Chapter Text
Ik-sun mixed her dark-colored noodles with her chopsticks. "There's a great ganjjajang place near the base. They give you two fried eggs."
"I heard you but I can't go." Ik-jun was apologetic. It was clear by how he avoided her eyes. "Sorry. Even Inje was far. I don't have time to go to Changwon."
Ik-sun persisted, hoping the mention of their parents and a free meal would sway her only sibling. "Our parents live in Changwon. Let's take mom and dad there. Ganjjajang is on me."
Rationally, she understood the time commitment she was asking for. But she couldn't help but miss her brother's company-- although she'd rather die than ever admit it. Ik-sun hoped her typical tone of perpetual irritation would mask the hurt and disappointment she felt at Ik-jun's rejection.
Once Ik-sun sprinted past the gate enclosing her base, the unimaginable sight before her filled her with genuine surprise. "Don't tell me you're here to see me."
"No I'm not. I'm here for jjajangmyeon." At the sound of Jun-wan's deep voice, an intense sense of deja vu overcame Ik-sun. "For ganjjajang."
Ik-sun felt a complicated slew of conflicting emotions coursing through her body-- heartache, relief, and now hope. With these words, her last wall finally crumbled. As her lips quivered, she resolved that she would no longer hold her true feelings hostage in the heavily guarded fortress she built to protect her heart.
With her face comfortably nestled in the crook of his neck and her arms pressed against his back, Ik-sun felt euphoric as she breathed in Jun-wan's familiar scent. Finally.
When was the last time she felt his arms fold her into an embrace? It was definitely before she left Korea. But not at the airport since his surgery ran long. Tears fell even harder at the frustration at the failure to claim the lost memory.
Things will be different this time.
A mischievous look appeared on U-ju's face. "Imo let's pretend to be monkeys!"
"Monkeys? Hmm should we swish our tails? Wait, do we even have tails long enough to swish? I think I need to know what kind of monkey we're pretending to be." Amid all of her questioning, Song-hwa did her best primate impression complete with high-pitched sounds and knuckle-walking.
U-ju followed suit, naturally assuming the neurosurgeon probably knew as much about monkeys as she knew about cicadas. He stopped suddenly, pulled on her shirt, and gestured towards the playground equipment.
"Ahh monkeys on the monkey bars, huh? Not sure I remember how to do this. Well, here we go." Song-hwa grabbed onto the metal bar and initially struggled to swing but somehow managed to make it across to the other side. Her victory dance was abruptly cut short. "Yah! Lee Ik-jun, who said you could record this?!?"
Ik-jun was engrossed in his phone and couldn't be bothered to look up. "Sorry Chae Song-hwa, can you repeat that? I was busy uploading a video to the neurosurgery group chat."
"Yah! I swear I'm going to-"
Song-hwa's threat of violence was interrupted by U-ju crying out. The image of U-ju on the the ground made her heart clench. The two adults raced to the injured child but Song-hwa reached him first. "You're okay, aren't you U-ju-ya?"
U-ju whimpered as he held up his scraped palm. "I got an ouchy, imo."
Song-hwa gently blew on his tiny hand as she held it in hers. "In my professional medical opinion, you won't need stitches but we should clean it and put on a bandaid. Do you want a second opinion from your appa?"
U-ju shook his head. "I know you can fix me, imo." Ik-jun fought back a smile at his son's words as he handed Song-hwa an alcohol wipe, ointment, and a Pororo bandaid from a travel sized first aid kit.
Once U-ju's injury was treated, he hugged Song-hwa tight. "Thanks imo. Let's go on the slides next!"
"That little boy of yours is fearless, just like his appa." Song-hwa brain immediately conjured up the memories of Ik-jun's countless confessions. Her smile was replaced by an anxious look as she propelled herself down the narrow, twisting yellow tube.
Ik-jun stood at the bottom of the slide in order to help his girlfriend up. "Looks like you're burning a lot of calories today. You're going to order an obscene amount of food, aren't you?"
Song-hwa smirked. Ik-jun knew her so well. "Don't I always? Don't worry. U-ju will help, won't you U-ju?"
