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Hitoshi and Denki had never been a couple that often fought, but on the occasions when they did fight, it was usually over something important to the both of them.
It's no secret that the two of them both had incredibly powerful quirks, with Denki's electrification and Hitoshi's mind control abilities. However, that level of intense power also brings some pretty detrimental drawbacks, especially for Hitoshi. Chronic migraines and night terrors were the most prevalent side effects of his quirk, only worsened by the addition of Hitoshi's already existing insomnia. No remedies that he tried worked whether medication, therapy, or even down to outlandish old-wives-tale treatments. However, that's not where the problem arose.
Hitoshi's different ways of dealing with these side effects were what really caused a bit of turbulence in their normally smooth-sailing relationship.
The similarities between Hitoshi and his father, Shota Aizawa, were so uncanny that you could hardly believe that Hitoshi was adopted. Hitoshi only differs from his father's behaviors in some subtle ways: one of them being their attitudes towards sleep. Shota loved to sleep, while Hitoshi's insomnia usually prevented him from sleeping altogether. He had an idea to use this to his advantage and as a way to remedy his quirk's drawbacks, and Hitoshi decided he would start forgoing sleeping entirely.
In his mind, it made sense: he could deal with the migraines, but the night terrors can't get him if he doesn't sleep, right? He wished he would have to result to such a trivial way of dealing with these symptoms, but he was running out of options. In his mind, he had no other choices left, and this was the only thing that really did work in some regard.
Hitoshi would go numerous days without sleeping, only opting to rest when it was the most convenient, which in itself was rare. Denki tried not to pay it any mind since he never wanted to interfere with Hitoshi's methods. He trusted that what Hitoshi was doing was for the best, but that became much harder to do after seeing how much Hitoshi's lack of sleep was hurting him without realizing it.
The pair had thought that Hitoshi's quirk drawbacks would get better and more manageable after graduation and starting their lives as pro heroes, but that wasn't the case. In fact, they got worse.
Hitoshi was becoming much more irritable and short-tempered, much more than what Denki was used to dealing with when he was in school with the likes of Katsuki Bakugou. Denki also noticed that Hitoshi was getting sick more often, as if his immune system could barely keep up with the man's practically non-existent sleep schedule. Denki kept trying to ignore these things, hoping they'd iron themselves out in time, but Denki knew deep down that these "methods" that Hitoshi had been trusting were becoming WAY more self-destructive than beneficial, no matter how much they temporarily warded off his quirk drawbacks.
Hitoshi had been sleeping on and off for about a week straight now, only sleeping for less than three hours at a time, and the two of them were to be sent on a mission soon. However, despite this fact, Hitoshi still refused to sleep through the night. Denki tried to insist that he slept so that Hitoshi could be at his best for the mission, but even still, Hitoshi didn't budge. Denki decided that enough was enough, and he was putting his foot down. Tonight, he was going to confront Hitoshi about these things that have been worrying him. After all, things don't get solved if there's no communication, right?
It was a rare evening when the two of them were home at the same time of night. With Hitoshi being more of an underground pro hero than Denki was, their schedules didn't often coincide since Hitoshi worked at night and Denki worked during the daytime. The two had some days off from patrol to rest up and prepare for the upcoming mission, so Denki knew that tonight was the night.
Denki was sitting on the shared bed in their apartment, while Hitoshi stood in the middle of the room on his way out to the main living area. He planned to put on a pot of coffee and do some mission research all night and not sleep.
Again.
For the fourth night in a row.
"Hitoshi, I'm serious," Denki stated flatly. "You can't keep pulling all-nighters like this."
"Why not?" Hitoshi asked, a bit sarcastically. "I'm not hurting anybody, plus if anything, I'm helping myself."
"That's the problem, 'Toshi. You're not." Denki shot back. "It's really not healthy to sleep as little as you do."
Hitoshi scoffed again. "You really love to worry about me, don't you?"
"Well, no, I don't like to." Denki retorted. "But I do."
