Chapter Text
Was it fun? Playing with something so fragile as the human heart?
To let two people, breathe the same air. Make them feel the heat of the tip of one’s finger, tracing the other’s skin, eventually finding comfort from the smell of each other’s favorite cologne. Was it entertaining to watch two souls fall in love, thinking that the universe was made only for them, with hopes that one day they would find each other?
The sun witnessed the smile on Jimin’s face the day Yoongi said ‘I love you’. The stars flickered every time their hands brushed against each other as they walk through a narrow alley. The skies cried with Jimin a few times. And when Jimin left, the moon stayed with Yoongi.
There is a word for putting two strangers on the same path; letting them walk it long enough to learn the anatomy of each other’s heart. Then pulling them apart, harshly, because the universe has decided—it wasn’t fate. Their paths were nothing but another crossroad.
There is a word for the unfair pain of loving someone that wasn’t meant for you.
Cruel.
“Jimin-nim, your boyfriend is already waiting outside.” Kira prances in the dance studio, dropping on the floor next to Jimin. Kira’s friends, Jiwan and Katie, both gushed with her the same time Jimin smiled in a blush. The girls have been openly crushing on Jimin’s fiancé every time he comes to pick Jimin up. They are all young. Far younger than Jimin.
Jimin doesn’t mind. If he’s being honest, there is a bit of gratifying feeling when someone else say they are jealous of what they have. What Jimin has. Yes, Yejun will pick him up after his ballet rehearsals no matter what time it finishes because Jimin would be too tired to drive himself home. When Jimin shared that Yejun watched fourteen different cooking videos just to learn how to make Jimin’s favorite dish, they all melt as if that was the sweetest thing in the world. It was sweet. Yejun is sweet.
“Please tell David I’m going first.” Jimin pressed his feet together for one last stretch before getting up. “See you in a month! Enjoy your New Years, alright?”
The girls say yes in unison, waving goodbye to Jimin.
Jimin grabs his bag from the locker, fishing his engagement ring safely tucked in its side pockets. It’s a simple white gold Cartier with nineteen beautiful cuts of diamonds surrounding it. It’s not loud. The ring is subtle and elegant circling Jimin’s finger. He slips it into his finger before leaving the hall, meeting his fiancé with a soft smile. Yejun looks good in his navy-blue suit, tailored to his build because he says it helps to make him look put together. His black hair is pushed back neatly, and his shoes are polished as if they were brand new. People often mistake him for a cold business-only type of man, thanks to his sharp features—but in reality, he is the kind of person that will hold your hand and squeeze it tightly through-out a horror movie. He is the type to leave little post-it notes which you’d find randomly around the house, just so he’d still make you smile even if he’s away on a business trip. Yejun is sweet, and kind, and patient. So so patient.
“Hey, beautiful” Yejun opens the car, letting Jimin settle in his seat before he leans in a whisper “tired?” he asks, leaving a small peck on Jimin’s cheek.
The smell of Versace lingers inches from Jimin. From all the perfume Yejun uses, this is probably the one he likes the most. Jimin reached for his fiancé’s face, kissing him back. “Mh, not anymore.” He says, as if few kisses can erase every strained muscle in his body. It can’t. But it doesn’t hurt to lie once in a while. Especially when his words put such smile in Yejun’s face.
***
“Oh, by the way—Tae wants to know if we’re getting a hotel in Seoul.” Jimin got reminded when he scrolls past Taehyung’s Instagram post. He is already preparing his apartment for the coming holiday. Taehyung has been hosting the New Year’s Eve party for the last four years or so, and this year isn’t any different. “He doesn’t mind if we use one of his guest rooms. He’s insisting, actually.”
They’re in-front of their TV watching HBO, but Jimin isn’t paying attention. He’s on his phone. His back is pressed against Yejun’s side, as Yejun’s right arm bundles him.
“Babe?” Jimin twists his body to see Yejun’s face.
