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„Fuuta-kun, can’t we get married?“
It was a regular evening in the 0301 household, when Haruka, in all his innocent glory, dropped this question on Fuuta.
Who was at this moment just lazing around with his boyfriend on the couch, flipping through a games magazine, which as a reaction got crumpled quite heavily.
„Can’t we- … huh, what??! How did you even get to that thought right now??“
He was thinking he might have just misheard, after all this was a statement that could be seen as a goddamn engagement proposal.
As an answer Haruka just held up his own current reading material, which belonged to the learning program that he was participating in.
Topic on the pages he showed seemed to be different kinds of legal partnerships.
Ah, so that’s where that innocently fired bullet came from.
„Okay, so listen here. No, we can’t. No chance. Because Japanese politics are shit like that that’s reserved for men and women only here, I’m sure your book says so, doesn’t it?“
„Yes, but w-why is that?“
As always with these questioning puppydog-eyes. Terrible, dropping harsh truths was always extra tough when confronted with that look.
„Because … well, society is also still shit like that who can’t accept things that should be normal. Why do you think I am- … was having so much trouble with that stuff in the first place, huh?“
The redhead might have come a long way with the whole self-acceptance business since their prison days, but this was another one of these instances where he was painfully aware that openly stating things like that was still … just a bit tough.
„I still don’t get why people think that loving s-someone is bad …“
With a slight sigh Fuuta continued his former ramble.
„Besides, there is nothing particularly great about marriage anyway, you know? It’s not like it guarantees that people stay together, so what’s the point, really …“
Still these puppydog eyes looking at him, jeez.
„Tch, come on, what do you want to hear from me here? Point is: we can’t. Also, it’s fine like it is right now, isn’t it?“
And after a short pause, slightly more mumbled: „I tell you often enough that I won’t leave you alone, no need to get that on paper or anything …“
That got at least a bit of a smile out of Haruka, but he was not ready to drop that topic just yet.
„But still … I think it would be really n-nice, the celebration, the flowers and the t-thing with the rings, it all seems really pretty.“
His eyes wandered over the still open pages of his book while listing these things, then stopped looking up for a short thinking pause.
„I wouldn’t be a wife, so that would make us husband and … husband, r-right? Hmmhmm, I think I would like that …“
‚Oh come on, how can you just blurt out things like that and be so cute while doing so, unfair.‘
Fuuta was thinking to himself, after all slightly red in the face, while involuntarily picturing such a scenario.
Including the time in Milgram they had been together for a couple of years now, but Haruka still managed to regularly get him flustered with this innocent directness.
But nope, no, no way to make this happen. Just not possible.
‚But he looks so happy just talking about that stuff, man, what a hassle …‘
Well, it didn’t have to be something official now, did it?
„So okay, let me get that right, for you it’s more the whole meaning and stuff around the marriage-shtick, yeah?“
„?? … I guess, yes.“
The redhead leaned back on the couch, tilted his head a bit to the side, thinking with scrunched up eyebrows.
If this would be just about some rings, flowers and a bit of tam-tam surely he would be able to manage … something, right?
„Fuuta-kun, what are you thinking about? Was that b-bad, did I talk about something bothersome …?“
With a worried voice Haruka flopped halfway on his boyfriend’s side.
„What? No, silly.“
A short ruffle through the blue hair, a gesture that became so familiar over these years.
Well, if Haruka wanted some kind of ceremony so badly, so be it.
„Stay patient for a while, I will think of something, okay?“
--
So that’s what he said, but how the hell do you organize some sort of mock-up wedding anyway?
‚Not like I have enough on my plate with uni and part time work already, but eh, whatever …‘
He was sitting in the campus library, brainstorming over a still baffling blank sheet of paper.
‚Do you do this in private, or with people …? Wouldn’t be much of a celebration without at least a few peeps around, huh? But I kinda don’t want to bring family into this, would be sort of embarrassing … so just friends will be fine, right? That will still be … a little embarrassing, but not AS much …“
„Man, shit …“
„And what are you sighing about?“
„HUEH!“
A familiar voice in the form of Yuno addressed him and shocked him out of his attempted planning.
Even in the Milgram-days she has had an almost scary talent for always being around to meddle in people’s business, almost as if she had some sort of radar for this kind of thing. So quite naturally Fuuta got bothered by her often enough, now that she also frequented the same university.
„Nothing, really, not like it’s any of your business anway.“
While saying this, he tried to sort of hide the mostly empty paper in front of him, but he should have known best that this would spur the curiosity of the young woman even more.