U-ju's face lit up at the mention of food. "Can we eat jjajangmyeon?"
Song-hwa gathered U-ju's water bottle, hat, and hoodie then U-ju placed her hand in U-ju's as the pair started towards the parking lot. "I heard your appa prefers ganjajjang but he only eats it in Changwon. Hmm, we should probably get gas and some snacks before we head out, right?"
Ik-jun looked dumbfounded as he reached for Song-hwa's forgotten coat and purse. "We're driving how many hours for noodles?"
"Mmm, do you remember our first day together?" Song-hwa's voice was soft and nostalgic.
Ik-jun looked through the windshield at the clear bluebird day a stark contrast to the stormy night when they finally crossed the 22-year-old line. "Honestly no. We were together for like 3 days straight and I'm not even counting band practice. Wasn't it in the first 24 hours that you pilfered my favorite hoodie?"
Song-hwa pouted even though she knew Ik-jun was unlikely to ask for it back. "It looks better on me. Anyway, we were in bed and--"
Like a reflex, the word "bed" caused an arrogant smirk to appear on Ik-jun's face. In actuality, when Ik-jun looked back on that night he couldn't help but remember how beautiful Song-hwa looked even with her sweaty and unkempt hair.
"You are such a child! How can you have a child?" Song-hwa's face flushed in embarrassment as she lightly smacked his arm.
"Shh! You're going to wake U-ju!" He hissed in a loud whisper.
Song-hwa turned to confirm that their bickering had not disturbed the sleeping child. She then lowered her voice and continued her thought. "Anyway, that night I asked you to tell me something you've never told anyone before. You said you've never trusted anyone beside yourself."
He nodded.
"There was something I wanted to ask but couldn't because you fell asleep."
"Song-hwa, you know you can ask me anything."
"Do you trust me?
Ik-jun interlocked his fingers with hers as he kept his eyes trained on the road. "Of course I do, Song-hwaya. I just... I know that it's complicated with me being divorced and a single father. I don't ever want to burden you."
"Lee Ik-jun, do you know why it took me so long to confess my feelings even after I knew how I felt about you? I was trying to work up the courage... to risk it all. I'm fully invested now. I'm all in. Your burdens are my burdens. So share them with me, Ik-junah. Trust me fully."
"Oh it really does come with two fried eggs!" A giddy Song-hwa marveled at the newfound discovery as she slurped her black bean noodles.
"You like eggs right, U-ju-ya? Your appa told me how you used to order multiple sandwiches from Eggdrop!" At the mention of the sandwich shop, U-ju began reciting the menu from memory.
Ik-sun sulkily mixed her noodles. "Why does everyone suddenly want to eat ganjjajang? I thought Changwon was too far."
Ik-jun threw up his hands dramatically. "You invited me, told me to bring mom and dad, and that you would pay! I'm here as you requested so why aren't you happy?"
Ik-sun honestly didn't know why she was so upset. Maybe it was the sting of Ik-jun's initial rejection. Or maybe it was because she felt like Ik-jun was likely only there because of U-ju or Song-hwa. She gave the two side eye as she watched them furiously slurp their noodles. "By the way, I said nothing about paying for these two. You know how much these food goblins can eat!"
"You always tell me how you like them so much more than me!" Ik-jun's words came out louder and harsher than he intended.
"Enough! No more bickering you two!" After being chastised, the siblings slurped their noodles quietly.
Mama Lee's tone softened as she turned her attention to the woman between her son and grandson. "Song-hwaya, when was the last time we saw each other? U-ju's dol? U-juya, I can't believe you picked a stethoscope! Well, I guess there were three of them! Anyway, it's been too long, Song-hwa! Come to Changwon more often. You are welcome with or without Ik-jun." Mama Lee's heart melted as she watched Song-hwa carefully wipe black bean sauce off of U-ju's face.
The older woman motioned to the waitress who went to the kitchen and returned with a bowl. Song-hwa looked confused. "I didn't order this."
"I'm sure you noticed that ganjjajang is not as saucy as jjajangmyeon. If you eat it with jjampong, it, will cut the richness. Daikon helps too." Mama Lee slid the plate of yellow radish towards Song-hwa.
