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You felt the sting in your eyes as your hands shook, clutching the blanket around you.
It was nothing new to you - this was another panic attack.
Though you were used to dealing with it alone, this time - it was just too much.
Too much, that you found yourself being unable to breathe.
"Wilbur." You muttered. "I-I need Wilbur."
Reaching out for your phone, you scrambled as you scrolled towards Wilbur's contact.
Spotting his contact, you nearly pressed call when you hesitated for a moment, thumb hovering over the call button.
Should you really contact him, especially at this time of the night?
Your grip on the phone tightened.
What if you're just too annoying? You're too clingy, too stupid — someone who cannot function alone-
The thoughts ceased when your phone hummed, signifying that you had accidentally pressed the call button in the midst of your internal dilemma.
No, no, no!
As you felt your throat getting tight, your fingers rushed to immediately cancel the call.
After the phone's hum stopped, you shakily exhaled as you run your fingers through your hair - internally screaming and hoping that Wilbur ignored your sudden call.
Turning your phone off, you flipped it down to at least focus on yourself, until you were interrupted by the phone's vibration - signifying that someone had messaged you.
Turning it back on and unlocking it, you read the message and inhaled sharply.
( Wilby )
(Y/N), darling.
( Wilby )
Is something the matter?
You stopped, thinking of anything — any excuse as to not worry him.
( Y/N )
nothing
( Y/N )
just wanted to hear your voice
( Y/N )
and stuff
( Y/N )
haha just ignore it or something
You bit your lip as you nervously stared at the chat, the typing bubble stopping and continuing - almost as if Wilbur was struggling to think of a response.
It then disappears completely, much to your disappointment.
Eyes closing, you squeezed it shut for a moment.
Did you really expect Wilbur to be concerned for you?
When you look again, there was still no response.
I'm an idiot.
Your pondering was cut short when your phone flashes and played it's ringtone.
Wilby is calling...
You contemplated on whether you should answer it or not. With a shaky sigh, you finally decided to answer.
Tapping on the green button, you put your phone in your ear.
"Hello?"
"Hi."
The sound of Wilbur's voice, albeit a little raspy since he presumably woke up, made your heart race - distracting you from your internal struggles, even for a moment.
"So," you pause. "W-what's up?"
You internally chastised yourself for stuttering.
Wilbur hesitated for a bit - you hoped he didn't notice.
"You wanted to hear my voice," he sat up on his bed. "Am I right?"
"Well, yeah, but..." You glanced around the room and wrapped your arms around yourself.
"You really don't have to do this, though."
"It's alright." Wilbur reassured you, as his gaze fell on his bedside clock.
"Is something... wrong?"
Your mouth opened to say something, but no words came out - a sudden white noise rang in your ears, making your breath ragged and unsteady.
"(Y/N)?"
You cleared your throat. "Sorry, this was silly of me." You murmured. "You should go back to sleep."
The call fell silent.
"I'm... I'm gonna hang up, alright?"
You thumbs reached for the button to end the call when Wilbur interrupted you.
"Wait!" Wilbur intervened, voice laced with concern. "Don't..."
"Don't hang up."
You stopped.
"Please, (Y/N)." Wilbur pleaded. "Tell me what's wrong."
"Wilbur, I..."
"... Please."
Silence once again, filled the call.
You struggled to find words, almost as if something stopped you from telling him - the ringing in your ears becoming worse.
Tears welled up in your eyes as you choked back a sob - frantically rubbing your eyes as you took in a shaky breath.
"I don't know, Wilbur." You croaked as you felt your throat tighten.
"I don't know..."
Wilbur faltered before he shook his head. "I'm going there, alright?"
"Wilbur, no, you don't have to-"
"I insist." Wilbur interrupts.
"Please, just let me do this."
"..."
You gulped, bringing your knees to your chest.
"... Okay."
You wrapped the blanket around your form, staring at the clock as you nervously picked at your nails - a nasty habit you picked up when you were anxious.
