispered, sending warmth coursing through Venti. Fuck it. He’ll cut the rope himself. He couldn’t pretend any longer. Fine! He had a crush on Xiao.

Xiao trailed his fingers up Venti’s spine, leaving shivers wherever he touched. Venti leaned down to place a gentle kiss on Xiao’s lips. “You’re dangerous,” Venti confessed. “You’re going to make me do bad things.” Venti was about to break all the rules he set in place. He was going to open his heart up for this man because, to him, Xiao was worth it.

Then, Zhongli, with his impeccable timing as always, barged into the room. That stupid old man! Venti left, knowing it wasn’t his place to sit in on their conversation. Zhongli cared about Xiao. Venti knew that, but it did irk him that Zhongli was already breaking his promise he made only a few hours earlier. I’ll stay out of your business. What a load of shit. It seemed like Zhongli took his role as an overprotective parent very seriously. Venti had thought that after dinner Zhongli would loosen his grip on Xiao and allow Venti to step in, but it seemed like the man had yet to figure out what that meant.

Venti headed back to the party, trying to get over the Zhongli situation. Several curious stares fell on him as he wandered through the crowds, making him want to run back to Xiao where they would be safe from prying eyes and ears. Xingqiu came up to him, looking worried. “Are you two okay?”

Venti nodded, feeling somewhat calmer in Xingqiu’s presence. “Yeah, we’re fine now. It was just a misunderstanding.”

Xingqiu’s frown deepened. “I’ve never seen Xiao so scared before. I’ve worked with him before and he kept everyone at arm's length throughout the entire production. For him to react like that, he must truly love you.”

Venti faltered. Xingqiu was lying. It was one thing for him to be falling for Xiao, but Xiao had already proved to him just how good of an actor he was. Venti was sure it was one sided. But then….what they did back in that room... Xiao had been vulnerable and that kiss was different. Maybe there was something after all.

The fan from before walked past Venti’s peripheral vision. “Excuse me for a moment,” Venti said to Xingqiu. He walked over to the fan and tapped their shoulder. Their face lit up when they caught sight of Venti. “Hi there! It was nice to meet you. I was wondering if you can do something for me? That photo we took together... could you please delete that?”

The fan’s smile fell as they took in Venti’s words. “I-uh- yes of course.”

Venti gave his best smile as he waited for the fan to pull out their phone, which they did slowly, fumbling along the way. He leaned over as they pressed the delete button. Venti didn’t move until they erased the photo from their phone's recently deleted folder as well. Once it was gone, he leaned back and flashed a cheeky grin. “Perfect! Thank you. Also, as a little favour for me, don’t tell anyone about tonight, okay?”

The fan nodded and Venti left, feeling slightly better. Hopefully, word didn’t get out. He saw Zhongli return alone and headed over. “Where’s Xiao?”

“He left,” Zhongli replied slowly. “And I owe you an apology for interrupting. I’m not used to Xiao having someone else who he trusts. I am glad he has finally found someone to confide in. It won’t happen again. I take my contracts seriously and this was a slip up on my part.” He looked at Venti with warm eyes and Venti suddenly realized that if he and Xiao got married, Zhongli would be his father-in-law.

Venti shook his head, eyes wide. He did not just think about marriage. He wasn’t even dating Xiao! Well… not properly. Did having a crush on someone involve thinking about marriage?

“It was my fault. I shouldn’t have gone off,” Venti said, trying to ignore the scenarios in his brain. Archons, Xiao would look handsome in a suit. A private ceremony with close friends and an open bar would be best. Wait… no… Venti was going off track. Since when did he become such a hopeless romantic?

“You handled it well. You’re exactly what he needs.” Zhongli continues. 

Venti flushed and tried to play it down. “It’s nothing,” he mumbled. He was starting to come to terms with the evening, feeling guilty about causing Xiao to panic like that. He hoped Xiao was okay. Venti should probably send a text to check up on him.

“Ah! I was wondering where you ran off to!” Childe slid up next to Zhongli and placed a kiss on his cheek. “I missed you!”

And Venti’s bad mood returned in an instant. Zhongli gazed at Childe fondly, bringing his hand up to cup his lover's face. “I was only gone for a short while, but I missed you too, my dear.” 