Nothing annoyed Hitoshi more than nagging. He didn't enjoy being doted on and supervised, and he hated feeling like he was a supervised child who couldn't make his own decisions. He knew what Denki was trying to do and he appreciated that he cared about him, but he just wished he would just let this go. He knew what he was doing and there was no need for Denki to interfere.
"Denki, it's really not that big of a deal." Hitoshi shrugged. "Who cares about a pro hero's sleep schedule? I mean, come on. There are other things that I need to worry about. Now goodnight-"
"Wait- M- ME! I- I do! I care… well, you know, because it's you..." Denki squeaked, his tone becoming more frantic. He rose from his spot on the bed and started towards Hitoshi, stopping in front of him in the bedroom doorway. Denki lifted his arms and spread his legs in a starfish formation across the door, making sure to cover the entire door so that Hitoshi had no way out. "Hitoshi Shinsou, I care about you."
"I know you do," Hitoshi replied. "And if you really do, you'll let me do this."
Denki sighed and dropped the formation, letting his arms fall to his sides. He pinched the bridge of his nose with his pointer finger and his thumb. "Come on, don't do that… Don't go there."
"Denki." Hitoshi prodded. "You know I have to do this."
"No, you have to SLEEP," Denki stated his voice stern.
"No." Hitoshi shot back, his voice matching Denki's intensity. "I told you, this helps me. So, just… for this once, stop worrying about me. I'm alright. Goodnight, Denki."
He could feel himself getting more and more heated, but he fought to maintain his composure. "Seriously? We're really going to fight about this?" Denki whined.
"You're the one not letting this go!" Hitoshi barked.
"Because I'm not going to!" Denki responded. "I don't know how much more I'm going to have to remind you that you need to sleep, Hitoshi! I mean, it's a basic human function, for god's sake!"
The lavender-haired man groaned and diverted his head away from the blonde. He didn't respond.
"Hitoshi, listen to me." Denki directed. "There's a lot of things I will let you get away with, and this one was for a while, but this has gone on for far too long."
"Don't lecture me- who are you, my mother?" Hitoshi sneered.
"You're being so childish about this…." Denki sighed.
"I'm the one being childish?! I wouldn't be if you would just drop this, Denki." Hitoshi hissed. "The thing is- there's nothing more than anyone can do at this point, so why should I even bother trying to fix the problem when even the proven cures don't fuckin' work?"
"Hitoshi, you make it sound like it's the end of the world..." Denki exclaimed. "You know I'm here for you! I know, nightmares and all that stuff really sucks, I understand, but I'm here to help you! You don't have to go through it alone-"
Hitoshi rolled his eyes and shook his head, his front teeth chewing on the inside of his bottom lip. "You have no fucking idea how bad it is, Kaminari." He scowled. "You have no fucking clue what goes in my head. You'd never understand. What makes you think you can help me?"
Denki fell silent. He didn't know how to respond to that. Hitoshi lashing out like this is absolutely unheard of, and Denki barely knew how to handle it.
"Exactly." Hitoshi sighed after a moment of pure silence. "This is what's important to me right now, so please, for the love of God, let me do this." With that, Hitoshi tried to push past Denki to get out of the bedroom. "Goodnight, Denki."
"Tosh- Baby, please…." Denki responded meekly, moving in front of Hitoshi to stop him from leaving.
“No, I said drop it, Denki.” Hitoshi pleaded, trying to dodge the blonde. "We can deal with this in the morning."
"No!" Denki exclaimed, following his moves to make sure that he didn't give Hitoshi any opening to leave the room. "I told you, I can't do that!"
Hitoshi stopped and stepped back exasperatedly, letting out a dark chuckle. "God- you care SO MUCH, don't you?" He yelled.
Denki could tell Hitoshi was exasperated and desperate to end this conversation, but Denki had pressed too far to stand down now. "Hitoshi, please- I don't understand why you're getting so upset about this!" Denki shot back.
"Fine then!" Hitoshi cried, swinging his arms down to hit his sides in exasperation. "Tell me then- tell me, why do you think it's so harmful to me to act like this?"
"Okay, well first of all, chill out. And second-," Denki began, but his voice suddenly stopped dead mid-sentence.
