Work Text:
There was something about Jun Sazanami that made Ibara’s mind run in circles. It was a peculiar feeling, one that he hadn’t expected to feel (let alone towards Jun of all people). Of anyone that could possibly make Ibara feel this way- butterflies in the depths of his stomach and dry throat and everything- it just so happened to be his own unit mate. The one that Ibara bickered with and teased on the daily. How lovely.
Jun wasn’t necessarily a bad guy, but he wasn’t anything outrageously special- yet, that didn’t stop him from being the best he could be. He was always the hard worker and even more of a genuine person; Ibara had seen him a few times with the rest of the ASOBI club, smiling broad with just the slightest curve of fangs, a bright pink coating his cheeks. No matter what happened during their lives and practices, Jun was reliable, and found a solution to anything. He was consistent with his movements, always the brilliant dancer, and could nail the most advanced choreography after only a few tries. Not only that, but he was loyal and empathetic and god, he was everything Ibara wished (secretly, but wished nonetheless) he could be. All in all, Jun Sazanami was perfect in a way that the boy himself never even acknowledged.
Which baffled Ibara even more, because Jun just so happened to be his boyfriend.
The blue-haired idol is sitting at his desk and typing away on his laptop when Ibara opens the door, walks in, and promptly throws his leg over Jun’s waist to straddle his lap, facing him. With just as much casualty as a greeting, the producer lets his head fall onto the other’s shoulder and wraps his arms around his neck.
“It’d be nice if you at least said ‘hey’,” Jun states, not even bothering to look fazed by Ibara’s sudden action, and the other grumbles in annoyance.
Perhaps it’d been the massive amount of frankly unnecessary paperwork dropped onto his desk by the higher-ups in the morning, or the way that the coffee machine just so happened to break down in the middle of making his drink, but Ibara was not having a good day. Hiyori had been nagging him with some sort of complaint about adding corsets to the Eden uniforms (did he even think about how impractical it’d be?) and it had taken a large amount of frustration for Ibara to finally step away from his desk and take a break. Of course he would’ve gone to the cafe and grabbed a snack, maybe, but fine happened to be gathering there at the same time, and Ibara wasn’t in the mood to deal with Eichi Tenshouin and his Obviously Fake But Still Polite Smile. Meaning that the only place he really could go was his boyfriend’s dorm.
Ibara turns his face to brush against blue, fluffy locks of hair, closing his eyes and using his senses to remember the moment instead. Oh, wow, Jun’s cologne smelled good- somewhat sultry, yet still professional. He’d have to ask for the brand later. “Yes, well! I did not have a good morning nor am I currently having a good afternoon. I’m simply not doing great today.” Silence follows those words, and Ibara clears his throat when Jun continues to keep typing. “Emphasis on not doing great today.”
His boyfriend only pauses to roll up the sleeves of his hoodie before proceeding to do what he had stopped doing. “Mm. ‘S there anything I can do to help?”
Ibara raises his fist to give a hard punch to Jun’s arm, and the blue-haired idol yelps. How dense can you be?
A pause, and Ibara can hear Jun put down the lid of his laptop, feeling him wrap his arms around Ibara’s waist. The warmth of Jun’s arms around his torso made him feel so secure, more comfortable than he was when he was sitting alone in the cold of his office. After so many years, Ibara had learned that Jun showed his love through equal words and actions, through moments just as quiet as these. “Sorry, sorry. I’m here for you, y’know? I’ll always make time for you.”
You’re too sweet for your own good, Ibara wants to say, but instead sighs into the fabric of Jun’s hoodie, feeling the softness against his cheek. He wanted to be frustrated, yet- somehow, being with Jun had let his anger fade away. Jun was holding him close and telling him such things… really, it’d be hard to get mad at Jun , of all people. “Forget it... I’m fine,” Ibara mumbles half-heartedly, eyes shutting involuntarily. Maybe he’d be able to forget about how hard work was if he simply just fell asleep, right then and there.