Venti wanted to gag. 

He pulled out his phone and opened his contacts. His fingers hovered over Xiao’s contact name, My Biggest Fan, and sighed. He put it in as a joke, hoping that Xiao would see it and get flustered. Now Venti was embarrassed by it. He clicked on the name and typed out a message: I heard you left! What a shame! Everyone here is so boring. Childe is showing Zhongli off and you’re not here for me to lower him down a peg. Looks like I’ll have to drink myself silly until I’m allowed to leave. I hope you’re feeling better!

Venti hoped it had enough lightness to it. He was worried, but he didn’t want to come across as overbearing. After all, they weren’t truly together. Could he even act like that?

His phone chimed with a new notification, and Venti checked it anxiously: Thank you for tonight. I’ve made things a lot harder than they should be in more ways than one. I’m sorry about everything.

Venti tightened his grip on his phone. Of course, Xiao would take the blame when it was partially Venti’s fault as well. And now with his mood significantly worse, he decided drinking the night away would be for the best.

He wished Xiao was still here.

Back then, Venti should have made a bigger mental note of Xiao’s triggers. He should have tried harder. Xiao’s pain had been etched across his face so clearly when he left, and it had all been Venti’s fault.

And now...Venti had to move. The floor was hurting his back and Lumine would murder him if he was stiff to dance for his comeback. But did it matter? He couldn’t work in the condition he was in. He had to do something to pull himself together. Moving slowly, Venti got on his knees and stood up. He swayed as he tried to stay upright and dragged himself to the kitchen. Still not able to let go of Xiao’s abandoned ring, he slipped it over his finger, on top of the one he still wore.

Venti ripped open his liquor cabinet and pulled out a bottle of the strongest alcohol he could find, knocking over multiple bottles in the process. It took him a few tries to pry off the lid, but it eventually came off with a clean pop! Pressing the glass bottle to his lips and tilting his head back, Venti drank as much as he could. He didn’t want to remember anymore. He wanted to forget. No. He wanted it back. He would do anything to rewind time and go back. His grip on the bottle tightened as he continued to chug. The alcohol burned his throat more than usual as it went down. 

When the bottle was half-empty, Venti wiped his hand across his mouth and headed to his music room, bringing the bottle with him. In the past, whenever he was overcome with feelings, he would sit and write a song. And now was no exception. 

As he entered, Venti ran his hand over his hanging instruments, their sounds ricocheting off the walls. Each string pulled was another painful reminder that Venti once put all his love and energy into writing songs about Xiao. It was his way of processing his feelings and trying to understand them better. The one he had shown Xiao was his favourite.  When he had first written it, he wasn’t certain that Xiao reciprocated, but he had hope.

His fingers paused over his guitar. “Am I going to be okay?” he whispered aloud, but all that answered was silence. Laughter bubbled from his chest. His sanity was slipping through the cracks. He was a fool for thinking his guitar would know anything about heartbreak.

Venti grabbed the guitar and collapsed to the ground. Crossing his legs, Venti took another swig of alcohol and positioned the guitar on his lap. He strummed aimlessly, trying out different chord progressions.

Each note was like a blade to the heart, piercing Venti with their sound. He grunted and swapped the guitar for his bottle. Perhaps he wasn’t in the right state of mind to come up with something. But that wasn't the truth. He could write a book full of the words Xiao whispered to him in bed, about the way Venti felt, the unspoken words left between them. If Venti looked closely, within the pages were lies and promises. Beautiful lies and broken promises. But perhaps that was all they were. A romance written in tears that ended tragically on the last page. 

Venti went for another swig of his drink and realized it was empty. In a flash of anger, he threw the bottle at the wall, watching it shatter into a thousand pieces. Just like his heart. Perhaps he was being too emotional, but he didn’t know what to do. Another waterfall of tears made their way down his face as the alcohol made the ache stronger. Venti wasn’t sure he was even going to survive with how badly it hurt.

He looked at the shattered glass. There was no way he could piece it back together. Is that what his relationship with Xiao was like now? Shattered and broken? Beyond repair? Could Venti fix things? Would Xiao realize he was wrong and come back?

