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november 10, 2012
“Hey babe?” Miles called, walking into the living room with his nose in his phone. He was surprised his voice didn’t shake with premature giggles. Alex glanced up, frowning at Miles’s odd tone.
“Yeah?”
“Instagram?” He asked, collapsing on the couch next to Alex and lifting his phone up. The front camera showed an incredulous Alex.
“Okay?” Alex muttered, dog-earing his page and setting his book down on the coffee table before leaning back into Miles. Miles’s arm went around Alex’s shoulders and Alex watched on the little screen as he fixed his face to fit a small, contented smile. He waited for Miles to press the button and take the picture, but the longer he waited the more Miles seemed to be choking back laughter. Alex frowned, face falling immediately, and he looked closer at the camera; recording a video. Alex immediately snapped back, blushing a bit and glaring at Miles. “Oh! It’s a- You-” He cut himself off and Miles started laughing. He rolled his eyes, angrily sliding into the couch and picking his book back up.
“Instagram’s gonna fuckin’ love this shit!” Miles exclaimed, thumbs wildly flying across the screen. Alex grumbled something about technology and no one knowing how to build dry stone walls anymore but made a mental note to either watch the no doubt incredibly embarrassing video once Miles had left or completely ignore it until it disappeared from his memory. He chose to tuck his nose into his book and continue reading until the heat had left his cheeks and the inner-cringing had stopped.
december 29, 2007
Miles was walking behind Alex, which was a rarity. Not only did Miles have slightly longer legs than Alex, he also had an energy that propelled him through life and kept him constantly going fast. But really, all Miles wanted was photographic proof that his boyfriend wasn’t a figment of his imagination.
He lifted his camera and caught the perfect picture. Alex’s head slightly down, his cheekbone and soft eyes slightly visible above his huge scarf. His posture was bad, but it made him look like a compassionate god in an old painting, spine curving to reach for the poor children. Snowflakes floated around him, landing on his black coat and in his dark hair. The slight berth everyone gave him created for a layout much like a Renaissance painting.
Miles smiled; his boyfriend created art, but he himself was also art.
Miles was proud of his picture. He was almost as proud of the caption he typed out quickly.
“Keep up, twinkle toes!” Alex called over his shoulder. Miles’s head snapped up and he was met with an even more beautiful picture; Alex’s brilliant smile. He jogged up to catch Alex’s waist in his arms and he claimed his lips in a soft kiss.
“You are so beautiful,” he murmured, and Alex grinned.
“Okay, what do you want?” Miles frowned at Alex’s words, pulling away and squinting at him. Alex’s cheeks were pink, but Miles chalked that up to the bitter cold of London in December.
“What?” Miles asked, squeezing Alex closer to him. Alex just grinned down at their tummies pressed together.
“Quit buttering me up, it’s not going to get you anything.” Alex said quietly. Miles’s frown deepened.
“You…” Miles started before halting, pulling one hand from Alex’s back and cupping Alex’s cheek with it, angling his face up until their eyes met. “You do know that you are the most gorgeous man I’ve ever met, right?” Alex closed his eyes. “You are beautiful, way outta my league, way fuckin’ outta my league, mate.” Alex let all the air out of his lungs in one long exhalation that painted the sky around them opaque white.
“Sure, love,” Alex murmured noncommitantly, turning on his heel and dragged Miles along down the road. Miles let himself be led, his hand tight in Alex’s.
august 3, 2013
Alex groaned loudly, throwing an arm over his face.
“You’re texting now? Jesus, Kane, that’s a stretch even for you.” Miles grinned at Alex. Miles wasn’t texting.
The phone silently took the picture. The endlessness of Alex’s perfect skin, bared from hips to hair tips. From Miles’s perch on Alex’s hips, the view was particularly beautiful. With his hand over the spot where Alex’s ribs split and opened into a low valley, Miles realized he should have felt in control, but he didn’t. He felt like a person in a museum who had just realized all the security had left and yes, fucking finally, he could touch the sculptures. The perfect porcelain of Alex’s skin was mottled with a faint pink flush - as well as a few bite marks, but those only added to his beauty, in Miles’s opinion.
“Sorry,” Miles muttered, waiting until the picture had definitely posted to Instagram before turning his phone off and chucking it on the other end of the bed. He bent low over Alex and kissed him roughly, biting his lip and pinching his skin until Alex let out a high-pitched keen. “Nice,” Miles commented, smirking down at Alex, who fixed him with a harsh glare that had no venom behind it.
may 17, 2008
“Happy anniversary, Al.” Miles stated around a bright smile, lifting the champagne glass up for Alex to clink. With sparkling eyes, Alex did just that.
“It feels like forever. Like we’ve been together forever.” Alex said softly, nursing his drink and leaning into Miles’s warmth.