Jun’s arms tighten, and his arms move to hold the small of Ibara’s back, rubbing it gently. Ah, Ibara couldn’t exactly see the older one, but he knew what expression was on Jun’s face- knitted brows, lips turned down into a small frown, eyes softened. He’s seen it too many times to recognize that it only ever happened when the other was concerned (about him, specifically, but Ibara chose to look over that). “Hey, asshole,” Ibara can hear Jun say, “Are you listening? Ibara. Ibara.”
The producer clicks his tongue and decides not to turn his head and look at his boyfriend. “ Jun .”
“I broke your tablet earlier, babe.”
Oh, how he hated that name. “You what- “ Ibara exclaims, sitting back and separating himself from the embrace to glare at Jun, but he’s pulled into a kiss, Jun’s arms immediately clinging to his waist. And what more is there to do then kiss back, his own arms finding their way to leisurely hang around Jun’s shoulders?
If there was one thing that Ibara learned from dating him- Jun Sazanami, that is- it was that Jun leveled their relationship perfectly. When Ibara was brash, Jun was calculating; when Jun was quiet, Ibara was vociferous. Such a dynamic was represented in their kisses as well. The blatant passion that Ibara pushed onto Jun’s lips insistently was met only by grounding composure, and the soothe that he felt when Jun’s hands lowered themselves down to his hips to rub circles into his sides, oh, Ibara could do this forever-
And- never mind, the thought is cut off as soon as it begins when Jun separates himself from their moment. The producer holds himself back from cursing out loud. “Haha, gotcha,” Jun laughs. Well, it turns out that his actions were just a ploy to get Ibara to open up to him, damn it. As if. “Are you gonna speak to me now? ‘Cause I’m pretty sure we’re supposed to be talking instead of kissing.” You’re better at the second one, he wants to retort, but debates against it.
Jun’s piercing gold eyes stare intently into Ibara’s own pair, and the latter can only stare back for a short while before clicking his tongue nonchalantly and looking away. “There is nothing to talk about, Jun,” he mutters, and ignores Jun’s obvious groan of disbelief at those words, “I- only had a bad day, that’s all! Plenty of those where that came from. Hardly anything to worry about.”
“Hardly anything,” his boyfriend echoes, hand lifting to cup Ibara’s cheek, rubbing it gently. Ah, damn Jun for knowing his weak spots and his obvious thing for physical intimacy… at least, Ibara tries to be insulted as his eyes close instinctively. It was only natural for him to do so, when someone such as Jun was taking care of him with the gentleness he barely received in the past. “Call me sappy, or something, but worrying about you’s, like, my job. Aside from being a part of Eden and Eve,” Jun adds, as if Ibara didn’t already know that. What an idiot. “Still gonna worry.”
“You shouldn’t, though,” Ibara can hear himself say, as much as he doesn’t want to and as much as he very secretly desires it. Who was he , someone who didn’t deserve even the smallest amount of love, to receive such adoration from someone as genuine as Jun?
Jun grins the smallest amount, taking Ibara’s glasses in his hands, folding them neatly and placing them on his desk behind Ibara. “I want to.” His hands return back to Ibara’s cheeks, taking the stray strands of magenta locks and pushing them tenderly behind Ibara’s ear; Jun’s gaze was fond, too sweet, too benevolent for someone as spiteful as Ibara (and yet- there he was, still being the victim of such a gaze). “There’s nothing you can do to change that. I’m gonna take care of you ‘nd care about you even if ya insist that everything’s fine.”
Held speechless, Ibara grumbles incoherently as Jun holds him closer, leaning on the older’s chest, pressing his ear against it to feel Jun’s steady heartbeat. It’s always been this way, hasn’t it? To be cared for was to have hair effortlessly pushed behind ears, to be kissed and have breaths taken out of lungs. To be loved as all of those things, and to be looked under the adoring gaze of a boy you thought you wouldn’t care about and yet-
I want you to care for me, goes unsaid in Ibara’s mind, but he knows (quite like the back of his scarred hand, the one that Jun dotted with kisses as if it were something precious) that Jun always will.