„Yes, a whole lot of nothing, that’s what I’m seeing.“
She sat down on the free chair next to him, apparently intent to get some sort of answer here.
While side-eyeing said whole lot of nothing she asked „So, just an assignment that’s not going so well?“
Fuuta knew at this point that he wouldn‘t get out of this one without giving her some kind of answer that would satisfy her curiosity, and he COULD just try and lie his way out of this, but …
Wait a minute.
Truth was, that he was kinda at a loss here. And maaaybeee Yuno would know a little bit more about stuff like this than him at least. And well, you could say she was one of the ex-prisoner friends anyway, helping Haruka with studying often, so she would probably hear something about that sooner than later anyway.
So he faced the fact that it was time to swallow his pride here and ask for a little bit of help.
„Tch, you won’t leave me alone anyway, so whatever … actually this has nothing to do with university, it’s a … personal planning thing.“
Oh no, he could see Yuno’s eyes light up by the mentioning of ‚personal‘. This was her favourite kind of meddling after all, teasing about relationship-business, he knew that all too well already.
„Okay, the thing is I want to do Haruka a favour of sort, uhm … ah fuck it, I’ll just ask, do you have any idea how to organize some sort of mock-up wedding thing?“
Ah, that look clearly said ‚no way‘.
‚She is going to laugh, isn’t she …?‘
„Who would have thought Mister Kajiyama, you have some romantic spots in you after all.“
„Oi, stop it with your teasing for once, I am seriously asking for help here, okay?“
She obviously had to hold in some slight chuckle here.
„Okay, okay you groom-to-be, let me help you with my feminine sense for aesthetics, because I am 100% sure you will need it!“
That just caught her a very Fuuta-esque grumpy look.
„Hey now, what’s with that face, do you want my help now or not?“
„Yeah, yeah, okay, go on, I’m listening …!“
She cleared her throat in a ‚okay, where was I‘-manner and continued.
„So, you surely have at least a slight plan for things already? Where do you want to go for this? A nice location is important for the atmosphere, you know? What about guests? Family and friends? Okay, I guess only friends in both your cases and that’s not much either, just the gang from the Milgram-times, am I right? Anything in mind for food and drink? Music? Dresscode? Oh, and please tell me you at least have already thought about the rings?“
The redhead was just staring at her in utter confusion.
„Okay, is there also a version in which you don’t fire all those questions at me at once? You do get that I have no idea about this stuff, right?“
Yuno let out an exasperated sigh.
„It really has to be baby steps with you, I see. Wait a minute, let me text Mahiru real quick, I think I will need her help here with this …“
„Wait, wait, wait, do you really have to bring that love-maniac into this as well?“
She quickly shot him a judging side-eye glance.
„Really now Fuuta, even you should be aware that she is probably the most qualified to help out with such a matter, exactly BECAUSE she is such a love-maniac.“
He almost started to already complain with an ‚yeah, but‘, because he wasn’t really sure if he could handle both of the most meddlesome girls from his acquaintances sticking their noses into this matter.
„And besides! What do you think how sulky and annoying she would get if she would not get asked for something like this, would be worse, right?“
He had nothing to counter that argument, fair.
„… yeah, okay, I guess you are right about that point.“
--
„Oh how absolutely lovely, a mock-up wedding, that is so sweet!“
Here he was sitting now with the two young women in their regular go-to cafe near the university. And with that one sentence alone he could already feel his patience wearing thin.
„Yeah, yeah, super lovely. Now can we get that help with planning over with? You know I can’t be home too late, because if Haruka tries to set foot into the kitchen to try and cook something it ends with something exploding or him crying … or both.“
Actually Fuuta WAS glad that he got help here, this should turn out well after all, but Yuno and Mahiru were still kind of … exhausting to deal with as a duo.
„Huuuhhh …“, Yuno didn’t wait long to chime in.
„You sure are already acting like a little house-husband, aren’t you?“
„Shut it now, will you!? Tch, annoying … okay, but anyway … uhm, where to start?“
Mahiru’s eyes were basically sparkling at this point, she was apparently just waiting for the moment to blast out the big guns in terms of planning.
