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Manon didn’t really think it through. How could she?
The second she saw his little face and his pink tongue hanging out from his almost toothless mouth at the shelter, she was sold. And perhaps adopting a puppy when she had unbelievably tiring shifts at work hadn’t been the greatest of her ideas, but oh well. She was totally not going to leave that little soul behind.
She knew she would be fine, anyway. Asterin lived only two blocks away, and she had been at the shelter in the first place because her cousin wanted to get a dog. She ended up not making up her mind (for reasons Manon couldn’t wrap her head around — they were all cute beyond words), so she knew Asterin wouldn’t say no to dog-sitting. None of her friends would, really, so she was fine.
Or so she thought.
Little Abraxos made himself at home in her apartment faster than she had expected. He was quite intelligent too, as potty training didn’t become such an issue. A few slips here and there, but he was mostly okay. He was a happy dog as well, which filled her heart the most. Two days in, and Manon already knew she had made the best decision of her life.
Asterin loved Abraxos, and he clearly loved her back. Her cousin had gone on some walks with them so that the puppy would get used to her presence, but Abraxos seemed to have accepted her from the very start. Which was a big relief — that was one less problem she had to worry about.
When Elide and Aelin heard about the new member of the Blackbeak family, they were quick to rush to her apartment to meet their new nephew, as they now called him. Manon didn’t object to that title.
“He’s so energetic,” Elide gasped as she threw Abraxos his orange ball down the hall for the tenth time, “And big!”
“And we’ve just come back from a walk,” Manon sighed, and watched happily as the dog ran back towards Elide, “I don’t know what I’m going to do when he gets even bigger.”
“I will gladly kidnap him for a couple of hours,” Aelin smiled as she scratched him behind his ears, “Or days.”
Manon smirked, “Will Rowan approve, though?”
The girl rolled her eyes playfully, and took Abraxos between her arms, who happily complied with the cuddles, “He would never say no to a playdate for Fleefoot. Am I right, you little fluffy ball?”
Manon was about to agree when her doorbell rang, startling the three of them. Abraxos growled, which he had never done before, and Manon momentarily freaked out.
“It’s Lorcan”, Elide got up to her feet, “I told him about Abraxos and he got so excited I couldn’t say no,” she gave Manon an apologetic smile, “Sorry about that.”
“It’s fine,” the girl waved a nonchalant hand in front of her face. Lorcan wasn’t the best company she could think for, but she’d been trying lately. Both of them had, for Elide. The girl then disappeared down the hall and towards the front door.
“Lorcan, huh?”, Aelin raised a knowing eyebrow.
“What did I miss?”, Asterin whispered, clearly too amused by the whole situation.
Manon smirked, “They have been hanging out for some weeks now,” she rolled her eyes, “We all know what that means.”
Before her friends could respond, the two of them walked into the living room. The second Lorcan’s eyes laid on Abraxos, his whole expression changed. She had never seen him look so soft, so welcoming, so… not like him. She decided that she liked him better like this.
Was this how she looked too, so sappy, when she was with Abraxos? Manon couldn’t say she was bothered by it.
“Hey, boy,” the man kneeled down to match his level, and extended his palms upwards so the puppy could sniff him. She remembered then that Lorcan had two dogs, so he probably knew how to handle them. But Abraxos didn’t move, “Come here, puppy.”
“Go on, baby,” Manon encouraged him, but the dog still didn’t move. Then, he whimpered and went to hide behind Elide, which made everyone laugh.
“He’s so cute,” Aelin smiled, “Seems like you’re too scary for him, Lorcan.”
“Seems like it,” he chuckled, and tried to call for him again without any luck. The puppy stayed hidden behind Elide, no sign of him changing his attitude any sooner.
Manon was quick to react. No matter if they weren’t the best of friends, the last thing she wanted was to make Lorcan feel bad when he had taken the time to go all the way to her apartment, “He probably thinks you’re too tall and big,” she explained, which may have been true.
