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The funerals were always the same. Even when they were different, the differences were the same. One of a veritable brood of children, Abner had seen... probably more of his siblings die than he wanted to. Some of them had died right in front of him, as a result of their mother's experimentation, and others had died a country away, having left as quickly as they could. Some of them died before Abner was even born.
It felt sometimes like death followed them, lurked around corners for the Krill children to drop their guard just long enough to seize them by the throat and drag them away. But it'd never taken Abner. Even when he debated letting his virus eat him alive, imagined the way his body would explode, filled with the colorful dots that he'd... named himself after, he never did it. He never really let it consume him, even when things felt bleak, and he was so tired.
His siblings hadn't wanted to die. Not when he'd seen them. They'd been afraid, and crying, and in so much pain. But they hadn't wanted to die. Just to be... at peace, maybe.
So as he stood there, on a bright sunny day in a dark outfit (he didn't own a suit, he didn't need one, usually) as they lowered his sister's body into the ground... he hoped she was at peace, at least. He kept his eyes downcast, didn't want to see anyone else, didn't want to talk. Definitely didn't want to meet the people in her life, people who didn't know about their family, or maybe worse, those that did.
Abner had seen so much violent death in his life, maybe it was nicer this way, to see the aftermath, the final resting place of her body, and know that she'd stay there. Nothing else could happen to her.
He left when people were exchanging pleasantries, sympathies. He should've told someone he was sorry for their loss. Instead he went home and cried, and cried, and cried, and tried so very hard not to think about when it'd be his turn.