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When it comes to alternate universes, this one takes the cake. The Natural Museum of History has a tendency of evolving over the years, in the futures I've seen there's stuff from the 2000's that they consider ancient as the pharaoh still on display. When I got word that I'd be hunting a variant of myself, Loki jumped on it so fast to see what he was gonna look like I swear he teleported..and magic isn't even allowed here in the TVA. When we arrived, the year was 2012 at approximately 7:25pm, late hours end at 5:30pm but it still surprised Loki and I that no one saw the glowing orange time door. Once we found that it was locked we opened another time door leading directly inside the lobby, once we entered we saw that the museum's attractions came to life, and were literally playing a mass game of twister, surprisingly..or well, no, not surprisingly, Loki joined the game and honestly his flexibility is off the charts, that was until the variant turned the lights off as a code for the others to scatter due to a supposed threat. I told my partner to put his hands up, begrudgingly he did after a few seconds, and I could practically feel his eyes roll. Two arctic benevolent rings diagonally staring down at us from where the Tesseract was being held high by the Scepter holding it in a old timey Wild West lantern. I know Loki has a soft spot for giants, and this one was no different, I tried to get him to yield..but he was taken just as those northern lights snuffed out. I panicked obviously, I called the trickster's name over the course of an hour until I could hear a low powerful rumbling in the hall of mini figurines. As I got to the entrance to the hall I could start to feel the sound now sounding like purring, the neon blue light of the Tesseract along with the stone in the Scepter and those arctic eyes dimly lit the room and admittedly, I could hear my own heartbeat. The lights in the Museum started to slowly start up again and what I saw was proof of everything I knew about the God, the variant called The Sheriff was sitting with his back against the Wild West exhibit with Loki in his lap holding his face gently between his hands. Turns out the "extremely dangerous, malicious, stubborn" variant was only protecting the Museum and was making sure we weren't from the public they hid their true identities from. The purring came from The Sheriff, which is apparently the variant's name, he was actually pretty quiet but listened to every word we said as long as we honored his wishes to call the Museum before we showed up, as it turns out The Sheriff takes over a miniature cowboy named Jedediah when he gets stressed and acts on the emotion that caused the stress. I put the information in his files at the Museum since they were portable in my tempad and stayed to watch my twins movements, he really is a gentle giant, especially with Loki considering his kids are all massive animal type beasts. He purrs, squeaks like a guinea pig when he talks to himself, curls into the loaf position like a cat on the lobby desk to protect the other miniatures while they watch videos on the computer, and falls into a type of fluffy haired slumber whenever Loki glides a hand from his neck up his golden locks and cascades his fingers through it with some added soft chirps and other low noises as if talking. I should've listened to Loki when he said to never judge a variant by the original, the weapon wielding deity forgave me quickly when we offered him various flowers which he planted in the Wild West, Roman, and Mayan exhibits. I'm gonna simply tell Ravona that I've already dealt with him so no one else tries to touch a hair on his fluffy head.
Sincerely,
Mobius M. Mobius