“Maybe we have been.” Miles wrapped his arm around Alex’s thin shoulders and squeezed him closer. “Like, reincarnation and shit like that.” Alex hummed, eyes fixed out the window. Paris’s skyline stretched on for an eternity. France, Alex thought to himself, it’s always been France.
“Every version of me loving every version of you,” Alex murmured. Miles nodded.
“There’s gotta be some version where you hate me, though. A version where we don’t end up together, or break up.”
“Probably, yeah. I’d never not love you though, though, that’s for sure. I just wouldn’t know what to do with my feelings for a guy I didn’t know, or a guy I hated, or a guy I used to love.” Alex’s voice was getting serious. Miles was just joking, but the longer the conversation lasted, the more sure he became of its truthfulness.
“Sure?” Miles asked.
“Yeah. Weren’t you paying attention during Interstellar?” Alex scolded, nuzzling his head further into the crook between Miles’s neck and shoulder. “Love is the only thing that lasts, the only thing that transcends dimensions. And gravity, but you know. Love is the important bit.”
“And your point is…?” Miles was starting to get a rise in his chest. A feeling like crying, but internal, and more like a summer day spent in a meadow than a thunderous storm brewing. Alex shifted, but kept himself at such an angle that the only thing Miles could see was Alex’s curved body, bending to fit under Miles’s chin.
“My love for you transcends everything else.” He whispered. “Every version of me loves every version of you.” He paused. The lights from the city seemed to flicker. “Mi… I think…”
“Yeah?” Miles coaxed.
“I think I’d love you even if I’d never met you.” His voice was hesitant, as if he feared Miles would laugh at him. Instead, Miles tightened his grip on Alex’s shoulder and kissed the crown of Alex’s head.
“I think I saw you in my sleep,” Miles said, using his other hand to seek out Alex’s. “Before I met you, I mean. When I was little, I’d have these really vivid dreams, Mum’ll tell you about ‘em. And I think… I think…” Miles sighed, giving up. Alex lightly pulled away from Miles’s hold, slowly letting their eyes drift into meeting. He smiled reassuringly at Miles, and suddenly the city lights didn’t seem nearly as spectacular. Miles let his hand float across Alex’s face - Alex nuzzled into it, brown eyes burning embers in the dim light - and brought him in for a kiss. When they pulled away, Alex sighed.
“Instagram?” He prompted cautiously. Miles grinned, pulling his phone out from his back pocket and bringing it out of airplane mode. He ignored the influx of notifications and got right to the chase. Alex leaned into his neck, smiling happily, and Miles wrapped his arm around Alex’s shoulders again. Just before he took the picture, he snuck a kiss against Alex’s temple.
The resulting image was blurry - Alex’s angelic smile bursting off his face, his eyes squeezed shut, his cheeks pulled back, and his nose scrunched up. Miles looked like the luckiest man on the planet. Miles knocked out a quick caption and posted the picture, making sure it posted before returning the phone to airplane mode and shoving it back in his pocket.
He held Alex tightly, bringing him closer until he was nearly on Miles’s lap. They both sighed.
“I love you, you angel, I love you.” Alex only smiled against the column of Miles’s throat.
may 20, 2014
It only took one fight to do them in. Seven years of perfection, one fight.
Alex couldn’t even remember what they had been fighting about, but the weight of Miles yelling at him was dragging him down. Hiding behind dark sunglasses, he kept his head down and boarded the plane. Of fucking course they’d got in a fight the day he left for tour. This was going to be the end of their relationship, he was sure of it. That surety was breaking his heart and adding to a nervous bout of nausea that was swimming in his stomach. He really didn’t want to puke on the plane. Of all the places to vomit, a plane was the one place he definitely didn’t want to vomit in.
Sitting in his seat rather aggressively, Matt sent him a nervous glance. Matt opened his mouth to ask what was wrong, but Jamie grabbed his arm and shook his head - Jamie had been the one to pick Alex up. Alex remembered the look of shock on Jamie’s face as Alex had stormed out of the house, slamming the door behind him, Miles banging the door back open to scream and throw something. Alex sighed loudly, sinking down into a deep slouch that would only aid a terrible posture.
“Was it Miles?” Matt asked Jamie quietly. He nodded.
“It’s pretty bad,” Jamie added. Matt raised his eyebrows and sat next to Alex, letting Alex use both armrests.
Almost immediately, Alex pulled out his phone to keep from having to talk to Matt - or anyone, for that matter. He was met with only one notification: a message alerting Alex that it had been 79 days since he’d used Instagram and we miss you!
Almost disappointed, Alex swiped Instagram into existence. A sick feeling in his belly flared up when he saw Miles’s username at the top of his feed.
To be clear, Alex never used Instagram. He never posted anything, never commented; Miles had forced him to get an Instagram only to keep up with his own Instagram, and added that now he could follow Beyonce too!
He took a deep breath and went to Miles’s page. The breath he took disappeared in his lungs and he suddenly couldn’t breathe.