You had long since moved to the sofa to wait for Wilbur's arrival ever since he hung up the phone call.
Looking around the living room, you found your mind wandering to the depths of your despair.
Perhaps subjecting Wilbur to your problems was a mistake.
You shouldn't have done that. Soon, he'll leave you alone.
Alone, alone, alone.
Anxiously tapping your feet on the floor, you thought and thought.
What were you even going to say when he gets here?
You can't just let him come here and then ask him to immediately leave.
'Hey, I'm sorry that you came here - but I swear I'm fine now.'
Yeah, right.
You don't know if you're lying to him, or yourself.
In frustration, you grabbed fistfuls of your hair, the sensation of your scalp being tugged was painful, but you couldn't bring yourself to care.
Leaning back into the sofa, you closed your eyes and shrunk in to yourself.
Breathe, (Y/N), breathe.
Show Wilbur that you're fine.
You're fine.
A soft knock interrupted you, followed by the familiar voice of Wilbur. "(Y/N), are you in there?"
You clench your jaw, taking a deep inhale, before you stood up to head towards the door.
Unlocking it, you open it to see Wilbur's form towering over you, and look to his eyes.
His face was painted in worry as he scanned your form.
Dark circles were present underneath your eyes and your hair a disheveled mess and anxiously picking at your nails - have you been taking care of yourself?
"It's okay." Wilbur whispered as he let his large hands envelop yours. "I'm here for you."
His fingers were calloused, presumably coming from playing a guitar. You had always loved it whenever he played it.
You felt your eyes gloss over, desperately rubbing your eyes to fight back tears, drawing a long breath.
"Wilbur," you rasped as you averted your gaze from his, your body starting to tremble without your knowledge. "I'm sorry I made you come here."
His gaze softened, sighing before he inched closer. "Oh darling..." Wilbur whispered, pulling you in for an embrace. "Everything will be alright."
He rubbed circles in your back to soothe you as you wept, gripping on his shirt tightly as you quietly apologized again and again.
It felt like an eternity had passed, until Wilbur hushed you and lifted one arm on your legs and the other supporting your back.
He was carrying you.
You leaned closer to his chest, craving the warmth that he radiated.
His scent reminded you of pine, sweet and refreshing - it reminded you of nature.
The tears have already dried out and have left you tired and exhausted.
He planted a kiss on your forehead before he headed towards your bedroom.
Wilbur gingerly placed your form on the bed, and then covered it with a blanket.
You hid yourself under the covers and attempted to thank him, but your throat felt dry - so you opted to stay silent instead.
Oh, what would you do without Wilbur?
"I should probably get some water for you." Wilbur stated, scratching his head. "I'll be right back."
You sat up out of protest when he turned his back and stood, tugging on his arm.
"Oh?" Wilbur stopped and turned to face you. "Yes, darling?"
"Just..." You paused, unable to meet his eyes. It was a little bit embarassing for you, but you needed him.
"Stay?"
"Please."
Wilbur went silent before he nodded, and chuckled. How could he turn down such an endearing offer?
"Alright."
He put his glasses on the bedside table, before he joined you, climbing to your side.
"C'mere." He offers, arms open - open for you, and only you.
You graciously accepted by inching closer until your head was positioned underneath his chin.
He draped his arms over you, engulfing you with warmth, while you came closer to his chest. It made you feel safe and protected.
You took a deep inhale, taking in his scent and ingraining it in your mind for you wanted to remember this moment forever.
Again, silence filled the air, but this time, it was comforting - for Wilbur was here.
"Wilbur?"
"Yes, darling?"
You stopped for a moment, closing your eyes as your lips tugged into a small smile as you cried tears of joy.
"Thank you."
"For what?"
"For everything."
Wilbur shifted slightly, before he murmured.
"Anything for you, my love."
Tired and exhausted, you felt yourself drifting off to sleep - the smell of pine being the last thought you had before you finally went to sleep.
With Wilbur, everything is gonna be alright.