As far as she knew, Abraxos was only used to the girls who worked at the shelter, and obviously none of them had Lorcan’s physique. She wondered if dogs could smell testosterone, and if perhaps he felt scared because he thought Lorcan was too...imposing. She made a mental note to read more about that later.
Abraxos ended up not getting close to him, but eventually he came out of his hiding spot and laid down on his little bed. However, his behaviour had been something completely new and unexpected to Manon, and it raised a tiny red flag in her head. Perhaps she was worrying too much about something that may not happen again, but she needed to see it with her own eyes. She needed to know if her suspicions were correct.
So, the next day, she sent a text to the group chat inviting the boys over to test her theory.
“Abraxos’s favourite Uncle is here!”, Fenrys’s voice echoed through her apartment before she even heard the front door, “Oh, and Gavriel too.”
Manon shook her head in amusement before following the sound of their footsteps. She caught Abraxos looking right at them with big eyes from his position on the couch, and she mentally crossed her fingers. This had to work.
Fenrys wiggled a bag of treats in front of him, catching the puppy’s attention even more. But he still didn’t leave his spot between the cushions, “Come here, boy! Come with Uncle Fenrys, who is by far the greatest Uncle you will ever have.”
Gavriel laughed next to him, and started blowing kisses at him so he would run towards them. But it didn’t happen, and Manon was starting to get nervous. Her theory couldn’t be true — she didn’t want it to be.
“Try going up to him slowly,” she told them, and mentally hoped that Abraxos wouldn’t run away.
The two of them started taking careful steps towards the puppy, but as soon as they reached the end of the couch, Abraxos started whining and looking worriedly at Manon. Fenrys and Gavriel stopped right on their tracks, hearts racing at his unexpected reaction.
“You weren’t kidding,” Gavriel thought out loud, and watched as the dog hopped off the sofa and ran towards his owner.
“I’m so sorry, guys,” she gave them an apologetic look as she rubbed Abraxos’s torso in an attempt to calm him down, “I don’t know why this keeps happening. I thought it would be just about Lorcan because he’s so—”
“Big and intimidating?”, Fenrys gave her a knowing look, “Happens to the best of us.”
She almost asked him what he meant, then decided she probably didn’t want to know, so she continued, “But it seems to be a problem with men in general, maybe? I don’t know.”
“Huh,” Fenrys tilted his head, “Let me Google it.”
Manon looked down at the now calm puppy sleeping at her feet, and frowned. There should be a logical explanation for all of it, but even if there was, she couldn’t help but think this was quite the inconvenience. Her options for babysitters had now been cut in half, and she really needed all the help she could get.
After a few minutes, Fenrys seemed to have found absolutely nothing factual. Some puppy blogs pointed out to them being scared of men with high levels of testosterone while others said male dogs were likely to gravitate towards them, which obviously wasn’t the case. She felt lost, and profoundly confused. This couldn’t be a normal reaction, could it?
She considered asking the vet on their next visit, but—
“Hello!”
Her heart jumped when she heard his deep voice, mentally cursing for having forgotten to close the damn front door again. She should probably pay a little more attention to that. Dorian’s head then peeked into the living room, a huge smile flashing in his face the moment he spotted Abraxos at Manon’s feet.
“Don’t get your hopes up, buddy,” Fenrys gave him a knowing look, “He’s scared of men.”
Dorian frowned, “He’s what, now?”
“I don’t know what’s gotten into him,” Manon sighed as she tried not to blush under his gaze.
Get a grip
, “He got scared of Lorcan yesterday and now he’s scared of Gavriel and Fenrys too.”
“But I’m still his favourite Uncle,” Fenrys pointed an accusatory finger at Dorian, his words a warning, “Don’t even bother, Havilliard.”
Dorian put his hands up in defeat, then turned his attention back to the puppy. Sitting down on the floor, he patted the ground in front of him, catching his attention. But Manon knew exactly what was going to happen next. Whines, running away, shaking. She braced herself.