Ik-jun's mom gestured towards her grandson. "U-juya, come over here and show halmeoni photos from your latest camping adventures with Mone so imo can eat with two hands."
Today's feast was a welcome surprise after an exceptionally busy day at the hospital where Song-hwa only managed to eat instant and prepared convenience store food.
As she dug into the reddish-orange seafood soup, Song-hwa smiled brightly, her heart full for being treated so affectionately by the Lee family.
Song-hwa quietly closed the door to Ik-jun's childhood bedroom.
"Is U-ju asleep?" Ik-jun asked from the kitchen.
Song-hwa nodded. "He is such a ball of energy. He fell asleep so quickly. His little body must desperately need to recharge."
Ik-jun's mom examined the tea canister on the counter. "Thank you for this tea, Song-hwaya. I've never tried ginseng oolong before. Let's have it together." Ik-jun filled the chipped teapot with boiling water, as he waited for the tea to steep.
She called for her husband. "Yeobo, move U-ju to Ik-sun's old room. Be careful to keep him asleep."
The senior woman deftly sliced the stone fruit as her words were now directed at the surgeons. "Ik-jun's room is too cramped for the 3 of you. We are not so old fashioned. You two are adults."
Song-hwa and Ik-jun exchanged looks of uncertainty. Neither knew what to say.
"Ik-junah, you've talked about Song-hwa with such affection. I just knew. Call it mother's intuition." She handed the plate of cut peaches to her son to place on the table then continued. "Song-hwaya, we adore you. Moreso now as we watch you dote on our Uju but..." Mama Lee paused thoughtfully.
Ik-jun placed mugs of brewed teas in front of his mom and girlfriend. He eyed his mother's troubled expression. "Just say it."
"Are you two planning to get married?"
"Eomma, we've only been dating for--"
"Should we?" Song-hwa interrupted as her fingers fidgeted with the rounded handle of the mug.
Ik-jun's mother gently placed her hand on top of Song-hwa's. "I don't know where your parents stand on the matter, Song-hwa, especially since Ik-jun is divorced but as far as we are concerned, this decision is all yours. I can see how comfortable you two already are so the choice concerning marriage is really just about how you two want to define U-ju's relationship with Song-hwa."
"Sorry I'm back later than planned." Jun-wan glanced at his watch before taking it off. "I kept saying 'last drink' but my shot glass would magically refill. It'd probably be better if you met my alcoholic family during the day."
Ik-sun looked up from her book as she planted a chaste kiss on Jun-wan's cheek. "Why during the day?"
"I wouldn't want you to feel uncomfortable as the only sober person in the room. I'm sure you'll also find my family more pleasant that way." Jun-wan slid into bed beside her.
Ik-sun put her head on his shoulder. "Just because I can't drink alcohol doesn't mean I expect others to do the same. Don't worry, oppa. I am very careful about my liver and putting my health first. Eomma and Ik-jun oppa nag me nonstop about it."
"Speaking of Ik-junah, we need to be honest with him this time around. I don't know exactly what I was so worried about the first time around. But knowing his role in bringing us back together, I want to do right by him this time."
Ik-sun nodded silently.
Jun-wan took Ik-sun's hand in his. "For things to work, we both need to be honest even if our words inflict pain. Promise?" He held up a hopeful pinky.
She smirked. "I'm not the only one who lies, avoids, and obscures in this relationship. Being honest will be just as hard for you as it will be for me. But what choice do I really have? I'm not letting you go again." Despite her words, Ik-sun gladly linked her pinky with his before tilting her head up and pulling Jun-wan into an intimate kiss.
Ik-jun spread the sheet over the mattress and tucked in one side while he watched Song-hwa neatly arrange the other. "I can't believe we woke up in Seoul and we're going to bed in Changwon-- in my childhood bedroom no less." His face looked mischievous. "You know Chae Song-hwa, you're the first girl that I'm sharing this bed with."
Song-hwa looked miffed as she fluffed the pillow a little too excessively. "Are we in an alternate universe where I suddenly forget that I've had to watch you flirt, date, and marry?"
