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Books Read - Not Completed (MHA), DiaKatsuki’s Faves, Almost every Bakugou fanfic I have read, To be or not to be completed, MHA Fics Berry Loves, Boom Bitch💥, Anonymous
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Published:
2021-09-07
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2024-01-23
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4/?
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fruit salad

Anonymous

Summary:

sylv stallone (4:15 p.m.): it’s nothing to be ashamed of bro!!!

sylv stallone (4:15 p.m.): bakugou totally has the sculpted body of a greek god haha no homo

roman zolanski (4:15 p.m.): oh kirishima baby :(

roman zolanski (4:16 p.m.): is it dark in that closet? :((

Notes:

hi i wanted to write a chatfic so here goes. this is more of an experiment than anything,,,, i guess if you guys are interested i might add more chapters?

anyway the nicknames might be confusing in some circumstances, so if you're confused at all pls feel free to ask in the comments and i'll do my best to explain!!!

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: what happens in russia

Summary:

short first chapter? testing the waters.

Notes:

name key (will be updated as new characters appear)!
- god: kaminari
- sylv stallone: kirishima
- shooters 4 klee: bakugou
- roman zolanski: ashido
- Mighty Boy!!: midoriya
- it's a bird it's a plane it's uravity: uraraka
- dm for free expensive stuff: todoroki
- bondage: sero
- ✧･ﾟ: * aoyama *:･ﾟ✧: aoyama
- violet parr: hagakure
- Lmao balls: mineta

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

maybe light yagami was right

god (4:09 p.m.): status update best friends! i like boys

god (4:09 p.m.): feeling: fruity 

sylv stallone (4:10 p.m.): Hahahahahah so manly dude!!!

sylv stallone (4:10 p.m.): wait,

sylv stallone (4:10 p.m.): /srs or /j

god (4:10 p.m.): :D 

sylv stallone (4:10 p.m.): Kaminari???? /srs or /j????

god (4:10 p.m.): yes!! 👍

sylv stallone (4:10 p.m.): ?????????????

bondage (4:13 p.m.): BE WHO YOU AREEEE

bondage (4:13 p.m.): FOR YOUR PRIDEEE

roman zolanski (4:11 p.m.): LMAOOO WHAT HAPPENED KAMINARI

roman zolanski (4:11 p.m.): you were fine at school??

god (4:11 p.m.): ashido my love the light of my life are you implying that i am not ‘fine’ now that i like boys?

god (4:11 p.m.): how very homophobic of you!

roman zolanski (4:11 p.m.): shut up

god (4:11 p.m.): to discriminate against me for my sexuality… not plus ultra at all. i’m shattered. all i wanted was for you to support me. 

Mighty Boy!! (4:12 p.m.): wasn’t kaminari-kun training with kacchan after class today?

Mighty Boy!! (4:12 p.m.): he said kacchan was gonna help him with his back squat form iirc!!!!!!

sylv stallone (4:12 p.m.): ah

roman zolanski (4:13 p.m.): ah

bondage (4:13 p.m.): ah

it’s a bird it’s a plane it’s uravity (4:13 p.m.): ah

dm for free expensive stuff (4:14 p.m.): ah 

violet parr (4:14 p.m.): ah

dm for free expensive stuff (4:14 p.m.): How was it, Kaminari?

god (4:14 p.m.): i saw god

god (4:14 p.m.): mark this date on my gravestone as the day i reached nirvana

sylv stallone (4:14 p.m.): @shooters 4 klee now look what you’ve done! you’ve gone and broken kaminari! >:(

god (4:15 p.m.): HELPK??#$#$

god (4:15 p.m.): WHY WUODL YOU FUCKIGBN PING HIM FO RHTIS

god (4:15 p.m.): I DONT WANT HIM TO KNWO?????/

sylv stallone (4:15 p.m.): know what :0

sylv stallone (4:15 p.m.): it’s nothing to be ashamed of bro!!!