Denki froze in his place, completely still. His once golden eyes were glowing a bright shade of purple. His gaze was empty and unfeeling. Hitoshi still stood in front of him, his own eyes glowing a similar shade of purple.
It seemed like a good idea at the time… to brainwash him to get him to stop talking so that they could just put off this argument until the following day. Hitoshi never liked arguing with Denki and he was already too angry to say anything else that he wouldn't regret, so he much preferred putting the discussion on hold until the morning. However, the idea was quick to sour. A painful memory struck Hitoshi at that moment, one that made him contemplate everything.
"Do your dads ever argue?" Denki asked.
The two of them were hanging out in Hitoshi's room after school one day, laying in Hitoshi's bed and pretending they were studying, but in reality, they were just talking the night away like they usually did. It had become a staple pastime for the two of them, considering there wasn't much else they wanted to do with each other.
"I… don't really know," Hitoshi replied. "But if they do, they don't do it in front of me and Eri, which is nice, I guess."
"Yeah…" Denki sighed. "But if they did argue, hypothetically… would Mr. Aizawa use his quirk?"
"Huh?" Hitoshi responded, confused. "Why are you asking me this?"
"I don't know…." Denki admitted with a laugh. "I was just curious since his quirk would probably be pretty effective to use in an argument, especially against Mic. Like, he could just erase Mic's quirk and keep him from talking! That's one way to defuse an argument."
Denki rolled over onto his side to look at Hitoshi but suddenly realized he didn't share the same blissful curiosity about the situation: he wasn't laughing or even smiling.
"He would never do that," Hitoshi stated. "He told me himself, that's something he'll never do."
"Oh," Denki replied, backing off a bit. "Why's that?"
"Because he told me he would rather solve arguments in a way that's civil and fair instead of a way that's easy." Hitoshi continued. "Using his quirk would be taking advantage of the other person in a way that isn't fair to them or him."
"That makes sense," Denki responded with a shrug, rolling onto his back again.
"He told me that promised Mic that he would never use his quirk in an argument, and he's kept that promise ever since they got married," Hitoshi stated.
Denki giggled. "That's really sweet, actually."
"Yeah." Hitoshi chuckled. "It makes me think that… I should follow that example too, you know?"
The blonde sat up and cocked an eyebrow at Hitoshi, propping himself up onto his elbows. "What do you mean?"
Hitoshi pulled himself up on the bed, sitting up straight, and turned his head to look at Denki. "I mean to you. My quirk is even more effective than his is in defusing an argument, and… I would hate to take advantage of you like that."
Hitoshi took Denki's hands into his, pulling the golden-haired boy to sit fully upright on the bed and turning his entire body to face him. The pair had only really been officially in a relationship for a little less than half a year at this point, but the two were pretty serious about things, especially Hitoshi.
"I promise you, right here, right now, I will never use my quirk on you in an argument. It doesn't matter what it's about or how heated it gets. We will do things civilly and like adults." Hitoshi stated, his gaze unwavering and focused intently on Denki's eyes. If Denki didn't think he was serious about this promise, he sure as hell did now.
Denki laughed a little bit at his sudden seriousness. "You make it sound like I'm signing a contract or something. I know you wouldn't do that. Did you think I'd be worried about that?"
Hitoshi dropped Denki's hands and shrugged his shoulders. "Well, no, I just… I guess I just don't want to be the bad guy. Not to you, not now, not ever."
Denki brought his hands up to Hitoshi's face, lightly cupping his cheeks. "Toshi, it doesn't matter if you're the good guy or the bad guy, 'cause you're always going to be my guy, and that's all that matters to me." Denki then smiled gleefully and leaned forward, planting a soft kiss onto Hitoshi's nose with an exaggerated mwah sound.
Hitoshi laughed, breaking his serious demeanor. "Thanks, Denks… really." He chuckled. "This just… it all means a lot to me, you know?"
Denki nodded. "I know. And I love you for it."