Abraxos sat down at her feet, looking right at Dorian. At least twenty second had passed, and no signs of distress. But Manon knew better than to get her hopes up. If he was scared of everyone else, there was simply no logical way he wouldn’t be scared of Dorian too. He wasn’t as bulky as Roan, but Dorian was… big. He was tall, shoulders broad, huge hands.
Her heart suddenly jumped. God, why was she getting nervous just by thinking about Dorian’s complexion? Was she fifteen? She mentally shook her head, and focused her attention back on the rather interesting scene that was unfolding in front of her.
“Come here, baby,” Dorian encouraged him.
Abraxos then wagged his tail.
“Wait a damn second,” she heard Fenrys’s voice somewhere in the background, but she was so shocked by what happened next that every sense became a blur.
Abraxos ran towards Dorian the way he would run towards Asterin or Elide, and proceeded to lick his hands as he attempted to pet him. Dorian laughed at the puppy’s excitement, clearly too swept into the moment to even consider what it all meant.
“He likes you,” Manon’s voice came out as a whisper, and she doubted he had heard her. But she didn’t care. All she cared about was Abraxos kissing Dorian all over, letting the man pet him, wagging his tail so fast she thought it would fly away.
“Looks like I was wrong,” Fenrys leaned casually on one of the cushions as he watched them with an amused smirk, “Dorian’s not his Uncle. He’s his Dad .”
Dorian’s heart stopped, and he made the mistake of looking right at Manon. He swore he saw a hint of a blush on her pale cheeks, but he was too flustered himself to tell. It was during times like these when he tried to avoid her gaze at all costs. Because one simple look at those eyes and it was over. The gold in them was simply spellbinding. He wondered then if Manon knew what effect she had on him, what she would think of him if she found out.
He wished to know what ran through her mind when she looked at him, but at the same time he was madly scared of finding out the truth.
“He seems to like you,” Manon’s voice brought him back to reality. She gave him a small smile, “Against all odds.”
He smiled back, and scratched Abraxos behind his ears. He was the cutest puppy he had ever seen, that went without question, and the fact that he liked him made his heart full.
“It’s just weird,” Gavriel frowned, “How’s Dorian any different from the rest of us?”
“Because he’s his Dad!”, Fenrys exclaimed dramatically, “Of course he’s gonna love his Dad. Don’t you, puppy? Ah shit, I forgot he hates me. Nevermind kid, don’t answer.”
Manon rolled her eyes, “He doesn’t hate you,” she stated, “He’s just going through a phase. Or something like that.”
Fenrys ended up texting the groupchat a picture of Abraxos and Dorian playing on Manon’s living room floor and announcing that Abraxos had a Dad now, to which everyone replied that obviously the puppy was going to love Dorian. But Manon tried not to think about it too much, or else her mind would travel places it shouldn’t be in at all. Crush was such a childish word. Manon hated it for many reasons. But whatever. For the lack of a better word, she didn't have a crush on Dorian, absolutely not. She just loved him a lot. As friends. Just like she loved Asterin or Elide.
Well.
Perhaps not exactly like that , but it was not a crush.
She had a crush on Dorian once, a couple of years back, after a nasty breakup with her ex. But she blamed that one on her inability to think clearly, and the fact that Dorian had been there every minute of every hour to make sure she was truly okay. She mistook his concern for something else, but she eventually managed to snap out of it.
There was simply no way she had a crush on Dorian, and he couldn’t have a crush on her, either. He had known her for years — he would’ve made a move. He had dated other people while she had been available, so it wasn’t as if he had missed his chance. Dorian wasn’t into her, and that was alright. Or, at least, she liked to pretend it was.
But the whole situation with Abraxos wasn’t helping her at all.
Dorian simply had no rights to look so… soft while playing with her puppy. Who did he think he was? He seemed to have fallen in love with Abraxos, which she couldn’t really blame him for, but it came with him spending a lot more time at her apartment, going with them on walks.
It wasn’t a bad thing at all — Dorian was one of her best friends and she loved spending time with him, but… Old feelings that should’ve died a long time ago were starting to resurface, and as much as she tried to drown them back down, they always managed to come back up to the surface.
Stupid stupid stupid.