sylv stallone (4:15 p.m.): bakugou totally has the sculpted body of a greek god haha no homo

roman zolanski (4:15 p.m.): oh kirishima baby :(

roman zolanski (4:16 p.m.): is it dark in that closet? :((

god (4:16 p.m.): YEAH THAT’S TOTALYL FINE SURE OKAY

god (4:16 p.m.): YEAH ALL GOIOD HEY BAKUGOU MAN YOU WER ELIKE MYN GAY AWAKNENING BECAUSE I GOT ONE GLINMPSE OF YOUR VOLUPTUOUS ASS WHILE DOINGB BACK SQUATS ANMD FEL LIN LVOE WIYHY OU

god (4:16 p.m.): BUT NOTHIGN TO BE FUCJIGBN ASHAMNED OF RIGJT KRIISHIMA

it’s a bird it’s a plane it’s uravity (4:16 p.m.): how did you manage to make that many typos in one sentence and still correctly spell "voluptuous" of all things

Lmao balls (4:16 p.m.): LOL if U need advice on being a homo just ask aoyama XD

it’s a bird it’s a plane it’s uravity (4:17 p.m.): ugh it’s you

roman zolanski (4:17 p.m.): gross.

violet parr (4:17 p.m.): not this mf again...

✧･ﾟ: * aoyama *:･ﾟ✧ (4:17 p.m.): je vais t’arracher ta colonne vertébrale et l’utiliser comme une corde à sauter!!

✧･ﾟ: * aoyama *:･ﾟ✧ (4:17 p.m.): sale pétasse（*＾ワ＾*）

Lmao balls (4:18 p.m.): ???? 

shooters 4 klee (4:18 p.m.): LMAOOOOOOO

shooters 4 klee (4:19 p.m.): pas mal, garçon scintillant. pas mal du tout.

✧･ﾟ: * aoyama *:･ﾟ✧ (4:19 p.m.): merci (❁´◡`❁)

bondage (4:19 p.m.): ayo???? wtf was that

roman zolanski (4:19 p.m.): BAKUGOU YOU SPEAK FRENCH????

god (4:19 p.m.): god that’s hot

shooters 4 klee (4:20 p.m.): you’re fucking pathetic.

god (4:20 p.m.): laughs in degradation kink

shooters 4 klee (4:20 p.m.): 

sylv stallone (4:20 p.m.): bro ur so manly :D where’d you learn to speak french?

shooters 4 klee (4:21 p.m.): i lived in paris for two years.

roman zolanski (4:21 p.m.): ?@#)@#)(???@#)@#*(@*&

sylv stallone (4:21 p.m.): FOR REAL???????

shooters 4 klee (4:21 p.m.): my parents thought i had better modelling prospects there 

sylv stallone (4:21 p.m.): MODELLING

sylv stallone (4:21 p.m.): WHO EVEN ARE YOU

sylv stallone (4:21 p.m.): IT’S LIKE I DON’T EVEN KNOW YOU SOMETIMES

shooters 4 klee (4:21 p.m.): it’s cute that you ever thought you did.

sylv stallone (4:22 p.m.): BRO???????????

Mighty Boy!! (4:22 p.m.): if you think this is a big deal, wait until you hear about russia

sylv stallone (4:22 p.m.): what about russia?

Mighty Boy!! (4:22 p.m.): :)

sylv stallone (4:22 p.m.): WHAT ABOUT RUSSIA

sylv stallone (4:22 p.m.): MIDORIYA COME BACK

sylv stallone (4:23 p.m.): MIDORIYA????????????

Notes:

thank u to rocky for the french help!!!!

Chapter 2

Notes:

name key:
- god: kaminari
- bass boosted g note: jirou
- shooters 4 klee: bakugou
- roman zolanski: ashido
- Mighty Boy!!: midoriya
- dm for free expensive stuff: todoroki
- bondage: sero

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

maybe light yagami was right

bass boosted g note (4:51 a.m.): i can’t tell who it is but someone’s been listening to mitski on loop for the last five hours

bass boosted g note (4:51 a.m.): i am a little concerned 

Mighty Boy!! (4:53 a.m.): what are they listening to?? :0

bass boosted g note (4:53 a.m.): uh 

bass boosted g note (4:54 a.m.): class of 2013 

Mighty Boy!! (4:54 a.m.): that would be kacchan

bass boosted g note (4:54 a.m.): wh

bass boosted g note (4:54 a.m.): what,

Mighty Boy!! (4:54 a.m.): he’ll stop in a few hours don’t worry!

bass boosted g note (4:54 a.m.): THAT DOES NOTHING TO COMFORT ME

bass boosted g note (4:54 a.m.): @shooters 4 klee yo are you,,, okay

shooters 4 klee (4:55 a.m.): how abou tyou mind your fuckign busines s.

