Chapter Text
Wei Wuxian is kicked awake in a dingy hovel, and his first thought is that reincarnation really isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. His second thought is that, honestly, he would have preferred to stay dead, anyway, because the dead don’t really think in terms of loss and grief, and now that he’s back, Wei Wuxian is remembering all his reasons for grief.
Dealing with the mystery of how he’s suddenly alive again and the price that’s been set for his return to life is much easier than dwelling on how his previous life ended, so that’s what Wei Wuxian does. Of course, his resolve not to think about everything he’s lost – wailing about it won’t bring anyone back, so what’s the point? Better to just keep moving, keep doing, and eventually, the pain will fade – is tested when he discovers that the visiting cultivators are from Gusu Lan.
They’re just juniors, and for all that Wei Wuxian knows that Gusu Lan trains its disciples very well, he knows they can’t have all that much experience going on night hunts. There doesn’t seem to be a senior disciple with them, so Wei Wuxian figures it’s probably only their first or second unsupervised night-hunt. He feels kind of sorry for them, because the fierce corpse arm isn’t something juniors should be expected to handle by themselves. Of course he’s going to help them, even if it’s difficult to do so without letting on that he’s helping them.
It’s easer to focus on the puzzle of it all than on how much he wishes he’d been able to see his own children grow up. It’s easier to focus on protecting these kids than on how he couldn’t do the same for his own. It’s almost like a game, and if he pretends hard enough, one day, he’ll manage to convince even himself that he’s having fun.
The sound of a guqin echoes through the night, and Wei Wuxian finds himself paralysed. He’d been doing such a good job not thinking about the past, but that single note and the joyful cry that goes up among the juniors has shattered all of his carefully constructed barriers. “Hanguang-Jun!” The one the others called Jingyi cries.
Lan Zhan.
How can Wei Wuxian possibly face Lan Zhan after everything? After his selfishness got their children killed? He can’t, is the answer. If he tries to look Lan Zhan in the eye right now, he’ll break, and that’s just not something he can cope with. So he bolts. He doesn’t know if anyone notices him leaving, only that by the time he stops, back in Mo Xuanyu’s rundown shack, no one is following him.
He cleans up the array that brought him back, trying not to drown in regrets as he does. For a brief moment, he bitterly wishes Mo Xuanyu had left well enough alone, but the feeling passes before it can grow roots. It’s true that Wei Wuxian never asked to be brought back to life, and probably didn’t deserve to be, but he’s not going to spit on Mo Xuanyu’s sacrifice just for that. His regrets are his own fault, not Mo Xuanyu’s.
He notices, belatedly, that he’s been crying, and impatiently wipes at the damp trails on his cheeks. His fingers come away smeared in red and white, and he huffs a weak laugh. He probably looks even more ridiculous now. He’s going to have to find a way to clean up sooner or later, but that can wait until he’s well away from the Mo Estate.
He has no idea what he’s going to do now that he’s alive again – he was perfectly happy being dead, honestly – but he’s never been the type to sit around moping about the things he doesn’t have and can’t do. If he had been, he would have been dead before he was six. He shies away from that thought, because… well. He’s been given a second chance at life, deserved or not, and there’s no point trying to cling to the broken strands of the old one. So he ignores the ache in his heart, and leaves the estate, avoiding the cultivators and stealing a donkey on his way.
Stealing the donkey was maybe a mistake, but just like all his other mistakes, it’s a little bit too late to take it back now. He finds a well to clean up at, hears a bit of gossip, and decides that he might as well do what he can to help.
He rethinks his decision when he realises that, of course, at a hunt this big, it’s no surprise that some cultivators from the Great Sects would be there. Wei Wuxian thinks it’s very unfair that the world keeps throwing reminders of his past at him. This kid in the Yunmeng Jiang robes looks just enough like a younger Jiang Cheng to make Wei Wuxian’s heart hurt. Especially when, on seeing Wei Wuxian, he scowls and says “You!” like it’s an accusation in and of itself.
“What about me?” He asks, bewildered. He’s pretty sure he doesn’t know this kid, even if he does look a bit like Jiang Cheng, so he supposes this kid must have known Mo Xuanyu.
The kid splutters. “Don’t act like you don’t know!” He finally blurts out. “You think you can just show up here and no one will say anything after the scandal you caused?!”
“Scandal?” Wei Wuxian echoes, cocking his head.
“You-!” The kid says again, red-faced and nearly vibrating with rage. “How dare you! Don’t pretend like you don’t know what you did!” He explodes, and thoroughly ignores the bow already in his hand in favour of drawing his sword and levelling it at Wei Wuxian. He doesn’t really feel all that threatened, honestly. He’s had a sword pointed at him by scarier people than this kid. He goes still anyway, because the sword is golden and ostentatious, and it doesn’t look much like a Jiang Sect sword at all.
