Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Title: Portia's Plan

Author: Shareon

Summary: The Tendo family wanted Shiho to act as somebody's betrothed. The request sounded ordinary enough. A crossover between "P.A. (Private Actress)" and "Ranma 1/2."

Chapter 1: Introduction

One of the perks of Shiho's work was that it brought her into contact with a wide variety of situations: the star witness of a murder investigation, the spirit of a girl's deceased mother, the illegitimate daughter of a politician, the mistress of a man seeking a divorce. The roles somebody would hire a private actress to play were as diverse as they were lucrative, and as the best actress in the Hi Ao Production Company, Shiho got the most difficult requests. That also meant she got the most interesting ones.

In comparison to her history and credentials, acting as somebody's betrothed was downright pedestrian. It was one of the most commonly requested jobs in the semi-secretive industry. Any number of people could have done it, and done it for far cheaper than her. Beauty always carried a premium, and that premium was dwarfed by the price of beauty combined with talent and skill.

Ironically, its very banality was what drove Shiho's curiosity towards the request. The only reason somebody would be interested in hiring her specifically was if there were some very particular circumstance which made the job especially difficult to do. Maybe the man had a family full of actors, who were always hard to fool. Maybe the man wanted to escape the romantic attentions of a member of the yakuza, which would make the job dangerous to perform. There had to be something.

She got her first hint of what the secret behind the request could be when she pushed open the door to the company office. Sitting within were the boss and his secretary. Additionally, there were three visitors: a man and two girls. Both of the girls looked to be about the same age as Shiho.

One of the girls had flowing hair almost as long as Shiho's own was, and her toned and athletic body spoke of a life spent in vigorous activity. By nature of her profession, Shiho was physically fit, but this girl was at an entirely different level. She wore a blue, long-sleeve shirt and a yellow, A-line dress.

The other girl bore a close family resemblance to the first. It was hard to be sure, but it appeared like she was the older sister of the first girl. Her hair was cut into a bob, and she wore a fashionable red and white sweater as well as some blue shorts. She was the misfit of the three visitors, her body suggesting a more sedentary lifestyle than the other two.

Finally, there was the man. He appeared to be approximately in his 40s, with long hair and a prominent mustache. The dark gray keikogi he wore combined with his obvious physical fitness to suggest he was a practicing martial artist.

Shiho automatically began analyzing the situation. It was unusual, but not unheard of, to be engaged to a man thrice her age. One obvious scenario which came to mind was that she could be a gold digger trying to inherit a fortune, which could explain the presence of the two other girls as well. Alternatively, she could be a hopeless romantic who had had her life saved in some strange situation. Or she could be the unwitting pawn in some political machination. There was no end to the number of stories she could think of.

"This is Shiho Kobayakawa-san," the boss said, gesturing for Shiho to come closer. "These are the clients: Soun Tendo-san, and his two daughters, Nabiki-san and Akane-san."

Shiho turned her attention to Soun and asked, "What's your story?"

"Direct, isn't she?" Nabiki asked. She was the girl with the bob cut.

"The sooner I get the details, the sooner I can start planning out the role," Shiho said to Nabiki. She addressed Soun once again. "So why do you want me to act as your fiancee?"

Soun coughed. He said, "It's... uhh... not me."

"It's me," Akane said. A light blush touched her cheeks.

Shiho paused. The surprise declaration had abruptly and effectively derailed her thought process. She turned to Akane and asked, "Did you just say I'm supposed to be engaged to you?"

"Uhh..." Akane's blush intensified, and she looked to the ground at her side. "Yes."

Shiho looked down at herself to check if there could be a source of confusion. She was wearing a comfortable blouse and a long skirt with a floral pattern. Her clothes weren't revealing as such, but they did make it very clear that she was a girl.

"Are you a boy?" Shiho asked. She was fairly sure what the answer was, but that warranted a check as well.

Akane looked back at Shiho, fierce defiance in her eyes. "Of course not!"

Of the multitude of jobs Shiho had been imagining since her pager had beeped at her, the thought that she might need to act like she was engaged to another girl had never crossed her mind. The situation was obviously impossible. It wasn't legal for two girls to marry, so no matter how good a performance she put on, nobody would believe they were engaged. Yet it was also inconceivable for the boss to have made such a basic mistake. There had to be something else going on.

"Then how am I supposed to be engaged to Akane-san if we're both girls?" She had been curious as to what the big secret behind the seemingly ordinary job was. Apparently she was about to find out.

Nabiki reached over to Shiho from the couch she was sharing with Akane and offered out a pamphlet. She said, "Here."

Shiho took the sheet of paper and gave it a closer look. Featured on its front was a picture of some shallow pools of water and some tall stalks of bamboo. Its title read, "The Cursed Springs of Jusenkyou."

"There are some springs in China," Nabiki said as she settled back into the couch. "The legend is that anybody who falls into one of them will be cursed to take the shape of whatever drowned there. One of the springs is niangniquan: the spring of drowned girl."

"But that still doesn't explain how we're supposed to be engaged. The government would never accept two girls marrying each other," Shiho said. She hopped up to sit on the boss's desk.

"Jusenkyou isn't a permanent change. It's only when the victim is splashed with cold water that they transform. Hot water changes them back," Nabiki said. "You'll really be a boy and only turn into a girl temporarily."

"Is any of that actually real?" Shiho asked. She leaned forward and waved the pamphlet in front of her for emphasis.

"I think so, but I haven't found anybody who's actually been there or met anybody who's been there," Soun said.

"It's like Kuchisake-onna and Hanako-san," Nabiki said. "As long as people believe it, it doesn't matter. I already have some people spreading the rumors about it at school."

"Ugh... This sounds so complicated," Shiho said. She mussed up her hair in frustration. "Why not just hire a male P.A.?"

"And put some unknown man in a position to take advantage of my daughter?" Soun lunged out of his chair and onto his feet. "Absolutely not!"

"Okay. I was just curious," Shiho said. She held her hands up in a placating gesture. She then turned to Akane. "So why do you want me to act as your fiance?"

"We were told you were the best," Akane said.

"Thanks, but I meant why do you want anybody to act as your fiance? What are you trying to accomplish?" Shiho asked.

"There's a bunch of boys..." Akane made the word sound like an insult, "... at school. They keep trying to get me to date them, day after day. I just want them to stop."

"We're thinking if Akane were already engaged to be married, then everybody would leave her alone," Nabiki said.

"Have you tried telling them to stop?" Shiho asked. Hiring a private actress was typically the penultimate option people considered, not the first, but after hearing the complicated scenario the Tendo family had presented regarding Jusenkyou, she was prepared to believe that they favored wacky hijinks over simple solutions. That wouldn't be a problem as such, but it would still be preferable to know that in advance of taking the job.

"Of course. Every day," Akane said. She cracked the knuckles in her hands. "But they just don't know when to give up. It's annoying."

"What about the school? Can't you get them to stop it?" Shiho asked.

"Don't you think I've tried?" Soun asked. "They refuse to get involved. The principal of the school is the father of one of the boys, and nobody is willing to go against him."

"I see," Shiho said. "Well, pretending to already be engaged is a pretty normal way of scaring people away. The biggest problem I'm seeing is how to convince anybody to take it seriously. Nobody really gets married while they're still in school."

"That's not a problem," Soun said. "There's an old training buddy of mine. We made an agreement back when we were younger that if we both had children, they would get married so we could merge our two schools of martial arts. Unfortunately, Saotome-kun was never blessed with a child, but if he had had a son, he would have named him 'Ranma.' You're going to be Ranma Saotome, the heir of the Saotome School of Anything Goes Martial Arts."

"That sounds like it could work," Shiho said. An arranged marriage could certainly be a convincing explanation as to why somebody Akane's age was already engaged. The situation was somewhat contrived, but it wasn't implausibly so. "How advanced are we supposed to be?"

"Advanced?" Akane asked.

Shiho hopped off of the desk and approached Akane. She asked, "How far have we gone? Are we at A, B, or C?" It was important to know how physically intimate she was supposed to be. A couple who had never kissed acted very differently towards each other than a couple who had shared a bed.

"What?" Soun shouted. He was on his feet again. "You dare suggest that my daughter has done anything like that before marriage?"

Akane was blushing so brightly that Shiho could almost feel the heat radiating off of her, despite the fact that Akane was staring at the ground.

"Okay, okay," Shiho said. She raised her hands up in a placating gesture once again. "I think it's safe to say we haven't gotten to A yet."

"Does that mean you're willing to take the job?" the boss asked.

"Yes," Shiho said.

Something still felt off to her, like she was missing something important, but that was more common than not at the start of a contract. Her jobs always had some hidden twist to them. The counterpoint to the perk of encountering a wide variety of interesting situations was that Shiho was also constantly facing unpredictable challenges. From fielding impromptu questions about the influence of Gustave Courbet upon Pierre-Auguste Renoir's early paintings to escaping the murderous designs of serial killers, Shiho had faced any number of surprises in the past. No matter what twist this job ended up having, she was sure she could handle it.

Shiho could have just pretended to be a generic martial artist. She was already experienced with stage fighting, so she knew how to take an impressive stance and how to look good both throwing and receiving a punch.

However, that simply wasn't good enough. If she was supposed to be the heir to a school of martial arts, then she wanted to know what made that school better than every other one out there. It was the details which added the verisimilitude needed to provide a truly convincing performance. Saying she was studying to be a doctor was one thing, but saying she was studying to be a hematologist due to her aunt having developed leukemia back when she had been a young child was quite another.

For that same reason, in addition to Soun, Akane was present as well. They were supposed to be betrothed to each other, which meant that Shiho and Akane needed to have some kind of shared history and relationship. A few days spent together was woefully inadequate, but it was infinitely better than having nothing at all.

The Saotome house was modest. It was designed in the style of Japanese architecture from decades earlier. Its outside featured numerous rectangular sections between horizontal and vertical wooden beams. The doors and windows had a papery appearance to them, as was also traditional. The upper floor was patterned very similar to the ground floor, and it was topped with a dark, tiled roof. It was effectively indistinguishable from any number of neighboring houses along the street.

Waiting at the front door of the house was a man approximately in his 40s. He wore a martial arts keikogi, his being an off-white approximately the same color as the walls beside him. He had a pair of glasses on his face and a bandanna covering the top of his head.

"Saotome-kun!" Soun cried out, confirming Shiho's assumption that the man in question was in fact Genma Saotome, the master of the Saotome School of Anything Goes Martial Arts.

"Tendo-kun! Come in, come in," Genma said. He gestured emphatically. "And Akane-chan. You're looking stronger every day. We should spar later."

"Hello, Saotome-ojisan," Akane said. She gave a greeting bow and then entered the house with everybody else.

"Thank you for your help," Soun said.

Shiho closed the door behind them.

"Of course. Of course," Genma said. He looked at down at Shiho. "Then you must be that girl they want to pretend is my heir."

"That's right, but please, call me 'Ranma,' or whatever else you'd call your son. It's better to get into the habit now," Shiho said. Amateurs always made mistakes, from showing a lack of surprise at a supposedly unexpected event to calling out the wrong name in a moment of stress. The fewer opportunities they had to make one, the better. Akane and Nabiki were the two for whom it was really important to get right, but it would make it easier for them if she were consistent with everybody.

To that end, Shiho had dressed the part as well. She wore a red shirt and black trousers, which was appropriate enough for either a boy or a girl to wear. They were both slightly looser than could be ideal, which was intentional in keeping with the idea of a Jusenkyou transformation.

