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"It's not about you," the Ancient one had told him in the midst of the storm that broke after she hit the ground. Their bodies close both in the operating room and the window of the cafeteria in their astral forms.
The words echoed in his mind in her voice as he stood on Titan. The possibilities played in his brain, the only possibility that outside forces would let them win repeated. That horrible moment that will cause pain and more. The lack of himself around to do anything for those five years. The lack Tony will have in knowing him at all as he had learned of Tony. He will lose the privilege of learning from Tony.
And now looking down the barrel of those years and minutes later he dreaded it all the more.
"One," He gestured and mouthed before turning away.
"It's not about you," Stephen whispered looking back as the clever man pulled a trick that had worked so well in his life. Thanos watched Tony's mouth and not his hands. He had been so proud to do that to Fury.
It was not about what he wanted and hoped.
It was not about the connection he had wanted to forge.
It was about watching this beloved man; now a father, say four of his favorite words. "I am Iron Man." And snap the gauntlet.
He never got to know the man as an actual father. He never got to be a distant spark in the man's life. Stephen never impacted Tony as much as Stephen had been impacted by Tony from his perspective.
It was not about him. Stephen reminded himself.
It was not about his wants or desires.
It was him or the timeline and the timeline always wins.