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I gently make my way towards my laptop after waking up in a house too barren for even a ghost to dwell in. My mind races as I check the news, like I have so many times before, always seeking for the same news station, hoping that the lockdown Tokyo has enforced on its people will just be removed. The all-out battle had stopped a few weeks earlier, no one knew, but I had been losing my sanity even in those three weeks. Given that the lockout has yet to be lifted, I launched the Facetime app. Most of my classmates' wifi and electricity have been on and off for a long time. Water, power, and food have been shut off in several Tokyo neighborhoods. I was lucky, pressing the call button on bakugou’s number. I waited silently for him to answer. One ring, Two rings, his lamp lit room soon clicked into frame.
His ash blond hair flattened at one side from how deep he had slept, and a soft glare at the screen. Probably from me waking him up, “Morning Bakugou...sleep well?” Since the start of the lockout Bakugou hasn’t been sleeping well. Always on guard from the night terrors he gets, back at the dorms wherever he’d have those dreams a soft knock would reside from his side of the wall to mine. I always knocked back. “Slept fine, you look like shit doe.” He replied, I nodded, chuckling a bit. Living in a house where only one person could enter and exit was doing havoc on my mental health. Bakugou is unaware of Mr.Yagami. He is my butler, my family is wealthy, and I have known Mr.Yagami since I was a child. But, despite the fact that he was like a father to me, or at least a paternal role, he never slept in my house. My house has two levels and is spacious enough to hold a party and have some of the visitors sleep over. But for years, I'd have to sleep so alone that if I awoke from a nightmare, I knew no one would rush in to console me. My parents are my parents, but I don't know them all that well. I've never had a relationship with my mother or father. I never had many friends either, so everyday i’d go home from my private school and watch school movies wondering when i’d be able to have a best friend and hold and hug them just like in the movies. “Oi, shima, you gonna say something or what?” I must have zoned out for a bit because now Bakugou had fixed his hair and had gotten out of bed. “Just...just thinking baku, don’t worry.” I replied, smiling softly at him. He scoffed, rolling his eyes and picking up his laptop to place it gently on his desk. “M’not stupid Ei” he started, sighing “I know you’re fucking lonely, seeing how you’re such a goddamn extrovert you’d proabably already lost your damn mind enough to talk to some stuff toy.” I huffed, crossing my arms. “His name is BUNNY FRIEND, okay? And he’s very sweet and listens to me.” He barked out a laugh, causing me to chuckle. “Yeah but as if some bunny could replace me!” I smiled softly, he was right no one could ever replace him, no one knows, not even him, but if i could i would tell him over and over. Tell him how much I love him. “Yeah...no one could replace you Katsuki.” I said softly, he had stopped laughing for a bit. Only a smirk on his face when I said that, but after, his smirk turned into a small smile. Not a grin, not a smirk, but a real smile, and it made my heart fly. “You’re such a fucking sap Eiji.” He stated, and his statement was true. But im only a fucking sap for this roudy blond boy. “Only for you” I flirted back, he got a bit red and flicked the bird at me. I laughed. “C’mon is that anyway to treat your future husband?” He had been drinking tea from a cup his mother had brought into his room a bit ago, now the tea is all over the computer screen of his laptop. I died of laughter, it wasn't long before he started to curse me out and in his fit of rage ended the call. No matter how many times I blatantly flirt with him he never truly understands.