Genma looked Shiho up and down as if he were a casting director interviewing for a role. He then said, "There's no way I'd have raised such a pathetic heir."

"That's what I'm here for," Shiho said. "I need you to teach me what I need to do in order to not look like a pathetic heir."

Genma crossed his arms in front of him. He said, "Impossible. It'd take years of training to even begin learning the basics of the Saotome School of Anything Goes Martial Arts."

"I don't need to know it. I just need to look like I know it. It's like in the movies. The actors don't actually know how to do all those things they're doing. They just need to look like they do," Shiho said. It was far harder to fake things in the world of private acting, without any scripts or tactical camera positioning to hide behind, but it wasn't impossible.

Genma scoffed.

"Just show me what I should know. Like what would you do if somebody were to challenge you to a fight?" Shiho asked.

Genma scoffed again.

"Saotome-kun. Please. Just show her your opening stance," Soun said.

"It's a waste of time," Genma said, but he moved to an open area of the living room. He stepped forward with his left leg, his right foot remaining behind twisted sideways, until his feet were separated by approximately a meter of distance. He raised his arms as well, his left hand level with his shoulder and his right hand near his stomach, both of which were held slightly open. His stance looked vapid, transitional, and undedicated. He said, "Here."

"Like this?" Shiho asked. She adopted a position similar to Genma's. It felt slippery and unstable.

"Hmm..." Genma said. He punched forward. Shiho did likewise, her thrust giving expression to the desire for motion she felt.

Genma bounced twice on his feet. "Ha!" He jumped up with a twirl, kicked high into the air, completed a full revolution, and landed back on his feet as if he had never moved in the first place.

Shiho concentrated. She bounced twice on her feet, jumped up with a shout, kicked out, and landed back down. She hadn't managed to do a complete spin, but she did get most of the way there.

"Hmm..." Genma said again. He stepped in front of Shiho. "Hit me."

"What?"

"Hit me," Genma said. He gestured to his chest. "As hard as you can."

Shiho clenched her fist, as she had learned in all of her stage combat practice, and punched forward.

It smashed into Genma's open palm with a sharp thwap that Shiho felt as much as heard.

"Harder!" Genma shouted.

Shiho pulled back and punched forward again. Genma once again caught the punch, this time with a small grunt.

"Harder!" Genma shouted, louder this time.

Shiho reared back, focused herself, and punched forward with as much force as she could muster. It was met this time not with Genma's palm but with the open air as the man tapped the side of her arm. The next thing she knew, her feet were flying out from under her due to a sharp impact, and she was falling. She twisted herself and rolled as she hit the ground. Reflexively she looked up at Genma, who was descending upon her with a fist of his own. Instantly she threw up her arm to block the strike as best she could and braced for impact.

Which never came.

"That was pathetic!" Genma shouted. He loomed over Shiho, his fist close enough to her arm that she could feel the body heat from it. "But maybe not entirely useless." He stood up again and looked at Soun. "Give me a week, and I'll see what I can do."

"Thank you, my friend," Soun said.

Last Updated: September 30, 2021

Chapter Text

Chapter 2: Development

The administrator of St. Maria didn't bother asking any questions when Shiho called in to tell him that she would be arriving late to school. She had prepared a story of needing to go visit a doctor in the morning, but her carefully cultivated reputation of being a sickly girl served her well. The administrator merely noted her absence and wished her well.

That left Shiho free to conduct her surveillance.

What the Tendo family had told her had been a good start, but getting more information was always a prudent thing to do before beginning any job. Countless details which people never thought to mention were of vital importance. It could be as simple as a blocked-off road that a local would of course know about, or it could be something as substantial as needed to have an explanation as to why the busybody Yamada had never heard of her before. There was no telling what piece of seeming trivia could make or break a performance.

It was not without risk, though. If somebody saw her, it would make her subsequent presentation as Ranma Saotome that much harder. The Tendos knew what she was going to do, so the risk of exposure from them was minimal, but there was always the chance that somebody else would notice her following behind the two sisters on their way to school. However, she had a plan.

Turning invisible was impossible. Everybody knew that. The reason why that was, though, was a secret known only to lovestruck schoolgirls: it was impossible to turn invisible because, by default, people already were invisible. Bus drivers, maintenance workers, bank tellers, and innumerable other extras filled the world, each as unremarkable as spectator number 261 in a sports scene. The trick wasn't becoming invisible. The trick was finding some way to get the cute upperclassman to notice you. Failing that, somebody could walk through the Tokyo Imperial Palace as ignored and forgotten as a tree in a forest.

It was as easy as tying her hair into a braid, applying some mature makeup, donning a pair of glasses, and wearing a business suit. This transformed Shiho into one of any number of nameless, faceless office ladies on her way to work. She automatically came up with a backstory and purpose for being in Nerima: Yui Ishikawa wanted to try a new route for her daily commute in the hopes of finding the man of her dreams. She sincerely doubted anybody would question her, but it was always good to have the details straight, just in case.

She met Akane and Nabiki at the entrance to their house, although only in the loosest sense of the word. She never drew nearer than a block away from them. It was close enough to observe them but far enough away as to not be directly associated with them in the minds of any passers by. As long as she, and they, didn't do anything silly, she should remain just one more nameless person in a city full of nameless people.

The two sisters walked with the purposeful speed of familiarity, but without the vigor of being in a hurry. They didn't do anything particularly noteworthy as they went. There was no stopping to chat with any anybody along the way, and there was no pausing on a bridge to stare wistfully at the river flowing underneath. It was a dull, ordinary, bland commute to school, effectively identical to a countless number of other students' throughout the city.

And then they reached their destination.

Furinkan High School was just as nondescript as the Tendo sister's trip had been. It had a large courtyard surrounded by a wall. Its metal gates were wide open, inviting the way to the tall, rectangular, four-story building in the center of the area. While the school had its own unique details, such as the sign to the side of the entrance labeling it, much like the nameless extras on the street, there was nothing about the complex itself which made it stand out as compared to the thousands of similar schools throughout the city.

What did leap out and seize Shiho's attention were the people. A mob of teenage boys, all dressed up in various sporting gear, was milling around in the courtyard in the front of the school. That alone was unusual enough to warrant further investigation, but then somebody shouted, "Akane Tendo is here!" And it was like a riot erupted. The throng charged forward at the sisters with a thunderous roar which was half shouting voices and half stampeding feet.

Nabiki immediately reacted, but only in the most minor and technical sense of the word. She didn't scream, slow down, speed up, stop, run away, or otherwise do anything substantially different. She merely diverted her path slightly. The pure anarchy in front of her could have just been a hideous statue of a man climbing a coconut tree, for all the attention Nabiki seemed to pay to it.

Akane, in contrast, didn't appear to react at all. She simply continued walking forward, straight into the oncoming mass of boys. It was as if they didn't exist at all to her. It was enough to make Shiho think that the girl hadn't noticed them, although Akane would have had to have been both blind and deaf to have missed them.

Then Akane made contact with the edge of the mob and disappeared into a whirlwind of destruction.

Shiho had to do something. She darted her head in every direction, trying to spot anything which could help. However, there were no payphones in sight, and the streets were devoid of other people. Personally intervening was out of the question as well, as she had no illusions as to how that would go. The only thing she could think to do do was to pay close attention to the assault, such that she could act as a witness in the police investigation which was sure to follow, so pay close attention she did.

It was hard to make out what she was seeing through the chaotic confusion, though. There were flurries of punching arms and kicking legs. Makeshift weapons, such as tennis rackets, and real weapons, such as nunchuckus, were swung, commandeered, and used to parry other weapons.

And then there was only three people left standing.

There was Nabiki, who was casually walking through the courtyard in complete oblivion to the chaos now behind her. There was Akane, who had stopped in the center of the large mass of fallen bodies. And there was a tall boy wearing a kendogi - a white uwagi and a dark hakama. He wielded a boken, and he aggressively pointed that wooden sword at Akane.

The boy said something, although Shiho couldn't make out what it was due to her distance, and then he charged forward.

Without the visual distraction of a crowd, it was far easier to make out what happened next. The boy swiped down with his boken, which Akane sidestepped. She used that momentum to launch a spin kick, which smashed into the boy's torso and sent him flying across the courtyard.

Akane then brushed her hair back and continued on her way into the school building.

Shiho was paralyzed with indecision of what to do next. Her first thought was of the police, except the attackers needed medical attention, except they had attacked Akane, except they were all hurt. She wasn't sure what was first, but she did know that she would need to contact the authorities. She ran off to do so.

It was several blocks before she found a payphone, and she immediately used it to call emergency services.

"There's been a big fight," Shiho said. "There were about 30 boys. They attacked a girl. They're all beaten up now."

"Where?" the dispatcher on the phone asked.

"In Furinkan High School," Shiho said.

"Furinkan High School?"

"Yes."

"Thank you for your report. We will send somebody out immediately."

"Thank you," Shiho said. She hung up the phone and went back to the school. She was sure the police would want a statement from her about what she had seen.

Upon returning to the school, though, she saw a scene very different than the one she had left. It had only been a few minutes, but about half of the boys had disappeared. Of the ones who remained, they were in different stages of recovery. There were three walking into the school, and four more were in the process of standing up. The ones on the ground were slowly rousing themselves as well.

15 minutes later, bell signaling the start of classes chimed. The courtyard was entirely devoid of people.

30 minutes later, a man with a broom finished gathering the broken debris littering the area, removing the last sign that anything untoward had happened.

45 minutes later, the courtyard was empty once again.

60 minutes later, the authorities had still not arrived.

75 minutes later, Shiho checked the sign in the front of the school to confirm that it was in fact Furinkan High School and that she hadn't given bad directions. It was and she hadn't.

90 minutes later, Shiho gave up. It was clear that nobody was coming. Morning traffic in Tokyo was bad, but it wasn't that bad. She was bored, confused, frustrated, and she had her own classes to attend as well. The subtle hints from the guidance councilor had grown more insistent over the months that if she kept missing school, it wasn't impossible for her to repeat a year. Also, it was silly in the extreme to pay for private school and not actually attend it.

She would need to find out what exactly had happened later, when she met up with Akane in the afternoon.

Akane was already waiting at the station when Shiho arrived, and while Shiho was more than eager to get some answers, it wasn't particularly urgent. There were more basic things to do first.

"Sorry to have kept you waiting," Shiho said as she got off of the bus. She telegraphed her intention to give Akane a hug, but Akane's failure to reciprocate, aside from a hunching of her shoulders, caused Shiho to refrain. "How long have you been here?"

"Just a few minutes," Akane said. She adjusted the strap of the sports bag she had on her shoulder, and she started walking towards the Saotome home.

Shiho ran forward a few steps and positioned herself at the open side of Akane. She tried grabbing Akane's far shoulder to pull her closer. However, Akane's flinch at the touch caused Shiho to release her and take a step away.

Apparently their relationship was not meant to be that expressive.

"What happened this morning?" Shiho asked. She hovered a respectful distance away from Akane.

"What do you mean?"

"At your school."

Akane scrunched up her face and looked at Shiho. She asked, "Did something happen?"

Shiho was flabbergast. She didn't understand how Akane wouldn't immediately know what she was talking about, and she was worried that she might have somehow hallucinated the whole thing. She asked, "You had all those boys attacking you?"

"Oh, that," Akane's statement sent a flood of relief through Shiho, before it was immediately replaced by a sense of curiosity once again. "What about it?

"What was it?" Shiho asked.

Akane's hand holding the shoulder strap of her bag clenched tight into a fist. She said, "Those are the boys I told you about." She practically spat out the word again.