Nearly every post was either one of Alex, or of Miles and Alex, or of something Alex had gotten Miles. He scrolled fast, down to the last post he remembered seeing: a clichéd picture of their hands clasped together on stage, the crowd blurred in the background. Power couple, the caption read.
He scrolled up - a shot over Alex’s shoulder of him smiling wide, stirring peppers around in the pan: Big thank you to the best cook in the world for making the yummiest dinner I’ve ever had! xx - and up - a video of Miles pretending to take a picture of them together and Alex getting mad at him: I almost feel bad but the blush on his face makes it all worth it. Love this gorgeous angel more than anything else! Look at how precious he is! xx - and up - a picture of Alex slouching and frowning at slush on his nice boots, snow in his hair and on his coat: Like a bloody piece of art! An angel from a Renaissance painting, I’m telling you. I love him - and up and up and up until the sheer number of pictures and the amount of love Miles had confessed was making Alex more worried he’d cry than throw up.
His thumb worked fast until the screen was a scrolling blur of what Alex could make out as nothing but himself, the page finally pulling away and reloading. He’d reached the top. The page reset itself with a new post, posted 13 seconds before. He frowned; it was a picture of the terminal he had just stepped away from.
Please, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean any of it. I know this is a stretch, but you aren’t responding to my texts or calls and I don’t want us to end like this. I don’t want us to end. Remember our anniversary, what, 6 years ago now? You said your love for me transcended dimensions. You said you couldn’t possibly hate me because love is the only thing that lasts. Every version of me has loved every version of you, don’t let us be the version that doesn’t make it. Please. I love you so much my angel I love you more than anything else and I don’t want to be in a world without you my beautiful angel please
Alex gripped his phone tighter and shot up from his seat, breaking out into a full jog. People were yelling at him, he was pretty sure Jamie was running after him, but none of that mattered. He ran down through all the classes and nearly knocked over a flight attendant, almost falling over as he made a sharp turn and ran off the plane. Down the hall, leaping over customs, he ran into the terminal.
He spotted Miles immediately.
They ran into each other’s arms, colliding with enough force to draw the attention of everyone around them. Gripping each other like they thought the other had been dead, they gasped out breaths.
“I’m sorry, I’m so fucking sorry, I’m fucking-” Alex rambled, his hand grasping the back of Miles’s neck painfully.
“I know, I know, I’m sorry too.” Miles soothed, his voice shaking as well. His hands were bent into claws at Alex’s shoulders. “I love you, I love you so much. You are so beautiful.” Alex sighed against Miles’s skin, breathing him in deeply and locking the scent in his mind as if it wasn’t already there.
“I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you so so so fucking much. Fuck Miles, you’re the only fucking person who can do this to me. Jesus.” Squeezing each other closer, they pulled away only to connect their lips in a bruising kiss. When it broke, their lips stayed a hair’s breadth apart. “You posted a fucking picture of me while we were fucking,” Alex stated, his lips brushing Miles’s with every other word. Miles laughed.
“It was before we fucked.” He clarified.
“We were naked, you were fuckin’ sittin’ on my dick!”
“If I remember correctly, I was closer to your belly button.”
“You’re a dickhead.”
“But you love me,” Miles said confidently before pulling away, nervously meeting Alex’s eyes. Alex laughed.
“Of course I love you.” Alex kissed him again. An announcement rang over the speakers and they both groaned.
“That’s yours,” Miles said sadly. Alex nodded. They started to pull away, before they both thought better of it and squeezed back together, enjoying one final kiss.
“Come see me,” Alex begged, holding Miles’s face in both of his hands. His eyes were burning desperately. “Come see me, fuckin’, tonight or some shit.” Miles grinned.
“I’ll buy plane tickets the second you leave.” Alex nodded frantically. “Y’know love…” Miles started. Alex met his eyes. “This whole scene is ruining your rockstar image, and it’s being filmed by about seven different people.” Alex grinned.
“They ain’t seein’ nothing you didn’t already post on fucking Instagram.” They grinned and kissed again. “You know I hate goodbyes.” Alex murmured. Miles nodded.
“I know.” They pulled away from each other, their hands intertwined until Alex slipped too far away. Their fingers broke apart and Alex loped back onto the airplane.
His friends all leaned into his space as soon as he sat down, asking him endless questions and getting angry at him. The plane took off barely a minute after he’d sat down, and he just lifted his hand to halt the questions.
“If you wanna know what happened…” Alex started to say, glancing in all of his friends’ eyes, “it’ll be on YouTube or fuckin’, fuckin’ Instagram by the time we land.” Jamie sighed loudly.
“What the fuck did you do this time, you fucking drama queen.”
Alex grinned. The grin turned into a brilliant smile when he got a text from Miles; along with 37 missed texts and 12 missed calls, he got a simple heart eyes emoji.
still pissed about the sex pic, Alex sent back.
stop complaining, Miles texted, you looked fucking hot