Ik-jun walked around the bed and urged his girlfriend to sit beside him. "I'm sorry for what I put you through." He gently caressed her face in a way that made her knees weak. "From now until eternity, you are the only person I will ever want to flirt with, date, or marry." His words were laced with sincerity as he softly kissed her lips.
As she pulled back from the kiss she punched him in the arm. "Why are you so damn charismatic? Ugh my brain should seriously know better than to fall for your moves or feel any kind of fluttering!"
Ik-jun looked smug. "I made your heart flutter, did I?" He quickly grabbed the pillows preemptively before Song-hwa could throw them at him. "Song-hwaya, I really meant what I said. I'm not playing games or trying to manipulate you. I'm just me, a guy who is absolutely smitten with you even when you lose your temper and inflict violence on me."
Song-hwa knew his words to be true. "I swear my own mom likes you more than she likes me. When I told her I wanted to bring you and U-ju to dinner, her voice raised by an octave and she started talking really fast."
"Of course she loves me. How can anyone hate me?" Song-hwa rolled her eyes even though she felt like it was a pretty true statement.
Ik-jun's expression turned suddenly serious. "Dinner with your parents isn't a coincidence, is it? This is because of what my mom said?"
Song-hwa shrugged in a non-committal way. "It took us so long to get together, Ik-junah. I have zero plans to ever be without you again. So your mom is right. U-ju and I will need to figure out what kind of relationship we both want. Whether or not we are legally related, U-ju will form relationships with my family as well. With my mom's diagnosis I don't know how many good years she has left. I want U-ju to have good memories of her while she still has body control and mobility."
"How does your mom feel about meeting U-ju?" Ik-jun couldn't help but feel protective over his son and want to shield him from the pitiful looks and unkind words that he may encounter from having a single parent.
"U-ju is your mini me. I'm sure she will adore him just as much as she adores you."
"And I'm sure U-ju will love her. You know how much that inssa craves attention." Ik-jun stroked Song-hwa's arm reassuringly as her heart warmed at the thought of U-ju making her mom laugh. "But really, there's no rush. It doesn't need to be next weekend."
Song-hwa shook her head. "Too late. My mom already started menu planning based on your favorites. I assume U-ju will be happy eating jjajangmyeon and hamburgers?"
If Mama Lee was surprised to see Ik-jun's childhood best friend show up at the door with her daughter, she didn't show it. "Good morning, Jun-wan. How are your parents?"
"Good morning, eomeoni. My parents asked if they could interest you in a trade-- your prized persimmons for their chili peppers?" He held up an overflowing paper bag.
"How can I say no to that offer?" She gladly accepted the bag. "Jun-wanie, if you want caffeine, help yourself. There's also chocolate milk in the fridge but I just ask that you leave one for U-ju." Jun-wan excused himself for the restroom while Ik-sun followed her mom to the kitchen in order to finish making breakfast.
As Jun-wan walked down the familiar halfway towards the kitchen, he lingered outside of Ik-jun's bedroom. He recalled all of the times he fell asleep studying and how he could never get his wrist to bend like Ik-jun's when they were learning how to play the guitar.
Jun-wan pushed the door open to see Ik-jun sprawled on the bed, his back bare. "Ik-junah, I'm hungry! Hurry up and get dressed!" He picked up Ik-jun's white shirt off of the floor and threw it at him.
Ik-jun stirred. Satisfied, Jun-wan prepared to close the door when his eyes landed on a petite hand peeking out of the blanket. His dramatic shriek caused the body beneath the blanket to move.
Jun-wan slowly inched closer, his curiosity in overdrive. "It can't be right, Ik-jun? Don't tell me it's..."
Song-hwa's irritated face appeared. "Ya! Why are you being like this?" She pointed towards his alarmed face.
"Song-hwa!"
"Stop screaming! Look I'm fully dressed! There's nothing scandalous that should warrant that horror movie scream." She gestured towards the black tee and gray sweats.
"But those are Ik-jun's clothes! And he's shirtless!"