"You did?" Shiho asked. She thought back, but she was sure Akane hadn't told her about them. She would certainly have remembered any discussion of a mob attack, and she didn't. The only boys she could remember were...

"Those are the boys who keep pestering me for a date," Akane said.

"That's them?" Shiho exclaimed.

"Yes. Like I said, it's annoying!"

"They attack you?" Shiho asked. She had been picturing loud confessions in the courtyard or cornering Akane in the hallway. Untoward physical advances usually meant groping, fondling, and kissing, not punches, kicks, and hockey stick swings. Shiho couldn't begin to imagine what kind of circumstances would lead to a would-be boyfriend attacking a beloved girl, let alone a mob of boys doing so. "What happened?"

"There's this upperclassman in school, Kuno-senpai." As disdainful as Akane was when saying the word "boys," her pronunciation of Kuno's name put that to shame. "At the beginning of the year, he made some stupid announcement that any boy who wanted to date me had to defeat me. And all those idiotic boys listened to him. Every day since then, I've had to fight them to get to class."

"And that's why you hired me?" Shiho asked. She could scarcely keep the disbelief out of her voice.

"Yes."

"Forget the school. This is a matter for the police!"

Akane gave a big sigh. She said, "We tried that. His family is too powerful and well connected. The police won't touch them. My father is a member of the city council, and he still can't get them to do anything. They went as far as to call the commissioner in to give a report. He gave some statement about irregularities and cracking down on them, but in the end, nothing happened."

Suddenly, the lack of response to Shiho's phone call made more sense, but a larger concern struck her.

"Wait. Then if that's the case, if we announce that I'm your fiance, then won't they all attack me?" Shiho asked. She could posture and bluff as well as anybody, but 30 people was a lot of people. If just a single boy was confident enough, or foolish enough, to challenge her, it would break the mood. After that, it was almost certain the entire mob would attack.

Akane shrugged. She said, "Maybe. Who cares? It's not like it matters."

"What do you mean it doesn't matter?" Shiho asked. It was true that some of her clients didn't care what happened to her, but that was rare, and they never outright told her that. She tried to not jump to conclusions.

"They're weak," Akane said.

"What?" Shiho asked.

"They're weak," Akane repeated. "They're easy to beat. They're no threat."

The statement still failed to make sense to Shiho, but the way it didn't make sense had entirely changed. Apparently Akane thought Shiho could simply fend off the mob of attackers.

"There's 30 of them!" Shiho exclaimed.

"So what? I deal with them every day. They're pathetic. No challenge at all."

Shiho was suddenly feeling much less sanguine about the job. Fighting off a crowd was insanity. She could feel the temptation to quit right there and then. However, she had never failed a client in the past. No matter how boring, how dangerous, or how complicated a job was, she had always seen it through to the end. She had climbed the facade of a 10-story building, and she had faced down a serial killer with nothing more than the school uniform she wore. She wasn't about to let a bunch of school boys be the first mar on her record.

They reached the Saotome home, and Shiho opened the door for Akane to enter first. As she did so, Shiho called out, "Hey, pops!"

"What is it?" Genma asked. He was still obviously awkward with the roleplaying Shiho had suggested. In time, he might become more comfortable, but for now, as long as he wasn't outright breaking immersion for Akane, that was good enough.

"I got a problem for you," Shiho said. She slid off her shoes and lined them up next to Akane's near the entrance.

"Yeah?" Genma asked.

"I got to get good enough to beat 30 boys in a fight," Shiho said.

She was confident in her ability to perform a stage fight. It didn't matter if it was scripted or improvised, if it was against a single opponent or against a squad of opponents, or if she was supposed to win or supposed to lose. She knew she could handle it and make it look good. However, that was a very different experience than a real fight, let alone a real fight against such a large group.

"What?" Genma asked.

"Those boys I fight every morning. Ranma-kun's worried about them," Akane said. The name sounded awkward on Akane's lips as well, but there hadn't been any hesitation. It could have been worse.

"What about them?" Genma asked.

"If I just say I'm engaged to Akane-chan, I have no idea what they'll do. They might attack," Shiho said.

"Oh, that?" Genma scoffed. "They're weak. No heir of mine would break a sweat facing them."

"You do remember that I'm not really your heir, don't you?" Shiho asked.

"But they're easy. I could beat them blindfolded," Akane said.

"But there's 30 of them," Shiho said.

"How cowardly," Genma said. He emoted melodramatic lament. "To think that I raised such a pathetic heir."

Shiho rolled her eyes. She said, "I didn't say I was going to quit. I just need some help in case things go bad."

"If things go bad, then just improvise," Genma said.

Shiho was tempted to smack Genma on the head, but she resisted the impulse. She said, "That might be good enough for you, but not for me. Don't you have any secret techniques or tricks or anything?"

"It's true that the Saotome School of Anything Goes Martial Arts does have a number of desperation strikes, like the 'Crouch of the Wild Tiger' and the 'Flat Frog Fist,'" Genma said. "But I couldn't possibly teach them to an outsider."

Shiho was becoming increasingly frustrated. Genma treated her as an insider when she was an outsider, and he treated her as an outsider when she needed inside knowledge. The whiplash was vexing.

She gave a growl of displeasure which she tried to mask as a thinking hum. She asked, "Isn't there anything you can can do to help? How about some special training?"

"Special training?" Genma asked. His entire bearing perked up. "Ohh... Now that you mention it, there is something."

"Oh?" Shiho likewise perked up. That sounded very promising. "What's that?"

Genma shook his head. He said, "Don't worry about it. It'll take me a few days to get things ready. For now, we'll just do regular training like we had planned." He turned to Akane. "Hurry up and get changed." He turned back to Shiho. "And you, opening stance."

Akane ran off to one of the side rooms while Shiho dropped into the position Genma had shown her the day before.

Shiho had always expected that one day she would have a job where she would be covered in fish. She had just assumed that the fish would be premium sushi, and she would be contracted to act as a human platter for some a rich person trying to impress somebody with nyotaimori.

She had never imagined that the fish would be a long chain of questionable-quality sausage and that it would be draped around her head and torso like a sloppy diadem and tunic.

"Is this really training?" Akane asked. Her voice had a faint reverberation, reflecting the open space of the old warehouse they were in.

"Yes," Genma said. He tossed a book to Akane. "With this, Ranma will be unbeatable."

"Advanced Combat Training," Akane said, reading the title of the book.

"Sounds good," Shiho said. Any edge against that mob would be helpful. Additionally, this would give her some valuable insight into the world of Genma Saotome and what kind of life Ranma would have had growing up with him.

Akane opened the book and started flipping through it. She asked, "What's this training called?"

"The Cat Fist," Genma said. He loosely looped the two ends of his last chain of fish sausages together, completing the covering of Shiho's torso.

Shiho lifted her arms. The sausages were surprisingly heavy. The were also, less-surprisingly, pungent. The air around her was filled with the briny smell of seafood. She asked, "What's next?"

"Now," Genma said. He opened up a trap door beside him, and the mangy odor of dirty animals filled the room. It was strong enough to overwhelm the already substantial aroma of fish surrounding Shiho."Now we throw the trainee in!"

Genma grabbed Shiho by the back of her clothes and tossed her down the trap door as easily and negligently as if she were a sack of rice.

The first thing Shiho noticed was the smell. It had already been top of mind, and it had grown geometrically. She had been in zoo cages which had smelled better. That detail was abruptly shoved aside by the yowling and hissing which filled the air. The deeply foreboding sound felt far more urgent in the murky atmosphere. And then she noticed the eyes. In the dim gloom of the underground room, lit only by the shard of light from the trap door above, yellow eyes with vertical slits gleamed at her. She was surrounded by what looked like hundreds of cats, staring, blinking, and circling.

She felt very much like prey being sized up in the wilds of the jungle.

Genma's wrapping of her in fish sausages was already enough of an oddity that she was primed to think of them. Of course a cat would be interested in fish. Likely the only reason they hadn't attacked yet was due to her being substantially larger than them. She doubted a cat would attack anybody her size, but she wasn't interested in putting that assumption to the test.

She ripped the sausages off of her and flung them across the room. And, like Charlton Heston at the Red Sea, the ocean of fur parted before her outstretched arms. The cats to her left pounced to the left and the cats to her right pounced to the right, twin tsunamis in a frantic bid to be the first one to get some fish.

The cacophony of yowling quickly died away in favor of some meaty chewing all around her.

After several seconds of relative silence, Genma's voice floated down from the air above. "Are you done down there?"

"I think so," Shiho said. The cats had all eaten their fill and had dispersed. Some of them had curled up into lethargic balls, but most of them were milling around. One of the more enterprising one had nudged up to Shiho and was nuzzling her feet.

A rope flopped down from the trap door above. Shiho grabbed it and pulled herself up.

"How do you feel?" Genma asked.

"Like I stink," Shiho said. The musky warehouse was much more fresh than the pit below, but that only meant that she could better smell the fish residue still clinging to her.

"I meant the important stuff. Did you learn the Cat Fist?" Genma asked. He stared down at Shiho as if she were a wrapped birthday present begging to be opened.

Shiho didn't feel any different than before. She asked, "How would I know? What is it?"

"Hmm..." Genma said. He continued to stare, and then he threw his head back and laughed. "I don't know!"

"You don't know?" Shiho asked. "Haven't you ever done this before?"

"Nope!" Genma said, loudly and proudly. He turned to Akane and asked, "What's the book say about the technique?"

"The Cat Fist," Akane said. She stared into the book as she read. "It says you should tie the trainee up with fish sausages and then throw them into a pit full of hungry cats."

"We know that. What's what supposed to do?" Shiho asked.

Akane flipped the page. "This is a really stupid idea that only an idiot trainer would do. Anybody who would try to teach this technique should have their head examined."

Genma's froze, his face still reflecting the bravado from moments earlier.

"What?"

"It says it right here," Akane said. She turned the book to show them.

Shiho read the page concurrently with Genma.

Genma forcefully threw back his head laughed out loud again. He then abruptly stopped and shouted, "That's stupid! They should put important information like that first!" He turned to Shiho. "But never fear! I have something else. It's called the Breaking Point technique. It's an ancient martial arts secret from a village of Chinese Amazons."

"Did you say Chinese Amazons?" Akane asked.

Shiho was likewise suspicious, and all the more so given what she had just experienced. She asked, "What's that training entail?"

"It's..." Genma trailed off and looked up into the air. "I think I tie you up? And then drop boulders on you?" He looked back down at Shiho and confidently repeated, "That's it. I tie you up and drop boulders on you."

"You're kidding," Akane said.

"Have you ever actually done it before?" Shiho asked.

"Of course not!" Genma laughed. "That's what makes the training special!"

"I'm thinking maybe we should just stick with regular training going forward," Shiho said.

Akane nodded in agreement.

If Shiho had been the fiancee, rather than the fiance, she would have acted very differently. Depending on the nature of their relationship, she most likely would have given an energetic greeting to her beloved, clung to his arm as they walked, and teased him about something as they went.

Akane did none of that. She gave a casual greeting to Shiho at the bus stop they met at, and then she walked a respectable distance from her as they went to the Saotome home. It was a good thing that they had decided they were a pre-A relationship, because she was sure Akane wasn't ready for anything more serious than holding hands, if even that. However, that was fine. Relationships came in many different shapes and forms. Shiho would just need to adapt, which was exactly the point of the past few days together. Akane was becoming more comfortable around Shiho, and Shiho was learning more nuances about Akane.