Now, as he threw Abraxos’s orange ball into the sunset, watching with an amused smirk as the dog chased after it, she doubted she would ever manage to extinguish those feelings at all.
“He’s such a smart puppy,” she heard Dorian mutter beside her. Hands in his pockets, he turned around to look at her. The last lights of the day made the mesmerising blue of his eyes stand out even more.
Abraxos ran back towards Dorian, jumping onto him without any warning. He laughed as he rubbed him behind the ears, a spot he had learned was his favourite.
Manon couldn’t help the soft smile that drew on her lips, “He likes you a lot, you know?”
“I can tell,” his smile had never looked brighter. He kneeled down to pick up the ball, then threw it again, “Has he gotten any better about his ‘I hate men’ phase?”
“Not really, no,” Manon frowned, recalling the day before, when she had run into Lysandra and Aedion on their way to work and Abraxos had hidden behind her legs when Aedion attempted to pet him, “It’s just you.”
“Fenrys is pretty keen on the dad theory,” he half-chuckled, trying to sound nonchalant about it. He wanted to find out what Manon thought about the implications, but he was not going to risk sounding as desperate to know as he really was.
“Um, yeah,” she mimicked his laugh, hoping she didn’t sound too awkward. Her heart accelerated, and she felt like a total mess, “About that,” Dorian looked briefly back at her with curious eyes before Abraxos stole all his attention again, “It’s okay if you don’t, you know, feel comfortable about it.”
“What?”, he frowned, “Of course I’m not uncomfortable, Manon. Why would you say that?”
She wrapped her arms around herself to shield her from the sudden cold breeze, “I don’t want you to feel like you’ve got any obligations to be with him, with us, all the time. Just that.”
“I’m here because I want to be,” he looked back at her, and for a second she thought she saw hurt in his eyes, “I thought you knew that.”
“And I know that,” she hurried to say, “Just… Just in case.”
They stayed at the park for a little longer in comfortable silence, but Dorian could easily sense that something was wrong. A dark cloud of unsaid words seemed to have settled over them, and it was about to pour everything down.
The fact that Manon had even considered the possibility of him feeling uncomfortable about being called ‘Abraxos’s Dad’ hurt more than it should. He understood where she was coming from, really, but still itched inside. Because of course he wanted to be a puppy dad, especially if Manon was the mom. Who wouldn’t?
Then, it hit him. Perhaps she didn’t want him to be Abraxos’s Dad. Could that be it?
He walked her back to her apartment, as it was dark already when they left the park, and she invited him over for dinner. He couldn’t bring himself to say no.
As she was busy putting a pizza in the oven, he paced around her living room while freaking out about why he was pacing in the first place. He was nervous, and he didn’t understand why. Dinner at Manon’s apartment happened at least once a week for him, and this shouldn’t feel any different. And yet it did.
Abraxos was wagging his tail happily and chasing Manon around the kitchen, hoping his intense stare would lure her into giving him human food, and Dorian thought he could get used to it. He could get used to coming back home from work and finding them curled up together on the couch, waiting for him. But it felt too good to be true.
An hour later, he found himself lying on said couch, Abraxos curled up over his stomach area, some weird movie Manon had chosen playing in the background. Manon was sitting on the loveseat, apparently not paying that much attention to the screen either. When his phone buzzed next to him, he understood why.
She had sent not one, not two, but three pictures of him and Abraxos all cuddled up, and everyone seemed to be enjoying them a bit too much.
Aelin : of course he loves dorian who else isn’t surprised
Asterin : such a daddy’s boy smh aunt Asterin is cooler
Fenrys : do u think if i dressed up as Dorian i could fool him?
Rowan : ignore him he’s drunk
Rowan : cute puppy btw
Dorian smiled at his screen, “They’re really invested in this relationship, huh?”
“Are you really that shocked?”, she arched a playful eyebrow as she stood up slowly and kneeled in front of them so she could pet Abraxos. Dorian tried not to think about their close proximity. He smiled, and proceeded to pet him as well. Abraxos rolled on his back, enjoying the attention all too much.
