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“Don’t worry, sweetheart, Dr Getz is a professional. You can trust her.” Tony tried to reassure his husband and patted his arm.
The engineer’s eyes were glued to the baby carrier by his feet and their little son Peter, who was happily chewing on his toy. The four month old toddler noticed his daddy looking at him, waved his Nuby teething ring at him and smiled brightly. The first tiny baby tooth peeked out of his pink gums. Tony wiggled his fingers at the boy and Peter giggled in delight.
“Oh, it’s not Dr Getz I’m not trusting,” Steve told him, a little miffed. Self-consciously the soldier zipped his hoodie up that he wore over his shirt, and crossed his massive arms over his chest. He twitched when the movement made his shirt rub over his aching chest.
Tony pressed his lips into a thin line, trying to keep himself from laughing. Because that would only make things worse. “I’m sure it’s not that bad. Lots of parents have those problems,” he tried, but promptly shut up when Steve’s blue eyes bore into his own and he was confronted with the ‘Captain America Is Very Disappointed In You’ eyebrow.
“Do I have to remind you who’s responsible for this whole… situation?” Steve whispered and nervously looked around the waiting room, where other young mothers were sitting, some with huge baby bumps and some with carriers. They had all looked at the gay pair a little awkwardly when they’d first entered the room.
Tony probably should feel bad for his husband. But it was his nature to make a bad situation even worse. He just couldn’t not. Tony blinked at Steve and in lieu of answering the rhetorical question that was still hanging in the air between them, he pointed at Peter, who simply cocked his little head at his fathers. Steve frowned and rapped Tony over the knuckles with a magazine from the table next to him.
“Ouch, that hurt, pumpkin,” Tony shook his hand, but it came out as a quiet laughter.
“You’re sleeping on the couch for another week,” Steve decided and ducked his head where he was sitting in one of the uncomfortable generic plastic chairs. Tony could only describe his husband’s demeanor as pouting and it was the most adorable thing ever, next to their son of course.
Tony chuckled even though he could already feel his back aching from the promise of another seven nights on the couch. Knowing Steve, he’d pull through with the threat, no matter how much Tony begged. Admittedly, he really should feel at least a bit guilty. After all, he’d abused his husband’s nipples without his knowledge to get their son to sleep for much longer than he wanted to admit.
Peter just favored real nipples over pacifiers, Tony couldn’t blame him. And Steve had some very nice pecs and very nice nipples. (Which Tony knew from experience) And the idea had sounded so great at the time. After all, it had worked! Steve slept like the dead anyway, and Peter had been satisfied after a few minutes of happily sucking on his papa’s nipples. The baby had stopped crying, Tony had gone back to sleep, and Steve had been none the wiser. At least until he’d accidentally found the pictures which JARVIS had taken of Tony and Peter on his husband's phone.
And that was how their little secret nipple adventure had come to an abrupt end.
That had been three days ago.
In Tony’s defense, he’d wanted to stop long ago, at least since Peter had started teething a short while ago. But with the teeth came the pain, and with the pain the crying increased, and with the increased crying the sleep Tony got every night had decreased significantly. He still had the night shift and was responsible for Peter from dusk until dawn, so to speak. So he’d just continued.
As a side note, Tony had read somewhere that the natural color of one’s nipples was also the person’s most natural shade of lipstick. Well, Steve’s usually pale pink nipples had become a bright red over time. Not that red didn’t suit his husband! And having someone bite down on your nipple was, after all, very sexy. (Yes, Tony knew that from experience as well.) But after weeks it perhaps became just a tiny bit painful. Maybe.
Tony had done a double take when he had accidentally walked in on his husband placing band-aids on his red and abused nipples in their bathroom a week ago. It had been very embarrassing for both parties involved. For Steve because his husband had found him shirtless and with little rainbow colored band-aid Xs over his nipples, and for Tony because he’d gotten a boner in record time.
Peter had stayed with his aunt Pepper that night, because his parents had had very parents-y things to, ahem , discuss.
Back in the present, Tony took his husband’s chin in his hand and turned his head around so he could press a kiss to Steve’s lips. Satisfied, he felt his beloved husband smile into it, knowing that Steve didn’t really hate him for his little stunt.
Little Peter watched his parents fascinated. The moment was over when the door to the waiting room opened and a young woman in a blue shirt and white pants stepped into the room. She held a clipboard to her chest and looked all business. She reminded Tony of Peter’s aunts Pepper and Natasha. It was a bit unnerving to be honest.
“Mr Stark-Rogers?” she asked and raised a brow when Tony stood up and grabbed Peter’s carrier. “Please follow me.”
“Come on, honeybunch. It’s time.” Tony wiggled his fingers at his husband.