„Alrighty, for starters we will think about the location. We don’t have a lot of guests, not a lot of budget and you want to keep it pretty private, right?“
„Yeah, I guess …?“
„Okay, good! It’s early in the summer right now, so we can go with something outdoor, so you don’t have to reservate something, hmmm … you know that one garden place with the pavilions? That has a nice atmosphere, enough space and sitting places!“
„Sure, I know that one …“
They didn’t have to know that he and Haruka actually went for walks there pretty often, because Haruka seemed to enjoy the calm atmosphere of that place, but …
„So no complaints? Then let’s go with that for now! Then for food, any thoughts for that yet?“
„Eh … pizza or some sort of takeout …?“
That had Yuno burst out „Pizza! At a wedding, are you really serious?“, while Mahiru was just looking at the young man with a look in her eyes that clearly said ‚hopeless‘.
„You know … let’s just go with a cake at the location and after that a visit at a restaurant together, I think that will be less complicated … for everybody. But not something totally shabby, at least think of something a little romantic for that, you hear me, r-o-m-a-n-t-i-c!“
She really got into his face about that.
„Egh, calm down, even I know better than to go to a family restaurant or fast food place for such an occasion.“
„Says the guy who just proposed pizza delivery as a wedding dinner“, Yuno chimed in again.
That remark had him red at the cheeks, sure, that wasn’t his brightest moment a few minutes ago, but couldn’t she just let it be!?
„Okay, okay, now that that’s settled on the most important part, the rings! Even though this is just symbolic and not official, or no, ESPECIALLY because it’s symbolic you have to pick them very mindfully!“
„You say that so easily, but you know that I’m still a university dude with a part time job‘-budget here, yeah? Not like I can go out and get something real fancy or anything.„
Mahiru gave him a slightly sulky look for that and from Yuno’s side an audible sigh could be heard.
„Listen here Fuuta, you don’t need to get something with the rarest metals or the finest gems here, just go and look for something that’s fitting for the both of you, that’s something only you can do, so put effort into this!“
--
After that they settled on a date and delegated some of the organization work, because Yuno and Mahiru seemed very certain that it would maybe end in chaos when everything would be left in the impulsive redhead’s hands. So the part of sending invitations fell to Mahiru and Yuno insisted that they would meet up at a later date to, to quote her direct words, ‚make sure that neither of the grooms would look like a total disaster on their big day‘.
The total distrust in his fashion sense had left Fuuta a bit disgruntled again, but it was quite evident that her opinion wouldn’t be changed there, so he begrudgingly agreed to that as well.
„I’m hooomeee …“
Slightly beat up from this planning-intense day he dragged himself into the flat.
And thankfully he was greeted as usual by quick footsteps accompanied by a „Fuuta-kun, welcome home!“ and a tight hug. Ah yes, instant serotonin recharge.
This had pretty much become their routine due to Haruka usually arriving at home earlier from therapy or his learning program than Fuuta did from university and part time work.
„You are late today, did s-something happen?“
„Nah, just had some planning to do and that took a while, nothing to worry about.“
The word planning made Haruka tilt his head to the side in a questioning manner.
„You know, the thing about … okay, let’s not talk about that here in front of the entrance, first I make food, then I tell you, sounds good?“
„Mhmh, okay!“
--
„So basically I decided to make that wedding happen! … Sort of, at least.“
Haruka looked at him with very wide eyes.
„W-haw, really …!?“
„Like I said, sort of, I told you already we can’t really marry, but … I will give you the celebration and everything around that, that will make you happy, right?“
That wide-eyed look changed into a bright smile, way too radiant for Fuuta’s heart to handle, but that wasn’t the only attack that he would have to take from Haruka’s side.
„Yes, y-yes that would make me happy! Thank you Fuuta-kun, I love you!“
No matter how often he was confronted with the fact, that his boyfriend could just say out these three words so openhearted, the impact always stayed quite heavy.
‚I better learn to handle this without getting totally blown away every time until the whole wedding thing, or I will look like an utter fool, ugh …‘
„Ah … ha, yeah … I …love you, too.“
And that was also something that he better learned to get out without stumbling over almost every word and being red up to his ears while doing so until the big day, yes.
--
„You can’t be serious about this, right?“
Yuno was looking at the redhead with what could be most accurately be described as utter disgust in her eyes.
„What? What’s wrong with it?“
„I tell you what’s wrong, the shoes, the shoes are WRONG. I kept my expectations really low, but really? Solid golden sneakers to your wedding?“
Fuuta in turn looked back quite offended upon having his taste-level judged so harshly.
„Those were expensive, you know!“
„Just because something is expensive that doesn’t mean it fits with everything … or ever in case of … those. You managed to get Haruka dressed totally representable, but not yourself, what’s up with that!?“
Said representable young man was meanwhile sitting on the couch, just watching with an uncertain smile as the bickering was going on. Today was the day where Yuno was at their place to, as she had called it, ‚make a fashion check‘.