Venti couldn’t go to him. He knew if he did, it would only push Xiao further away. And besides this was Xiao’s choice… could Venti even persuade him? He felt guilty even thinking about it. It wasn’t what Xiao needed. He needed to come back on his own without Venti’s interference. But would he? Could Venti hold out hope that maybe Xiao would change his mind? Was there anything he could do at all? Venti was desperate.

He fell back onto the ground, staring at the ceiling. Lifting his hand, he admired the rings as they glinted on his finger. The time he spent with Xiao in Mondstadt was unforgettable. Was there a way he could enter a time loop where he could live in those moments forever?

He still remembered it all too well. Every kiss, every laugh, every small moment that warmed his heart... 

“Your moves are sloppy,” Eula, his choreographer, commented. “Your comeback is soon, isn’t it? You need to work harder.” She crossed her arms and gave Venti a disappointed look.

Venti rubbed his head sheepishly. “Sorry, Eula. My boyfriend is coming today and I guess I’m distracted.”

It had been too long since he’d last seen Xiao. Venti missed him terribly. But Xiao was set to arrive in Mondstadt that day and Venti couldn’t be any more excited.

Venti had come to terms with his feelings. He was undeniably in love with Xiao. He just didn’t know what to do with the information. For once his mind wasn’t telling him to run, but to stay. He didn’t want to push Xiao away like he had with the others in the past. 

Venti had come to terms with his emotional unavailability a long time ago. He knew he would always leave as soon as he started to feel something. He was certain there wasn’t someone out there for him that would change his mind, but then, in walked Xiao. His presence in Venti’s life shined so brightly, it dulled the stars. Venti was shocked at what he had been missing all his life. He didn’t want to run anymore. Venti was going to cement his feet in place and take it at full force. He was going to risk everything that he had so carefully built up since Caelus died and pray that it would turn out okay.

Eula turned her head and ignored Venti. “Boyfriends come last when you have a comeback on the horizon. From the top.”

“I don’t think Venti knows how to stop talking about his boyfriend,” Fischl snickered from where she sat in front of the mirror.

Venti gave her a dirty look and got into his opening position. “Sorry that you can’t stand to see other people happy,” he shot back at her.

“Well, she’s not wrong, Venti,” Barbara replied. “You do talk about Xiao a lot.”

Venti pouted. How dare she take Fischl’s side! “Barbara! You’re supposed to agree with me! If you two don’t like my Xiao talk, then why are you even here?”

“We’re on break and we wanted to see your new choreography.” Fischl shrugged.

“You both will be asked to leave if you don’t close your mouths,” Eula snapped.

Fischl rolled her eyes while Barbara mumbled an apology. Once they were quiet, Eula pressed play on the sound system and music blasted through the speakers. Venti’s new single played as he went through the choreography. Eula already promised he could leave when Xiao arrived, but if Venti’s dance was sloppy, she might change her mind. Venti couldn’t risk that. His body was filled with energy just knowing that Xiao would be arriving soon. Xiao. His fake boyfriend that he wished every night would one day become his real boyfriend.

He put extra emphasis on each pose he hit and did his best to keep his movements smooth and clean. Venti thought of Xiao, wondering if he would like his comeback. It was because of him that Venti was able to return so quickly.

Venti’s entire album was a love letter to Xiao. No matter what, his feelings were now immortalized in song. He opened his heart for once, and everything just poured out. Xiao was an emotion Venti had never felt before. Xiao was his muse, his moon, his light. It made him giddy. He wanted Xiao to love it. His was the only opinion that mattered to Venti.

As Venti finished his routine, the sound of clapping pulled his attention towards the door. He whipped his head towards the noise and saw Xiao standing in the doorway. Venti’s heart pounded in his chest. Was it because they haven’t seen each other for a while? Xiao looked just as beautiful as he did the first time Venti laid eyes on him. Simply looking at him, Venti fell in love all over again.

Venti’s mind went blank as he took off and ran towards Xiao. He jumped, trusting that Xiao would catch him. “Xiao! Welcome to Mondstadt!” Venti cried. He hugged Xiao tightly, not wanting to let him go. He never wanted to leave Xiao’s embrace.