They had both apparently decided to ignore how late it really was. It wasn’t the first time Dorian had crashed at Manon’s couch, but it had been a while, and something about it was now making him nervous.
He would be lying if he said he had never seen Manon as something more, as something else. Countless times had he imagined what they could be if he was a bit more confident. He liked to think he was somewhat of a risk-taker in his daily life, but not when it came to her. Not when one of his most treasured friendships was at risk.
Dorian didn’t look at her with butterflies and happiness, not really. He looked at her with logic and reality, but at the same time he wondered if there was a fairytale awaiting them. He had heard too many stories about best friends turned lovers, then strangers, and his heart broke at the mere thought of losing her like that. Of losing her at all.
“You’re falling asleep?”, he resisted the urge to laugh as he watched Manon slowly leaning her head on the couch while sitting on the floor, her hand still hovering over Abraxos, but not really petting him.
She struggled to keep her eyes open, “Maybe.”
Dorian chuckled, and attempted to move, “I’ll let you two get your beauty sleep then,” but Abraxos was too heavy even for a puppy, and he didn’t have much luck.
Manon’s hand gripped his wrist, stopping him, “Don’t,” when she realised how harsh it had sounded, she quickly cleared her throat, “I mean, you can stay here if you want to. It’s pretty late and Abraxos looks comfortable on top of you.”
He gave her a soft smile, “Alright. But you’re not sleeping on the floor.”
“I’m too tired to move,” she groaned.
“Come up here.”
She hesitated, not really knowing what he meant. His big, tall body occupied the entire couch, leaving no space unless…
“Come here,” he insisted, and seeing that she was essentially falling asleep on the floor, she did as she was told.
If Dorian wasn’t overthinking this, neither should she. Without another word, she climbed up next to him, lying down with her back pressed to his side, feeling as one of Dorian’s arms circled around her waist to keep her from falling.
“Comfortable?”
The size of the couch wasn’t ideal for two people and a big puppy, but it felt strangely nice.
“Mm,” she mumbled happily, eyes already closed, “You?”
He was still lying on his back with Abraxos over his stomach, “Not the best position to sleep in, but I don’t really want to move him,” he admitted apologetically.
She immediately opened her eyes and struggled as she turned around to face them. She poked the dog carefully on her head, “Wake up, sleepy head. Let Dorian move, come on.”
“Yeah,” he groaned as he pushed himself up slightly, making Abraxos raise his head, “Dad promises to cuddle you later. Deal?”
Manon’s heart jumped at his words, and she tried to ignore the way he had so casually acknowledged his ‘Dad’ role. But she failed. She was now, years later, looking down right at that dark pit of uncertainty again. And she was about to jump.
Abraxos whimpered a little, but he eventually gave in and jumped off the couch in the direction of his puppy bed just a few feet away. Dorian was grateful that he could finally stretch his legs again, and in an instant he laid back down with his front pressed against Manon’s back.
“All set,” he whispered as his arm circled around her waist, holding her steadily. Manon hoped he couldn’t feel the way her heart was about to combust.
She laid still for a very long time. She didn’t know for how long exactly, but it felt like an eternity. Dorian’s breath had evened behind her, and she assumed he had fallen asleep. But she couldn’t.
The movie had ended, Abraxos was sleeping too, and she should’ve probably been as well given the unbelievably long shift she had at work the next morning, but it proved to be impossible.
Perhaps she was overthinking this. Did best friends fall asleep willingly and tangled on couches like that? She would look it up on Reddit it if she could reach her phone, but she was afraid she already knew the answer anyway.
Dorian groaned and shifted behind her, the hand that was loosely hanging over her stomach now holding her closer. His grip was so strong she couldn’t get out. Not that she wanted to, but breathing was slowly becoming a hard task.
“Dorian,” she whispered, but he didn’t move. She tapped on his arm with her fingers, careful not to wake him up too abruptly.
“Mm,” was all she got, but at least it was something.
“Your grip is too tight.”
