Chapter Text
Musical notes didn't always ring clearly. Sometimes they didn't make sense, or were muffled, and sometimes they clashed in disharmony. Luka had always tried to listen to his own inner music and stay connected with his emotions. Lately though the music wasn't clear, and his emotions didn't make sense to him.
He was in love with a girl named Marinette, and he had been in love with her since their first conversation. He knew she loved someone else, could hear it in the way she spoke to him and feel it when she always held him at arm's length. Emotions were a funny thing though. In his mind he knew she would never love him, but his emotions still weren't fading.
It was probably wrong to keep wanting something more than what she already gave him. Since what she gave him was already more than he deserved, more than he should've ever wanted. She heard his music, but he could tell she wasn't listening. She cried on his shoulder but was never there a moment longer than that. And he was there for her. There when she needed a ride, there when she needed to cry, there when she needed his help.
But other than that? They weren't really much of anything. She didn't love him. And he would never be enough for her.
He kept wanting though, kept waiting. He told himself he was just waiting to see what would happen, but in reality, he was hoping for a specific outcome.
Now, while he was here in his room. Thoughtlessly strumming she wasn't here. She was never here. And it was odd because it made Luka feel something different. It wasn't love and it wasn't hope and it wasn't want. It was something he hadn't felt for Marinette until now.
He was frustrated.
He was frustrated and it was selfish. She didn't owe him affection, she didn't owe him love, she didn't owe him anything. He didn't need any of that either. He was fine on his own, even before Marinette.
No, he wasn't frustrated because he thought she owed him anything. He was frustrated at her still, for blushing and nervously stumbling around, and her sweet laughter when he was with her. It was frustrating because for some reason he thought that meant something.
Which brought him back to who he was really frustrated with. It wasn't Marinette it was himself. He had let her do this to him. He kept letting her use him to cry, for rides, for support. He was just so happy to be wanted by her over anyone else that he never considered that she was never there for him. In a way he'd never let her be there for him either because he was worried that by telling her any of what he was going through it would just make everything worse for her.
So, he didn't tell her anything. He didn't tell her about his dad leaving, he didn't tell her about his struggle in support his sister becoming more confident, he didn't tell her he ever got sad. She didn't need to know; he shouldn't bother her with his problems. They were completely inconsequential when it came to hers. She was having a much harder time than he was. She was stressed and in love and worried about people knowing who she really was. She was hurting and tired and trying not to break.
She showed him these parts of herself and in return Luka was there for her.
But he was frustrated because he still let her use him. He kept forgiving her, kept turning away when she chose Adrien over him but came to him crying later that day, he kept ignoring what all of those things made him feel so he could be there for her.
And now he was sorry he had ever let it happen.
Because it was for nothing. He got what he wanted. Marinette started dating him.
He never got what he wanted because he'd wanted Marinette to love him.
And she never loved him, she would never love him, and he was wasting his time waiting for her to come back. He was wasting his time waiting for her to choose him.
Then she broke up with him. She lied to him, pushed him aside, dated him while she loved someone else and yet… he couldn't bring himself to be the one to do it.
How much more of a coward could you be? The words he said to her after made his stomach turn. He didn't want to be there for her anymore, he didn't want to be her second choice, he didn't want to wait for her forever. And the way she looked at him after made him sick.
He could barely think of her sometimes without the memories of everything they did together rushing back. It was frustrating, knowing he let her upset him this way.
Marinette should be the last thing on his mind anyway. After his dad suddenly decided to come back and try to be a Father Luka wasn't sure what to think. Were people worth waiting on? Did he want to forgive his dad for leaving him for his career?
Luka wanted to forgive him, but at the same time he was angry. He had been second choice to a damn career. Jobs were important but his mom had given up her dream to be there for them and give him the best life she could. His father didn't even care enough to visit when he was in the same city. Just because he couldn't be there all the time didn't mean he had to leave completely.
And because Luka called him out once while akumatized he was suddenly more than happy to try to be a father? It didn't make sense in any way and made Luka angrier because if he could be here now why wasn't he always here?
He didn't talk about this to Juleka or Marinette or even his mom. He couldn't drag them down with what he was feeling. If he just kept this to himself, it would get better eventually. Right?
Chloe wasn't looking forward the arrival of her new sister. She had never had to share anything before, and she shouldn't have to start now. Why did she have to share this hotel with another girl, why did she have to share her parents with another girl, or anything else! They better not be expecting her to share her clothes or shoes or anything like that. Just because she and Zoe were around the same age didn't mean they were automatically going to become the best sisters ever. Chloe didn't even want a sister!