“I’m glad to be here,” Xiao said, adjusting his grip to hold Venti in his arms.

Venti brushed Xiao’s cheek. “I missed you.” I love you.

To Venti, everything he did was real. The way his fingers moved down Xiao’s face was real. The way he flushed when Xiao nuzzled against his touch was real. When Venti closed the distance between them and kissed Xiao, it was real. It was all real, and it didn’t scare Venti. Not anymore. If it was with Xiao, he could do anything.  

“I missed you too,” Xiao replied when they broke the kiss.

Venti pressed their foreheads together and laughed. “I’m so happy you’re here!” He couldn’t wait to see what Mondstadt would bring them.

And Mondstadt brought it all! Venti experienced one of Xiao’s nightmares on their first night. It was terrifying to see Xiao suffer. All Venti could do was be a comforting presence at that moment, and hope it was enough for Xiao. He ended up sleeping in the same bed as Xiao, and he had to calm his racing heart, telling himself it was only to watch over Xiao. In the morning, he woke to an empty bed, but his position was enough to let him know he had moved towards Xiao in the middle of the night. Venti had grinned to himself, wondering how flustered Xiao must have been when he realized they were cuddling.

As Venti spent more time with Xiao, it truly felt like they were together. Venti could tell Xiao thought the same. Venti was set on confessing. He was just waiting for his reading from Mona, and then he would do it. He wasn’t a superstitious person, but he needed all the luck he could get.

There were highs, and there were lows. Xiao had another panic attack. Venti watched as Xiao closed himself off from Venti and tried to deal with the pain by himself. It frustrated Venti. He wanted to be there for Xiao in any way he could. He watched as Xiao buried his pain during their joint interview. He saw the fake smile he plastered on his face and expected Venti to believe.

Then Venti confessed his feelings during a meteor shower. It was the most romantic and cliche move he’d ever made, but he didn’t care. He had never confessed to someone before. It was as terrifying as it was exhilarating. And Xiao reciprocated and agreed to date Venti! It was everything that Venti had dreamed of. Everything was perfect.

It was so perfect, in fact, that Venti started to think with his heart instead of his brain. As the couple strolled through the mall, a jewelry store caught Venti’s eye. He stopped, not just because his extremely hot boyfriend was in the promotional photo in the shop window, but also because of the two gold rings on display. An idea popped into Venti’s head and he smiled to himself.

He found a way to escape from Xiao when they entered the farmer’s market. Xiao was the cook and knew the ingredients that they needed for dinner, so Venti invented an excuse about going to the bathroom and ran off. Diluc trailed behind him quietly and raised a brow when Venti passed the bathrooms. “Thought you had to go?”

“Nope! That was just an excuse! There’s somewhere else I want to go, but Xiao can’t know,” Venti explained as they stopped in front of the jewelry shop.

“Welcome!” A lady behind the counter smiled brightly as Venti and Diluc entered. She gasped when she recognized him. “Oh my! Barbatos! Is there anything I can help you with?”

“Yes!” Venti pointed at the window display. “I want to buy those rings please.”

The assistant nodded and went to see the model of the rings. “Is one for you? Can I see your hand so I can size it?”

Venti let the lady size his finger and write down a number on a piece of paper. “Do you know the size of the other ring?”

Venti thought for a moment. “His finger should be about the same size as mine. If it doesn’t fit, we can come back and get it resized.”

“Okay. Give me a second to grab them from the back.” 

“Really?” Diluc asked incredulously as the employee left. “Rings? Are you already asking him to marry you?”

Venti’s face heated at Diluc’s comment. “No!” he shrieked. Venti coughed awkwardly to cover up his outburst. “No. More like a promise ring. To show him how much I appreciate him.”

Diluc shrugged. “You’re a total sap when you’re in love aren’t you? I don’t know which version of you I prefer. With Xiao you seem to get yourself into less trouble, so that’s nice, but you're more annoying. Did you know you don't have to talk about him every chance you get? Sometimes you can keep things to yourself.”

“Diluc!” Venti knew he was acting like a teenager in love, but this was his first time. He loved Xiao so much, and he wanted to tell his boyfriend every single way that he could.