bass boosted g note (4:55 a.m.): i,

Mighty Boy!! (4:56 a.m.): leave it alone jirou, there’s no point :)

bass boosted g note (4:56 a.m.): both of you terrify me

Mighty Boy!! (4:56 a.m.): goodnight jirou :)

bass boosted g note (4:57 a.m.): … goodnight midoriya

 

god (7:37 a.m.): bakugou????????

god (7:38 a.m.): why were you listening to mitski at four in the morning…….

shooters 4 klee (7:39 a.m.): i never did that

god (7:39 a.m.): jirou literally heard you

shooters 4 klee (7:39 a.m.): 

shooters 4 klee (7:39 a.m.): I said it didn’t happen.

shooters 4 klee (7:39 a.m.): Understood?

god (7:40 a.m.): yes sir

shooters 4 klee (7:40 a.m.): good.

bondage (7:41 a.m.): idk what y’all are talking about but whatever it is, it just made kaminari walk into the fridge door

bondage (7:41 a.m.):

bondage (7:42 a.m.): oh i see

roman zolanski (7:43 a.m.): @god are you alive

god (7:44 a.m.): nnmnnm,,,. .

roman zolanski (7:44 a.m.): thoughts and prayers

roman zolanski (7:44 a.m.): @shooters 4 klee take responsibility >:(

shooters 4 klee (7:45 a.m.): a single word of praise and he’s malfunctioning? pathetic.

god (7:45 a.m.): HHNMNNNG., ,.

roman zolanski (7:46 a.m.): you managed to somehow feed his degradation kink and praise kink at the same time. props.

god (7:46 a.m.): ppls

god (7:47 a.m.): bakugou katsuki if you are reading htis i am free on tjrhursday night. if youw ould like to hang out i am free on thursdsdy nigth wjern i am free to hang out please respond adn come voer when ia m free on thursday so we can habg out on thursday whe n iam free

shooters 4 klee (7:48 a.m.): die

god (7:48 a.m.): kill me yourself

shooters 4 klee (7:49 a.m.): bet.

Mighty Boy!! (7:49 a.m.): kacchan we’ve talked about this you can’t kill our classmates >:[

shooters 4 klee (7:49 a.m.): “yOu cAn’T kiLl oUr cLaSsMaTes” i’m literally neurodivergent and a minor :/

bondage (7:50 a.m.): finding out bakugou has a sense of humor and is actually secretly funny has changed the trajectory of my life irreversibly

dm for free expensive stuff (7:50 a.m.): So True Bestie!

bondage (7:50 a.m.): wh

god (7:50 a.m.): TODOROKI??

dm for free expensive stuff (7:51 a.m.): Bakugou, did I use that right?

shooters 4 klee (7:51 a.m.):

shooters 4 klee (7:51 a.m.): ... yeah

shooters 4 klee (7:51 a.m.): you sure did

dm for free expensive stuff (7:51 a.m.): :D

Notes:

hi quick update bc exams are coming and blackugou is just Not Writing Itself >:(

anyways people liked simp denki so. more of that ig

Chapter 3: i'm not hearing ANYBODY out

Summary:

it's come to my attention that some people actually find me funny, so here i am again making it everyone's problem

Notes:

this entire chapter is just a running inside joke from the server at this point but i will die on the "tensei was bkg's gay awakening" hill it just holds so much opportunity

name key:
- god: kaminari
- sylv stallone: kirishima
- shooters 4 klee: bakugou
- roman zolanski: ashido
- Mighty Boy!!: midoriya
- it's a bird it's a plane it's uravity: uraraka
- bondage: sero
- ✧･ﾟ: * aoyama *:･ﾟ✧: aoyama
- violet parr: hagakure
- lady dimitrescu: yaoyorozu
- zoom zoom crash: iida

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

maybe light yagami was right

god (6:37 p.m.): hey guys!!!

shooters 4 klee (6:38 p.m.): shut up

god (6:38 p.m.): sorry

sylv stallone (6:39 p.m.): BAKUGOU >:(

shooters 4 klee (6:39 p.m.): what.

sylv stallone (6:39 p.m.): >:((((

shooters 4 klee (6:39 p.m.): ugh

shooters 4 klee (6:39 p.m.): fine

sylv stallone (6:40 p.m.): go on kaminari :)

god (6:40 p.m.): :D

god (6:40 p.m.): you guys know tamaki senpai? from the big three???