Yejun isn’t saying anything. He has this mix expression of panic, guilt, and that look on his face where he’s already trying to figure his way out of an argument before even getting into one.
“Babe, we are going home for New Year’s.” Jimin repeats, just so he’s sure they are on the same page. “This is not up for debate.”
“Uhm—right, about that…”
“Yejun, we’ve talked about this.” Jimin’s voice sounded somewhat disappointed. Using Yejun’s name instead of his million other endearments for him, dropping the honorifics even though Yejun is four years older. He does this when they’re arguing or talking about something serious like “Yejun, be honest… I fucked up my hair, didn’t I?” Jimin asks in a frown, like one of those characters in Angry Birds and Yejun bites his lips trying not to laugh at the uneven cut at the back of Jimin’s head.
“I know, babe. I know.” He leans in, gently squeezing Jimin’s hand and an apologetic eye matching Jimin’s. “But the chairman moved the Summit on the 28th and then a conference a week after that. I have to be at Chicago for two weeks, at least.”
Jimin doesn’t respond to that. Instead, he peels his gaze off Yejun. He stares blankly at the TV, clearly upset at his fiancé. It’s not the first time he chose work over Jimin.
“Baby… talk to me.” He squeezes again, but Jimin doesn’t budge. “OK. I’ll call Ivan, or Hyun— I’ll tell them I won’t be available. I’ll see what I can do, Jimin.”
“You won’t.” Jimin sighs, finally looking at Yejun.
Yejun exhales, too. He clicks his lips together, “You’re right, I won’t. I need to be at the conference, Jimin-ah—you know that.” Jimin does. They both do. They are both ambitious. Jimin in his ballet career and Yejun in the corporate world. They both do whatever it takes to reach their goals and right now, Jimin knows that the coming Summit will be good for Yejun’s career. If he’s going to get promoted, he wants to earn his title.
Jimin sighs again, this time, much whinier. “Aghh, okay… okay.” He clears his head, accepting defeat. “I’ll cancel our tickets to Seoul and book to Chicago, then. I’ll just call Tae to—”
“What, babe—no! Don’t do that.” Yejun takes Jimin’s phone from his grip, “You are not cancelling on your friends.”
Jimin arched an eyebrow instantly. “If you think I’ll fly back to Korea by myself and let you spend your holiday alone in some musty hotel in Chicago, then you don’t know me at all.” He even raised his tone in attempt to intimidate.
“Okay, first—I’ll be staying at The Peninsula. Second, yes, you are leaving New York without me because I know New Year’s at Taehyung’s place is something you guys do every year. At this point, it’s already a tradition.” Yejun says, brushing his thumb at Jimin’s cheek to curb the forming pout on his lips. “I know you want to go home, baby. You should.”
Jimin pouts, nonetheless. He leans to Yejun again, going back to their original position. They can’t see each other’s faces, but Yejun knows Jimin is sulking, so he embraces him warmer.
“Taehyung wants to meet you. Jungkook, too.” Two years of dating, now engaged, Yejun still hasn’t met any of Jimin’s friends. They are in New York and everyone in Jimin’s life is back in Korea. The distance, time difference, and their busy schedules are cruel to them. Jimin tilts his head to look at Yejun, “At least promise me you’ll try.” He tells him.
Yejun plants a soft assuring kiss on Jimin’s forehead, “Okay, I will. I’ll get the hell out of that musty five-star hotel as soon as I could.” He says, then kissing him again quickly. “I promise.”
They stayed in their sofa, cuddled like that until Jimin falls asleep in Yejun’s arms.
Such a familiar place.
***
“I just left arrival hall!” Jimin arrives with his phone on his ear and Taehyung yelling, ‘yah! move out of the way!’ over the line, followed by two long honks. Jimin laughs, “are you stuck in traffic?”