The lady returned, saving Venti from any more embarrassment. She placed a black velvet stand on the counter and set the rings on it. Venti picked one up and inspected it. They were plain bands, but he thought they were perfect. He slipped it over his finger easily and admired the way it shined on his finger.

Venti smiled as he pulled the ring off. “It’s exactly what I wanted! I’ll take them!”

The lady returned his smile as she grabbed the rings and started to pack them up. “May I ask why you are shopping today?”

“I want to show my boyfriend my appreciation for him. I love him very much.” Venti still felt giddy calling Xiao his boyfriend because now there was nothing fake behind it. He was really his boyfriend!

“That’s sweet. I’m sure he’ll love it.” The lady rang Venti up quickly.

Venti pulled out his phone to check the time. His heart stopped when it had already been 15 minutes since he told Xiao he would be going to the bathroom. “Just say a fan stopped you,” Diluc offered, seeing the panicked look on Venti’s face.

“Oh!” Venti gasped. “You’re a genius!”

“I’ll hold onto the rings until you decide to leave since we both know you’d probably lose them.” Diluc grabbed the bag.

Venti laughed as they exited the store, the shop assistant bowing in gratitude behind them. Everything was perfect.

Except it wasn’t. Venti just didn’t realize it yet. He should have paid closer attention to Xiao and realized he was struggling, but Venti’s mind was clouded by love. It was what caused their downfall.

Silence greeted Lumine as she entered Venti’s house. She slipped her shoes off quietly and walked in. Immediately, her foot landed on damp flooring. She looked down in worry, inspecting the floor.

Oh, thank the archons, it was just water.

Aether and Xiao had already left Mondstadt. When Aether rushed out of her apartment earlier that morning, he’d apologized profusely for Xiao. Lumine waved him off, telling him to focus on Xiao’s health. She hoped he was okay.

Lumine didn’t know the full story, but Aether told her bits and pieces, and it seemed to her that the relationship ended up being too much for Xiao. She should have planned better, given Xiao more space and time to breathe. But she hadn’t planned for Xiao and Venti to fall for each other.

She’d never seen Venti so happy before. Whenever Xiao was mentioned, Venti’s eyes would light up and a smile would break out across his face. It amazed Lumine. She was slightly worried that Venti would try to back out of the contract early, but instead, he had gone to her and begged to have the contract extended.

Lumine continued further into the house. There were no signs of life in the living room. Her next stop was the kitchen. The liquor cabinet door hung open, with bottles tipped over and rolling on the floor. Lumine sighed, making a mental note to clean it up later. She climbed the stairs slowly, the steps creaking under her movements. Venti’s room was empty. The bed was unmade but didn’t look slept in. “Venti?” she called out. She checked the bathroom. Empty.

Where had he gone?

The music room was the last place she checked. Lumine wished she prepared herself better. The room itself wasn’t in too bad of condition. Only one guitar was taken off the wall and seemed to be unharmed. A glass bottle was shattered in the corner, and Lumine made another mental note to clean that up later too.

Venti was sprawled on the floor. His shirt was wrinkled and rode up his body, revealing his underwear. A sparkle of light caught Lumine’s eyes and she spotted two gold rings on Venti’s fingers. Her stomach dropped as she watched him run his finger over the golden bands.

“Venti?” she called out gently.

Venti slowly rose at her voice, his hair knotted and messy. He rubbed his bloodshot eyes, trying to wipe away his tears. Lumine got down on her knees and reached out, taking Venti’s face in her hands. “Venti?” she asked again. She searched his face and only saw pain.

“L-Lumine…” Venti’s voice shook. It was raw and it pained Lumine to hear him like that. “Am I going to be okay?” Tears flowed from his eyes as his body shook.

Lumine bit her lip, trying her best to figure out how to deal with the situation. She’d never seen Venti so broken before. He’d always been so put together, never letting his true emotions show. But here Venti was, for once open and vulnerable, and it was an awful sight to see.

Venti stared at her, waiting for her response, and Lumine gave up. She wrapped her arms around Venti’s trembling body and pulled him close. “I don’t know,” she whispered into his hair. Venti sobbed into her shoulder as Lumine rubbed gentle circles into his back.

She really didn’t know.