"This is utterly ridiculous." She huffed to herself. Why should she have to wait around in this stupid hotel just so she could be there to "greet her half-sister" as her father had said.
"What's his problem? How dare he treat me like some child who he can just tell to wait around. These days it's just Zoe this, Zoe that. Who frickin cares about frickin Zoe!" Chloe screamed into her pillow.
Before she'd even finished screaming, she heard a knock on the door and a butler entering to inform her Zoe had arrived. As if she cared. Either way she might as well go check this girl out to see exactly who she was competing with.
Chloe got up and took the elevator down to the lobby. If Zoe looked anything like her mother she had blonde hair. She probably had blue eyes too, but maybe not. Chloe couldn't really be sure. If she was anything like her mother she also had an eye for fashion and an overly critical attitude. Chloe could deal with that.
The elevator doors opened up and she followed the voice of her mother, who was speaking loudly as usually. She also heard another voice. This one was quieter, but she had the same tone as her mother, critical. If Chloe listened more carefully the critical tone sounded fake to her, and nothing compared to her mother's usual spite.
When Chloe entered the room and saw her half-sister for the first time, she was completely different than Chloe was expecting. She had blonde hair and blue eyes, yes. But other than that, the powerful clone of her mother she'd imagined inside her head promptly vanished.
Now she didn't know what to think. She felt disappointed, in a way since her expectations weren't met. In fact, Chloe's desire to know anything about her sister faded in that moment. Based on Zoe's demeanor, her clothing style, and the expression on her face, she looked just like Dupain-Cheng. And Chloe wasn't impressed. She didn't need a girl like Dupain-Cheng always up her butt. Marinette was already in her life far more than enough. She didn't want to associate with anyone else like her. She didn't want to associate with her or her friends, besides Adrien, and she didn't want to get to know anyone who would be just like her.
"So, you're Zoe." Chloe didn't say it any particular way, but Zoe was obviously bent on impressing her and her mother.
"Yeah, that's me, Zoe. And you are Chloe, right."
Chloe rolled her eyes, "Yep, blonde hair, blue eyes, fabulous. Who else would I be?" Chloe's eyes dipped to the bag of pastries in Zoe's hand. "Dupain-Cheng's?"
"I was just… uh, I just wanted to lead her on to think we could be friends. Poor girl has no idea how I really am. As if I would ever actually like something from her bakery."
"Right. So, how are you actually like? What're you going to reveal to Miserable Marinette?" Chloe didn't really care what her sister did considering she was just like Dupain-Cheng but, it was entertaining to watch Zoe squirm.
"That… I would never be friends with her. It was all an act. I'm throwing her stupid pastries away and letting her know exactly what I thought of them." Zoe fiddled with her fingers nervously.
"At school tomorrow, right?" Chloe wasn't sure if her mother had actually enrolled Zoe or if her father had but she didn't dare ask her mom about it. And she was still mad at her dad, so she wasn't talking to him right now.
"Yeah!"
"Hmm, okay. Well, as long as Dupain-Cheng remembers her place I don't think we'll have a problem."
"Um… right."
"Great! Why don't you come to my room so you can admire everything you can't touch." Chloe smiled at her sister, who nodded accordingly.
This girl she was competing with was almost sad competition. She had no chance of winning. Even if her father secretly liked her better or anything it wasn't like he was going to stop giving Chloe what she demanded. And once her mother realized Zoe was completely soft in nature, she would never win her affection. So, there was no need to worry. Even if everyone at school liked her better, even if the teachers or staff or Adrien liked her better, that didn't matter because she would beat Zoe every time when it came to winning their parents affection. And in her opinion, that mattered more then what some random people she didn't care about thought. Even if Adrien secretly liked her better, it wasn't like he would stop talking to her just because Zoe was around. Unlike her mother who would stop paying attention to Chloe if someone better came along. Someone like Dupain-Cheng. Zoe was like her, but she wasn't a fashion designer as far as Chloe knew, so it didn't count.
Chloe knew she had no friends. Even Sabrina just liked her because she bossed her around all the time, which was a little weird but she bossed her dad around too, so it wasn't uncommon. Maybe Chloe was just good at being the boss.
Even as Chloe was pulling out her things to show Zoe, finding a pair of ugly shoes she didn't want to give to her, Zoe wasn't really paying attention.
"Why don't you take those shoes outside. You can see them shimmer in the sunlight out there. And they're a huge improvement to whatever you're wearing." Chloe told her.