It had been a couple hours since the tea accident, i had just finished watching a show i’ve been wanting to watch when my phone rang. Bakugou had been blowing me up during the show and I never replied. He always hated it when I didn't reply to him. I snatched up my phone and clicked on the answer button. “Hey kat! Sorry i was watching a show” he scoffed, he looked..rougher than when we talked this morning. “Hey, are you doing okay?” I asked softly, he crossed his arms and looked away from the camera for a second. “I had a fucking nightmare, okay, damn.” I stiffened, why didn’t he tell me “Why didn’t you tell me?” I stood up, walking to my room. “Well i fucking tried! You just wouldn’t answer me!” my mood saddened, guilt washing over my body like a tidal wave “Hey how about i- uh- distract you?” He stared at the screen, his red eyes staring into mine in a silent agreement. “Hey so you know what I'm like, kinda rich?” He nodded, placing a hand on the side of his head and softly leaning on it. “Well when i was younger, i told my parents how i wanted a garden in the back yard..and well” I opened the french doors to the backyard to show a flush red and white rose garden. “And welp they got to fucking work.” I turned the camera around to show Katsuki the garden “I think I'd want to get married here,” I looked back at Bakugou facing him back to me “Do you think so, future husband?” I grinned, and again he flipped me off and smirked. I sat down on a white bench at the end of the garden, Bakugou and I talked about everything and anything. The war, school, he even said he missed talking to me. “I-..It’s breaking me apart, katsuki...Y’know how i am, i'm a touchy person who can’t go a week without begging for a hug and now i’ve gone three weeks.” I sobbed, breathing a long sigh. “I know shima, stop fucking crying. I heard from fuckign deku we’ll be able to leave and see each other soon.” I scoffed, “You said the same thing a week ago.” I looked back at him, he had a hurt expression in his eyes. “Well sorry for trying to help you!” He barked back, and this time i'm the one who flipped the other off
“Hey, stop taking your fucking self pity on me!” He slammed his hand on his desk “Im trying to help your sorry fucking ass!” He gotten up abruptly from his desk, “y’know what fucking call me when you stopped drowing in your fucking tears!” He leaned into the camera “Wait- what?” I started but before I could say anything else the call turned off. “Wait katsuki! I’m sorry please…” I stood up, tears running down my face even more. Breath heaving as I screamed. I had no intention to hurt him, all my pent up anger and frustration just came out. I fell to my knees, clutching my phone tightly in my hands, Mr.Yagami came rushing out, kneeling down to my side. “Master Eijirou? What’s the matter? Should I call an ambulance?” I shook my head, sobbing my body heaving. “N-no! I w-want my Katsuki!” I could see Mr.Yagami pulling out his phone, his hand gently coming to press circle motions on my back, I heaved. I forgot what it was like to be touched. But i don’t want Mr. Yagami to hold me, I want my katsuki too!
Stupid shitty hair, stupid war, stupid lockout, stupid stupid stupid. Each time I recalled everything they kept me lying awake at night my fist made a crack deeper and deeper into my room wall. Not long till the old hag came throwing the door open, but this time she had a look of regret and complete shock on her face. “Katsuki, get in the fucking car. We’re going to see Eijirou-kun.” The sound of his name on her tongue brought me back to why I was so pissed, but we can’t leave. “Why?” She gripped hard onto my shoulders, “The fuck you mean WHY you brat. I got a call from this Mr.Yagami person saying he’s having a huge panic attack in the middle of his backyard screaming for you. And I'm not letting such a nice boy like him suffer any longer than he has too. He has done so much for you, it’s your fucking turn!” I was still mad, I was still saddened by how he lashed out on me, nevertheless I felt in every cell in my body to go and comfort that boy. I had thrown on my white converse and booked it out the door, my father already in the car with the GPS on. I was going to see Eijirou, and I'm not going to let him go..
My vision was blurry, my legs burned from sitting on them for so long. My throat won't stop closing up and blocking out the much needed air, I don’t know how much longer I'll last. I want to be held, I want Katsuki to wrap his arms around me in a tight hug, I want to smell his familiar caramel scent. “Master Eijirou, someones here to see you.” I shook my head, pushing his kneeling body away with the only energy my weak body could muster. “D-don't need, a-ambulance.” I sobbed, I saw from my tear red eyes Mr.Yagami shake his head. “Sir, the bakugou’s are here.” Katsuki was here?