It looks far more like something the Jin Sect might wield. And, in fact, now that Wei Wuxian is looking at it, the sheath does look kind of familiar.
What are the odds, Wei Wuxian thinks, throat tight, that there are two kids in the Jiang Sect with close enough ties to Lanling Jin to wield one of their swords? Although, he does have to wonder why Jin Ling isn’t dressed in gold. After all, he should be the Jin Sect heir.
“Ah, that’s not what I mean!” Wei Wuxian bullshits, hands raised in placation. “I just didn’t think it was well known enough to count as a scandal, but I guess I was wrong. I’ve been a bit out of touch for a while.”
Jin Ling snorts at him, but he does lower his sword. “I had heard you’d gone mad after you crawled off home in disgrace.” He gives Wei Wuxian a judging look that highlights his resemblance to his father. “You don’t look all that mad, but I guess looks can be deceiving.”
“That they can!” Wei Wuxian agrees cheerfully, and Jin Ling looks like he’s abruptly reconsidering his assessment of how insane Mo Xuanyu is. “So, how old are you now, A-Ling?”
There’s a flash, and the sword is back in his face again. “Don’t you call me that! You lost the right to call me that after what you did to my xiao-bo.” It takes Wei Wuxian a moment to realise that Jin Ling is talking about Jin Guangyao, and he has a moment to marvel at the nerve of this Mo Xuanyu. Causing trouble with the guy people are now calling the Chief Cultivator and then turning around and sacrificing himself to the Yiling Patriarch? That takes guts, at least, even if it doesn’t speak well of Mo Xuanyu’s sense of self-preservation. Before he can dwell on it, though, Jin Ling throws another curveball at him by yelling; “It’s Jiang-gongzi to you, and don’t you forget it!”
“Jiang-gongzi?” He echoes. “Not Jin-gongzi?”
Apparently, this is the wrong question to ask, because Jin Ling’s – Jiang Ling’s? - eyes widen in outrage, and then he takes a swipe at Wei Wuxian with his sword. Wei Wuxian side-steps, spins, and slaps a talisman onto his back. Jiang Ling collapses like he’s had a mountain dropped on him, which is not an entirely inaccurate description.
Wei Wuxian clicks his tongue and crouches down beside Jiang Ling. “It’s very rude to attack your senior, Jiang-gongzi.” He chides. “Besides, if you can’t even handle one cultivator as weak as me, what on earth are you doing hunting something like this by yourself? Ah, the arrogance of teenagers.”
“You cheated!” Jiang Ling accuses, flailing furiously in an attempt to regain his feet and making exactly no progress whatsoever. “Using filthy tricks just because you can’t manage anything else! I shouldn’t be surprised you’re such a disgrace, you damn cutsleeve!”
Wei Wuxian raises his eyebrows. “Only half way.” He says cheerfully, and doesn’t bother to explain himself when Jiang Ling gives him a furiously confused glower. “But you never answered my question! How rude! If you’re competing to see who can be the rudest young master, I think you must be winning.” He shakes his head in disappointment.
“As if you deserve any better!” Jiang Ling snaps. “And I’m not by myself, anyway, so you better let me up before my jiujiu gets here, or you’ll be sorry!”
Wei Wuxian goes still. “Your jiujiu?” He echoes warily.
“That would be me.”
Wei Wuxian goes slightly dizzy with how quickly all the blood drains from his face. Jiang Ling looks triumphant, which is an achievement, given his current predicament, but Wei Wuxian can’t quite quite spare a thought for that right now. “Right.” He says faintly. “That jiujiu.”
He turns, and there’s Jiang Cheng, striding out of the trees with murder written all over his face. “Don’t say that as though he has more than one.” He scoffs. Wei Wuxian opens his mouth to point out that, technically, Jiang Ling does have more than one – even if Wei Wuxian is supposed to be dead, he was still Jiang Ling’s jiujiu, sort of, mostly – but before he can, Jiang Cheng’s gaze zeroes in on Jiang Ling. “Jiang Ling, what are you still doing on the floor?! Get-” He spots the talisman and a snarl curls his mouth.
Wei Wuxian jumps up and scrambles backwards as Jiang Cheng marches forward and into his space to tear the talisman off Jiang Ling’s back and set it on fire after he’s ascertained what, exactly, it is. Jiang Ling springs up, and he and Jiang Cheng take turns threatening him with escalating levels of violence.
Jiang Ling attacks him again, but this time, before Wei Wuian can figure out what to do, Jiang Ling’s sword is deflected by Bichen, and Wei Wuxian topples onto his ass in the dirt in surprise. Today just really isn’t his day, it seems. To be confronted with Shijie’s son, who apparently hates Mo Xuanyu for some reason, and then Jiang Cheng, who’s apparently still so angry at Wei Wuxian that he’s taking it out on other demonic cultivators, and then Lan Zhan, who Wei Wuxian can’t bear to so much as look at.