sylv stallone (6:41 p.m.): yeah he’s super manly!!! we interned under fatgum together :D

god (6:41 p.m.): yeah, him! do you think if he ate horse meat he would get a, uh…

god (6:41 p.m.): yk

god (6:41 p.m.): would it grow

sylv stallone (6:41 p.m.): 

shooters 4 klee (6:41 p.m.): 

sylv stallone (6:42 p.m.): bakugou was right. your speaking rights have been revoked

god (6:42 p.m.): most people rejected his message… they hated jesus because he told them the truth……

shooters 4 klee (6:43 p.m.): i will literally set you on fire if you don’t shut up

god (6:43 p.m.): hot

zoom zoom crash (6:43 p.m.): Bakugou! Please refrain from threats of violence!

zoom zoom crash (6:44 p.m.): And Kaminari! Please… refrain from speaking.

bondage (6:44 p.m.): LMFAOOOOOOO BRUTAL

god (6:44 p.m.): YOU CAN’T SILENCE ME FOREVER

shooters 4 klee (6:45 p.m.): oh?

god (6:45 p.m.): sorry i didn’t mean taht

god (6:45 p.m.): consider me silenced

shooters 4 klee (6:45 p.m.): that’s what i thought.

sylv stallone (6:46 p.m.): kaminari….

sylv stallone (6:46 p.m.): this is getting kind of pathetic to watch

shooters 4 klee (6:46 p.m.): kaminari is generally just pathetic

god (6:46 p.m.): 

god (6:46 p.m.): ?????

god (6:46 p.m.): HESAID MY NAME

god (6:47 p.m.): KMIANRI IS MY NMAE

god (6:47 p.m.): HE SAIDIHIT HE SAUDI YM NAME???#@?$#?

god (6:47 p.m.): HEHELELGOFSODRGFL??#$?#?rnklefjllsjf

god (6:47 p.m.): TATSH ME THATS ME IM KAMAINRI HE SAID ME

sylv stallone (6:47 p.m.): jesus christ

god (6:47 p.m.): !<?$#$?#P%$O#%)(

bondage (6:48 p.m.): kaminari is never beating these allegations huh

roman zolanski (6:48 p.m.): nope

god (6:48 p.m.): THATS EM ITS ME IM KAMINARI LKAMRINI IS MMYNME HE SAID M NAME

sylv stallone (6:49 p.m.): dude bakugou literally knows all of our names this is not the win you think it is

roman zolanski (6:49 p.m.): NO WAY???

shooters 4 klee (6:49 p.m.): no he’s right

shooters 4 klee (6:49 p.m.): i just don’t like any of you

roman zolanski (6:49 p.m.): oh

it's a bird it's a plane it's uravity (6:49 p.m.): actually yeah i’ve seen him use everyone’s name at one point i think

it's a bird it's a plane it's uravity (6:49 p.m.): except iida’s for some reason. he refuses to name iida…

zoom zoom crash (6:50 p.m.): That is something I’ve noticed, actually…

bondage (6:50 p.m.): nerd on nerd crime :/

shooters 4 klee (6:50 p.m.): i know his name.

Mighty Boy!! (6:51 p.m.): kacchan’s known iida’s name since before we came to UA

zoom zoom crash (6:51 p.m.): … Excuse me?

Mighty Boy!! (6:51 p.m.): it’s true!!!

shooters 4 klee (6:51 p.m.): can confirm

zoom zoom crash (6:51 p.m.): How…

shooters 4 klee (6:51 p.m.): your brother’s hot

sylv stallone (6:51 p.m.):

roman zolanski (6:51 p.m.): 

it's a bird it's a plane it's uravity (6:52 p.m.): 

roman zolanski (6:52 p.m.): HWAT

sylv stallone (6:52 p.m.): EXCUSE ME

it's a bird it's a plane it's uravity (6:52 p.m.): WHAT

god (6:52 p.m.): NO

zoom zoom crash (6:53 p.m.): 

zoom zoom crash (6:53 p.m.): As in…

Mighty Boy!! (6:53 p.m.): your older brother tensei? yeah

Mighty Boy!! (6:53 p.m.): he was essentially kacchan’s gay awakening

zoom zoom crash (6:53 p.m.): oh my god

shooters 4 klee (6:53 p.m.): have you seen that man??? fine as hell.