Chloe didn't really care what Zoe did but she felt like she needed a moment to herself, and Zoe kept doing whatever she wanted so it was easy to make a dumb excuse to get her away. What Chloe really wanted to do right now was go shopping. After hearing about Zoe all week didn't she deserve something nice? She didn't want to tell her parents though in case they made Zoe come with her. She decided she could go without telling them and it wouldn't matter. Since they were so obsessed with Zoe right now, they probably wouldn't even realize she was gone.
So, Chloe left and silently threatened Zoe because she better not touch any of Chloe's things while she was gone.
Hardly seeing Marinette was hard at first. But between practice, school, family, and his job he didn't really miss her as much as he thought he would. The first few days after the breakup were really hard on him. Luka noticed in the video he asked Juleka to take of a new song he'd written, he looked sad. He was pretty sure Juleka had noticed too, which had been his last intention. He didn't want her to worry about him, she had too much going on already. Luka was her older brother, and he should take care of her, she didn't need to be worrying about what he was feeling.
After a few days though, Luka felt better. His frustration and sadness died down until he just accepted it. Marinette would never love him, and he had essentially wasted his time trying to be with a girl who would only ever see him as a last choice. Luka had told her he would be waiting for her the night they broke up, which was overly emotional and could never be true.
Luka couldn't waste his life on a girl who would never love him. He'd already spent his whole life wondering if his own father loved him, he couldn't do that again.
Maybe he should tell her that. Did it even matter whether he told her? She probably wouldn't care that he couldn't be there for her like that ever again. After all, she was in love with Adrien so why would it matter to her whether he moved on?
To clear his head, Luka went on a walk. He stared at his phone for a long time because he wasn't sure who he could talk to about this. He could just reach a conclusion on his own but sometimes it was nice to have a second opinion.
Luka stood there, wondering before he sighed, "Who am I kidding. I'm never going to actually bring this up to anyone." Why was he even thinking he would text someone? These were just trivial questions he could answer himself, there was no need to bother anyone.
His thoughts got cut off when someone bumped into him. Luka stumbled a few steps back but managed to catch himself.
"Hey!" A feminine voice exclaimed.
Luka rubbed his shoulder and glanced down at the girl who bumped into him. She seemed more furious than someone who just bumped into someone else should be. "Watch where you're standing!"
"Uh… sorry?"
"Why are you saying that like it's a question! Ridiculous, this is utterly ridiculous!" The girl stood up, brushing herself off with a huff of annoyance.
"Because, well… you sort of bumped into me?"
"Yeah, because you didn't move! How was I supposed to know you were going to just stand there while I was walking?"
"You could've walked around me."
"As if I would move for you! Now pick up my bags!" she ordered.
"Uh…"
"Wait, never mind. If you touched them, it would ruin everything, and things won't get placed in the right bag." She glared at him like it was his fault she had to pick up her bags.
"Are you sure? I don't mind helping you." Luka bent down to reach for a bag but the look she sent him was so harsh he faltered.
"When I say I'll pick up my bags I'll pick them up! But… I suppose you can carry them."
"Carry them?" He asked. Did she mean she wanted him to carry them back to her house? It seemed like a dangerous thing to request from a complete stranger. "Are you sure?"
"Yes. If I didn't mean it, I wouldn't say it." She shoved the bags into his hands and whipped around, her ponytail almost smacking him in the face. He didn't bring up that she told him something just now only to change her mind.
"So… who are you?"
"Who am I?" She asked like he should know. "Don't you recognize the mayor's daughter?"
"Oh, so… you're Chloe, huh?" if Luka remembered what his sister told him correctly, Chloe was the spoiled daughter of the mayor who bullied everyone in her class and used her father's influence to get her way.
"Yes. The one and only." She smirked and turned to him, "I thought you actually weren't going to recognize me for a second. But of course you did. Everybody loves me."
"Actually, I know you because of my sister, Juleka."
"Jula who?"
"She's uh… in your class?" Maybe he had the wrong girl. But the mayor didn't have another daughter named Chloe, so she must be the one Jules talked about. It was more likely Chloe had forgotten about his sister. She was pretty quiet, Luka would admit, and Chloe didn't seem the type to remember many people.
"Right. So, your sister knows me? I mean, of course she does, I just didn't peg you as a brother." She said.
"We've known each other for five minutes."
"Well in those five minutes I judged you as an only child. Maybe I was wrong this once though."
"Maybe?" Luka said in disbelief.
"Maybe. Anyway, if you really are one of my classmates brother how come I've never seen you before."
"If you're really a classmate of my sisters how come I've never seen you before?" she glared at him, causing him to laugh.
"Are you mocking me!"
"No, of course not. You just surprised me. We simply just haven't met. You never came to my house with Juleka and the rest of her friends, so we never ran into each other."