And she obviously wasn’t 100% happy with what she had to see.
„So do you have anything … similar to the shoes that Haruka is wearing? Just something simple and black that would go well with a suit?“
She could almost figure the answer to that, but …
„No, why would I even-„
„Okay, stop, why was I even asking? We are going shopping right now! It’s just a few days until the wedding and I’m NOT letting you go out there and end up buying anything comparably absurd.“
The redhead looked a bit startled upon this sudden declaration for a shopping spree, that wasn’t really what he had on the agenda for today, but Yuno didn’t seem like she would budge on this.
„So what, like right NOW-now, or …?“
„Jeez boys, yes, right now. Get changed you two, I will wait.“
Before the two could scamper off to get into some more fitting shopping-attire she quickly pulled Fuuta aside to implore in an almost whisper „But please tell me you already took care of the rings, yes?“, as to what Fuuta replied slightly irritated, but more or less also in a whispering „Of fucking course I did. What do you take me for, as if I would procrastinate something like this …!“
Actually he DID procrastinate this at first for a bit. This wasn’t an easy purchase after all and he couldn’t go to Haruka for input on this, because first of all he wanted the actual design of the rings to be a surprise and second … Haruka didn’t really have much of an opinion in terms of fashion anyway. So after a week of lamenting this decision for himself in his head and looking possible designs up online without being 100% sure about any of them he just gave in and got some assistance directly at a jewelry store.
He felt quite displaced there, but the things you take on for your loved one … right? So in the end he went for a simple silver design with an engrained line in the middle that has a gradient from red to blue.
After the two returned in more casual clothes Yuno was already raring to go, which left Fuuta kind of exhausted before the actual shopping even had started. Which didn’t escape Haruka.
„D-don’t worry Fuuta-kun, Yuno is just trying to help. A-and besides! We haven’t gone out to shop like this in a while, I-I’m sure it will be fun!“
Ah yes, that smile, always a beacon of light. And he hardly could stay grumpy when seeing Haruka that enthusiastic about something anyway. He didn’t get too much time to marvel at that though, with Yuno just getting a slight bit impatient.
„Yes, yes, alright you two lovebirds, we’re going now, less flirting, more shopping!“
--
„Alright … okay … so this is it, huh?“
Just like that ‚wedding day‘ arrived faster than Fuuta had realized. Everything went pretty well, all things considered. Even more than just pretty well, they even got some financial backing from Muu, who for some reason was very eager to do this, as she had said, „As a wedding present and most of all for solidarity!“
Huh.
He first wanted to complain when she just decided that, this would be too much after all, he couldn't just accept that. But he backed down pretty fast, because he couldn’t deny, her shouldering the costs for the cake, flowers and also the shopping that they did with Yuno last week did really help out. His meager part-time work savings already cried a bit due to the rings after all.
So he was standing here in their flat, knowing everything was organized, feeling the case with the rings in his pocket and, to be completely honest: nervous as fuck.
They both had their little speeches, he knew for a fact that Haruka had his also ready, because the girls apparently helped him out with that, because he wasn’t that confident ‚if he could get his feelings out on paper properly‘. So damn cute.
Actually Fuuta was pretty sure that Haruka would have an easier time than him to say all that stuff later on. Because that part still was what worried the redhead the most here.
Of course this was all in the circle of their strange, ragtag found-family-thing that just sort of happened in those weird prison days and they were all coming willingly to this little wedding-farce.
Of course this shouldn’t make him panic. He rehearsed this often enough already.
But still, just baring your emotions in front of an audience was …
Well, he hated to admit that, but it was scary.
„I will surely not run away at this point in the game, you got this, you got this Fuuta Kajiyama …“
While he still was psyching himself up, the sound of the other groom from in the next room snapped him out of his mumbling to himself.
„Fuuta-kun, I-I think it is time, don’t we have t-to get going …?“
„Eh … yeah, of course, I’m ready, we can go now.“
He went from the bedroom to the living room, while trying to shake off the last bit of panic, to join the already waiting Haruka. Who was standing there, flower bouquet already in hands, looking awfully
adorable
giddy.
‚Yes, okay, no, I am not ready, I will die, I will surely die.‘
„Y-you look really pretty today Fuuta-kun …“
‚Yes, I am dead.‘
„Right back at you, silly. So anyway, let’s get going.“
As if to mask his embarrassment Fuuta quickly grabbed the hand of his soon-to-be-husband as they left their home to meet up with everybody at the planned venue at the park.