zoom zoom crash (6:54 p.m.): Oh My God

god (6:54 p.m.): WHAT DOES HE AHVE THAT I DONT

shooters 4 klee (6:54 p.m.): do you want me to answer that? because i’m about to hurt your feelings Real Bad

god (6:54 p.m.): ,,,, never mind

zoom zoom crash (6:54 p.m.): Oh God Oh Fuck

Mighty Boy!! (6:54 p.m.): kacchan i think you broke iida

zoom zoom crash (6:54 p.m.): no,,,,,,,,,,,, no,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, no,

shooters 4 klee (6:54 p.m.): i would climb iida tensei like a tree

zoom zoom crash (6:55 p.m.): NO

bondage (6:55 p.m.): this is not how i expected to find out that bkg experiences attraction

zoom zoom crash (6:55 p.m.): 

lady dimitrescu (6:55 p.m.): Why is Iida crying?

lady dimitrescu (6:57 p.m.): Oh.

Mighty Boy!! (6:57 p.m.): guys trust me ingenium is the least controversial of kacchan’s celebrity crushes

bondage (6:57 p.m.): ,,, what do you mean by that

roman zolanski (6:57 p.m.): @shooters 4 klee 👀

bondage (6:57 p.m.): 👀

it's a bird it's a plane it's uravity (6:58 p.m.): 👀

bass boosted g note (6:58 p.m.): 👀

violet parr (6:58 p.m.): 👀

shooters 4 klee (6:58 p.m.): …

shooters 4 klee (6:58 p.m.): are you familiar with pro hero gang orca

bondage (6:58 p.m.): OH MY GFUKCING GOD NO PLEASE

shooters 4 klee (6:58 p.m.): (:

Notes:

missed the opportunity for bkg to make a pretty amusing third leg joke but i'd think that would be borderline enough that i would have to change the fic rating and i don't really feel like doing that so,

Chapter 4: you are like papa

Summary:

someone needs to tell hagakure the deal with the cat videos before she implodes. also krbk are besties but in a "bkg wants to study krshm in a lab like a rat" kind of way

Notes:

heyyyyyy :)

this chapter's for zeejacks. thanks for reminding me this fic existed. it's also for my papa. because every time i write out the word "papa" i think of her.

this is terrible bc i used it as a writing warmup for my other wip. that is why i get sidetracked like fifty billion times over the span of this chapter. if u are waiting for the duplicis update that is next. sorry i'm physically incapable of updating fics without a minimum 6 month gap between chapters. love u guys tho

name key:
- god: kaminari
- bass boosted g note: jirou
- dm for free expensive stuff: todoroki
- shooters 4 klee: bakugou
- roman zolanski: ashido
- Mighty Boy!!: midoriya
- bondage: sero
- Aizawa-Sensei: aizawa

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

maybe light yagami was right

bondage (2:14 p.m.): days since midoriya has called all might dad: zero 

Mighty Boy!! (2:15 p.m.): HEY >:0

violet parr (2:15 p.m.): AGAIN?

violet parr (2:15 p.m.): MAN

Mighty Boy!! (2:15 p.m.): it was an accident!!!!!

shooters 4 klee (2:15 p.m.): fucking dweeb

Mighty Boy!! (2:15 p.m.): :( 

sylv stallone (2:16 p.m.): don’t be sad midoriya!!!! your bond with all might is super manly :)

bondage (2:16 p.m.): 10/10 most wholesome father son duo ever

sylv stallone (2:16 p.m.): ok slow down that one goes to bakugou and his dad

Mighty Boy!! (2:17 p.m.): what

violet parr (2:17 p.m.): what

bondage (2:17 p.m.): what

shooters 4 klee (2:17 p.m.): what.

sylv stallone (2:17 p.m.): you can’t hide it anymore bro i saw the texts

sylv stallone (2:17 p.m.): no shame in it!!!! 

shooters 4 klee (2:17 p.m.): literally what the fuck are you talking about

Mighty Boy!! (2:17 p.m.): i would also like to know ^

Mighty Boy!! (2:17 p.m.): wholesome is not the word i would use to describe kacchan’s relationship with his father

sylv stallone (2:17 p.m.): i borrowed bakugou’s phone to look something up the other day!!!!