“No, no… were almost there! It’s just this lady driving like a motherf— oh my gosh, she has a dog!!” Taehyung snaps his mood in an instant, seeing a young golden retriever sneak their head out of the window. “Bunnn, look! Oh my god, so cute!”
Taehyung has always had a candid, sharp tongue but is always soft for everything that he thinks are vulnerable. Jungkook, his boyfriend since forever, have grown accustomed to Taehyung’s mood changes.
The three of them have been friends since 5th grade. Jungkook used to tease Taehyung a lot, and Taehyung had been sent to the principal’s office more times than he can remember, because he’d always fight back. Jimin is also at the counselling office, but mainly for moral support. Their relationship changed when Taehyung caught Jungkook feeding a small, helpless kitten at the corner of a convenience store, late after school. Since then, he only saw Jungkook as this soft, vulnerable kid. Then years later, Jungkook admitted that he only took Taehyung’s strawberry snacks because he wanted his attention. He thought Taehyung had the prettiest smile in class. Jungkook doesn’t even like strawberries.
“Still want me to drive past this car or…” Jungkook comments, Jimin hears faintly over the phone. “Bun, Jimin’s ass must be freezing or something.”
Taehyung laughs, and Jimin laughs too. He missed them so much. “All right, all right, you can drive past the bestest boy in the worlddd. We need to protect Jimin’s only good trait.”
“YAH!” Jimin protest. “I have nice lips, too!”
“Ah, yes. THE lips.” Taehyung agrees, “We’re almost there, we’ll see you in a minute!”
Jimin says okay and reminds them to drive safely before hanging up.
Walking towards the exit, Jimin read words in familiar characters, seeing kind faces with familiar features. He didn’t know how much he had missed being back in Korea. Although he makes sure to fly home every year, this time it feels different.
He feels that he had been away for so long. Too long.
“JIMIN-AHHH!!” A loud yell and a big wave welcomed him through a rolled-down window. Taehyung isn’t even out of the car and he’s already running to Jimin with his arms wide. Jimin drops his bags to catch him, and it felt like he had been hit by a large bear. Taehyung is much taller and broader than he is, so Jimin is easily drowning in his hugs. “You’re fucking blonde!!!”
Jimin pressed their bodies tighter, pumped to see his best friend. “And apparently you’ve been working out!?” He says, noticing the changes in Taehyung’s physique.
“I’ve been joining Jungkook in the gym.” He says, untangling themselves from each other, “but only because I’m gatekeeping him from the girls that keeps ogling him.”
“Of course.” Jimin expects nothing less.
Jungkook meets them halfway as they walk back to the car. Jimin gives him a tight hug. “You know, I’m starting to think you only come back for the free booze,” Jimin chuckles and the younger takes the bags from Jimin’s hands, “but welcome home, hyung!”
He’s home. And for the first time since he left, Jimin wants to stay.
Although he lives alone, Taehyung’s apartment is busy. His phone has been ringing but he refuses to pick it up, the TV is open even though no one is watching, his Christmas tree is lit up, with changing lights, at 2:00 pm in the afternoon, there is a big paper bag full of teared-up gift wrappers that he still hasn’t thrown out. Jimin looks around and he sees new photos up on Taehyung’s wall. “You went to Jeju?”
Taehyung is in the kitchen, working on their late lunch. “Yeah. We stayed there for three weeks,” he yells over the sound of his phone. He still hasn’t answered the incoming calls, “never in my life have I eaten so many lobsters in a span of twenty days.”
“Sounds like fun.” Jimin says, sitting in the island, watching Taehyung chop some carrots.
“It also sounds like my wallet, ripping.” Jungkook joins in. He hugs Taehyung from behind and nuzzles on his neck as a form of early apology.
“Yah, you kept telling me to ‘indulge myself’—so I did” Taehyung reasons, with a sly smile on his face. He feels Jungkook’s lips on his shoulder through the fabric of his shirt.
“Mh, yes of course. You deserve every lobster, baby.”