Steve took his hand and rose to stand next to Tony. He sighed deeply and rubbed over the bridge of his nose. “I thought getting frozen in an iceberg for seventy years was the weirdest thing that could’ve happened to me, but here I am, a one hundred year old, male senior citizen on my way to an appointment with my obgyn.”
Tony chuckled and rose on his tiptoes to be able to press a peck to his husband’s cheek. “I love you, muffin. Don’t worry about it. Dr Getz will save you and your gorgeous nipples. And on the way home we’ll get some burgers from Mcdonalds, okay? Will that cheer you up?”
“Okay,” Steve agreed with a lazy smile and one raised eyebrow. “I’ll need something greasy and unhealthy after this. I can already feel it.”
Tony laughed at that. Peter just waved his wet toy at his parents, blissfully unaware of the fact that he was the root of all evil.
.oOo.
As it turned out, Dr Getz was very professional.
The corners of her mouth just barely lifted when Tony told her about the situation at hand and how it had come to this, since Steve sat embarrassed and tongue-tied in front of the middle-aged woman with his shirt unbuttoned, exposing his red nipples for the world to see. The doctor’s assistant on the other hand could barely hold in her laughter, and Dr Getz stumbled three times over her words when she asked her to either pull herself together or leave the room. Choking on her laughter and apologies, the young woman quickly left them alone.
Steve’s face was even redder than his nipples.
Shortly after, the little family left the doctor’s office with a prescription for an antibiotic ointment and instructions to leave Steve’s poor, abused nipples alone for at least a week. Tony and Steve were both grateful for medical confidentiality.
Though the straw that broke the camel’s back was when Dr Getz told them that it wouldn’t have taken that much longer for Steve to possibly start lactating for real, with the super soldier serum in his veins and his body’s efforts to adapt to the new circumstances.
Tony would be sleeping on the couch for two weeks minimum.
.oOo.
Six days after their embarrassing appointment at the obgyn’s office, Tony woke up in the middle of the night because the lights in the kitchen were suddenly switched on. He stretched where he was lying on the couch in their living room and winced when his joints cracked at the movement.
Slowly he threw the covers back and sat up, rubbing his eyes. Someone was rummaging around the kitchen. Tony heard the door of the fridge open and close and a soft whimpering. Peter must have woken up again.
The little devil kept his parents busy with how vehemently he demanded to suck on his papa’s nipples. Explaining to a four month old baby why it could no longer suck on those delicious nipples was obviously pointless. Steve and Tony had tried every trick they’d read on the internet to get Peter to give up on them, from the most colorful pacifiers to blankets and stuffed toys. But nothing had worked so far.
Tony stood up and shuffled to the kitchen silently. He was only wearing sweatpants and one of Steve’s tees. The cool floor beneath his naked feet was cold. On the clock on the wall the brunet saw that it was barely 4am. When he reached the open doorway, Tony nearly fell flat on his face when he laid eyes on his husband and his current… state .
Steve looked just as exhausted as Tony felt, but he was still the most beautiful man on the planet. He was standing shirtless in the kitchen, cradling their four month old baby boy in his arms. Next to him on the kitchen counter stood a few items that Tony could identify as tools for preparing formula. The whole picture would have been the most adorable thing in the world, if Steve hadn’t taped a small milk carton to his naked chest with adhesive tape .
And Peter? Well, Peter was happily chewing on the straw, perfectly content with the completely ridiculous situation.
“You’re lucky I love you,” Steve deadpanned, rocking their baby gently. Peter waved his little fists at his fathers, looking like an angel, now that he’d finally gotten what he’d wanted all along.
Tony stared at the two most important people in his life for another second before he burst into laughter. The engineer had to hold onto the wooden door frame so he wouldn’t just collapse. His cheeks and belly hurt from laughing so much and tears were streaming down his face. Steve snickered tiredly at his husband, loving hearing Tony laugh so freely and easily.
Another few moments in which Tony tried to gather his wits passed, before he could finally breathe and attempt to speak again. Then the brunet came over to his beloved, and pressed his face to Steve’s naked shoulder. Giggling, he kissed the muscles under Steve’s pale skin. Lovestruck and still giggling, Tony looked at the toddler and gently rubbed his hand over the baby’s belly.
The boy let go of the straw for a moment and giggled happily at his daddy. “Ba-ba, ba ba bada ah, da-da, ba ga a ba-ba,” Peter babbled excitedly at the two adults and proudly showed them his one milk tooth before going back to sucking on that straw.
“I love you too, babe.” Tony pecked Steve’s neck, his chin and then his lips before he looked at Peter once again, offering the baby his index to grab. Their son gave them his best smile and held on tightly to the finger. Tony’s heart melted. He watched their son for another moment.
Then the engineering father grinned up at the blonde. “Now that’s what I would call a Happy Meal.”