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[=] We begin our story within a little home, on a planet called Sanctua. [=]
(x): Man, these circumcised apples fucking slap.
(-): Pardon me?
(x): Am I wrong?
(-): Dunya you’re correct but kindly shut the fuck up.
> she says with the most disappointed face someone can make <
(x): Aw come on, don’t get your feathers in a ruffle. I’m just saying, it’s some bomb ass cooking! You should be proud of yourself for once Kara.
(-): Wow, I certainly am flattered, having my food be compared to a circumcision. That being said, I am elated you don’t hate my skillet cinnamon apples recipe.
> she says as she puts the dirty dishes in the sink <
(x): Anyways.
> they say while stretching with a yawn <
(x): You said there was a reason you invited me today?
(-): Yes, that is correct. Shall I get into that?
(x): Go off bestie.
(-): So, you are aware of how I recently got into a relationship?
(x): Haha yeah, not like you tried to hide it. You were gushing about it more than a Karen complains about minimum wage workers.
(-): Well, yes. You see the problem is that my…
(+): PAPA IS HOME!
> he says bursting through the front door <
(-): Papa, how many times must I inform you not to be so reckless!
> she says angrily with crossed arms <
(x): Woah, bangin entrance there Mr A.!
> they say excitedly with raised arms <
(+): You’re here again Dunya? I swear it’s almost like I’m actually housing 2 kids sometimes.
> he says in an over dramatic fashion <
(+): Also, perhaps I did bust up the door a little. I was just so excited to come home to see my little star!
(-): I am a 19 year old papa, I am very much not “little”!
> she says making air quotes <
(+): Either way, you kids want me to make you some food? I can make a mean plate of fried rice.
(-): Actually, we were planning to go out for some fast food.
(x): Wait, I thought we were…
> she elbows them, and they play along <
(x): Oh yeah, I’m absolutely ravenous for some fries right about now.
(+): I also know how to cook fries from the heavens themselves!
(x): Well, I wouldn’t mind…
> she grabs their arm and drags them out the door <
(-): Bye papa, we’re going now. We’ll be back soon. By the way, you should change. You resemble a duck who fell right in a mud puddle.
(+): Aw alright, stay safe you two! Also hey!
> she drags them out the front door as they look devastated <
[=] We continue our story with a walk down the sidewalk. [=]
(-): I cannot believe he just barged in like that. Imagine the audacity.
(x): f.. fries...
> they say sadly <
(-): Are you even listening?
(x): Wha? Oh yeah, how about you continue what you were going on about earlier?
> she gives them a stanky look but continues nonetheless <
(-): My papa doesn’t approve of the person I’m in a relationship with.
(x): Well that’s pretty wack, why not?
(-): I am uncertain, something about a vengeful aura.
(x): I suppose that does sound about right for the old man. Doesn’t he believe in some weird ass cryptids?
(-): I’d rather not contemplate his weird obsession with dubiously real organisms. That’s besides the point though, I just don’t know what to do.
(x): I mean, it’s not like you don’t have your fair share of weird interests. I still remember what you did with those ropes. Also wait, you're an adult, why do you need your father’s blessing to date someone?
(-): Okay fair, but look. It’s not that I require his approval to date, it’s just that it makes things so much more complicated than they need to be.
(x): Don’t you think you should live a little more freely? Worked for me after all.
(-): Dunya we’ve discussed this before, our family situations are very different.
(x): I mean come on, a romance forbidden by your family. Have a little bit of fun!
(-): Dunya, you’re becoming unreasonable.
(x): Screw this, I say you act like a proper rebel and take agency in your life!
> They say in an exaggerated comedic fashion <
(x): Grab life by the balls and drag it to the land of greatness, and once there climb to the very top of victory hill and plant a flag in your honour. Make the universe your bitch as you…
(-): DUNYA, CAR!
> they nearly avoid becoming roadkill as the car honks it’s horns angrily <
(x): Oh fuck.
(-): Are you okay?!?
(x): Yeah I’m chill but, did you see something huge and white as well or was that just me?