Jimin frowns, wanting to untangle the two with his bare hands. “God, I forgot how disgustingly whipped you guys are.”
“You’re one to talk! Come here, let me see the ring—” Taehyung reaches to see Jimin’s hands, but Jimin quickly hides it.
He isn’t wearing it.
There was this awkward silence after. The three of them not knowing how to address the situation, so Jimin clears his voice. “I didn’t want to lose it on the plane or something.”
“Of course, yes.” Then the two both nods in agreement, awkwardly going back to chopping carrots.
They haven’t really talked about the engagement yet, or Yejun. Jimin just told Taehyung over facetime—and it was honestly shocking given that they’ve only known each other for two years. It is also difficult for Taehyung to decide what to feel about it, because there was once a time where it wasn’t just the three of them waiting for the clock to hit midnight. Once, there was a man that held Jimin’s hands as if it was sculpted by the gods, stared at Jimin’s eyes as if there were stars living in them.
Once, there was a man named Min Yoongi, and he… he put romance to shame.
Taehyung’s phone rings again, with the same caller. “Babe, can you get that? Must be the maintenance—if they ask us to pay before we use the roof deck tell them they can kiss my ass, alright?”
Jungkook picks up the call and gave Taehyung a look. “Yes—” he answers, leaving the room to find a quieter place. “Yes, about that...”
“Bun, not a single cent you hear me?!” he yells and Jimin smiles at it. He missed how loud Taehyung is. “Sooo, Yejun is in Chicago.”
Jimin nods.
“That sucks. I thought I’d finally get to meet him. I mean, I barely know the guy and now he’s marrying the man who I’ve known my whole life.” It’s true. They know everything about each other. “I swear you’ve waxed my ass at least once.”
“Twice. The second time was against every fiber of my being.”
“Right.” Taehyung stops chopping to look Jimin properly, “Look, I’m not saying I want to shave your fiancé’s ass or anything… all I’m saying is—”
“I know, I know.” Jimin heaves, “He says he’ll try.”
Taehyung purses his lips, “Then that’s good enough. If you’re happy, that’s good enough for me.” He decides, going back to his dish. “…you are happy, right?”
Jimin fades at the question. “…of course,” he says.
Taehyung and Jimin are sat on the floor, changed into more comfier clothes. Their backs resting on the frame of the sofa. The fairy lights from Taehyung’s Christmas tree are the only thing that lets Jimin see the features of Taehyung’s face. Jungkook is right, Taehyung had the prettiest smile. Close to finishing a bottle of Merlot, their faces are both red with drunk blush, laughing at almost anything.
“…so, I did what I had to do. I told her that her top was unflattering, and her shoes was very twenty-thirteen.”
“TAEHYUNG, OH MY GOD!” Jimin almost rolls over.
“She’s gonna be a bitch in my shoot and think I’ll let her just because she’s a national sweetheart.” Taehyung mocks the tone of the last words. “I’ve seen people with prettier skin! Yoongi hyung ha—” He stops at the mention of the name. He was trying his best not to bring up Yoongi with Jimin, but wines make his lip loose. “…nevermind.”
Jimin bites his lips, “We can talk about him, Tae. It’s been years. It’ll be childish if we still avoid a conversation of someone that was a huge part of our lives. He’s a friend.”
“Yeah, a friend that I haven’t heard from in three years.” Taehyung says, almost as if he’s hurt that Yoongi didn’t show up in the last three New Years.
“So, he’s not coming this year, too?”
“Nope. Emailed everyone, but not a word from him.”
“Do you think he’s okay?” Taehyung pauses, looking at Jimin. “Tae, I’m asking because I’m worried. I’m his friend, too!”
“He is, probably. Jungkook saw him once, in Graff. He said he looked good! He’s an ass for not texting back, but I was happy when Jungkook said he’s good.”
“Graff…”
Taehyung looks at Jimin again, as if he is reading his expression. “Oh, come on. He could be buying his mom a pair of earrings or something.”