"Did you do something good?" Shiho asked. There was a glint, a sense of smug accomplishment, to Akane's eyes. It meant she had done something she was proud of.

Akane blinked, and that look was gone, replaced by one of confusion. She asked, "How did you guess?"

"It's just how you look," Shiho said. "So what is it?"

Akane unzipped her sports bag, dug through the clothes inside of it, and pulled out a VHS cassette. Her face beamed as she said, "This. It's a recording of my morning fights. I was thinking if you're so worried about them, then maybe Saotome-ojisan could use this to help you prepare with some special training... with some special regular training," she hastily corrected herself.

"Oh, that does sound good. Thanks," Shiho said. She almost reached over to hug Akane, but she restrained herself. It was the natural thing for a boyfriend to do, but she was sure Akane wouldn't appreciate it.

The pair reached the Saotome home, and Shiho once again opened the door for Akane to enter first.

"Pops!" Shiho called out as she slid off her shoes. "Akane-chan's got a great idea."

"What's that?" Genma appeared at the entrance a moment later.

"That," Shiho said. She pointed at the recording that Akane held up for display. They then jointly repeated what they had discussed on the way from the bus station to the house.

Genma took the cassette, and the whole group migrated to the living room. Once there, Genma slid the cassette into a VCR and turned it on. The three of them then proceeded to watch the video.

It had been recorded from a classroom on an upper floor of the school, which meant they had a clear view of the entire area from above. Much like the scene Shiho had seen in person, there was a mob of boys standing in the middle of the courtyard. However, from this angle, she could also see that the boy wearing the kendogi who had remained standing near the end wasn't actually part of the main group. He lingered behind, between the mob and the school.

"That's Kuno-senpai," Akane said, pointing at that lone boy.

On the screen, Akane walked into view at a deliberate but unhurried pace. This continued as all the boys, besides Kuno, charged at her in a cluster of confusion.

It was like watching a bowling ball crash into a mass of pins. Or rather, it was like watching a mass of pins fling themselves at a bowling bawl. The boys engulfed her, but it was clear that Akane was the dominant one in the fight. There was an obvious aura around her, and any boy who dared to transgress its boundary found himself on the ground. Some were merely knocked down with a swift punch or throw. Others were sent flying further away as the result of a more exotic technique. Regardless, everybody who came within range was swiftly neutralized, and everybody else swarmed around like so many gnats before they, too, manged to get close enough to meet the same fate.

After several seconds of bedlam, order was restored to the scene by default. Everybody was on the ground except for Akane and Kuno.

Kuno pointed his boken at Akane in a threatening manner and then charged forward. He lasted several seconds longer than the other boys had, but he was ultimately sent flying across the courtyard by a swift kick.

Akane swept her hair back and glanced up at the camera. She then resumed her walk into the school, leaving the mass of boys on the ground behind her.

There was the briefest glimpse of static before the scene on the TV repeated itself. The crowd of boys was once again milling around in the center of the courtyard, and Akane once again walked into the frame. The boys all charged forward once again, and the bowling ball crash happened once again.

"Did you record it on a loop?" Shiho asked.

"No, this was Thursday's fight," Akane said.

"It looks the same," Shiho said.

"I know. I said they were easy, didn't I? If they varied their attacks, I might be okay with it for practice or something, but they do the same thing every time. It's so useless," Akane said.

The Akane on the screen once again kicked Kuno away and walked into the school. It was clearly different, in that this time Akane didn't look up at the camera, but it was the only real change Shiho noticed.

And then the scene repeated itself a third time. Everything seemed practically identical. There might have been variations, but they were subtle at best. The whole experience was giving Shiho some sense of what Akane was going through. Shiho was finding it tedious enough, and she had only been watching for a few minutes. She could only imagine needing to actually do it in person day after day for months on end.

"Akane-chan, I'm disappointed in you," Genma said as the fourth fight raged on.

"Huh?" Shiho and Akane both asked.

"You're doing the same thing every time," Genma said. He shook his head. "A practitioner of Anything Goes should know better than that. That's a big weakness you'll need to work on."

Akane looked down to the floor and said, "Sorry."

"But for now, that's an opportunity," Genma said. "The enemy is fighting in a pattern, too. You keep doing what you are doing for now, and we can set a trap for them."

"Oh..." Akane said. Her eyes widened.

Shiho looked back and forth between Akane and Genma. Clearly she had missed something. She asked, "What's that mean?"

"Let me show you," Genma said. He stopped the VCR and began to rewind it. "Watch carefully. There's a boy with boxing gloves. He always attacks with a right-left combo. And there's a boy who's wearing a baseball uniform who always dives for Akane-chan's legs."

"Okay," Shiho said, extending out the word. She wasn't sure what the value of that was. "So what does that matter?"

"That means we can tailor the response for them all. If you can memorize the pattern I've been doing, then you should be able to do the same," Akane said.

"Ohh..." Shiho said. That did sound very promising.

"Only, be careful," Genma said. "What I was just saying to Akane-chan holds true for the enemy, too. There's no guarantee they'll do the same thing they always do. You need to be ready to adapt."

"And how do I do that?" Shiho asked.

"With more training, of course," Genma said. He laughed out loud. He then started the VCR playing again. "Now you watch closely. And Akane-chan, I'll show you how to break apart an opponent's fighting style. Let's start with the boy with the swim trunks."

Last Updated: October 21, 2021

Chapter Text

Chapter 3: Twist

Shiho was feeling much more confident about the situation. Akane's and Genma's explicit understanding that the boys were a complete non-issue was contagious, and it was easy to be caught up in their pace. Additionally, the targeted training with them had been immeasurably useful. Genma had acted as the director, guiding her and Akane through each and every one of the opponents. Shiho had jumped, kicked, punched, thrown, and otherwise countered Akane hundreds of times, if not more.

The only issue was the weather. They needed to wait for a morning rain in order to set the proper stage. As tedious and as stressful as that delay was, it was useful as well. The days spent waiting were also days spent in welcome recovery. By the time an appropriate forecast arrived, Shiho's bruises had recovered to the point of being faint discolorations, and only the lingering hints of stiffness remained in her limbs.

It was finally time to introduce Ranma Saotome to the world.

Shiho called in sick to St. Maria, and then she dressed for the performance. She put on a male school uniform too large for her body, acquired from the costume department of the Hi Ao Production Company, and she used a baseball hat to hide her long hair.

She met Akane and Nabiki at the entrance of the Tendo house. The gloomy clouds overhead cast everything in a gray tinge and threatened the city with the promise of rain.

"Are you ready?" Nabiki asked.

"Of course," Shiho said. "Let's go."

As they had weeks earlier, they passed by several stores, clinics, and homes. This time, Shiho walked beside Akane in her oversized school uniform, rather than a block away dressed as an office lady. Her bearing and gait naturally shifted to reflect the different nature of the role, that of Ranma Saotome escorting his fiancee to school to see the nature of these attacks upon her.

Shiho hovered at that awkward distance suggesting she wanted to get closer, but not so close as to actively be intruding within Akane's personal space. It was a not-uncommon position for a boy to take with respect to a girl in a pre-A relationship. She consciously tried reaching for Akane's hand once, but she didn't go so far as to actually take it.

It was a relief when the drizzle started. Akane and Nabiki both pulled out umbrellas in response. For her part, Shiho continued walking forward, ignoring the rain. She wanted to be obviously wet when she reached the school.

The sprinkles of water still filled the air when the gates of Furinkan came into view, revealing the audience waiting therein. The crowd of bows was visibly milling about in the courtyard, irrespective of the weather.

It was time to begin the performance.

"Is that them?" Shiho asked. She pointed at the mob of boys standing in the courtyard.

"Yes. That is them. Ranma-kun," Akane said stiffly and loudly.

Shiho regretted not having spent more of the time with Akane practicing her part. Still, most people didn't pay too much attention to how people acted in general, and the rain would help mask the anomalies.

"Here, hold this," Shiho said. She shrugged off her backpack, tossed it to Akane, and advanced in an overtly threatening manner. She shouted, "My name is Ranma Saotome of the Saotome School of Anything Goes Martial Arts!" She pointed at Akane. "Akane-chan is my fiancee!" She pointed at the crowd. "And you are going to pay for making her suffer." She lowered her stance into one of the positions she had learned from Genma. "Come at me, if you dare!"

The boys looked at each other in hesitation, but none of them moved.

Shiho held on to the hope that maybe her bluff would hold. Once her engagement was known, it would dissuade all the boys from bothering Akane. Shiho could leave and call her job complete. Her weeks of training would have been wasted, but that was the best possible outcome she could imagine.

"I see. Now I understand." Shiho couldn't see who had spoken, but the boy's voice was strong enough to carry over both the distance and the dampening effect of the rain. "You must be the reason why the fair Akane Tendo cannot show her love for me."

The crowd continued to muddle around without any obvious direction.

"Free the fair Akane-kun from her wretched fate! Attack!" the boy shouted.

That broke the spell.

The mob moved slowly at first, but it gained momentum until it was charging at Shiho with all the noise and frenzy she had seen in the past.

"Oh! No! Ranma-kun! Don't beat them up too hard!" Akane shouted.

It was almost good that Shiho was distracted by the imminent fight so she couldn't linger on what Akane had said.

Shiho's eyes tracked the opponents. First would be the boy wearing boxing gloves on the right. Immediately thereafter, the large boy in the keikogi on the left would try to grab her. Next, the boy with the baseball jersey would dive at her.

Two seconds later, the battle was joined. The boy with the boxing gloves jabbed forward with his right fist, and Shiho used the moment to dance to his side and jab an elbow into his face. She twisted to the left, abruptly changing her movement, such that the boy in the keikogi only grabbed at the empty air she had just vacated. She punched out with all her might, knocking him back, and she used the momentum to jump over the boy diving at her.

She reacted with the reflexive familiarity of dozens of drills, and each of her partners played their roles perfectly.

In the end, Shiho was surrounded by the fallen bodies of the boys while she herself was entirely unscathed. She was also desperately gasping for air while simultaneously doing everything she could to hide that fact. There was still one more person to go before she could declare victory. She just hoped that she would be ready for it.

"Such a feeble effort," Kuno said from the other side of the courtyard, confirming it had been his voice Shiho had heard earlier. "Truly none of them are worthy." He was once again wearing his white uwagi and dark hakama, which was much more intimidating when viewed across the field of battle. "I see the duty falls to me." He readied his boken in an aggressive stance pointed at Shiho. "Know that you face Tatewaki Kuno, the Blue Thunder of Furinkan High. I will defeat you and force you to renounce your engagement."

It appeared Shiho would not have the very much needed minute to catch her breath. The climax was upon her. She said, "So you're the jerk behind this all. I just got to beat you to get this all to stop, huh? Sounds easy enough. You face Ranma Saotome of the Saotome School of Anything Goes Martial Arts." She once again readied her stance. "I accept your challenge!"

"You fiend! Have at you!" Kuno charged forward. Or rather, he sprinted forward, crossing the courtyard in what felt like the blink of an eye.

Just like she had in her practice with Akane under Genma's watchful instruction, Shiho bided her time. When Kuno was approximately three steps away, she feinted to her right. As expected, Kuno slashed in the same direction, and Shiho dodged to the left to take advantage of it. Before she could raise her leg to snap a kick at his face, though, Kuno pivoted and swiped around with his boken to slash towards Shiho.

"Such pitiful technique!" Kuno shouted.

Shiho flinched away, escaping the blow so closely that she could imagine the wind of the strike brushing her face. She continued back, springing off her hands and flipping away as a gymnast might, in order to get some space.

