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Thorfinn and Canute have been in their care for exactly 3 weeks when Askeladd's phone rings. He shoves it between his shoulder and his ear -- he's off work and busy playing homemaker, stirring a pot of spaghetti sauce (whose box directions he followed, but still smells like burnt shit).
"Hello, this is the Principal of Heldart Gray Prep School."
He sighs. "It's Thorfinn, isn't it."
"Yes."
"Fuck's sake."
--
"I didn't start it," is all Thorfinn says. They ran out of chairs in the principal's office so he's in a cheap metal foldout, arms crossed, eyes fixed on the wall.
The poor bastard he'd beaten up is sitting with a carefully bandaged face in the good chair, leather bound and made of mahogany, pouting like a child half his age. "Yes you did. I never hit you!"
"Hey, fuck you man."
"Thorfinn." He's so not used to this stuff -- the kids like Bjorn way better, and Askeladd is preferred just above chores and the hell that is puberty on their list. But Bjorn is gone, property of the pigs for the day since their court case is still pending and he isn't even allowed to pick up his phone. If there was a snowball's chance in hell that he could swap their positions he would, but.
Thorfinn gives him a look like he could spit on him, but instead just turns away. Canute pipes up, hand raised as if he's still in class.
"Um, Papa?"
Askeladd almost cringes -- that part was not his idea. "Yeah."
"Can I talk to you in the hallway, please?"
He guesses he can't say no, though he really wants to. Even the shittiest parts of his past, watching people die, ordering the shit he's ordered -- it all somehow seems rosy in comparison to this bullshit. He thinks this over as they step out the door together.
Canute is wringing his hands in his jacket, a 'self-soothe gesture' he thinks the shrink calls it. He does it a lot. "This is all my fault, Papa."
"What are you talking about?"
"That boy, he's -- he's a bully. He's been stealing my things, and pushing me around, and at lunch period he called Thorfinn and I the," down to a whisper, "f-word."
"Fuck?"
"Papa!"
"What?"
"No, he called us… the other one. Fag."
Askeladd feels his fingers twitching. "Did he, now?"
"Yes. And then Thorfinn wasn't going to do anything, but he saw I was upset, I think. So he attacked him."
"This kid's the reason your history book went missing last week too, I'd wager?"
"Yes,"
"And you didn't tell us this, why?"
"I -- I didn't want to be a bother," self-soothe, "So soon."
Askeladd sighs, pats the kid on the shoulder and pokes his head back in. "Hey, Mr. Whatsyourface. Other kid's dad. How about we go have a chat, huh? Man-to-man."
In the good chair, the fat man hesitates -- he looks to Thorfinn, his arms still crossed, then the principal.
"C'mon, I won't bite. Just a chat."
They stroll back into the office a full twenty minutes later. Canute is still obediently waiting in the hall, counting the tiles on the floor. The other kid's dad is white as a sheet and becomes a panicked whirlwind picking up his kid by the arm, babbling out something about "seeking other education options for my son" and fleeing the scene faster than anyone can try to stop him.
"Good talk, buddy!" Askeladd calls after him before he rounds the corner.
After he watched his adversary get forcibly dragged out of the building one would think Thorfinn would be grateful -- as it is he's still just staring out the door. He looks back up at Askeladd, but Askeladd is already snapping his fingers and grabbing the principal's attention.
"How's a week's suspension sound to you, Principal, hm? Good?"
She is just as dumbstruck, but finally nods. Askeladd leaves with the kids in awkward tow, and mentally he pats himself on the back for not checking to see their reactions.
They crawl into the back of the van and even Thorfinn buckles up without being told. They're quiet for another moment before he huffs, "So, what the fuck did you say to him?"
"What? Nothing! We just talked."
"Yeah, right."
"It was all very friendly, I assure you. He agreed to take the kid to another school," he adjusts the mirrors -- they're still set high for Bjorn -- "And I even told him if I ever see him or Snotnose Jr. again I'll show them a magic trick."
"A magic trick?" Canute asks. Oh, good boy. Playing right in.
"Yeah," Oh it's just a whisper of the thrill he used to get, threatening some pathetic fuck who made a mistake he'll regret forever, but he can feel his eyes darkening, his pupils dilating anyway, "I'll make both their dumb asses disappear." He wheels around to reverse the van. The kids are looking at him like he's a Disney villain come to life, wide-eyed and tight-lipped. "You kids want some ice cream? I know I do."