“Or he could be getting married.” Jimin says, “and that’s fine. That’s good.”
They let a silence air out until Taehyung points the obvious. Whatever happens, he’ll blame it on the wine.
“You know, for someone who used to go out wearing all of his rings in one go, you’re awfully obvious at leaving one in the jewelry box.”
Jimin looks at his bare fingers. He feels guilty, but he knows if there is one person that he could be truly honest to, it’s Taehyung.
“I don’t know why I feel this way. I love him, I do, but— I don’t know… I feel like I’m…” Jimin doesn’t know how to say it without feeling bad. “He proposed to me, but I couldn’t say anything. I couldn’t say yes.”
“What?”
“He didn’t want to pressure me, so he gave me the ring. I wear it whenever I feel like it. Getting used to it. He told me he’d give me time to think and I… don’t know why it’s so hard for me to say it. I love him.”
Taehyung pours Jimin another glass of Merlot, “I can’t know for sure, because I haven’t been in your situation, but maybe that feeling is normal? I mean, marriage is a big thing.”
Jimin only listens.
“But can I be totally honest with you?” Jimin nods, so Taehyung continues, “Do you remember the first thing you told me about Yoongi?”
Jimin laughs into his wine because he does.
“You were running from your car to the dorm, and you were carrying—what was it…boxes?”
“Boxes, yeah. I was unpacking.”
“Mh, and then there was this broad guy behind you, carrying even more boxes. It towers over him.”
Yes, Jimin remembers everything.
Jet black hair, white t-shirt and a flannel wrapped around his waist.
“He dropped your things in-front of me and Jungkook. Poor guy had lake of sweat forming on his back from helping you unload your things from your car.” Taehyung had a smile on his face reminiscing. “When he left, I asked you who he was, do you remember what you said?”
Jimin pauses, gulping his words. “…my future husband.”
Taehyung snickers a laugh, “Yeah—father of your kids and shit. But of course, we knew you were joking. You just met.” He explains, reliving the moment in his head, “Then months later, when you guys started dating for real—what was it, about two months? Three? We were drunk as fuck. Just the two of us, like right now. Do you remember what you said?”
The room is quiet.
“Taehyung-ah, I’m scared. That’s what you said. You were crying like you were in middle school and you told me, this guy… this guy feels like forever.” There was a pause. They both take a sip from their glass, swallowing the sweet and bitter taste of wine. “That was the first real thing you said about hyung.”
“And we both know how that ends.”
Taehyung nods, pursing his lips. “Right.”
“What we had was good… but that’s over now. I haven’t heard from him in three years, too, Taehyung. I’m pretty sure what I’m feeling regarding this engagement doesn’t have anything to do with him.”
Taehyung’s phone lights up and he checks the notification. “Are you sure?”
“…why?”
“Because Yoongi hyung just rsvp’d for Friday.” Taehyung announces, “He’s coming.”
Now, Jimin’s heart shouldn’t be beating like this. Fast and unpredictable.
But Jimin’s life had nothing but fast and unpredictable. One day, he’s in their small apartment, dancing at the sound of Yoongi’s piano, then the next, he’s in New York, being one of the highest paid ballets in the city, engaged to a corporate heir.
“That’s okay, right?” Taehyung asks, pulling back Jimin from a zone. “It won’t be uncomfortable for you?”
“No.” He tells Taehyung, “I’ve moved on, so Yoongi must be, too.” Jimin says, convincing himself.
***
Taehyung is a social butterfly. He can walk down the streets of Myeondong and bump into at least three friendly faces. He’s a freelance photographer and has worked with different kinds of people, so his social skills only get better every year.
Now, his apartment is crowded. He sent the New Year’s invitation to his contacts, but he wasn’t expecting everyone to show up. It’s fun regardless. Some are on the roof-deck, and some are on Taehyung’s balcony. Jimin is making new friends and catching up with some people he knew from high school.