(-): Um, no. I’m pretty sure that’s what we refer to as having your life flashing before your eyes. Good lord, why did you have to be so reckless.
(x): Look, I just got a little caught up in the act okay.
(-): Please, never do anything so stupid again.
> she says as tears form in her eyes <
(-): Suddenly my appetite has vanished, I think I’ll be heading off now.
(x): Bye, Kara. Take care.
> they say in a worried tone <
(-): Bye.
> she says blankly <
[=] Our next scene is an afternoon walk through Skyview, the local park. [=]
> her phone begins to ring it’s Barza <
(÷): Hey, how are you doing babe.
(-): Not so good currently, same issues I always talk about. Having to live around reckless people all the time. I feel exhausted by it quite often.
(÷): Lord, my hair is so full of split ends right now. Do you ever get split ends?
(-): Yes? What does this have to do with anything?
(÷): Just listen. Sometimes you try everything you can, special combs, special shampoo, special products. Yet no matter how much you do to fix those split ends they still drive you mad.
(-): Okay. Where are you going with this?
(÷): Pay attention. When you finally can’t take it enough, what do you do to fix the split ends?
(-): Give up?
(÷): You cut off the split ends so your new much better hair can grow in. Leaving you much happier than your old situation. Doesn’t that sound much more pleasant?
(-): I suppose so. AJJAF!
(÷): Are you good?
(-): Nearly fell off the bridge that connects our towns together. Thankfully I somehow caught my balance again.
(÷): Well, that’s a relief, it seems recklessness has spread to you, we should fix that soon.
(-): Well since I am currently on the bridge, is it alright if I head to your place.
(÷): Oh yes, that would be delightful.
(-): Huh, that’s odd.
(÷): What’s odd dearie?
(-): There’s this massive white feather on the ground.
(÷): Must be a prop of the local theatre kids, you know how odd they can be.
(-): Wouldn’t be surprised, anyways I’m making haste now. See you soon.
(÷): See you soon, babe.
[=] Let's go back to Dunya, shall we? [=]
(x): Fuck, fuck, fuck I forgot my wallet at Kara’s when she dragged me off. I gotta rush back there.
[=] Okay maybe we’ll skip a bit further ahead. [=]
> they slam through the door <
(x): I huff, hoo, I forgot, huuu.
> they momentarily collapse to the ground <
(+): Woah, woah, Dunya are you alright?
(x): Oh, me? Yeah never been better! I just forgot my wallet here as goofy as that sounds.
(+): Well, luckily for you kiddo I put it away in my safety drawer.
(x): You have a safety drawer?
> they dust themselves off and return to a stand <
(+): Why of course I do, how else am I supposed to keep my most prized possessions safe from Mothasquatcha.
(x): Heh, yeah of course.
> they subtly cringe <
(+): Here you are.
(x): Thanks. Say did Kara get home safely?
(+): My dearest daughter Karma? I thought she went with you to get fast food?
(x): Yeah, about that. We kind of had a little argument that ended with her heading off. I would have thought she would rush back here though.
(+): That’s certainly worrying. We should go looking for her immediately. Are you with me Dunya?
(x): I mean, I wouldn’t have much else to do even if I didn’t want to. Let’s roll!
[=] The duo proceeds to walk to the park. [=]
(x): So last I saw, she was heading in this direction.
(+): Well that doesn’t give us much to go off of but I suppose it’s something.
> the duo begins to search for more clues as to where she has gone <
(+): So, Dunya. Did Karma talk about me at all while you were out?
(x): Well…
> he immediately begins crying <
(+): I should've known she hated my guts
(x): Woah, Mr A. chillax! She just mentioned that you were a bit strict is all.
(+): Still, there’s a reason baby birds leave the nest. It’s always due to the adult birds pushing them away. Literally, it’s quite brutal. The point is, I’m the adult bird in this scenario! Figuratively, not literally.
(x): Mr A. trust me, you’re doing just fine as a parent. Way better than some other parents I happen to know.
(+): That makes me wonder, how are your parents Dunya? You always seem to be stopping by at our place.
(x): I’d rather not get into that, let’s just say getting with some lady ended up burning the bridge that kept us connected as family.