This was very bad, to say the least. She was now off script. She frantically thought what she could do next, trying to improvise as Genma had suggested she do in these circumstances.

But Kuno didn't give her any time. He charged forward once again, shouting, "I will never accept your relationship to Akane-kun!" He slashed down, and it was all Shiho could do to dodge to the side. The wall behind her was much less lucky, and the brick was cleaved by his boken as if it were no more substantial than a bank of snow.

"An opening!" Kuno shouted. He twisted, his boken slicing through the wall as easily as it had before, and he swung right at Shiho's head.

Shiho reflexively, desperately raised her right arm in front of her face and braced for impact.

The dull crack was as quiet and as prominent as her pager pinging in the middle of the school welcoming ceremony. It filled her ears, and indeed her whole body. Kuno followed through, smashing into her ribs and sending her flying through the air. The next impact was of her back against a tree before she finally crumpled down in a heap.

Shiho's vision was filled with a faded, gray haze, but she forced herself to move and to get her bearings. She was sure her elbow was supposed to bend in the other direction. Her wrist, too, looked entirely unnatural, turned until it was nearly flat against her forearm. Obviously both of those joints hurt, but curiously, it was more in an intellectual and abstract way than in overt and overwhelming way.

"Ranma-kun!" Akane and Nabiki both shouted. They ran forward towards Shiho.

Kuno swiped his boken so the tip of it pointed at Shiho's face. He said, "You are defeated, and that means the beautiful Akane Tendo is mine!" He dropped his boken and held both of his arms wide open as he ran towards the approaching Akane. "Come to me, my..."

Akane barely broke her stride to kick Kuno across the courtyard.

Meanwhile, Nabiki crouched down at Shiho's side. She said, "This is bad. This is real bad. We got to get you to a doctor."

Shiho tried to use her left hand to try to push herself up, but it wasn't very effective.

"Akane!" Nabiki shouted.

"Help get her on my back," Akane said. She squatted down while Nabiki lifted Shiho by her shoulder and flopped her over.

Akane grabbed Shiho's two legs in her arms and started running, Nabiki right beside her.

"Doctor Tofu's clinic is only a few blocks away. You'll be fine. You'll see," Akane said.

"It's not over yet," Shiho said. She could feel cold sweat beading on her face, and she found she was gasping with short breaths.

Two blocks later, the intellectual knowledge that she was in pain transformed into a visceral one. Her arm felt like it was being sawed off by a dull razor blade, and her ribs felt like they were tearing through her gut. It was all she could do to focus on her shallow breathing, and each painful jolt after painful jolt as Akane ran forward only caused things to escalate higher and higher.

"Tofu-sensei!" The shout sounded faint, like a distant cry over the roar of a waterfall.

"Nabiki-chan? What's wrong?"

"Ranma-kun needs help."

Shiho found herself flopped down onto a hard bed of some sort.

"What happened?"

"Ranma-kun fought Kuno-senpai. Can you help?"

"Hmm..."

A man's hand grabbed Shiho's, and the sudden jolt of pain eclipsed everything she had felt thus far.

She screamed.

It impossibly managed to grow yet worse when he wrenched her arm out of its socket and punched it with a fist.

Shiho screamed again.

He then struck Shiho's back with an open-palm strike, sending her jolting forward by half a meter.

Shiho managed to hold her cry in this time, and limit herself to a cry of, "Oww!"

"How does that feel?" the man asked.

"It feels..." Shiho shouted. She turned to stare at the man, and then notice she was able to. She patted her chest and found things were settled there. Her arm, too, seemed mobile again. There was a trace of lingering soreness, but it no worse than after her training sessions with Genma. She was amazed.

In a more normal voice, Shiho said, "It feels okay."

"Don't do anything stressful for the next two days. You need to give your joints a chance to heal," the man, presumably Tofu, said. He was fairly young, maybe in his late 20s. Like so many other people Shiho had met since taking the Tendo job, he wore a martial arts keikogi. "Now what happened?"

Now that Shiho wasn't practically blinded with pain, she had a chance to better take in her surroundings. The bed she had been dropped onto was simple wooden one with a thin mattress. Around her was what appeared to be a hybrid of a medical clinic and a massage parlor. It definitely wasn't a hospital, given the homely ambiance and non-sterilized feel of it, but it looked like it was trying to be one. There were several cabinets along the walls filled with bottles, a skeleton hanging near the door, and a characteristic medicinal smell in the air.

"I got into a fight with Kuno-san," Shiho said.

"Why would you do that?" Tofu asked.

"To protect Akane-chan's honor," Shiho said.

Tofu looked Shiho up and down as intently as Genma had when they had first met. He said, "Really? If anything, it looks like she should the one fighting to protect you."

"I'm the heir of the Saotome School of Anything Goes Martial Arts," Shiho said. "I don't need anybody's protection."

Tofu remained seated, but he turned to Akane. He asked, "What's really going on here?"

Akane blushed and looked down. She said, "It's... uhh... Ranma-kun... I mean..."

"She's a P.A.," Nabiki said.

Shiho's heart jumped, and the corresponding surge of electricity jolted through her arms to the tips of her fingers. It was always a panic-inducing moment of shock whenever her character was broken and her real identity was exposed on the job. She had to consciously remind herself that it was the client who was doing the revelation, so it wasn't a problem, but that didn't prevent the effects she felt.

Tofu turned to look at Nabiki. He asked, "What's that?"

"A private actress," Nabiki said.

After a few seconds of silence, Tofu asked, "What's a private actress?"

The few seconds of respite were enough for Shiho to regain herself. She decided it would be easiest if she were to answer his question herself. She had had a great deal of practice doing so, after all.

"A private actress is what it exactly sounds like. Some actresses perform for the public, in movies and in theaters. A private actress performs privately, for people in ordinary life," Shiho said.

"I had heard that Akane-chan was engaged," Tofu said. "Is that this?"

"That's right," Akane blurted out. "It's not really real. I'm not really engaged. You know?"

"We hired her to play at being Akane's fiance," Nabiki said.

"Why would you do something like that?" Tofu asked. He looked back and forth, addressing both Akane and Nabiki.

Akane's gaze wandered around as she said, "Some of my classmates have been bothering me. We were thinking if they thought I had a fiance, they would leave me alone."

"I'm supposed to be Ranma Saotome, the heir of the Saotome School of Anything Goes Martial Arts," Shiho said. It was a simple declaration, very different than the boastful bravado of Ranma.

Tofu turned to Shiho and said, "That's really irresponsible. You can't do that."

"Sure I can. I can play any role, if you pay me," Shiho said. She spoke with the confidence of known fact, as unassuming and assured as saying that Nerima was in Tokyo.

"I'm sure you can, but acting as a martial artist is very different than being a martial artist," Tofu said. He met Shiho's eyes, fixing his gaze upon her. "Do you have idea how dangerous this is?"

Shiho met his eyes and stared back just as intently. She said, "It doesn't matter. A good P.A. is willing to put her life on the line for a job." That was not an idle boast, either. It was not infrequent that she was called upon to replace a person in a life-threatening situation. She had been kidnapped, shot at, run down by a car, shoved off a fourth-story balcony, and numerous other more harrowing incidents.

"Maybe, but a good doctor ensures his patients' health comes first," Tofu said. He turned his gaze at Akane and then Nabiki. "You two need to put a stop to this, right now."

"Sorry," Akane and Nabiki both said.

"Don't apologize to me. Apologize to her. She's the one whose life you put at risk," Tofu said.

"Sorry," Akane and Nabiki said again. They both bowed to Shiho.

Classes in St. Maria were effectively the same as they always were. There were the casual greetings from Shiho's classmates, the teachers going on and on about whatever subject they were the expert in, and the floating gossip which was ever-present in a girls' school. The only real evidence that the day before had happened were the hints twinging in Shiho's wrist and ribs, and those felt more like she had slept in a weird direction the previous night.

Nevertheless, she couldn't shake the ominous feeling of foreboding. It hovered in the air, lingering throughout the day. Like a gray sky and blustering wind foreshadowing an incoming typhoon, Shiho knew that something big and bad was about to happen. The only question was when. It wasn't during the morning announcements, nor during the lunch break, nor during the afternoon classes. Each of those went through without incident as the minutes ticked by extra slowly.

Shiho's pager finally beeped at her on the way to the bus station after classes had ended.

The quiet noise was much less conspicuous on the sidewalk in front of a convenience store than it was in the middle of a school hallway. Nobody bothered to take notice of her as she pushed the button acknowledging her receipt of the message.

It was certain that the page was in regard to the Tendo contract. Tofu's warning loomed large in its presence, and Akane and Nabiki's penitence in the face of his scolding made the outcome all but assured.

Shiho looked around, spotted a nearby payphone, and went into the booth. It was time to hear the sentencing.

"Hello," the secretary's voice answered Shiho's phone call. "Hi Ao Production Company. How may I help you?"

"This is Shiho. I got a page?"

"Kobayakawa-san?" the secretary asked. "One moment please. The boss would like to speak with you."

There was a quiet click on the phone, and then the boss said, "Hello? Shiho-san?"

"I'm here."

"Good," the boss said. "We got a call from Tendo-san today. They're terminating the contract."

Despite being expected, the statement still felt like a physical blow to her chest. Shiho sighed in response.

The boss said, "Don't be disappointed. They paid fully, and Tendo-san added an extra bonus on top of it as an apology. They're happy with your performance, and the next time they have a job, they promised they'd think of us first. The only reason they're canceling is that they decided this job was too dangerous, and they want to pursue a different path."

"Thanks," Shiho said. It was a mechanical response, only said because it was the right thing to say.

"Take a few days break. You've earned them," the boss said. "Bye."

Shiho hung up the phone.

And she fumed.

She felt angry.

She felt humiliated.

She felt worthless.

The Tendos had hired her to stop the attacks on Akane, and she had failed to do that. It was the first time she had ever failed a client, and that was an insult she could not abide. She charged a premium for her services, and her honor demanded that her clients get what they paid for.

Such a situation could not be allowed to stand.

The question was what could she do about it?

As unwelcome as Tofu's assertion had been, Shiho was inclined to believe it. She couldn't defeat Kuno in combat. Despite the distorting effects of adrenalin and first-person excitement, she was absolutely certain that Kuno had moved more quickly and sharply than he had in any of the videos. It was the fastest she had ever seen anybody move in her life.

Moreover, upon thinking about it, she wasn't even sure what defeating him would accomplish. Akane already beat him up day after day after day, but thus far, that had failed to stop the attacks. It was possible that one more thrashing would be the final one to end things, but that was doubtful at best.

But if violence was not the solution, then what was? Shiho had absolutely no idea.

And that was when it struck her. That lack of knowledge in and of itself was the key.

She had had it all wrong.

It was true that the Tendos were her clients, but they was only that. They were not her audience. The ones she had to convince were all the attacking boys. More precisely, it was Kuno. From how he had lingered behind them and how had he spurred them on, it was clear that he was the leader of the group. If she could convince him, that would bring the attacks to an end.

However, that led to the next issue. She had no idea how to go about convincing Kuno to stop. In fact, she knew almost nothing about him: he was the son of the school principal, he had some interest in Akane, he practiced kendo, and he was politically connected. That was useful information as far as it went, but it was a far way from being enough to craft a compelling performance for him.

That was clearly a problem. However, it was one she knew exactly how to go about solving.

Last Updated: November 14, 2021

Chapter Text

Chapter 4: Conclusion

Among all of the invisible people in the world, maids and janitors were some of the most invisible. Despite their easy access to so many intimate places, everybody constantly overlooked them. That made them the first roles Shiho thought to use whenever she wanted to conduct surveillance. In this case, infiltrating a large residence, a maid would be perfect.