Hitoshi wrapped his arms around the blonde's waist without warning while Denki's arms rested around his neck. He pulled the other boy into his lap with a gentle tug, Denki letting out a shocked gasp as his body was quickly brought flush with Hitoshi's, though he wasn't about to protest. The two laughed together for a long while, idling and rocking back and forth on the bed before letting their foreheads fall and press against the other.
Hitoshi thanked any higher power in the universe every single day that he had someone like Denki in his life, one that convinced him that he was more than his quirk, more than what people thought of him, more than what people assumed of him because of his quirk. For the first time in his entire life, it was as if he felt like his own person and not just a physical embodiment of his power. It made him so happy to know that Denki would be with him for the long haul and would always stick by his side, no matter what.
What the hell am I doing? Hitoshi screamed at himself inside his own head. What the hell am I doing??
He was doing precisely the thing he promised Denki he would never do.
Oh my god.
Hitoshi quickly deactivated his quirk, disgusted with himself and ashamed of his actions. He could feel his heart racing and his body beginning to panic. What was Denki going to say to him? He had just broken one of the most important promises he'd made to him, and now he was just left standing in the middle of their bedroom like an idiot.
Hitoshi watched as Denki's eyes slowly faded back to the shimmery gold he was so used to seeing, but in his own disgust with himself, he couldn't stand to look at him anymore. He quickly raced into the bathroom and slammed the door behind him before Denki even had a chance to register that he was even there.
Hitoshi panted, gasping for air as he gripped the edge of the bathroom sink, desperate for any way to slow down his heart rate or stop his body from panicking. He stared deeply into his own sunken eyes through the bathroom mirror, allowing himself a moment of contemplation.
They were right, Hitoshi echoed in his brain. My god, they were right.
Hitoshi wanted to scream, he wanted to punch something, do anything to rid himself of this frustration, but he just couldn't find the strength to. He had broken a promise he made to the person he loves most in the world, and even worse, it could have been prevented. If he had just thought about it a little further...
"Fuckin'… dense… stubborn… piece of SHIT…." Hitoshi grunted through gritted teeth, punctuating his frustration in every word by hitting himself in the head with the heel of his hand. He felt so stupid. He felt foolish. He felt… gross. Hitoshi was trapped in a moment of such painful clarity that he didn't know what to do. He realized that night, something he had always known in the back of his mind, but it wasn't clear until now.
It's so easy to become the bad guy and not even realize it.
Hitoshi could feel tears stinging the corners of his eyes, and his knuckles paled against the bathroom sink. He couldn't stop his body from shaking, and he could hardly bear to look at himself in the mirror anymore. He felt disgusting and terrible, and one word continued to race through his brain.
Monster.
Hitoshi let go of the sink counter, letting his trembling hands rake through his thick purple hair. He screwed his eyes shut and let out a shaky sigh as the wretched word kept repeating over and over in his head, louder and louder every time. He wished his brain would be quiet for just this once, but he knew that was an unreasonable request at this point. It was all just too much. Hitoshi stumbled to the toilet and sat down on the closed lid, lowering his head into his hands.
He hoped that by the time he recovered from this, Denki would have had the common sense to pack his things and leave him for someone more deserving of a wonderful guy like Denki Kaminari already.
~*~
Suddenly, Denki came to, standing in the middle of his and Hitoshi's shared bedroom. He was unsure of how he had gotten there: his head felt fuzzy, but he didn't feel too disoriented. It was as if he blacked out for a moment, but he couldn't explain why. He remembered having a conversation with Hitoshi, and then his vision blurred, and now Hitoshi was nowhere to be seen.
Then it all came back in an instant. Denki and Hitoshi didn't just have a simple conversation; they argued. What's more, Denki remembered that fuzzy feeling in his head all too clearly; it was a familiar feeling from when the two of them sparred during their training with him at UA.
Hitoshi must have used his quirk on him.
Denki suddenly heard a door slam in the room, and his head snapped to the noise. It was the door of the bathroom in their bedroom.
Denki didn't say anything, he just felt his shoulders slump, and his body relax. It was all even more evident now. He knew for a fact that it was Hitoshi who was in there and that something was very wrong.