sylv stallone (2:18 p.m.): and his texts with his dad were just a back and forth exchange of cute cat videos!!! :D

shooters 4 klee (2:18 p.m.): why were you reading my texts.

sylv stallone (2:18 p.m.): i got curious :D

shooters 4 klee (2:18 p.m.): go to hell

sylv stallone (2:18 p.m.): :D 

god (2:18 p.m.): HOW DID YOU NOT JUST DIE

sylv stallone (2:18 p.m.): best bro privileges :D 

bondage (2:18 p.m.): bakugou called you a glorified punching bag this morning.

shooters 4 klee (2:18 p.m.): i never said that

bondage (2:18 p.m.): we have you on video

shooters 4 klee (2:19 p.m.): kirishima is my friend.

violet parr (2:19 p.m.): can we circle back

violet parr (2:19 p.m.): let’s talk about bakugou sending cat videos to his dad

shooters 4 klee (2:19 p.m.): that never fucking happened

sylv stallone (2:19 p.m.): the texts chico

sylv stallone (2:19 p.m.): they never lie

shooters 4 klee (2:19 p.m.): the last time i texted my old man was two weeks ago when he asked me what the hag’s favorite restaurant was

violet parr (2:19 p.m.): your dad… doesn’t know your mom’s favourite restaurant?

shooters 4 klee (2:19 p.m.): THAT’S WHAT I’M FUCKING SAYING

violet parr (2:20 p.m.): omg. men.

it’s a bird it’s a plane it’s uravity (2:20 p.m.): men.

shooters 4 klee (2:20 p.m.): men.

shooters 4 klee (2:20 p.m.): anyways. he also conveniently asked me this on the morning of their WEDDING ANNIVERSARY. so i called him a spineless cuck and then i blocked his number.

Mighty Boy!! (2:20 p.m.): KACCHAN YOU BLOCKED UNCLES NUMBER?

sylv stallone (2:21 p.m.): BRO YOU CAN’T TREAT YOUR DAD LIKE THAT D:

shooters 4 klee (2:21 p.m.): i hope he dies

sylv stallone (2:21 p.m.): BRO.

shooters 4 klee (2:21 p.m.): unclench, loser. he’s fine. 

shooters 4 klee (2:21 p.m.): he literally sent me an email this morning begging me to unblock him.

shooters 4 klee (2:21 p.m.): he also attached a selfie of himself crying, which. isn’t doing much for the spineless cuck allegations

roman zolanski (2:21 p.m.): ok well first of all bakugou u are iconic u are the moment

shooters 4 klee (2:21 p.m.): i know

roman zolanski (2:21 p.m.): shut the fuck up bitch DAMN. anyways second of all does that mean kirishima hallucinated the cat videos.

sylv stallone (2:22 p.m.): it’s a real possibility :D 

sylv stallone (2:22 p.m.): last week i ran out of protein powder so i’ve been using baking soda as a replacement :D 

shooters 4 klee (2:22 p.m.): what

sylv stallone (2:22 p.m.): i have been seeing people in my periphery at night :D 

sylv stallone (2:22 p.m.): also i’ve thrown up sixteen times this week :D 

roman zolanski (2:22 p.m.): what

bondage (2:22 p.m.): so you. you threw up multiple times and CONTINUED CONSUMING IT? 

sylv stallone (2:22 p.m.): gotta get those gains B)

shooters 4 klee (2:22 p.m.): there is No Protein in baking powder, kirishima.

sylv stallone (2:22 p.m.): aw man rly????

sylv stallone (2:22 p.m.): well thats ok maybe it can be a placenta :D 

shooters 4 klee (2:22 p.m.): a what.

sylv stallone (2:22 p.m.): like the placenta effect bro

shooters 4 klee (2:22 p.m.):

shooters 4 klee (2:23 p.m.): kirishima you are so depressingly stupid that i often find myself astounded that you made it past the age of two.

sylv stallone (2:23 p.m.): :D 

violet parr (2:23 p.m.): guys. the CAT VIDEOS

god (2:23 p.m.): didn’t we already establish that the cat videos were a hallucination induced by kirishima’s continued overconsumption of baking soda

shooters 4 klee (2:23 p.m.): that’s a lot of big words from you isn’t it

shooters 4 klee (2:23 p.m.): no typos either. i’m almost impressed.

