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“I think Heart is lucky to have someone like you.”
It was one of the afternoons where they gathered for the occasional conference of leaders from each region. The two princesses were hanging out after the meeting.
They enjoyed each other's company. They strolled through a local market, checked some items from stands, and laughed about silly stuff. After all, it was easy for them to bond over again. They were the same age, both were the princesses, and dragon nerds.
They were taking a break on the river bank when Nammari uttered the words.
“You think so?” Raya asked back a bit unsurely.
“Well,” She halted for a brief moment, contemplating how to put it into words. “You always have a strong belief. That's an important quality to make a good leader.”
“Oh, thanks...That's good to hear.” Raya let out a small sigh and hugged her knees. “You know, I'm not sure if I'm doing well at my duties. When I was younger, I had been trained more as a guardian of the Dragon Gem than a leader of people. Then, I...went on a six-year journey. So, I still have a hard time getting used to those 'princess jobs'. To be honest, I sometimes wonder if I'll ever be enough.”
“Then, you should know that people speak highly of you all over Kumandra. I hear them praising you a lot.” Namaari didn't think that Raya should consider herself unworthy. To her, the princess of Heart was far from unworthy. In fact, if anything, she would say she was the one who was "not enough". Not enough to stand beside Raya. She didn't deserve such an amazing person like her….
“Hey, are you okay?”
She was snapped out of the thoughts. There, Raya was looking at her worriedly. “You seem upset.”
“Yeah, I'm fine. I was just...trying to remember the things they said about you.” She shook her head. “Like, do you remember when you beat off the bandits in the Fang's village? The villagers said you were really brave.”
Instead of taking the compliment at once, Raya shrugged. “I think the credit goes to you too. You scared them off when you showed up with that glare and blades. I mean, you look pretty scary when you're in a rage.”
“Okay, so 'we' beat them off. But that's not the point. I was at the other side of the village when the attack started, so some villagers told me the whole story saying that you didn't hesitate to step out.”
“Why would I? I got my sword, and I know how to fight. I was pretty sure I could kick their butts.” The Heart guardian said nonchalantly.
“You could've just dodged them around and waited for me and the guards to make it there. Instead, you decided to fight them off right there all by yourself. You put everyone else's safety first over yours. Even the guards admired your courage and strength.” Namaari took a breath, realizing she had been talking too enthusiastically that she was almost breathless.
Toi, I must sound like a dork. She wondered if Raya caught her uneasiness and would make a teasing comment on that.
When she looked at her, however, her friend was just sitting there and staring at her curiously.
“An approval from stern soldiers of Fang? Huh, then I guess I'm not too shabby after all.” Then she saw the corner of her lips lifted. A subtle, yet perfect smile. She always liked it when she smiled. It would always light up her world. But she didn't tell her that because it would sound, well, creepy.
“And your gang also told me a lot about you.” Instead, she continued the story just so that she could see her favorite smile a little longer. “To quote Tong, you've got 'a big heart for a little girl.' He appreciated that you had let him take part in the journey even after he had almost killed you.”
“Well, I eventually figured that he was actually a big cuddly papa bear. By the way, 'a little girl'?” The Heart princess raised her brow.
“From his point of view, you are just as a kid as Boun.” The other girl shrugged back at her.
“Hey!”
“You said that. Now he's a big cuddly papa bear to you too.”
Raya frowned at her antics, but soon they both burst into laughter.
“Speaking of Boun,” Namaari spoke out of her laughter. “He thinks you're like a fun sister he wishes he had. As for Noi, well, I'm not sure what she was exactly saying, but she seemed to agree with them.”
When she glanced over at Raya, their eyes met. She noticed that her eyes shine like amber with the sunlight. Her gaze somehow made her feel vulnerable and strong at the same time, making her heart flutter.
“...And Sisu said, that you can see what lies deep inside of someone. She told me how you had been distrustful of anyone, but in truth, deep down, you never gave up your faith in people. Just like you did put trust in me when the world was falling apart…”
She tried to steady her breath, realizing that her voice had been shaky. “And I…” But she stopped right there. There were so many things she wanted to tell her, but she couldn't figure out the way to express them. “What I'm trying to say is that there are many people and a certain dragon who admire you in the way you are. So, don't despise yourself. You are already doing great as a princess.”