Tonight, Jimin wore his ring. It softly glitters, matching his Balmain ripped sequin jacket over a roll neck sweater. He styled his hair neatly and wore a necklace with a flower charm pendant. Jimin spoke to everyone and helped Taehyung and Jungkook accommodate guests. The drinks kept rolling and everyone acted as they knew everyone else. It’s a good party.
Jimin is sitting on the island, a glass of white wine on his hand, talking to Da-bin, an old friend from comm class. She’s telling him that she’s now working from a big broadcasting agency but kept telling Jimin how lucky he is that he’s now dancing in New York. Living his dream.
“I should’ve just dropped everything, too! Auggh, I should’ve followed my guts and applied to LA when I had the chance.” She says, picking on some brie tarts that Taehyung prepared.
If he’s being honest, Jimin doesn’t like being reminded that he did, in-fact, dropped everything. It sounds like a brave thing to do. The way people say it, they always make it sound so simple. Liberating, even. But for Jimin, dropping everything and moving to New York was the most painful thing he’d ever have to do.
Leaving the love of his life. It felt so cruel.
Jimin forces a smile.
His attention is mostly at the door. Every time someone comes in, he instinctively twists his head sideways, checking who it was. Every time Taehyung yells ‘Hyung’, his heart races a beat. No one is denying it. Jimin misses Yoongi. He wants to know if he’s doing okay. He wants to know how he is, or what is going on in his life. He is not denying that every time someone crosses the door, he wonders if it’s finally the face that he’s most familiar with.
“HYUNG!!” Taehyung yells. “Goddamn— It’s really you!”
Jimin is at the balcony, yet he heard Taehyung’s voice. He instantly knew it was him. Yoongi.
He sneaks a peek between the gaps of the glass door, through the curtains, and there he sees Yoongi, tucked in Jungkook’s embrace. He still has dark hair, wearing a buttoned-down Saint Laurent shirt covered by a motorcycle jacket, black pants that has a small statement cut around the knee and a pair of Celine zipped boot. He wore minimal accessories. Just a few rings and a necklace. He looked good. His features are still soft and kind, just like they were years ago.
Yoongi saw Jimin and he smiled, acknowledging him. Jimin smiled back, but Yoongi’s attention turns back to Jungkook and Taehyung. Jimin can’t hear what they’re talking about, but Taehyung is laughing. He’s good Jimin thinks. He’s okay.
He didn’t leave his spot at the balcony. He’s at the corner, staring at the skyline. Taehyung got the best view in Seoul, Jimin thought. The noise is muffled here, and no-one is coming up to him for small talks. He’s tired of meaningless conversation about what’s trending or a drama between people he doesn’t even give a shit about.
“You’re blonde.” Jimin hears a voice he missed. Yoongi leans at the rail, next to Jimin. He’s holding two bottles of beer, handing one to Jimin. “Need a drink, or are you on time-out?”
“Tae’s too busy to put me on time-out, so I’m taking this.” Jimin grabs the bottle, looking at Yoongi’s eyes, before gazing back at the view. “I’m glad Taehyung moved here. This place is prettier than last year.”
Yoongi can’t say anything. He wasn’t there.
Jimin looks at him again, “I’m glad you could come this time.”
This time, Yoongi is the one to peel his gaze from Jimin. He looks at the skyline, too. It’s true. The view is beautiful. Awfully freezing, but beautiful. “I was afraid Taehyung will conduct a search and rescue operation if I missed another year.”
Jimin laughs at this.
“How are you? What have you been up to?” Jimin asks.
If it were another person, Jimin will just consider this just another meaningless talk. Something to pass the time. But not with Yoongi. Jimin could listen to him for hours, talking about anything, and he’d find everything interesting. He wants to know all of it. He still wants to be part of Yoongi’s life, even if it’s just this.
“Nothing much.” Yoongi says, taking a sip from the bottle. “Mostly in the studio with Seok.”