Adopting the change was simplicity itself. The uniform was a must. She additionally put on some conspicuously heavy makeup, tied her hair up in a ponytail, and donned a pair of glasses. Most importantly, she changed her posture and bearing to one of an experienced employee resigned to do whatever needed to be done. Then it was as easy as casually joining the small collection of women walking into the Kuno estate. There was only the smallest moment of confusion before they welcomed her into their midsts; Shiho acted like she belonged there, so everybody else acted like she belonged there.

The Kuno estate was huge. There were imposing walls, a courtyard which rivaled Furinkan High School's, and multiple large buildings spread around the enclosure. There was an huge greenhouse on one side, and there was what appeared to be a tropical beach on the other. The main building itself put all that to shame, though, towering as large and as proud as Osaka Castle.

Shiho kept up with the other maids as they rushed through the open grounds and into the house proper. It was only when they were inside that they slowed down and split up, by unspoken agreement subdividing the tasks between them. Shiho didn't understand the system, but as long as she appeared to be doing work, she expected it would be fine.

Nominally, Shiho joined the others in scrubbing, dusting, sorting, and doing all of the other duties expected of a maid. However, what she was really doing was looking around to see what she could discover about Kuno.

The master bedroom was easy to identify due to its size and its layout. Interestingly, it also appeared to be unoccupied. The bed was tightly tucked, and a light layer of dust covered everything. Shiho took a quick minute to brush up the area before moving on.

The second bedroom Shiho found at least looked like it was being used. However, she only gave it a cursory examination. The clothing and the rhythmic gymnastic equipment strongly suggested that it was a girl's room. If Shiho became desperate, she would search it, that was only if she became desperate.

The third bedroom was where Shiho really began her investigations in earnest. The moment she stepped into it, she was confronted by what appeared to be a shrine to Akane. There was a large poster of her on the wall, and several photographs of a similar nature surrounded it.

In addition to the shrine, the room also contained various kendo gear, which further suggested that this was the right place to look. A matched pair of swords, one long and one short, were set on a stand beside the shrine. There was no armor on display, but the layout made its absence feel strikingly conspicuous.

On the other side of the room were a large number of books. Most of them were treatises on the various shogunate governments and dramas featuring samurai protagonists. The lack of any nearby dust made it clear that they were frequently read and reread.

Several art prints could be found around the room as well. There was an image of Tomoe Gozen, the famous female warrior of the Genpei war, and an image of Yoritomo Minamoto, the founder of the Kamakura shogunate.

Her examination, and associated perfunctory dusting, was interrupted when Kuno himself walked into the room. His appearance gave Shiho a brief moment of panic, but she masked it by deeply bowing to the boy, the demure act of a maid greeting her employer helping as much as her heavy makeup did in obscuring her face. In turn, he played his role perfectly, barely giving her a glance before dropping his school bag onto the floor.

Shiho stepped out of the room, just as invisible as before. Rather than escape, though, she continued to loiter around the area, giving the nearby hallways an apparently deep and slow cleaning. Her intention was to follow behind Kuno once he left to see where he went. However, she was foiled in her efforts by the fact that he never left.

She spent a full hour wiping and re-wiping cracks and crevices before she gave up. Kuno had yet to move from his position of meditation in front of the poster of Akane, to the point that she wondered if he had fallen asleep, and she could only clean a table so many times became it became suspicious. It was time to move on.

Shiho spent the next hour cleaning the rest of the house, such as to not make the target of her surveillance obvious. It also gave her time to process what she had observed, just in case there was something else she should investigate while she still had the chance.

Clearly Kuno had an obsession with Akane as grand, pervasive, and corrosive as Shylock's hatred of Antonio. Unlike "The Merchant of Venice," though, there was no Duke to appeal to in order to bring the situation to a resolution. It appeared that Portia would need to take a very different approach to get him to stop.

Shiho was still considering this when she eventually joined the maids in making her escape. Once outside again, she waited a few blocks before bidding the others farewell and splitting away, disappearing as obviously and as unnoticed as the wind.

A girl in her late teens answered Shiho's knock at the Tendo home. She had long hair, she wore an apron over her dress, and she bore a strong resemblance to Akane and Nabiki. She said, "Good evening."

"Good evening. Are Soun Tendo-san, Nabiki-san, and Akane-san here?" Shiho asked.

"Yes, come in," the girl said. She stepped to the side of the doorway to make some space. "Father, Nabiki-chan, Akane-chan, you have a visitor."

Shiho entered the house proper. She waited until the door behind her had fully closed before she took off her scarf, sunglasses, and wide-brimmed hat.

In many ways, the Tendo home was like the Saotome home, only much bigger. It was maybe twice as large, and that wasn't including the substantial, attached building to the side of the property. Despite its size, the inside was still characterized by plain plaster walls, wooden floors, and the occasional sparse decoration scattered on the tables.

The girl led Shiho into the living room, where Soun was already present.

"Ranma-kun, I mean Kobayakawa-san, what are you doing here?" Soun asked.

"I know how to get everybody to stop attacking Akane-san," Shiho said.

"You do? How?" Akane asked from the hallway. She, along with Nabiki, continued to approach until they had fully entered the living room.

Shiho turned to face Akane. She said, "Kuno-san fancies himself as Yoritomo Minamoto. If we can convince him he's more Tessan Aoyama, that should make him stop."

"Who's that?" Akane asked.

It was obvious that Akane would know Yoritomo Minamoto's name, so Shiho explained who the other person was. "Tessan is the villain of the 'Banchou Sarayashiki' legend. The story is that he wanted a woman, Okiku, to become his mistress. When she refused, he had her killed and thrown into a well. Thereafter, her ghost tormented him for ages."

"Oh, my," the girl wearing the apron said.

Akane shuddered.

"That's bleak," Nabiki said.

Shiho nodded. She said, "It's a cautionary tale as much as anything. If we can get Kuno-san to realize he's acting that dishonorably, then he'll stop."

"That's a nice theory, but what makes you think it'll work?" Nabiki asked.

"Don't you remember what he said?" Shiho asked. It had taken the visit to the Kuno estate to give her the context to properly weigh them, but in hindsight, everything had been plain in the boy's words.

"Who, Kuno-chan? He said something?" Nabiki asked. She looked at Akane, who shook her head back in return. "When?"

"Right before my fight with him," Shiho said.

Nabiki scoffed. She said, "That? He's always blathering on and on like that. It doesn't mean anything. It's just nonsense."

"No, it isn't," Shiho said. She automatically adopted the cadence and posture of Kuno. "'Free the fair Akane-kun from her wretched fate!' 'I see the duty falls to me.' I will defeat you and force you to renounce your engagement.'" She resumed a more normal way of speaking. "You see? It's obvious that he pictures himself as the honorable protector of Akane-san. If his actions were instead dishonorable, then he'll stop."

Akane overtly sighed. She said, "That's your big idea? It's the same thing we hired you to do in the first place, and we saw how well that worked."

"No, it isn't," Shiho said, causing Akane and the others to sharply look at her. "You hired me to be your fiance. That's very different."

"What do you mean?" Akane asked.

"Your being engaged is related, yes, but it's only a tangent to the main point," Shiho said. "There's a common motif in samurai lore of a samurai rescuing a distressed damsel from an impossible situation. If Akane-san were trapped in an engagement, that fits right into that. And the more trapped Akane-san is, the more it spurs Kuno-san on. What we need to do is to change the story. Even more common in samurai mythology is the idea of a samurai trying to balance his duty against his desires. There are countless stories of the honorable samurai needing to ignore the allure of some temptation, or of him debasing himself and it leading to a disastrous ending. If we can change him to that world view, then everything will fall into place."

Akane, Nabiki, and Soun all exchanged looks. Akane then asked, "Okay. If that's true, then how do we convince him of that?"

"It's simple," Shiho said. She looked straight at Akane. "You need to convince him that you aren't trapped in this engagement. You need to convince him that you love Ranma Saotome and that you are eagerly looking forward to marriage."

"What?" Akane nearly shouted.

"In the stories, the woman's opinion is of paramount important. If the woman secretly loves the samurai, than it's the samurai's duty to save her. If the woman is happy with how things are for her, then it's the samurai's duty to resist that temptation."

"I guess that makes sense," Akane said. She still sounded tentative. "But how am I supposed to do that?"

"We do what we did before, but this time, you are the star of the show, not me. You need to put a stop to the fight and declare your love for Ranma," Shiho said.

"No!" Akane's face flushed a bright red. "No, no, no!"

The forceful shout startled Shiho. She asked, "What's wrong?"

Akane's hands flailed around. She asked, "In front of the whole school? No way!"

"Why not?" Nabiki asked. A grin came to her face. "You've done it before, don't you remember?"

As impossible as it it seemed, her blush intensified even more. She shouted, "No I didn't!"

"Yes you did," Nabiki said. Her grinned broadened. "Don't you remember when you confessed how much you loved Kugimiya-san?"

"Oh, you were so cute as Romeo," the girl wearing the apron said. Her smile seemed much more natural and benign than Nabiki's.

"Are you talking about that school play? When we were kids? This and that are totally different!" Akane shouted. "I shouldn't need to explain that to you."

Shiho pieced the fragments together. It sounded like Akane had played Romeo in a staging of "Romeo and Juliet." It wasn't the most common thing ever, but it wasn't unheard of for a girl to play a boy's part.

"How is that different?" Shiho asked.

"That was just a performance," Akane said.

"And this is also just a performance," Shiho said. It was a performance for people who weren't aware it was being staged, but it was still acting.

"No," Akane said. She vigorously shook her head. "It's different, and different is different."

Shiho sighed. It was ultimately up to Akane, and if she didn't want to go any further, than Shiho wasn't going to try to force her to. It was always the prerogative of the client to leave the engagement. It was still a disappointment to leave the Tendo's situation unresolved, but in this case, her honor was satisfied. She had already gone far above what could reasonably be expected.

"I see," Shiho said. "In that case, I'm sorry to have bothered you all. I hope you will consider using the Hi Ao Production Company the next time you are in need of any acting services. Good evening." She bowed.

"What?" Akane asked. "You're leaving?"

Shiho raised up again and said, "Yes. You've already ended the contract, so there's no more job here. I only came because I thought you wanted to end the morning fights, but if you don't want to." She shrugged. It was their choice to abandon the situation, not hers. "Goodbye."

"Wait," Akane said. She hesitated, her face growing red once again. And she hesitated further. Then she said, "Okay. Fine. We can try what you said. What do I need to do?"

A whiplash of mood hit Shiho. It was a mixed blessing at best. She wanted to continue her success rate, but this would also be more work for her, and unpaid work at that. Still, pride was what it was, and she had already made her decision even before she had entered the Kuno estate.

"Okay," Shiho said. She clapped her hands together, like a director beginning a new production. "Give me your best line. Tell me you love me."

"Here?" Akane asked. Then, louder, "Now?"

"Sure. Why not?" Shiho asked.

"But... there's everybody here," Akane said. She looked around at Soun, Nabiki, and the girl wearing the apron.

"Yes?" Shiho asked.

"I... I can't do it in front of everybody," Akane said. Her face was blushing again.

Shiho's face scrunched up in confusion. She asked, "You do realize that you're going to have to do this in front of the whole school, right?"

Akane's blush further intensified. She said in a quiet voice, "Yes, but can't we... you know... work up to it or something?"

