Work Text:
Blocked.
Blocked.
Blocked.
Every time the ball bounced back over the net or over the heads of the opposing team, (Y/N)’s vision went a little more red. What good was he if he couldn’t break through a block.
It’s not like he could serve, or even receive. Hell, he was too slow to effectively block most of the time. All (Y/N) had was his strength. The strength to break through any team's blocks and slam the ball straight to the floor. Itachiyama Institute’s volleyball team was filled with well rounded players, and here he was, shaking and panting on the court watching the ball fly back over the net towards him.
He couldn’t move fast enough. By the time his arms were up to receive the ball had already hit the floor and the whistle calling for a substitution from his coach rang. He could feel his team mates eyes on him as he moved off the court, eyes on the floor as he grabbed the card from his substitute.
“Take a break and cool down, we still have a large lead so don’t be too worried.” He nodded, still looking down at the floor, moving to the line of players.
The bus ride back was loud, Itachyama had won despite the small hiccup. (Y/N) sat near the back, tucked into himself, stewing in his own anger and what ifs. His team mates deserved to celebrate their victory, but (Y/N) needed to get better. Train until he couldn’t so that for once he wasn’t dragging everyone down.
And once the bus pulled into the school parking lot, that’s exactly what he did. Getting the gym key from Iizuna, (Y/N) set up by himself.
He spent an hour serving before his shoulder started to ache. Just trying to get a regular toss serve over the net. That’s all he wanted. Why couldn’t he just-
“Why are you still here.” The sudden voice made them jolt, botching their already doomed serve sending it into the floor in front of them. “It’s late and that was a hard game. For everyone. Rest is important.”
Kiyoomi Sakusa stood before him, in the same tacky, highlighter colored gym clothes, mask covering the lower part of his face.
“It’s none of your business.” (Y/N) stepped forward, grabbing the ball off the floor.
“You’re my team mate, your performance is my business and if you don’t get the proper amount of sleep it will affect your performance. We still have practice tomorrow in case you forgot.”
“I didn’t forget.” (Y/N) snarled back. “And don’t act like you’ve never practiced on your own.”
“I don’t practice after games.” The matter of factness in his voice was cutting (Y/N)’s fuse even shorter than it had been. “It’s important to let your body heal-”
“Just shut up, would you? I didn’t ask for your fucking opinion on my training!” (Y/N) threw the volleyball at his chest, catching him off guard. “None of you get it! If I can’t hit the ball straight through then why am I even here! Why have I spent years working my ass off for a sport I can barely play!” (Y/N) dropped his head, panting heavily.
“I don’t have good technique like everyone else. I’m too far behind to worry about fixing my technique now, but…” (Y/N) sniffled, twisting his hand into his shirt before finally looking Kiyoomi dead in the eyes, tears streaming down his face. “I’ll break through! Whatever it takes!”
(Y/N) let out a shuddering sob before collapsing to his knees, haunching over, forehead inches above the floor, arm pinched between his chest and legs.
“It doesn’t matter how much it hurts. I need to get stronger. To break through. Because if I can’t…” His hand twisted tighter in his shirt, nails digging into the skin beneath it. “What good am I to the team? Why am I here?” He started to shake and his voice wavered as he lost his volume. “I can’t let myself be a dead weight to the team.” A sob racked through his body as he collapsed fully onto the ground, face pressed against the hard floor. “I can’t.”
The last words were barely more than a whimper, so quiet that Kiyoomi almost lost them between all the sobs. Kiyoomi didn’t know what to do, but he knew he needed to do something when he saw (Y/N) grab a fistful of his own hair and pull. Kiyoomi took a hesitant step forward, crouching down by (Y/N)’s head.
“You still need to take care of yourself.” Kiyoomi put a hesitant hand over the one that (Y/N) was still pulling at his hair with. “You can’t play if you hurt yourself trying to push past your limits.” He gently untangled (Y/N)’s fingers from his hair, stopping the pulling. (Y/N) pushed himself up, shocked at just how close Kiyoomi was to him. A hand brushed away the tears from his eyes and (Y/N) had to stop himself from flinching away. “You’re important to the team… And to me. I don’t like seeing you hurt like this.”
(Y/N)’s eyes widened at that. Kiyoomi had never given him any reason to think he liked him, sure he wasn’t very friendly but he never was with anyone other than Motoya. And now Kiyoomi was comforting him on the floor of the empty gym, telling him that he was important?
“I don’t need your pity!” (Y/N) slapped his hand away and scrambled back. “Stop trying to make me feel better by lying to me!” Now Kiyoomi was shocked.
“Why would I lie!” He shot back.
“I don’t know? You tell me.” (Y/N) scrubbed his face with the back of his hand. “I’m not some stupid pet for you to play with.” (Y/N) panted, more tears welling in his eyes, now clutching his still aching shoulder.
“If you don’t want to believe me then fine! Just go home and rest. I’ll clean up here.” Kiyoomi got up without another word and started collecting the volleyballs that littered the court. (Y/N) jumped to his feet in shock.
“No! This is my mess! You go home!” Their eyes met, Kiyoomi’s calm and (Y/N)’s still teary.
“You can help if you want, but I’ve already made up my mind.” He turned back to the ball he was just about to pick up before their outburst, adjusting his mask while he bent down to get it, making (Y/N) pout and muttering a “whatever” before moving to help clean.
“Did you mean it? That I was important to you?” They both stopped at (Y/N)’s question. He still refused to make eye contact, focusing on the volleyball in his hands. “‘Cause it’d be kinda fucked if you didn’t.”
“When have I ever said something I don’t mean?” Kiyoomi stated back, walking back towards (Y/N).
“How am I supposed to know, it’s not like we talk, like, ever.” It was now Kiyoomi’s turn to flush in embarrassment.
“Well, I-” (Y/N) watched him sputter and blush behind his mask out of the corner of his eyes. “I don’t say stuff I don’t mean!” Kiyoomi stamps his foot to emphasize his point. Kiyoomi tucked his chin into the collar of his jacket, blushing deeper when he noticed (Y/N) watching him.
“Sorry, guess ‘m just not used to stuff like this.” (Y/N) said, pursing his lips, before stifling a yawn.
He started taking down the net, lifting the pole from the ground and carrying it to the supply closet. After he sat by the door, rooting through his bag for his other shoes, watching Kiyoomi hover a few feet away.
“If you wanted help practicing you could have asked. In fact I’d be happy to help you improve your serves. Your form is all wrong. I could show you how to fix it after practice tomorrow.”
“Would you?” (Y/N) turned to sit up on his knees, staring up at Kiyoomi, shoes now forgotten.
“I guess, if it meant I got to know you better.” Kiyoomi’s blush darkened as he messed with his zipper. “I said you were important to me, didn't I?” He looked away with a huff.
“Yeah I guess you did.” (Y/N) laughed, turning back to his shoes. “I guess I’ll see you tomorrow then, Kiyoomi. I can’t thank you enough!”
(Y/N) grabbed his duffle bag and scampered out of the gym without another word, quick to hide his hot face from his team mate, aching shoulder now forgotten. He stopped when he rounded the nearest corner, pressing his back against the wall with a giddy smile.
I’m important to him.
In the gym Kiyoomi stood where (Y/N) had left him, with a matching giddy smile face hidden behind his mask.
We’re training together tomorrow! Just us!