Denki hesitantly and slowly made his way to the bathroom door. He didn't knock right away, opting instead to press his ear gently to the door and survey what was going on inside. When he heard no response or clamor from the inside, he pulled his head away from the door, and his hand fumbled for the doorknob, giving it a gentle turn so as to not startle Hitoshi. Denki peeked through the door into the bathroom, now able to survey the pitiful scene with his eyes.
Denki's heart immediately sank into his stomach. All he saw was Hitoshi Shinsou, his boyfriend, the love of his life, sitting on the toilet seat lid with his head in his hands, shaking and panting heavily. Denki did remember the promise that Hitoshi had made to him all those years ago when they hung out that day after school about never using his quirk on him during an argument, but it never even crossed his mind that Hitoshi would think of doing that to him, so he never worried about it. Maybe he would have been actually angry with Hitoshi if he had followed through entirely with the action and left him brainwashed in their bedroom, but he didn't. He didn't do anything like that. He wouldn't do anything like that.
Mistakes were made that night, but not ones that couldn't be forgiven.
Seeing his boyfriend this distraught, with the context of why he was so upset, made Denki's heart ache, twisting the metaphorical dagger deeper into his chest. Hitoshi wasn't one to get this emotional about things like this, and when he did, Denki knew it was something serious. He wasn't sure what Hitoshi wanted or needed at that moment, but he was determined to help him through this. There was no way in hell that he was letting this night ruin their relationship.
Hitoshi didn't see or hear him come in and only realized Denki was there when he felt a new presence kneel in front of him and place its hands over his thighs. Its… or rather, HIS touch was alarmingly gentle and comforting.
"Baby…" Denki whispered.
Hitoshi slightly lifted his head from his hands to look at Denki. His soft voice alone was enough to make the heavy guilt seep back into Hitoshi's stomach. He still felt terrible about everything.
Hitoshi let his arms fall from his head and idle in-between his legs, with his elbows still resting on his knees. All he did was look at Denki for a moment, his eyes full of regret and sadness, then he diverted his gaze. He was too upset with himself to face Denki, and he wanted to say so much, but the words just sat in his throat and didn't move. He couldn't bring himself to speak since that was exactly how he hurt him the first time. What could he say now to fix what's already been broken?
Denki began to slowly rub circles into Hitoshi's thigh with his thumb, desperate for him to say something, anything, to help him know what he can do to help him. When that didn't change anything about Hitoshi's behavior, Denki moved one of his hands to Hitoshi's cheek, using his thumb again to stroke it gently. But still, Hitoshi didn't respond.
Denki was running out of options. He pulled his hands back and moved them to Hitoshi's hands, taking them in his. They were much larger and broader than his, much more coarse and rough around the edges. He pulled the limp hands to his face and planted a few soft kisses on his knuckles. Denki pulled away to look back up at Hitoshi, his golden eyes still holding compassion and nothing but love, love that Hitoshi didn't feel like he truly deserved.
"Hitoshi. Honey, it's okay." He sighed. "Talk to me. We can work this out."
After what felt like an eternity of staying silent, Hitoshi finally found words to say to him. "Denki…" He hiccuped. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry." He kept repeating the end of his sentence over and over, breathlessly repeating the words 'I'm sorry' as he let his neck go slack and hung his head, shaking it slowly.
"I told you, baby." Denki sighed. "It's okay, I'm okay."
"No- no, it's not." Hitoshi choked. "I- I'm a monster… I'm a monster."
"Hitoshi- no, you're not," Denki responded. "No one's saying that."
"Denki…" Hitoshi sighed. "I promised you… I… I promised you I wouldn't… and I did it. I fuckin’ did it, Denks…”
"That doesn't make you a monster," Denki stated, his voice soft. His thumbs had started moving in circles again, drawing faint impressions into the back of Hitoshi's palms. "So what, you broke a promise? I told you, I'm okay."
"No…" Hitoshi retorted. "I- I still did it… and I promised I'd never do that. You- you trusted me with that and I-"
"Hitoshi- do I look mad?" Denki asked incredulously. "I'm not."
Hitoshi weakly lifted his head to look at Denki. "W… why?"