Chloe looked suspiciously at him. "What's your name again?"
"I never said it actually. I'm Luka."
Chloe's look of suspicion turned to disgust almost instantly. "Oh, you're Dupain-Cheng's boyfriend." She said dismissively. "Should've known someone so disgustingly helpful had something to do with her."
She knew him as Marinette's boyfriend but not Juleka's brother? "Do you and Marinette talk often?" As far as he knew, Marinette disliked Chloe, so how would she know they dated?
"Her love life is all over the school. It's actually disgusting. I can't go anywhere without someone bringing up whether she should choose you or Adrikins. Honestly, who gives a fuck."
Luka rubbed the back of his neck nervously.
"Oh, actually, you probably give a fuck. But everyone else actually caring is weird. Besides maybe her stupid best friend."
"You don't have to talk about people like that."
"Oh please," Chloe rolled her eyes. "If you knew the girl, you'd wanna tell her to shut up too. No one needs to be that involved in someone else's love life."
"I guess that's true…"
"It's what she gets for making friends with a damn journalist. Even I could've told you they're just nosy little nobodies and I'm not even the mayor of Paris yet."
Luka didn't think that was a nice thing to say about journalists, even though they could be pushy. "You want to be the mayor one day like your father?" Luka asked, trying to change the subject away from Marinette and her friends… and reporters.
"No. I actually just want to marry rich, that way all the journalists are up his butt and not mine." Chloe said, glancing at her nails. "Not that you need to know, Dupain-Cheng's boyfriend."
"It's Luka. And… I'm not her boyfriend."
"Oh really?" She sounded interested for some reason. "Why not, she dump you for Adrikins?" Luka didn't say anything and just kept walking, allowing Chloe to draw her own conclusions. "Oh my god she did. Cold hearted, even for me." Chloe seemed to be excited about the new information, regardless of the fake pout she had on her face. "Oh, you poor boy. Looks like Marinette's broken someone else's heart." She didn't sound sympathetic at all but that wasn't what made Luka frown.
"Someone else's?"
"What, like you were the first boy to hop into Dupain-Cheng love train. There was at least like three other boys before you. And she broke all their hearts for Adrien. Seems like she led you on a bit longer than the others."
"Marinette didn't lead anyone on. She's a good person."
"Mhm, yeah, she's an angel." That sounded fake too, especially since Luka knew how much Chloe hated Marinette, but she didn't sound too malicious when she stated that either. "So, you're saying that she didn't start dating you to try and deny her feelings for Adrien?"
Luka couldn't say anything because she was right, but he didn't want her to know that. By not saying anything though he already said everything. She smirked again, knowing she was right, and paused in front of a very large hotel. She turned to face him with a small huff. "Well then Luka, Mr. Dupain-Cheng's ex, looks like we're here. So, I, will take my bags, and then you can go beg Marinette to take you back, sound good?"
Luka handed her the bags, trying not to let his shoulders slump. Her words stuck to him. Did he really come off like the type of person who was so desperate for Marinette's affection that he would beg her to take him back?
Didn't he already say it though? Didn't he tell her he would be there when she wanted him? "I… I told her I would be there for her when she wanted me, do you think I should tell her I take it back?"
"Well duh." Luka looked up, startled by the straightforwardness in her statement. She rolled her eyes like it was obvious. "Sounds fucked up. Don't go waiting for someone to love you." She paused like she remembered something before continuing, "I mean I wouldn't. I'm totally fabulous."
Luka smiled before he realized what he just told her. "Sorry for dumping my problems on you." He was a total idiot; he completely just wasted her time. He wasn't supposed to tell any of that to anyone and usually he was more controlled than this.
"Well, it isn't much of a problem if the solution is obvious. You're ridiculous, utterly ridiculous." She glared at him, turned up her nose at him and strutted away with five bags on each arm.
Luka sighed and turned around back towards his house. He knew what he needed to tell Marinette. She loved Adrien though, so telling her he couldn't allow himself to love her like that anymore shouldn't be a problem… it shouldn't.
Chloe slammed the door to the hotel shut and hurried to a private area with no guests loitering around to just breathe for a moment. She was glad her conversation with that boy ended when it did because something she'd said had made her think too hard about something else.
She'd told that boy not to wait around for Dupain-Cheng of all people, that no one should have to wait around for someone to love you. But… hadn't she been doing that with her mother. Chloe started shaking slightly.
Constantly trying to impress her, and gain her love, and be just like her so she would finally feel loved by her. It was different though, right? She wasn't waiting around for just anyone's love, this was her own mother she was thinking about. It was different.
It was different. It was different. It was different.