They just stayed silent for a while.
“Thanks, dep la.” Raya was the first one to break the silence. Dep la . The nickname meant something special between them. Namaari would always feel a tug at her chest whenever Raya called her like that.
“Although, you should probably show some interest in small talk. I saw you getting bored and scribbling something on your note.” She quipped so to cover up sudden embarrassment. “And I think your father saw that too. I caught him smiling wryly.” She smiled to herself. A little exchange of banter felt more natural for them.
The Heart Princess groaned and brought her hand across her face. “Dang it, I promised him that I'd behave myself this time.”
“Hey at least you didn't bite off someone this time. That's progress.”
Her comment earned another pout from Raya, but they both knew it didn't mean to offend or insult the other. In fact, it was one of the moments they felt more at ease, where they can act foolishly like common teenagers.
What Namaari didn't tell her is that she found her little drawings cute for some reason, and maybe something other than that too. She didn't say that because again, she didn't want to sound like a stalkerish dork.
She let out a small chuckle, and soon the other followed suit.
The sunlight was shining on the river, and several people were walking by. The wind carries the distant buzz of the market. They let the wind pass by while taking in this peaceful view.
The tranquility was suddenly interrupted by a thud.
The two girls turned to where the sound came from and found a little boy fell down to the ground. He started to sob with pain.
Namaari stood up promptly and walked to the boy.
She kneeled down to his eye level. “Hi there little one. You alright?” She cooed.
The sob got louder.
“There, there, kitten. It's okay, it's okay.” She patted his arm gently. “Do you know a magic phrase to cure your pain?”
Her words seemed to get his attention. “A magic phrase?”
“Yes. And it's a dragon's magic! Here's how it goes; Pain, pain, go away. Let the dragons take it away .”
The sob was stifled.
“See? It's working.” She beamed at him. “Now, let's say it together with me this time. Pain, pain, go away. Let the dragons take it away .”
The boy was not crying anymore. He wiped his tears with the back of his hand but got some dirt on his face from it.
The older girl chuckled. “Here, let's get you cleaned up.” She took out her handkerchief, and wiped the dirt and his tears with it. “There, you're good as new. Let me see your big smile, would you?”
The little one grinned brightly. Namaari smiled back at him. “That's my favorite kitten! Now, can you stand up?”
He nodded, getting to his feet.
“Can you go back home by yourself?”
He gave another nod firmly.
“Good. Then go get yourself some bandage for your scratch, okay?”
The boy nodded one more time and walked away. He turned around and yelled “Thank you!” before he left there.
Meanwhile, Raya was watching this sight in awe. It was surprising for her that the Fang Princess's usual severe look goes soft around children.
“Kitten? A dragon's magic phrase?” As she saw Namaari walking back to her, she couldn't help making a comment on what she said to the kid earlier.
“Well, it's what we usually call the kids in training in Fang.” Namaari looked flustered, realizing the teasing tone in the other's voice.
“What about the 'dragon's magic' part?” She added. “You're such a big dragon nerd.”
“Right back at you, binturi .” The Fang warrior snorted. “When I was little, my late great-uncle used to comfort me like that when I got hurt. It still gives me the strength to get through hard situations. And it's actually a good distraction for children because it sounds funny.” She sat down next to Raya.
“You really are good with kids. No wonder you get a herd of them following you around all the time. It's like you have a mini version of your troop!” The Heart guardian laughed out loud. “But seriously, you're already an admirable leader yourself.” She wiped her tears out of the corner of her eyes.
“Me? An admirable leader?” The Fang Princess reacted in a rather skeptical way.
“Who's the distrustful one now? It's not just flattery. I see it in those kids' eyes. They don't tag around you because you're their princess. They know that you're a caring person.” It was one of the things Raya learned about Namaari during their time together after the Druun had vanished. The more they got to know each other, the more they felt close to each other. And that made her happy. She was glad that they were friends again.