"Because I know you didn't mean it, babe," Denki replied.
"No… No, I did it. I- I wasn't thinking, and it was the first thing that crossed my mind... I just didn't want to be angry with you anymore and... Oh god..." Hitoshi sighed, hanging his head again. "Fuck, I'm so sorry..."
"Toshi…" Denki moved a hand back to Hitoshi's cheek and picked up the violet-haired man's head. "If you had truly meant it, you wouldn't be reacting like this right now."
Hitoshi didn't know how to respond. It was mainly his guilt that made him feel so terrible, but that doesn't change the fact that he still did it. He wriggled his hands from Denki's hold and pressed them into his forehead, letting out a small but furious growl. He was so frustrated with himself, wanting nothing more than to disappear and never have to face Denki again. Hitoshi never wanted to be the best: not better than his peers, not better than his mentors, or better than anyone. He just wanted to be something more than the kid who was bound to be a villain. All he ever wanted was to be something special after having spent so long as the underdog, and he feared letting people down... and he knew what he just did to Denki was definitely that.
He knew Denki deserved much better, yet every time… he stayed with him.
Denki scooted closer to the toilet, his head between Hitoshi's legs, and rested against one of his knees. Golden eyes looked longingly, trying to find the indigo that he loved so much to see, but Hitoshi wasn't looking at him.
"Denki… why the hell are you still here?" Hitoshi muttered. "All I do is cause you pain and hurt you. I'm stupid and stubborn, I- I don't deserve you, but you… you just can't get the hint… It's for your own good. You'd be happier without me."
Denki cocked an eyebrow, pulling his head up from Hitoshi's knee. "What the fuck are you on?"
Hitoshi flinched, unprepared for Denki's sudden bluntness. "N- nothing... what?"
"Okay, you know what?" Denki chuckled. He sounded exasperated, but he wasn't mad. "You want to know why I'm still here? Fine, I'll tell you."
Denki cleared his throat and began. "I stayed because I… I feel incomplete without you. Like, you're my other half, my rock, my everything, my entire world… You're so special to me, you don't even know. You and I have been inseparable since we were first years, and that's not changing any time soon. And when you say all you do is cause me 'pain'... you don't. I can't think of one time, not even now, when you've caused me pain or hurt me purposefully. Also, the 'I don't deserve you' and 'you'd be happier without me' stuff isn't true either. That's all your head talking, babe. I'm gonna beat up the asshole in your head that keeps feeding you these bullshit lies. I'm dead serious."
Hitoshi couldn't help but let out a small shaky laugh. This fuckin' dork, He thought to himself.
Denki then sat upon his knees, lifting his body to be somewhat eye level with Hitoshi, and continued, "I stayed, and I'm staying because I care about you, and I know you care about me. I don't give a fuck what anyone has said to you about you or your quirk, fuck them. Fuck them all. I don't care about them, 'cause they don't matter to us. I know you, and you're not a villain, not a bad guy, not a goddamn monster. Hell, even if you were, I'd still love you the way you are because it's you. It's always been you. I've never wanted anyone else like I've wanted you, baby."
Denki stopped, a soft smile spreading across his face. He sat back down and rested his head back against the inside of Hitoshi's knee. "Is that enough of a reason for you?"
Hitoshi was still trying to process what Denki had just said to him. The fact that someone this compassionate and loving just waltzed into his life one day, and now he's sitting in front of him, committing to being in it for the long haul. It was all so overwhelming, so many feelings that Hitoshi had never felt before. "Yeah… yeah. I guess it is." Hitoshi replied with a shaky smile.
"Good." Denki giggled. "I'm glad to know you FINALLY believe me."
“Denks?” Hitoshi piped up.
"Mmm?" Denki hummed.
"I… I love you." Hitoshi muttered, gently taking Denki's hands back into his. "I'm sorry for snapping at you. This is all my fault and… and I… I never meant to make you upset. I just… I just want you to be happy… and- and I want to be happy with you… but I don't want you to… to settle, you know? I mean, I just… I just want to be what you want in your life. I want us… this… to be enough." He could start to feel tears sting the corners of his eyes again, and he was viciously fighting to keep them in. He hated crying in front of anybody, especially Denki.