Lan Zhan and Jiang Cheng snipe at each other. Or rather, Jiang Cheng snipes at Lan Zhan and Lan Zhan’s disciples defend him. “Since we’re all here hunting the same thing, why don’t we work together?” One of them asks, and Wei Wuxian realises that they the same group from the Mo Estate, and he recognises that kid as the one who’d been in charge of the others then; Lan Sizhui.
Jiang Ling hesitates, frowning, and Jiang Cheng scoffs. “Well? Go on, then.” He barks. “You can’t just stand around and expect your prey to throw itself onto your sword. You told me you could handle yourself on a proper night-hunt, so don’t you dare disgrace our sect in front of everyone!”
Jiang Ling bristles right back at him. “I don’t need their help to catch this thing!”
“Of course.” One of the other disciples, standing shoulder-to-shoulder with Lan Sizhui says sweetly. “Jiang-gongzi must be a cultivation genius on par with his famous jiujiu.” It’s a bit of an over-the-top compliment, Wei Wuxian thinks, but there’s really no reason for Jiang Ling to be scowling at the boy like that, or for Jiang Cheng to suddenly look so angry.
“Didi.” Lan Sizhui hisses in reprimand, before turning to Jiang Ling. “He didn’t mean-”
His brother, apparently, makes a little noise in the back of his throat. “Are you saying you think the great Jiang-gongzi is unworthy of such a compliment, Da-ge?” He asks innocently, and Lan Sizhui shoots him a chiding look.
“Of course not, he’s an excellent cultivator.” Lan Sizhui says evenly, which makes Jiang Ling go rather pink. Wei Wuxian finds it both adorable and heart-rending, because it makes him look, just for a moment, like Shijie. “But you shouldn’t have said it like that.”
“No, it’s fine.” Jiang Ling says, drawing himself up. “I’m sure he’ll be very pleased to be proven right when Jiujiu and I catch this thing.” He fires back, in this argument Wei Wuxian doesn’t understand at all, and then turns on his heel and marches off into the trees with his nose in the air. Now, Wei Wuxian thinks ruefully, he looks like the stupid peacock again. Jiang Cheng storms after him.
Wei Wuxian tries to leave discreetly, but hauling himself out of the dirt isn’t that subtle, and the Lan disciples notice him. “Hello again, Mo-gongzi.” Lan Sizhui greets him politely.
Wei Wuxian laughs awkwardly. “Hello again, Young Masters.”
“We were worried, when we couldn’t find you after that fierce corpse’s hand attacked.” Lan Sizhui’s brother adds. It’s exactly what Wei Wuxian had been hoping they wouldn’t bring up.
“Aw, you’re so sweet! I’m fine, I’m fine!” He assures them, mustering up a grin as he hops up and dusts himself off with exaggerated motions. “I was just so excited to get away from that place, since I finally could!” He adds, and several expressions twist towards pity. Wei Wuxian doesn’t dare so much as peek at Lan Zhan out of the corner of his eye, to see if he’s reacting at all.
“It would have been polite to say goodbye before you vanished.” The one called Lan Jingyi points out, somewhere between scolding and petulant.
Wei Wuxian jumps on the opportunity. “Oh, well! I can say goodbye now!” He points out brightly, like this makes any sense at all, and then bows deeply. “Goodbye, Young Masters, and stay safe on your hunt!” He chirps, and then scarpers before they can muster up a response.
He wants it noted, somewhere, by someone, that he was going to leave. He really was. Only then he figures out that everyone here has no idea what they’re hunting and Jiang Yanli’s son is right in the middle of it, and he would never be able to forgive himself if Jiang Ling got hurt when Wei Wuxian could have done something to prevent it. And then, of course, everything goes spectacularly wrong, like a cascading domino effect where every move Wei Wuxian makes to try and help only makes things worse. For him, at least, not anyone else.
A hand grabs his wrist, and Wei Wuxian knows who it belongs to even before he makes the mistake of turning and looking. Painfully familiar golden eyes stare back at him, wide and shocked. Wei Wuxian feels frozen, paralysed in place, too many feelings building like a storm in his chest, but then Jiang Cheng is there, and Lan Zhan’s attention shifts, and Wei Wuxian can suddenly breathe again.
When Lan Zhan and Jiang Cheng actually start fighting, Wei Wuxian decides it might make a decent distraction, and tries to leave. Zidian halts him in his tracks, flinging him to the ground with the force of the blow, and he plays up the pain and indignation, whining and wailing and generally acting as pathetic as he possibly can. If he makes enough of a scene, perhaps everyone will forget that they saw him summon Wen Ning with demonic cultivation, and he can just slink away at some point.
His hopes are dashed when Lan Zhan declares his intention to bring Mo Xuanyu back to Cloud Recesses. Wei Wuxian is so busy trying not to let the memories break him that he entirely misses his opportunity to object.