bondage (2:24 p.m.): kaminari just shorted out the classroom bakugou can u NOT

shooters 4 klee (2:24 p.m.): WHY IS IT MY FUCKING FAULT HE CAN’T BE NORMAL AROUND ME

god (2:24 p.m.): mmmrgh

violet parr (2:24 p.m.): all my hard investigative work and the cat videos weren’t REAL. should i kill myself.

shooters 4 klee (2:24 p.m.): yes

shooters 4 klee (2:24 p.m.): also i never said the cat videos weren’t real.

violet parr (2:24 p.m.): THEY’RE REAL?

shooters 4 klee (2:24 p.m.): why aren't you killing yourself. smh this new generation has no sense of commitment.

sylv stallone (2:24 p.m.): NO SUICIDE BAITING BRO

Mighty Boy!! (2:24 p.m.): oh that ship sailed a long time ago kirishima :)

sylv stallone (2:24 p.m.): wdym :0

shooters 4 klee (2:24 p.m.):

shooters 4 klee (2:25 p.m.): hey izuku have i mentioned you are my bestest friend in the whole wide world

Mighty Boy!! (2:25 p.m.): really kacchan :) 

shooters 4 klee (2:25 p.m.): really

shooters 4 klee (2:25 p.m.): in fact how about i tell you about it over an all might movie marathon and some homemade katsudon ^_^

Mighty Boy!! (2:25 p.m.): sounds great kacchan :D <3

bass boosted g note (2:25 p.m.): did we just witness an extortion in real time

sylv stallone (2:25 p.m.): bro what ship sailed bro

roman zolanski (2:25 p.m.): idk i’m caught on bakugou using the ^_^ emoticon

violet parr (2:25 p.m.): WILL I EVER KNOW THE TRUTH ABOUT THE CAT VIDEOS. GOD.

dm for free expensive stuff (2:25 p.m.): Cat Videos?

dm for free expensive stuff (2:25 p.m.): Oh. Like the videos Bakugou and Aizawa-Sensei exchange.

violet parr (2:25 p.m.): 

bass boosted g note (2:25 p.m.):

roman zolanski (2:25 p.m.):

bondage (2:25 p.m.): 

sylv stallone (2:25 p.m.): ohhh it was aizawa-sensei you were sending them to!!!!!!

shooters 4 klee (2:25 p.m.): yeah 

sylv stallone (2:25 p.m.): bro haha then why is aizawa-sensei’s contact saved as “papa” on your phone 

roman zolanski (2:26 p.m.): it’s saved as WHAT

shooters 4 klee (2:26 p.m.): because he is papa

bondage (2:26 p.m.): BAKUGOU WHAT THE FUCK

bondage (2:26 p.m.): DOES SENSEI KNOW

shooters 4 klee (2:26 p.m.): yeah

bondage (2:26 p.m.): AND HE’S FINE WITH YOU CALLING HIM PAPA

shooters 4 klee (2:26 p.m.): yeah

bass boosted g note (2:26 p.m.): hey so do u guys remember when kaminari accidentally called aizawa-sensei dad one morning and sensei told him off for “overstepping professional boundaries” and kaminari started crying

god (2:26 p.m.): yeah :(

bass boosted g note (2:26 p.m.): ok so that happened but bakugou’s allowed to call sensei papa?

shooters 4 klee (2:26 p.m.): i’m special

bass boosted g note (2:26 p.m.): how

shooters 4 klee (2:26 p.m.): favourite child privilege

bass boosted g note (2:26 p.m.): i call bullshit sensei doesn’t have favourites. he tolerates us all equally.

god (2:27 p.m.): @Aizawa-Sensei confirm?

Aizawa-Sensei (2:28 p.m.): Kaminari I have reminded you multiple times not to message me unless it is an urgent matter.

Aizawa-Sensei (2:28 p.m.): This is why Bakugou is my favourite.

god (2:28 p.m.): 

shooters 4 klee (2:28 p.m.): thanks papa :) 

Aizawa-Sensei (2:28 p.m.): 👍

god (2:28 p.m.): every day i wake up and i wish i was never born.

Notes:

somewhere along the way this stopped being an active effort at humorous writing and just became a constant stream of my consciousness. and i think that's beautiful.

Notes:

my twitter, tumblr, cc, and discord server !