Denki's expression softened into a smile, and he sat back upon his knees, pressing his forehead to his. "It's always going to be enough for me, baby. It's enough." He sighed.
That phrase was what did it. What broke every force in his body that was trying to keep Hitoshi from crying. That was all he needed to hear.
It's enough.
Hitoshi started to feel his body start trembling again, and the tears streamed freely down his cheeks. Quiet choked sobs bubbled out of his throat from behind clenched teeth. Without warning, Hitoshi leaned down and wrapped his arms around Denki's torso, holding him tight to his body, or at least as close as they could in the awkward position they were in. Denki followed suit and sat upon his knees, draping his arms up around Hitoshi's neck and letting his hand card through his soft lavender hair. Soft muttered "thank you" s escaped Hitoshi's lips while his head stayed buried into Denki's shoulder, until Denki pulled back from the hug and rested his hands on either side of Hitoshi's head.
Denki didn't say a word: he just let his eyes slowly trail over every feature of Hitoshi's face, taking their sweet time in admiring the gorgeous man mere centimeters in front of him. Denki's eyes finally landed on Hitoshi's lips, pale pink and slightly rough as they were, before leaning forwards to press his own against them. It wasn't long before Hitoshi tightened his hold on Denki and deepened the kiss, as if Denki would completely disappear if he even considered letting go.
Of course, Denki didn't complain. He would kiss him forever if it wasn't for the human's need to breathe, but he would gladly suffocate to death against Hitoshi's lips. There are worse ways to go out.
Hitoshi slowly pulled away from the kiss and his arms relaxed out of the embrace. "I- I… I love you." Hitoshi hiccuped, gentle tears still dripping slowly down his cheeks.
"I love you too," Denki whispered.
Denki and Hitoshi sat together in the bathroom, and Denki gave Hitoshi all the time he needed to calm down from everything that happened that night. He knew it was mentally taxing on the both of them, and he didn't dare try to invalidate Hitoshi's emotions now. Denki didn't leave Hitoshi's side the entire time and held his hand, hoping that his gentle touch would help Hitoshi calm down faster.
Hitoshi eventually found the strength to stand up from the toilet, outstretching his arms to help Denki to his feet too. When the two found their balance, Hitoshi was quick to engulf Denki in a hug, a proper one this time. Denki let out a happy sigh and relaxed into the hug, his arms resting around Hitoshi's neck again. A warm smile spread across Denki's face, at peace, knowing that Hitoshi was finally coming to his senses again.
Hitoshi hated admitting it, but it was so lovely to feel wanted and loved by Denki, to know that he thought that Hitoshi was as important in his life as Denki was in Hitoshi's life. There was something about Denki that just drew him in without fail: whether that was his peppy and smug attitude, his rather spontaneous sense of humor, or his pretty-boy-like charm; he couldn't pinpoint a single thing that he didn't like about Denki.
And Denki could say the same about Hitoshi any day of the week.
The pair were polar opposites in terms of personality, fashion sense, and taste, so conflicts were bound to happen between them eventually: but by some force of fate, they fit together like perfect puzzle pieces. It was baffling to the both of them how good of a couple they made, but neither of them were about to complain.
Hitoshi did end up sleeping in their bed that night, if nothing else, because neither he nor Denki had any energy left to stay awake any longer. Denki was all over Hitoshi as soon as the two of them crawled into bed together and he stayed clung to Hitoshi's body, like a koala resting on the bow of a tree. This wasn't anything new: Denki was always one to love the sensation of touch, and cuddling was a more-than-everyday activity for the two of them. Hitoshi didn't mind at all.
That night, Hitoshi was more sure than ever at that moment that there, in their bedroom, in Denki's arms: he was safe and exactly where he needed to be. He had to admit that he had missed this: these passionate times that he could spend with Denki without caring about anyone watching or judging. The times where he didn't have to feel scared or ashamed for showing how much he loved this boy, wherein the silence of the room in his own thoughts, he knew that this was where he was truly the happiest he could ever be.