"I guess," Shiho said. Stage fright was a common experience, but she had never of rehearsal fright before. The inauspicious start very much worried her. "Where do you want to start?"

"I guess we can go to the dojo," Akane said. She then turned to the everybody else in the room and shouted, "And none of you listen in!"

There was nothing in the large, spacious, wooden dojo to block any sound, and the traditional, paper-like doors clearly only provided minimal insulation. Regardless, Akane did seem more comfortable inside as compared to when she had been in the Tendo house. That was only a relative evaluation, though. On an absolute scale, Akane was still doing poorly.

It was like the rehearsals for a class play, only far worse. In those, the girls would likewise need to have their lines prompted, but at least they could actually say them. In contrast, Shiho was making practically no progress at all with Akane.

"I," Shiho said.

"I," Akane said. Her voice felt stilted.

"Love," Shiho said.

"L..ove..." Akane said. A warble joined her stilted words.

"You," Shiho said.

"Y..y..ou..." Akane said. The warble progressed to a full stammer.

"I love you," Shiho said.

"I.. I... I can't do it," Akane said.

"Why not?" Shiho asked. As much as she wanted to be understanding, she was frustrated. Over the past hour, they had glimpsed only the most minor touches of progress.

"It's just too... ugh..." Akane said. She squirmed her body back and forth.

"What is 'ugh?'"

"It's... embarrassing..."

Shiho sighed. Working with amateurs was always so difficult.

"Here," Shiho said. She took Akane's arm, pulled her over to a corner of the dojo, and turned her to face it. "Now, try saying it."

"At the wall?" Akane asked.

"At nothing at all," Shiho said. "To begin with. We can work up from there."

"I love..." Akane trailed off into silence again.

"Ugh..." Shiho mussed up her hair in frustration.

They continued to practice for another hour after that, but they met with as little success as they had had over the course of the previous hour. It wasn't useless as such, but it was the nearest thing to it.

An almost palpable gloom haunted the Tendo Dojo as Shiho left Akane behind for the evening. Despite how impossible it was for Shiho to beat Kuno in a fight, it was increasingly looking like the preferable option. It had become obvious that their current approach was fundamentally flawed, and Shiho spent the rest of the night trying to think of a different one.

Shiho was tentatively optimistic upon returning to the Tendo home. She had brought a secret weapon with her, courtesy of the Hi Ao Production Company.

She was welcome into the house by the girl with the apron, who introduced herself as Kasumi, the eldest sister of the family. Kasumi proceeded to lead Shiho to the dojo, where Akane was already waiting inside, and then left the two of them alone. Akane's balled up fists and gritted teeth made it look like she was preparing to enter a martial arts tournament.

"I thought we'd try something different today," Shiho said. She dropped her bag on the ground and knelt over it.

"What's that?" Akane asked. She moved forward to watch as Shiho opened the bag.

Shiho pulled out a copy of the script and handed it towards Akane. She asked, "You played Romeo before, right? I thought we'd try that today." There were several scenes in which Romeo professed his love to Juliet throughout the play. It wasn't perfect, but it would at least give them something to work with.

Akane did not take the offered script. She said, "Oh no. Absolutely not!"

"Huh?" Shiho asked.

Akane stood with her hand aggressively pointed at Shiho's face. She said, "No way I'm doing that."

"Why not?"

"I hate acting!"

Shiho was taken aback, and it took her a second to recollect her wits in the face of Akane's forceful attack. She held up her hands in surrender. "Okay, okay."

It had seemed like a promising idea, but it was obvious she had misinterpreted the situation. Akane's hatred of acting did help explain why she was so bad at it, though. Or maybe her lack of ability explained her hatred. Regardless, having Akane act out the various love scenes in the play was clearly a non-starter.

Shiho tossed the script on top of the costumes in her bag, and she resigned herself to what needed to be done. "In that case, I guess we should go back to the practice we were doing before."

Akane's anger immediately melted away, replaced by the awkward embarrassment from the day before. Practice went much the same way as well, with Akane's confident declarations once again turning into hesitant and tentative stutters. Their long evening was quickly interrupted, though, when the door to the dojo opened. The noise caused Akane to shout and jump to face it.

"Onee-chan! What are you doing here?"

"Is that any way to greet your sister?" Nabiki asked. She had a tray in her hands upon which were some cups and snacks.

"That isn't an answer to my question," Akane said.

Nabiki peered around the room intently. She said, "Is it so strange to be hospitable to a guest?"

"For you? Yes," Akane said. "You're just trying to eavesdrop, aren't you?"

"I come all this way to bring you some refreshments only to be accused. You wound me. I'm just trying to help," Nabiki said. She put the tray down next to Shiho's bag and then picked up the script from it. "What's this? You finally managed to convince somebody to let you play Juliet?"

Shiho's actress senses were prickling and insistent. It was like when a supposed race car driver went through an entire event without once approaching the showroom. They weren't wrong as such, but Nabiki's actions certainly felt artificial and suspicious. It gave Shiho pause, trying to figure out what to make of it.

Akane had expressed how unusual Nabiki's was behaving, which presumably meant that Nabiki was acting that way for a specific reason. She had intently looked around before directly highlighting the script Shiho had brought. And she had mentioned Juliet by name, which was a very arbitrary statement to make in the already conspicuous situation. Presumably that was what drove her presence here.

Shiho made the intuitive leap. She turned to Akane and asked, "You want to play Juliet, don't you?"

"Huh?" Akane asked.

Nabiki nodded. She said, "That's right. Akane's been wanting to play Juliet since forever."

"Onee-chan!" Akane shouted. Her face started to flush red again. "That's normal, isn't it?" Akane asked, both louder and and more forcefully than ordinary conversation would have considered polite. "It's every girl's dream to play Juliet."

Shiho rolled her eyes in annoyance. She asked, "Then why didn't you just say so? You can do Juliet's part then. I'll say Romeo's lines. It's better that way, anyway." She took the script from Nabiki and handed it to Akane.

Akane took the script and threw it back onto the bag. She said, "I don't need it."

"Oh?" Shiho asked.

Akane took on a stereotypical, melodramatic pose, her right hand clutched to her chest and her left arm extended forward. "O Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo?"

Shiho mentally skimmed through the play. She had planned on rehearsing the start of it, when Romeo declares his love for a girl, but if Akane was going to be reciting Juliet's part instead, it required a different focus. She confirmed that the famous balcony scene was as good as any, and better than most.

"That's pretty good," Shiho said. It certainly was, compared to Akane's previous efforts. "Can you do the whole thing?"

"You asked for it now," Nabiki said. She shook her head and left the room.

"Easy," Akane said. She emoted an extended arm again. "O Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo? Deny thy father, and refuse thy name. Or if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love, and I’ll no longer be a Capulet."

"Shall I hear more, or shall I speak at this?" Shiho said, reciting Romeo's line.

Akane continued, "Tis but thy name that is my enemy..."

As they progressed through the scene, Shiho grew progressively more comfortable. Akane's performance was far from great, but considering the lack of preparation, it was as good as Shiho would have expected from an amateur. Most importantly, it had none of the fumbling nonsense that Akane had stuttered through for all of the day before.

"Would’st thou withdraw it? For what purpose, love?" Shiho asked.

"But to be frank and give it thee again. And yet I wish but for the thing I have; my bounty is as boundless as the sea, my love as deep; the more I give to thee, the more I have, for both are infinite. I hear some noise within. Dear love, adieu," Akane said.

Shiho gave a robust clap in response. There was definitely something here she could work with. She shouted, "There! Like that!"

The blush on Akane's face had been replaced by a proud smile.

The entire Tendo family had gathered in the dining room. Soun was sitting at the table there. To his left was Nabiki, and to his right was Kasumi. On the other side of the table sat Akane and Shiho.

"You don't understand. I love Ranma-kun," Akane said. Her voice was plaintive and longing. "I can't stand to see him hurt again. Please."

Nabiki crossed her arms and leaned back from the table. She asked, "Since when?"

"Ever since the moment I first saw him," Akane said. She glanced furtively towards Shiho. "It was destiny. I just knew that Ranma-kun would be the one for me. This is my duty, but it is so much more than that. It's my dream, too. Please, do not destroy it."

"That's nice," Kasumi said. She had a benign smile on her face.

"Hmm..." Soun crossed his arms in front of him.

Nabiki had a not-quite grimace frozen on her face.

Shiho felt closer to Nabiki's expression than to Kasumi's. She had lost count of the number of times Akane had confessed her love, and while she had improved immeasurably, something ineffable was still off.

"It's still not quite right. Something's missing," Shiho said.

Akane eager demeanor vanished, and she slumped over. She turned her head to Shiho and asked, "Like what?"

"I don't know. It's fine, but it just feels flat. Nothing really stands out," Shiho said. Upon saying that, she realized what was missing. "A climax. It needs a climax, something that will stick in their memory and stay with them."

Nabiki nodded. She said, "I think that's right. Something like... a kiss."

Akane jolted upright and shouted, "A kiss? You want me to kiss her?"

"Oh my," Kasumi said. Her hand moved up to cover her mouth.

Shiho nodded. She said, "That could work. It's a pretty common way for a romance story to end, and it's a good way to emphasize how close we are."

Soun glared at Shiho and a growl could definitely be heard coming from him, but he didn't actually say anything.

"Absolutely not," Akane said. She slapped the palm of her hand on the table in front of her. "There's no way this is going to be my first kiss."

"First kiss?" Shiho asked. She was confused. "You didn't kiss when you did 'Romeo and Juliet?'" It was hard to imagine how that could have worked without any kissing.

"Oh," Akane said. She tapped a fist into her open palm. "We could do that."

"Do what?" Shiho asked.

"We used tape," Akane said.

"Tape? How?" Shiho asked. She didn't understand how tape fit into the conversation.

"Just tape over the mouth, so we don't really kiss. It's what we did in that play," Akane said. She pantomimed covering her mouth appropriately.

"Really?" Shiho asked. The idea sounded absolutely ridiculous.

It was easy to imagine hiding a strip of tape somewhere, but that was the only easy part. Distracting the audience from noticing the actress putting it on sounded implausible at best, and it was outright impossible that the audience wouldn't see it at some point before, during, or after the actual kiss. That was also entirely ignoring the obvious fact that the actress couldn't say anything while her mouth was taped shut.

"That sounds terrible," Shiho said.

"It's not that bad," Akane said.

"Yes, it is. In a theater play, it'd just look awful. In a real-life performance, it would ruin everything." Shiho swiped her hand back and forth, as if trying to fan away some dust. "It'd be better if we don't do anything at all than to try and do that."

"Then do you have any other ideas?" Akane asked.

Despite their best efforts, they weren't able to think of any other possible climaxes. In the end, they decided to just go forward regardless. Akane's performance wasn't bad as such. Shiho just hoped that not bad would be good enough.

It was another rainy morning when Shiho met up with Akane and Nabiki at the front of their house. She was dressed in an archaic, male kimono for the event, and she carried a prop katana and wakazashi on her waist. It was flamboyant to the point of caricature, but she thought it would be well received by the audience.

The three girls once again walked together to Nerima High School, and once again there was a mob of male students waiting in the courtyard. This time, though, rather than spur the crowd into action, Kuno emerged forward and confronted Shiho.

"You cur! You dare show your face here again, and in the company of the beautiful Akane-kun, no less." Kuno raised his boken to point at Shiho. "I see I have shown too much mercy. I shall not make that mistake a second time. You meet your end today!" He ran forward, boken poised and ready to strike.