Dorian’s eyes immediately shot open, taking his arm back, “I’m sorry. Are you okay?”
“Yeah,” she turned around to give him a reassuring smile, “I just couldn’t breathe for a second there.”
“Sorry,” he said again, and ran a hand through his tired face.
It didn’t take long for him to absentmindedly wrap his arm around her again, only that this time she was facing him. He tried to ignore the tingling sensation in his heart as Manon buried her head in his chest, feeling the warmth of his body. They had never cuddled like that, but damn. Nothing had ever felt so right.
For a second he considered touching his lips to her forehead, just to see what it would feel like to be so... so intimate. But he was frozen in place, unable to do anything else other than listening to his own heartbeat.
“Dorian,” her voice was so faint it was barely audible.
“Yes, sweetheart?”
“Thank you for staying,” she felt her cheeks getting warm, “And thank you for loving Abraxos so much.”
He tightened his grip on her, and threw it all out of the window. He wanted nothing else than to make her feel loved, the way she made him feel, so he softly pressed his lips to her warm forehead, lingering for a few seconds so he could remember the sensation later.
“You don’t have to thank me for that,” he mumbled against her skin.
“I wanted to.”
Manon gathered all the strength she had left, and looked up. Dorian’s eyes were already on hers, face so close she would be able to count his freckles if it hadn’t been so dark. At that moment they didn’t need to say anything. Words were meaningless when their eyes said so much.
He thought he was imagining things. He thought he was imagining her breath picking up, slowly inching towards his own, but when her nose bumped into his, he knew. Manon wanted this. She wanted this too. She really did.
Dorian stared into her eyes for confirmation, for a sign that he wasn’t reading all of it wrong. But deep down he knew there wasn’t much room for error — she was cuddled inside his embrace, bodies tangled, nose touching. How could this mean something else?
Perhaps it had been a second, perhaps minutes, but the next thing he felt was the universe exploding around him.
Manon kissed him. She kissed him like his lips were air and she couldn’t breathe. She kissed him and he was hooked, he was addicted.
He knew then that nobody else could make his heart jump like that, his stomach turn in all directions, his head spin. The moment she drew back from his lips and looked right into his eyes, he knew he would follow her to the end of the world.
“I’m sorry,” the words left her lips with such sorrow he almost complained.
Instead, he pressed their lips together again.
Her small hands cupped his face, bringing him even closer. The kiss wasn’t hurried, not needy. Their lips moved in a slow sync, tasting every inch of each other, exploring a new part of their relationship that now felt like home. This was where they had always belonged.
Dorian’s hand was about to reach lower when a new weight on the couch startled them, making them pull away. Soon enough Abraxos’s little head made its way between their bodies, tongue out, demanding all the attention.
Manon chuckled as Abraxos licked her face, “Okay, okay. We love you too, bud. Want to cuddle with us, huh? Is that it?”
He wagged his tail left and right, signaling that it was exactly what he wanted. Dorian was quick to pull him into his embrace, lying him down between the warmth of their bodies.
“Such a spoiled little thing you are,” he cooed while scratching his head, “Just like your Mommy,” he smirked.
“And whose fault is that?”, she arched a playful eyebrow, making him laugh.
“Fine. I'll go spoil Fenrys then,” he teased.
She gave him a look, “You wouldn’t dare.”
He laughed again, making her heart flutter. She loved that sound. Dorian closed the small space between them once more, pressing his lips to hers shortly. It already felt so familiar, so comforting.
“About this,” he gave her a small smile, “I’m willing to give us a try, if you want to.”
“I’d love to,” she smiled shyly at him.
“Good,” he pressed his lips to her forehead again, a gesture he already loved way too much, “How about tomorrow night I make dinner for my favourite spoiled babies?”
Instead of ignoring how her heart jumped inside her chest, she now embraced it. This was how Dorian made her feel, how she made him feel in return, and that meant there was not a better thing in the entire world.
In that moment, she realised that her whole universe consisted of one man and a puppy, and she wouldn’t have it any other way.
She smiled, “Your spoiled babies would love that.”