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Dean can feel Cas’s hands running through his hair as Cas once again explains the complicated paperwork that's due in the upcoming month. There are so many dates to remember and too many papers to keep track of, especially before coffee. He is glad that Cas is very well prepared and has created an overly anal organization system and large whiteboard calendar that he can even see from where they are lying in bed. Dean is on the verge of falling back asleep when he realizes that Cas has moved on to next month’s to-do list already. It hadn’t registered that a week from today is the beginning of October until now. Where has all the time gone?
Dean once again realizes he is drifting off to the soothing sound of Cas’s deep morning voice. This time though he is imagining the childhood he never had. He is running through a corn maze chasing a young Sammy, carving Jack-o-lanterns with his dad’s supervising eye, raking piles of colorful leaves to jump into and wrestle with Sam, and watching classic horror movies without any fear. Slowly the dream morphs into his reality. No longer is he watching the horror movie, he is the person being pursued by a monster and gets caught just to be beaten and held down for Allistair to use him how he wishes before releasing him to begin the chase again.
Next thing he knows someone is shaking him awake. How could he have fallen asleep like that when he was expected to be alert? He begins to panic and jerks away from the person holding him. He shouldn’t even be on the bed. He rolls off and ends up getting his leg caught on the blankets stumbling to right himself before his punishment gets worse. He shouldn’t have tried to run away. That always made the inevitable punishment worse. He is beginning to lose his vision. Is he breathing too fast? He should try to calm down before he passes out from hyperventilating. Allistair never liked him to be unconscious for his punishments.
He takes a deep breath to try to slow down his breathing and get his fear under control. He surprisingly smells comfort and worry that is worsening with every deep breath. Alastair enjoyed Dean’s fear. Why would he be worried? It all comes rushing back to him that he is safe and not in Hell anymore. Cas was the one trying to wake him from his bad dream and is now staring at him with concern.
Dean finally looks up and makes eye contact which Cas knows means that he is back in the present. Dean slowly makes his way back into the bed where Cas is waiting with open arms and smells of home, safety, and just a hint of worry and fear left in the air.
Finally, Cas breaks the silence. “Would you like to talk about it?”
Cas lets Dean take his time to answer knowing that he is still trying to process it himself. After a few comfortable moments of silence, Dean responds, “I was dreaming that I had a normal childhood with Sammy. I was enjoying the freedom of being a child and celebrating Halloween with all the classic traditions I was never able to do. We moved around too much to ever know the neighborhood well enough to go trick or treating and of course Dad never left us enough money or took us to any of the fall carnivals or pumpkin patches. It was all hopeful memories before suddenly the scary movie we were watching turned into a nightmare. I was back in Hell trying to run away.”
“I assumed such which is why I was trying to wake you, but I guess I should've been more gentle.”
After a few reflective minutes of silence, Cas once again breaks it and begins to talk about his own childhood. “I never had a normal Halloween either. I was taken trick or treating by a nanny a few times as a child, but never really enjoyed it. I think if I had been with someone who I was closer to, then it could have been fun, but I never bonded with any of my nannies well enough before they inevitably would quit or be fired. I also have never been to a fall carnival or pumpkin patch or done any of the traditional fall activities one would do with their family during the Halloween season.” He hesitates before continuing in a gentler mumble, “Neither of us had the ideal childhood and we both had to grow up too fast, you more than I.”
Dean leaned closer into Cas as he was talking and can smell a faint sadness which makes him never want to let go. “We could experience it together,” Dean mumbles into Cas’s collarbone.
Cas hums in an affirming way before letting the silence once again wash over them. They lay there cuddled together for a large chunk of the morning before Dean’s stomach starts to rumble, reminding them both that life outside of the comfort of the bed wouldn’t wait forever.
Two weeks later Dean brings up the subject of Halloween again while they are sitting down for breakfast. “Would you like to try to create some new memories together this year? I was thinking we could go to the pumpkin patch and get some pumpkins to carve this afternoon. That is if you didn’t already have something planned. We can also do something else if you would prefer.”
“Dean, you know I would be more than happy to make some better memories with you. All you had to do was ask.” Cas leans over and affectionately wipes some stray jam from Dean’s face. “How about we leave here at one and make it a date to celebrate your coming freedom. We can go pick out some pumpkins at a nearby farm. Then we can come back home and carve them while watching a classic Halloween cartoon or children’s movie. Sound good?”
“Yeah, but you only gave me a few hours to research what to bake with all the pumpkin remains and to decide what I want to carve so don’t expect to see me again until noon.” Dean proceeds to quickly take his plate to the sink before disappearing to his room to do some research.