--
So here they were standing now, in front of their ragtag mix of friends. This all still seemed pretty … unreal. Beginning with the fact that Fuuta by now actually did see most of these people as some sort of friends. Back in the day he wouldn’t even want to get remotely friendly with anybody there, but … well, guess you could say a lot of things happened after all.
And now all these things resulted in this mock-up-wedding somehow.
‚And I swear, if Mikoto dares to laugh about any of this I WILL punch him in the face.‘
He still couldn’t fully shake off the nervousness. But was he happy? Damn right, he was. How could he not be at this moment, seeing Haruka’s smile just a few centimetres apart from him? But it couldn’t hurt to make sure if this feeling of happiness was mutual as well, could it?
„Are you happy Haruka?“
„Yes … very much.“
This whispered exchange of words was almost like a countdown.
‚Okay, so here goes nothing …‘
The redhead took one more deep breath before addressing his significant other once more.
„Haruka I … can’t make a real wedding happen for you, but let me tell you, the meaning behind this has nothing fake or make-believe to it. Back in that place when we first met I would have never imagined that I would ever stand in front of you like this. I was after all just looking out for you… Well, that part hasn’t changed, I still intend to look out for you and protect you as long as I live. You helped me accept a lot of things about myself and for that I am very grateful, because, once again, without that I wouldn’t stand here with you like that right now. You are incredibly important to me and I will make sure to never leave you alone, ever! I love you … a lot, Haruka.“
He did it, he really did it and he was pretty sure without letting his nervousness shine too much through his voice at that. But now he still had to get through Haruka’s part of the vow without melting too much into a puddle, and looking at this face with an now even happier smile and a slight blush on the cheeks that would be really, REALLY hard.
Fuuta gave Haruka’s hand that he had been holding all throughout his speech a quick caress as if to signal ‚okay, your turn now‘, which seemed to make the younger man fluster a bit for a moment, and made Fuuta think ‚Yeah, typical reaction, still awfully cute.“, but he managed to regain his calm just as quickly.
„A-ah … Fuuta-kun … ehehehe … I’m really, really happy about being here with you, a-and also all the things you just said to me. I might not be that good with putting things into w-words, but … uhm … I wanted to say thank you that it was you who paid attention to m-me, and that you are always patient with me. Y-you are very gentle Fuuta-kun, and that I’m the only person that gets to see that s-side of you makes me feel very … special, for that I also want to say t-thank you. You showed me a lot of things and I look f-forward to many more. Because with Fuuta-kun by my side the world is a lot less s-scary. I … I love you so much, a-and I am so, so happy to be loved by you!“
Now it was Fuuta’s turn to just stand there for a moment, very red-faced and also not able to suppress a smile on his face. But he only bathed into that moment for a few seconds, the show had to go on after all, not to mention that he would probably panic if he left too many openings.
‚The … the rings first, right? Damn, I want to kiss him so badly right now, audience be damned, but no, rings, rings.‘
He swiftly got out the case with the rings from his pocket and opened it.
„Hold out your right hand for a second, okay?“, and with that carefully placed the ring on Haruka’s ringfinger, which resulted in more smiling.
„You like it?“
„Mh! O-of course I like it, it’s my bond with Fuuta-kun after all!“
‚Stooop, can you be any more adorable, that is criminally unfair …!“
While this almost cracked Fuuta’s armor of a calm front he thankfully collected himself rather quickly again.
„Heh, I’m glad … so, will you do me the honors as well?“, he asked his now almost-husband, holding out his own right hand as well. And with a „Y-yes, of course!“ he also got his ring gently slipped on his finger.
„S-so we are married husbands now …?“
„Hmm, almost.“
While saying that Fuuta slipped a side glance towards their guests, looking out for a certain signal from Yuno and Mahiru that they settled on so that he could be sure when it would be okay to do this whole ‚you now may kiss the … well, groom‘-thing. And there it was, a thumbs up from both of them.
Reaching out towards Haruka’s neck with his right hand and whispering „Come a little closer, okay?“, while already pulling him towards himself, he planted a rather uncharacteristically shy kiss on the younger man’s lips. He was letting that kiss linger for a short moment before they parted from each other again.
"Yeah, NOW we are a, sort of, properly married couple. Oh wait, just one more thing!"
Fuuta pointed at the bouquet of flowers that Haruka was still holding in his left hand.
"I know you like these a lot, but give that thing a nice toss towards our guests, alright? We want to do this properly, don't we?"
"Y-yes, sure!"
And with that the red rose bouquet went flying.