Ik-jun remedied the last part by throwing his shirt on. "Yah! Sleeping next to Song-hwa is like sleeping next to a furnace."
Jun-wan was horrified at how comfortable his two best friends looked in bed together. "For the sake of our friendship please stop talking!"
Ik-jun grabbed Song-hwa's glasses from the nightstand. He was so preoccupied with cleaning the lenses on his shirt that he didn't notice something fall to the floor.
"Is that your bra?!?" Jun-wan cringed.
"Yah Kim Jun-wan, I've pretended to like enough of your girlfriends to know this isn't the first bra you've seen. Enough! I was upfront and told you a month ago that Ik-jun and I were dating. If you didn't believe me that's on you. Get out and start thinking of an apology I will accept!" Song-hwa shoved him out of the room and slammed the door.
On the other side of the closed door, Ik-jun looked suspiciously at Jun-wan with a raised eyebrow. "What time did you leave Seoul in order to be in Changwon in time for breakfast?"
Luckily Jun-wan was saved from answering by Mama Lee's presence. "Are you surgeons done making a scene? You are lucky I had U-ju's harabeoji take him outside to pick persimmons! There's too much commotion in here. Jun-wan, they're adults. If I'm fine with them sharing a bed, you should find a way to be fine, too. Thanks in advance for helping me get breakfast ready while Song-hwa showers."
"Did U-ju even ask for these baked goods?" Ik-sun asked as she re-read her mom's text.
Her brother shrugged as he rhythmically tapped the steering wheel to the beat of the music. "Who knows? You know this is just how eomma deals with conflict. She sends us on unnecessary errands."
"Ik-junah?" Ik-sun's voice was meek and hesitant.
"Hmm?"
She spoke quickly, pushing the words out before she lost her nerve. "Why did you stop coming to Changwon?"
Ik-jun's face expressed genuine confusion. "What are you talking about? I recently spent two weeks here with U-ju."
Ik-sun sighed as her tone grew combative. "That doesn't count! That was after your hospitalization!"
"How can it not count when I was physically in Changwon?"
Ik-sun looked out the passenger side window. "Nevermind." She muttered under her breath.
Now it was Ik-jun's turn to sigh. "Yah, are you upset that I stopped treating you to meals here? I still buy you food when you visit me in Seoul!"
Maybe it was PTSD from his marriage but Ik-jun often found silence stifling. He could feel that there was tension in the air with his sister but he didn't know the cause so he had no idea how to fix things.
After what felt like an eternity, Ik-sun spoke. "I get it. You're dating unnie now so you don't have time to come see me in Changwon." This was Ik-sun's attempt to set aside her own feelings and try to be mature.
Ik-jun pulled the car to the side of the road and turned off the engine. "Is that really what you think? Ik-sunie, I would never let my relationship status impact how I treat you as your oppa." He hesitated momentarily before divulging the truth. "I stopped coming to Changwon because I wanted you to come to Seoul."
Ik-sun sneered. "Wow. It's because you can't be bothered to drive 4 hours each way? You know that's the same amount of time I spend on the bus, right?"
Ik-jun looked Ik-sun in the eye so that she would actually listen to his words. "It's because Jun-wan is in Seoul."
Shock engulfed Ik-sun as Ik-jun's words left her utterly speechless.
"I figured if I limited my time in Changwon you'd be more inclined to come to Seoul and it would increase your chances to see Jun-wan. It was painfully obvious why neither of you moved on. The fact that he's in Changwon now tells me that Jun-wan was the one who put his pride aside first."
Tears welled up in Ik-sun's eyes from being so moved by her brother's thoughtfulness. "Oppa..."
Ik-jun glanced away sheepishly. "I know I haven't always been there for you but I've really tried to change that recently. Ik-sunah, you are one of the most important people in my life. As long as I'm your oppa I will never stop caring about your health or your happiness. Dating Song-hwa isn't going to change that."
Before she could stop herself, Ik-sun put her head on her brother's shoulder in an uncharacteristic sign of affection. Ik-jun in turn slung his arm around her as the two siblings wordlessly appreciated the depth of their love for one another.