(+): I’m sorry to hear that.
(x): Yeah…
> the duo lay in silence to take a breather <
(+): You know, you’re always welcome to take refuge in our home. Take it as a Mr Akira promise.
(x): Hahaha, I’ll be sure to take that promise, old man. As they say, birds of a…
(+): FEATHER!
> he says with more joy than a child on christmas day <
(x): Good eye sir but, how is this feather going to help us find Kara?
(+): That’s just it, if there’s one thing my cryptid obsession has told me. It’s to always look for…
> he scans the area <
(+): A trail! Look!
(x): Well I’ll be damned, another feather but I still don’t see how this will help us find Kara.
(+): Just follow me on this feather trail, I’ll explain the epic lore as we get to our destination.
[=] Meanwhile, in a random house not too far away. [=]
(-): Hello? Barza?
(÷): Hello my beautiful queen, you seem down, perhaps you hang your coat up with my scarf collection.
> { } say obsessively <
(-): That would be nice, also I haven’t eaten since lunch.
(÷): Feel free to grab anything from the fridge my dear.
(-): Ah yeah su…
> she attempts to open the fridge but it doesn’t budge <
(-): Hey Barz, the fridge isn’t opening.
(÷): Oh, my bad. It must’ve closed when I turned on the omni lock.
(-): Pardon me?
(÷): Is it wrong? To want to keep something you love stored away safely from things that will cause it harm.
(-): Barz, you aren’t thinking straight are you alright?
(÷): Shh, it’s hard to understand right now, but you’ll thank me in a few months when you become adjusted to how great it is here my darling! Life is so much more manageable without windows after all.
> { } say with a demented smile on { } face<
[=] Suddenly outside the house. [=]
(+): And that’s why I always wear 2 sets of underwear.
(x): Mr A. no offense but what the fuck does that have to do with the feathers?
(+): Oh yeah those. So, do you wanna know why I believe in cryptids kiddo?
(x): Yeah why?
(=): CHIRP!
> a majestic beast of pure white glistening feathers descends down from the skies, turning the cloudy night into one with a clear view of the full moon <
(+): Just something called our family guardian.
(=): CHIRP!
> as the guardian opens its mouth exposing a glowing green light from within it prepares to strike down the walls of the house <
(x):
> in awe at the size of the lad <
(+): Whenever members of our family are in danger, our ancient guardian Perma strives to protect us.
(x): Wait a minute, earlier today I was almost run over by a car but managed to escape at the last second, does that mean?
(+): Welcome to the family kiddo.
> he says with a warm gentle smile on his face as a single tear forms in his eye <
> the guardian bursts a giant hole in the house allowing the duo entry <
(+): Karma are you in here!
> his jaw begins to drop <
(-): Yeah, right here.
(x): Oh you’re fine.
(-): I mean yeah, Barza is kind of weak. Plus telling me where scarves are is a recipe for people’s downfall.
> everyone looks over to Barza bondaged via scarf <
(÷): FUCK FUCK FUCK! Let me go immediately!
(x): Man what a sorry sight.
(÷): It’s nice to finally meet the bastard that left my mother.
(x): Woah, hold up. You’re telling me she was actually a milf?
(÷): I hope you step on a heterosexual lego fucker. Who do you think you are to call her that?
(x): I’m Dunya Maum, mother fucker!
> they shout with extreme pride <
(+): Alright Perma, you know what to do now. Take { } ass to brazil.
(÷): You’ll regret this one day you fucking maldy balding headed twats. Once I find you again you are so gonna be, woah. AAAHHHHHHHHHH!
> Perma takes off with one objective. Take { } ass to brazil <
(=): CHIRP!
(+): So you kids want to try out some of those heavenly fries I made?
(-): I’d love that papa!
(x): It would be an honour my dad of the soul!
[=] And so they ate fries until they were stuffed, and it was time to sleep. [=]
[=] And when they slumbered, they knew that they would be safe. [=]
[=] For they had a guardian of the sky to watch over them, like a guardian angel. [=]
(=): CHIRP!