I shot up quickly, blood rushing to my head making me dizzy, I ran my way through the red and white garden. Turning quickly and ramming into the rose covered wall, thorns clinging against my skin. I didn’t care, I slammed open the french doors, trying to run as fast as i could through the house that made me feel like i was losing my mind. The front doors seemed so close, the large windows showing a gray lexus pulling into the lot, a blond tuft of hair jumping out of the driver seat, I threw open the front doors, running down the stairs, me feet trip on one another, i push through my twisted ankle my shoes pushing me hard towards Katsuki. I couldn't run any longer so I jumped, throwing myself towards hoping Katsuki would catch me, he did. Having his arms wrapped around me so tightly, I couldn't hold back anymore. So I screamed, I screamed and I cried. Every touch sent shock waves of pleasure through me but it wasn't enough, his large hoodie kept his warm skin away from mine. All i could feel was little body heat coming from his clothed body, I tugged hard on his hoodie, pulling and tugging all the weeks gone without being held so close only for a fucking hoodie to get in my way. “Eijirou, calm down.” I looked up at Katsuki, his eyes red from tears, I lifted my hand up and cupped his cheek. “K-katsuki..” he nodded, telling me to go on. “Katsuki!” He placed a hand on mine, his other wrapping around tightly on my waist. Pulling me even closer than before, “I'm right here Eijirou, I'm not going anywhere.” I lifted both my arms up and wrapped my arms around his neck, nuzzling into the crock of his neck as both of his hands held me against his chest. “P-please don’t leave m-me!” I felt him shake his head, his voice on the edge of holding. “I won't, I'm not letting you go.”
Katsuki’s parents stayed over at my house for the time being, they had to call Mr. Aizawa for the reason they had broken the mandate and rushed over to my home. Katsuki and I didn't care to listen, my queen sized bed now felt smaller with another body in it. I was laying my head on Kat’s chest, his warm hands rubbing up and down my back and I tried to snuggle deeper into his safe hold. For the first time in weeks I actually felt held, feeling his heart pulse from the side of his neck, I lifted my head, just a bit, my lips coming in contact with the warm skin. His skin felt so good against mine, I tasted a bit of salt on his neck. It tasted so good. His skin was so warm against my lips, I kissed his neck again and again. Feeling his heart pulse from underneath my lips, the way his breath softly hitched when I pressed my tongue softly against him. “Shima..is me holding you not enough?” He asked, I shook my head no, pressing my lips harder against his skin, then leaving an opened mouth kiss against his neck. I heard him breathe a sigh, lifting his head to the side so I could kiss him more. “I’m sorry, you just...please just.” I felt his fingers run through my hair, scratching my scalp lightly. “I didn't say stop..idiot.” I chuckled against his neck, gripping softly on his shirt. He had found out about why I had been pulling on his hoodie, he could see the need in my eyes to feel skin on skin. I was so happy he did, because when I tried to tell him to take it off the only thing that came out was sob and moans of jumbled up words. “What happened to eijirou?” I asked, pressing another opened mouth kiss to his pulse, he shivered a bit, “Shut up.” he growled into my ear, I shivered, it felt so good to hear his voice, to feel it against my ear, I breathed out a soft moan. He noticed, I know he did, but instead of him yelling or pushing me away, he pulled me closer. I kissed his neck and shoulder again, then moved from his collar bone to his jaw. He sighed again, breathy and light. I looked at him, his eyes slightly closed as he slowly dozed off “Katsuki..I love you.” I spoke, soft. His eyes opened slowly, “Kiss me and I might reply.” And so I did, and fireworks broke out behind my eyes as I did. It was soft, his lips sliding against mine like he was made to kiss me, hold me. I pulled off, his lips slowly chasing mine, “And your reply..?” Katsuki sighed, pressing a hard kiss to my lips, his tongue moving against mine, soft moans coming from my mouth. “I love you too, you shitty bastard.” He murmured against my lips, and soon I smiled against his.