Work Text:
Seer’s Log
Stardate: Who the hell knows I'm not the cartographer
Father has tasked me with reading up on all of the books that he decided to bring along with him when he split for whatever reason. While I had already memorized the contents (being a robot with boundless intellect does that) I do enjoy a good read and as such did not complain. After sifting through the several books on horses, ponies, and equines of all kinds, I found one on Troll History, likely nabbed from my loving wife moments before our departure. It is quite an interesting read, and well, there is quite a bit to say about it. For example, did you know that-
YO WH4T’S UP B1TCH?
Terezi said with her usual grace, kicking down the door to my quarters. Which is quite the feat, considering that it was locked and a sliding door. I should ask Father to make the doors more secure. Not much Terezi. How about yourself?
l added, tactfully hiding my frustration with the other Seer.
1 F33L L1K3 SH1T WH4T D1D YOU 3XP3CT?
she replies. I almost expected it to happen, honestly, she is quite predictable. Exactly that, Terezi. Exactly that.
SO WH4T TH3 FUCK 4R3 YOU UP TO?
she says, with her primitive manner. Well, my fellow Seer, I am currently reading up on the history of your kind. It is quite a fascinating read to say the least. What do you know about your history?
4DM1TT1NGLY, NOT MUCH. BUT, HOW MUCH DO YOU KNOW 4BOUT YOUR H1STORY?
More than you do about yours I can assure you
SO TH3N WH4T OF YOUR 4NC3STORS?
Whatever do you mean?
HOW MUCH DO YOU KNOW 4BOUT TH3M
Well given the complex nature of our existence I think my mom was the only one I could call an ancestor. I didn't even have the pleasure of knowing who my father was
W3LL SH1T, G1RL. TH4TS K1ND4 ROUGH
Well I am still grateful that I had an ancestor I could interact with, nauseating as it was
Y34H 1 M3T MY 4NC3STOR ON TH3 M3T3OR. YOU W3R3 TH3R3, SO YOU WOULD KNOW.
Yes, I remember. You had a whole fit about her being ‘SO R4D’
W3 S41D W3 WOULD NOT BR1NG TH4T UP 4NYMOR3
I try to stifle a laugh but fail miserably
Well if there is one thing you have that due to the nature of mine and my kin’s creation we do not, it’s actual ancestors. You know, the adult versions of who you could have been. I believe you roleplay as her, no? This, Redglare person?
F1RST OFF, SHUT UP. S3COND, Y34H 1 T3ND TO DO SO. SH3 1S, W3LL W4S, 3V3RYTH1NG 1 4SP1R3D TO B3 4S 4 GRUB
So what changed?
SGRUB CH4NG3D TH4T. 1 H4D TO FOCUS ON H3LP1NG OUT MY F3LLOW TROLLS, 4ND 1 SUPPOS3 W1TH T1M3 TH3 D3S1R3 V4N1SH3D. K1ND4 L1K3 HOW YOU PROB4BLY W4NT3D TO B3 L1K3 YOUR 4NC3STOR, TH1S ‘MOM’ YOU K33P M3NT1ON1NG
I suppose to an end that is true. Though I did not like the way she went about herself, what with her alcoholism and passive-aggression, she was still the closest thing to family I had. Especially since Jaspers died. She held quite a funeral. And while most people might see it as extravagant and pretentious, possibly even some deep-layered irony, I could feel a bit of sadness in her movements that day.
SOUNDS L1K3 SH3 D1D C4R3, 3V3N 1F 1T W4S H4RD TO S33 1T
Well of course it would be hard for you, Terezi, You’re blind
YOU KNOW WH4T 1 M3ANT
This time I make no effort to keep from laughing
WH4T’S SO FUNNY, L4LOND3?
Nothing, nothing. I just enjoy our talks. They’re equal parts intellectually stimulating and entertaining
3NGL1SH, ROS3 HUM4N
They’re smart and funny
1 KNOW, ROS3. 1 KNOW. 1 3NJOY TH3M TOO
So… do you think you can fix the door? You kinda trashed it on your way in
FUCK NO TH4T’S OUR L34D3R’S JOB
Indeed it is, Terezi, indeed it is
Terezi exits with the same grace she had coming in, like a tornado whipping through a trailer park and then just leaving it. Father will have a lot of questions, but I can deal with him on my own. Terezi is quite fun to be around, and I do enjoy our conversations, tactless as she may be. But don’t tell her I said that. She would never let me live it down.