"No! Stop!" Akane stepped forward and planted herself directly in his path, adopting a stereotypical position of screening with her arms spread out wide.

"What is this?" Kuno stopped as suddenly as he had started. "Step aside so that I may free you of your baleful burden."

"Thank you, Kuno-senpai, but you don't understand. This isn't a burden. You see, I love Ranma-kun. I can't stand the thought of seeing him hurt. Please," Akane said. The only hesitation in her voice was what could be expected from a troubled and torn girl trying to navigate a tricky situation. The real challenge would be coming up, though. They had tried to predict some of Kuno's most likely responses, but it was impossible to be certain what he would do next.

"What is this?" Kuno asked. He brandished his boken at Shiho. "Sorcerer! You have bewitched Akane-kun! It is the only explanation!"

Of the multitude of ideas they had planned and rehearsed for, magical sorcery was not one they had considered. They would need to improvise, which could be problematic for Akane.

Shiho stepped forward from behind Akane and tried to redirect the flow to a more comfortable one. She said, "Only as much as Akane-chan has bewitched me as well. Kuno-dono, please, allow me to explain, as one samurai to another. It's true that it started as an arrangement of our honorable fathers: a sacred oath between our warrior families that we would marry and merge our two schools of martial arts. However, it is so much more than that. I love Akane-chan with all my heart. This is not an obligation, or even a privilege. This is fate."

"For me as well," Akane said. "Ever since the moment I saw him, I knew Ranma-kun would be the one for me. Can you not see the red string which ties us together?" She held up her hand nearest to Shiho and showed off her little finger. "When you wound him, you wound me just as much. This is my duty, but it's so much more than that. This is my dream, too. Please, do not destroy it."

Kuno wavered. His boken slowly drooped to the ground. In contrast, the furrow on his brow grew and deepened, becoming so pronounced that it was visible across the entire courtyard.

Comprehension struck Kuno's face, and he re-raised the boken. He shouted, "This is a trick! It must be!" He released a hand from his boken and used it to point at Nabiki, who was walking along her diverted path to the side of the crowd. "You!"

"Me?" Nabiki asked. She stopped and pointed at herself.

Instantly, the crushing weight of realization struck Shiho. All of their preparations had been focused on Akane. They had completely forgotten that Nabiki would be around as well. Still, by this point, anything Shiho did to try to prompt her or remove her was bound to be suspicious or worse. There was nothing she could do but watch and hope.

"How can I help you, Kuno-chan?" Nabiki asked.

Kuno stalked over to her, and he pulled out a large stack of yen from his shirt. He handed the stack into Nabiki's waiting hand in a motion which was clearly well practiced on both sides.

"What's this for?" Nabiki asked. It didn't stop her from opening her book bag and placing the money inside it.

"The truth," Kuno said. He scowled at Nabiki.

"The truth?" Nabiki asked. "Well, since you asked so nicely, the truth is that they've been like this for weeks, ever since Ranma-kun showed up at the house."

Kuno frowned. He pulled out a larger stack of bills and handed them to Nabiki.

Nabiki placed them into her bag as well. "You should have heard Akane in the dojo. Night after night, repeating over and over how much she loved Ranma-kun."

"Did she..." Akane started saying. Then, in a louder voice, she shouted at Nabiki, "Were you listening in on me?"

Nabiki only gave a sidelong glance back at Akane. It prompted Akane to give a growl of frustration while the hint of a blush came to her cheeks.

"Lies!" Kuno roared. He took out a yet larger stack of bills.

Nabiki avidly took them. She said, "You know, a few days ago, Akane-chan called us all into the dining room. There, right in front of our father and sister, she confessed her love to Ranma-kun. She kept going on and on about how wonderful he was and how much she was looking forward to the day they were going to be married. Fate this and honor that. Honestly, it was kind of embarrassing."

"Onee-chan!" Akane shouted. Her blush had grown to be fully developed.

Nabiki shrugged back to Akane. She said, "Business is business. Are you willing to pay more?"

"I said I wanted the truth, you greedy woman! Now give me what I've paid for, or you'll never get a single yen from me again!" Kuno shouted.

"Kuno-chan, I'm telling you the truth. I'll swear it on anything you want me to. But, if you want me to tell you Akane hates Ranma-kun, I can do that, too. I'll tell you anything you want, if you pay me," Nabiki said. She held out her hand.

Kuno visibly grimaced, and his growl could be heard across the entire courtyard. He swiveled his head to face Shiho and shouted, "No! I refuse to believe it. It's a trick!"

Shiho thought frantically. They were at an impasse, and that was effectively a failure. It wasn't good enough to leave the situation in confusion. They needed to convince Kuno, and despite there best efforts, they had yet to do so. There had to be something she could do to tip the balance.

"Kuno-senpai!" Akane shouted. Her fists were clenched at her side. "Then how about this!" She reached over, grabbed Shiho's collar with both her hands, and yanked her close.

It was all the cue Shiho had. It was all she needed. So when Akane smashed her lips into Shiho's, Shiho pivoted to accept it adroitly. She used all her considerable experience to turn the tentative bumbling of a girl's first kiss into the most intimate, untoward, and certainly-not-platonic spectacle she possibly could given the circumstances.

An audible gasp filled the courtyard. The shrieks of several girls screaming could be heard in the distance.

"Or..." Nabiki said as the long kiss extended, "I can tell you how far they've gone. I don't think Father even knows that."

There was a wooden thunk of a boken hitting the ground.

Akane relaxed her grip, and Shiho drew back, finally able to resume breathing again.

"How's that, Kuno-senpai!"

Kuno's mouth was as slack and agape as the hands from which he had dropped his boken.

Shiho bowed deeply. "Kuno-dono, please. I beseech you. We both know you are the superior man. You are faster than me. Stronger than me. More skilled with with the sword than me. If you would take Akane-chan, then I would have no way of stopping you. Still, prove you have the honor to match your martial prowess. I beg of you, do not steal my life's love away from me."

Kuno growled again, his robust voice sounding like a passing train it its volume and tenor. He reached down and grabbed his boken.

"Fine!" Kuno's shout cracked like thunder throughout the wet courtyard. "I'll accept your engagement!" He posed as dramatically as any actor playing Hamlet ever did. "But if you ever make her cry, then you will rue the day that you crossed paths with Tatewaki Kuno!" The reverberation of his pronouncement lingered in the air.

"Of course I never will," Shiho said, bowing deeply once again. "Thank you very much."

"Thank you for understanding, Kuno-senpai," Akane said. She reached over and gave Shiho one more kiss. "Until later."

Shiho waited at the gate while Akane walked forward. The crowd parted for her and let her pass unchallenged. Shiho then turned away, satisfied with another job successfully completed.

Author's Notes:

First, a big disclaimer: I'm not at all confident of the veracity of the segments about samurai rescuing damsels in distress, and about the nature of a samurai's duty being influenced by the context of the woman's situation. I did fair bit of research, but I found surprisingly little on samurai love stories. Therefore I can't say it's wrong, but I likewise can't say that it's right. I do think it lines up with the common motif in general Japanese mythology of the conflicts of giri (obligation) and ninjou (human emotion), but I also think that it feels more like a 21st century paradigm than a 20th century one, let alone a 17th century or a 12th century one. If anybody out there knows, I'd welcome the opportunity learn more. Regardless, if needed, I hope you will accept this particular conceit.

With that disclaimer presented, let's talk about this story.

"Portia's Plan:" also known as "If Ranma Did Not Exist," " Prayer to Freya," "Chevalier d'Eon's Mirror," and "How Do You Solve a Problem like Kuno?" I had no shortage of potential titles for this story, each with their various positives or negatives. I ended up selecting "Portia's Plan" because it was most in alignment with how canon "P.A." titled chapters. The title itself references "The Merchant of Venice," and how Portia was a woman who dressed as a man in order to resolve one of the problems in that play.

I had begun this story because I specifically wanted to do something without Ranma Saotome. "Finding the Silver" follows Ranma in an entirely different setting than canonical "Ranma 1/2," and I had wanted to try doing the inverse of that. Additionally, I had had the impression that all my work focuses on Ranma as a main character. Since then I've gone back and checked, and that was an entirely incorrect impression, but it had been one of my motivations at the time.

As so frequently happens, this story evolved a great deal in the course of my writing it. The biggest change was in terms of structure. I had originally planned it as a standard three-act story. However, a few days before I had released the first chapter, I changed it to the four-act structure of Kishoutenketsu. That shift necessitated a great deal of rework, but in the end, I think it fit nicely.

The other major change was one of content. I had originally envisioned this story as being much larger than it is. In my original conception, I had pictured Shiho fighting Kuno to a standstill in that first confrontation, if not actually defeating him. This could have been done in a variety of comedy-slapstick ways, such as Kuno slashing open Shiho's shirt and the sight stunning him for a few moments. Subsequent to that fight, I had planned on redoing various canonical "Ranma 1/2" scenes in this different context, such as Shiho intentionally diving out of the third story window knowing there is a pool below, or the Tendos hiring another actor to act as Ryouga in a staged fight with Akane only pretending that the umbrella is extremely heavy.

However, when I got to the point of writing it, I didn't like how it felt. It would stretch plausibility in the extreme for Shiho to adopt a semi-permanent new identity for this job. (What happens long-term when "Shiho Kobayakawa" never graduates? If "Ranma Saotome" attends Furinkan, how long until somebody forces a demonstration of Jusenkyou?) Additionally, it also feels unfair to Kuno for him to be beaten in martial arts by a civilian. As such, I changed things so Shiho was decisively defeated in that first confrontation. Obviously that caused a substantial and pervasive change to the story.

Related to the point about changing story content, as can be inferred by the description of the original conception, for a long time I was stuck trying to figure out how the story should conclude. I had been picturing it as a "Ranma 1/2"-style escapade, with a situation appearing, hijinks occurring, and then the situation ending. However, I couldn't think of a good way for this situation to resolve, short of a "Shiho fails and leaves" type ending, which I did not like at all. I was discussing this with somebody else, and they mentioned that "this sounds like a 'problem of the day' in the 'P.A.' universe." I thought about it and realized that that was correct. When I changed the paradigm to be a 'P.A.'-style one, where a client comes to Shiho with problem and she subsequently solves it, it became much easier. Clearly the "problem" was Kuno, and so the most appropriate story conclusion would be solving that.

That being said, that does understate the difficulty of doing that. In my opinion, it's not at all obvious how the situation with Kuno could be resolved. For a long time, I had pictured a scene with Shiho threatening to perform seppuku, in the style of the film "Harakiri," and maybe her actually being willing to do it. However, it felt very melodramatic and like a cheap way out to me, given how much seppuku is used in stories to force issues. My breakthrough was when I realized this story could be a character arc for Akane. In canon, she is romantically shy and awkward, and having her develop into somebody who as more confident and decisive could be a nice arc in this story. Admittedly I do think canonically Akane is more angry-shy than the blushing-shy I used in this story, but I think it's close enough to be reasonable. Also, as a related bit of trivia, originally it had been Nabiki who had been the most prominent secondary character in this story. The change to focus to Akane brought with it a substantial increase in her role and an associated decrease of Nabiki's.

The final note I'll make about this story is its length, and especially its chapter length. I've noticed as time goes by that my chapter lengths seem to be growing larger and larger. I made a particular effort this time to keep them around 5000 words to see how it feels. I clearly succeeded, but I'm not entirely convinced they are better or worse than longer ones.

Anyway, that is one more story completed. Thank you for reading. I would love to hear what you thought of it. Regardless, do I hope you enjoyed it.

Last Updated: February 16, 2023