“And it's not just kids.” She went on. “Like earlier, I heard some of the council members commending your attitude toward negotiation, saying you are wise enough to contemplate every aspect instead of jumping to the easiest way. Even my Ba was impressed!”
“He did?”
The Heart Princess smiled proudly. “Yep. He said that he found some of your proposals inspiring.” There were still so many compliments she had on her mind. She could never run out of them. “Oh, and the villagers! They told me how you work hard to bring prosperity to the land, and they are proud to have you as their princess.” She really wanted the Fang Princess to know how great she was.
However, Namaari dropped her eyes. “But they don't know how awful I am in fact. They don't know that I almost destroyed the world, or terrible things I have done to you…!” She cried out.
“Hey, we talked about it, remember? We fixed the world at the end. YOU chose to fix it.” Raya soothed her. “I know you can make the right choice. Because you made the right choice back then, the world is here. We are here. So, please don't feel bad about yourself, for me…?”
Even though they had already cleared the air, sometimes Namaari would be sunk in deep regret. She still carried around guilt with her and had a hard time letting go of it. Whenever she was around, Raya would always convince and assure her that she didn't blame her for the cataclysm anymore.
“We were a mere outcome of the discord of 500 years. It is either no one's fault or everyone's fault.” She once had said.
The Fang warrior let her tensed body relax. She sighed out. “I...um, I'm glad you stay around me. And thank you for telling me all those things.”
Raya smiled gently. “Anytime.”
She realized the warmth in her hand. Suddenly, she found herself holding the other's hand for all this time.
“Oh! Er...Sorry, this must be weird.” She tried to withdraw her hand quickly.
“Nono!... It's okay.” Namaari stopped her right there. “Actually...can we stay like this for a bit longer? I mean, unless you don't want to…” She asked hesitatingly.
“No! It's totally fine with me too!” The response rushed out of the Heart Princess's mouth in no second. As a matter of fact, she wanted that as well.
A faint shade of red spread across the Fang Princess's face. “Thanks, Raya. I...appreciate you being here.” She shyly smiled back, brushing her hair back that was curtaining her sight.
It took a while before Raya caught herself staring at her. As they spent time together, she had eventually learned a lot about Namaari such as she would tuck her hair behind her ear when she got nervous. Raya liked to see that because it seemed like she let her see the softer side of her.
Or maybe she liked it because she looked just...
“Pretty…”
“Huh? Did you say something?” Namaari looked into her face wonderingly.
“Wha-? Oh! Yeah,” She was snapped out of a daze, realizing it slipped out of her mouth. “I mean...uhh, you've got a pretty cool style, you know?” Yeah, "pretty cool" it is. She concluded.
The Fang warrior tilted her head, wondering why the other suddenly seemed flustered.
The Heart guardian finally regained her composure to continue on. “Like, you have good taste in jewelry! Not everyone manages to get away from looking tacky with so many of them. And you've got your awesome blades too!” Then she smirked, “I'm sure there's a lot of kids who wanna be a cool cat lady like you, Princess Undercut.”
“Now I'm not sure whether you are complimenting me or insulting me.” The Fang Princess sneered back, waiting for another comeback from the Heart Princess.
“Geez, I thought you were smart enough to see through that, dep la.”
Their exchange somehow gave warm and fuzzy feelings to Namaari's heart. She couldn't help letting out a laugh.
Raya felt flips in her stomach seeing her laughing. She didn't know why or what to do with it. But it was definitely not an uncomfortable one at least.
“Hey, dep la?” Namaari turned to Raya, looking straight into her eyes. “I'm...I'm really glad we're friends again.” She was not skilled at understanding or expressing her feelings, but she could tell her this for sure.
Raya returned the same gesture. “Yeah, me too.” She liked this tenderness between them.
There were much more things they wanted to tell each other, much more deep feelings.
But they didn't know where to start. For now, this seemed right to them.
It had taken few days for them to trust and fix Kumandra, and it had taken just seconds for them to reunite as friends. Maybe they would get there soon enough.
Someday…
If I could tell her...