Cas remains at the table excited to smell the content freshness that washed over Dean drowning out any anxiousness from asking for what he wanted. He really is proud of how far he has come. To think that eight months ago he had not been able to even look into Cas’s eyes and was terrified to do anything without a direct order. Now he is able to ask for what he wants while sitting in a chair across from him at the table. He is so proud of Dean and the strength he has regained. Cas is so deeply in love with the man who just ran off like a child excited to get to carve pumpkins. He can’t wait for the end of the month when Dean can fully consent to being his boyfriend or maybe even his mate as a free man.
After Cas did some of the final paperwork to finish Dean’s application for freedom, he does some research on nearby pumpkin patches that are omega friendly. He finds one that was a twenty-minute drive which Dean fills by discussing the different designs he wishes to carve and all the fresh, moist pumpkin treats he had found recipes for. Dean's excited to make and take pumpkin pies and muffins to the center to show off his baking skills to his class.
Cas really is shocked by all the progress Dean has made. He's found so many new interests like baking and has rekindled some old interests like sparring and working on cars. Dean is ready to be a part of society again and in the process has found himself and the things he enjoyed.
Once they pull up to the parking lot of the pumpkin patch Dean is practically vibrating in his seat and Cas can smell nothing but glee in the scent of the omega sitting beside him. Dean runs out and grabs one of the wagons sitting next to the entrance before running ahead of Cas to start finding the perfect pumpkins. Cas takes a slower time getting out of the car and chuckles as he attempts to catch up to the grown man running through the pumpkins like a small child.
Dean already has three pumpkins in his wagon and somehow also has mud all over him already. As soon as Cas caught up, Dean starts ranting about the future uses each pumpkin would have, “The tall one is going to be a classic jack-o-lantern. The wide white one is going to be Baby. And the large one is going to be Batman.”
If Cas could see Dean like this every day he would be willing to do anything for Dean. Dean has a smile on his face so big, he could rival the big blow-up jack-o-lantern at the entrance to the pumpkin patch. Dean has moved on to picking out some smaller pumpkins for the decoration of the house. Cas thus decides he should grab a couple for himself to carve, so he won’t ruin any of Dean’s plans for the pumpkins he picked out. Cas is thinking maybe a beehive with a small bee and then an owl.
Once he finds the pumpkins for himself and returned to the wagon, there is no space to set them down. Dean filled it up and was now counting them all to see if he has enough. After a few minutes of Dean swapping a few of his picks out and adding a few more he finally decides he is done. Cas wraps his arm around the happy omega and they set off to the stand near the entrance to pay for their pumpkins.
After Dean gives the attendant the number of pumpkins of each size, the man responds to Cas with an amount that is more money than Dean has ever held in his hand or owned in his life. Dean immediately starts trying to get Cas’s attention to tell him he doesn’t need all of the pumpkins, and he could put some back, but Cas is not paying attention to Dean. Cas is in conversation with the attendant talking about what else to do while they are here. Dean knows his place and decides not to interrupt two alphas and gives up on trying to get Cas’s attention. He will have to talk to Cas about it in private so he doesn't seem like a pushy, undisciplined omega slave that doesn't know his place.
Cas finally finishes his conversation and starts towards the car. Dean follows at a respectable distance behind him without a word. Cas looks back and decides that something was suddenly wrong based on Dean’s smell and sudden shift in behavior.
“Hey, what’s up? Did you forget a pumpkin or change your mind?”
Dean shakes his head and continues to walk without looking Cas in the eyes.
Cas stops and gently lifts Dean’s chin so he will look at him, “We can go back and look at more. I was also planning on going to the barn to look around and maybe get some cider while we’re here. I just thought it would be easier to put the pumpkins in the car so we aren’t having to carry them around with us. Are you sure you are okay? You do know you can tell me what is going on in your brain.”
Dean starts tearing up and leans into Cas for comfort. “I didn’t mean to cost you so much money. I won’t ask for anything else all month. I’ll be good. I can make it up to you somehow. We can return some of the-”
Cas muffles Dean’s sobs as he grips him tighter. “It’s alright Dean. We’ve been over this, I have enough money to spoil you. I enjoy seeing you happy and think you are worth every dollar I just spent and so much more. You are worthy of my love and I wish to give it to you. There is nothing you could or should do to make up for the money I spent. I was more than willing to pay double, triple, ten times that much to see one smile on your face. Instead, I got to see a smile bigger than I have ever seen and now have good memories of Halloween and will continue to make more all day. You and your happiness are priceless to me and I will continue to show you that as long as you will let me.”
Dean slowly looks up at Cas and gives him a kiss on the cheek before muttering his thanks as he leans further into Cas’s embrace.
Cas reaches down and dries the tears off Dean’s cheeks and leads them to the car so they can continue their day of celebrating Dean’s upcoming freedom and continue to make memories for Dean to replace the shadows in his mind.