“Studio…”
“It’s not big or anything… it’s still a work in progress.” Yoongi explains, “Jin hyung does all the business deals. He’s crankier than ever.” He snickers a laugh, and Jimin smiles echoing him, “I’m just… working on music.”
“That’s great, Yoongi.” Jimin tells him. “I’m proud of you. You and Hoseok hyung. You’ve come so far! Not everyone can say they’re doing what they like to do, and you… you’re doing the thing you love the most. It’s good.”
There was once a promise that Jimin will be there for Yoongi every step of the way. To support him. That’s gone now, but his genuine happiness for him never swayed.
“Thank you.” Yoongi smiled, “How ‘bout you? What’s going on with you?”
The obvious answer is that he’s engaged. People who get engaged can’t stop talking about how their partner proposed or how many diamonds are glued in their ring. But that wasn’t the first thing that crossed Jimin’s mind. “I’ve been preparing for a show in March. There’s only one lead dancer and it’s a big role. I’m hoping they’d consider me.”
“It’s their loss if they don’t.” Yoongi answers easily.
It shouldn’t, but Jimin felt a hit on his heart. Beating fast and slow, erratic, and calm—all at the same time.
“That’s what I keep telling them.” Jimin managed to say.
Yoongi takes another sip, then he removes his elbow from the rails, straighten his back and faced Jimin. Jimin does the same, facing Yoongi. His hands, still holding on to the cold steel.
“It looks good on you.” Yoongi says, looking at the shiny band on Jimin’s finger. “I’m happy for you, Jimin-ah.”
Jimin almost fell silent. His heart feels this suffocating pressure that he can’t explain, as if someone is replacing the oxygen in his lungs with a thousand burning needles. Still, he managed a smile, “Thank you.”
Then seeing him fully, Jimin notices that Yoongi had a ring in his necklace, locked as a pendant. It’s not a fashion piece, no. Yoongi had a few on his fingers, but this one was different. This one was meant as a promise. An engagement ring. Then he remembers Jungkook saying he saw Yoongi at Graff, a jewelry shop— it only comes easily for Jimin to realize.
“That…” Jimin points at the charm on Yoongi’s necklace, “…are you engaged, too?”
Yoongi pieced what Jimin was referring to, holding the ring on his chain. “Ah… no.” He says, then he swallows, “I haven’t asked yet.”
Oh.
It shouldn’t, but Jimin’s heart sank. He should be happy that Yoongi has someone. He should be happy that Yoongi is okay and have moved on, like he expected.
Jimin should be happy, so why isn’t he?
Yoongi leans in, giving Jimin a hug. It was quick, yet so familiar. Yoongi held Jimin tightly for a few greedy seconds because anything more than that might turn into a maybe-we-could-still-work seconds of hope.
Jimin slowed that few seconds of him being pressed to Yoongi’s chest. He slowed it down as much as he could. Yoongi still haven’t changed the cologne that he wears. Yoongi still puts his right hand at the small of Jimin’s back whenever he pulls him for a hug, just like he did years ago. Yoongi’s heart still beats slow, like it did when Jimin used to rest his head on his chest during a lazy Sunday.
It’s funny how nothing changed and yet everything did.
When Yoongi pulls away, he says “I’m glad I came, too.” He smiled and stepped back in the apartment, leaving Jimin in the balcony, “It was good seeing you! Happy new year, Jimin.”
Yoongi left just before everyone started yelling numbers. Counting down ‘til midnight. Ten! Nine! Eight!
Jimin stares at the ring around his finger, shining so prettily. He wonders why he couldn’t say yes. Seven! Six! Five! Four!
Jimin’s phone rings, three seconds ‘til the clock hits twelve, Yejun’s name on his screen.
“Hey,” Jimin answers.
“Happy new year, my love.”
There is a word for the unfair pain of loving someone that wasn’t meant for you.
Cruel.