Work Text:
James Potter, captain of the football team, class clown, and resident “heartthrob” Regulus always found it odd that James was considered a heartthrob considering he never actually dated anyone, he was always too busy hanging out with his group to even notice girls.
Don’t get Regulus wrong, James was pretty, not handsome, pretty, he didn’t have sharp features, he seemed soft. His eyes sparked when James talked about something he was passionate about. You should’ve seen him last year during Diwali when someone asked him why he was in such a good mood.
James had loving parents, he had never been let down in his life, he had supportive friends, and he was virtually loved by everybody in the school, including teachers. James was a people pleaser, maybe that’s why Sirius, Regulus’ older brother, and James got on like a house fire, Sirius lived to defy and James lived to please, they kept each other in line.
A booming laugh comes from the direction of the Marauders, a group that consisted of James Potter, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, and Peter Pettigrew, nobody really understood the friendship dynamic of the four boys, they were all so different but so similar at the same time. Everyone quickly realized why three of the four were laughing. Sirius was on one knee proposing to the principal, Dumbledore, for the overseer of the school he goes along with far too many of the group's antics. James took a sip of his Irn-Bru before continuing to talk.
“Awe come on Pads, you’re gonna make Remy jealous.” Remus, the book-nerd stoner, hit James over the back of his head with some novel that Regulus thinks could be Jane Austen but he can’t tell for sure.
“Oi! What was that for?”
“I don’t get jealous.”
“Of course you don’t, you just get possessive.”
“Shut it.” Remus rolled his eyes and continued to go back to reading his book.
James looked up and saw Regulus staring, James gave him a genuine smile, and winked, he gestured down to his phone to say that Regulus should look at his phone. The nice thing about your older brother being best friends with James Potter is that James knows how to go about things. James knows that the Blacks monitor all text, he knows the code words, he knows the appropriate hours to text and he knows not to ask questions, that’s what always throws Regulus through a loop, James doesn’t just care about Sirius, he doesn’t just talk to Regulus because he’s friends with Sirius, he checks up on Regulus, invites him to holidays, refuses to even have phones in the same room as him and Regulus when he knows something needs to be kept private.
James: This math homework is super confusing, do you think you could help?
Regulus knew exactly what this meant: James wanted to meet in the abandoned math classroom on the third floor for a reason he couldn’t explain over text.
Regulus: Yeah, just let me know when.
James: Five minutes? It’s almost lunch.
Regulus knew that James was on his lunch break now but Regulus’ parents would kill him if they found out he was using his free period to do anything but study.
Regulus: Sounds good.
James looked at Regulus, giving him a smirk, he made an excuse to clean up his food, probably something along the lines of needing to finish math homework before class.
As Regulus walked up the stairs he couldn’t help but smile, it was silly but James was simple, exactly what Regulus needed. Regulus thought of their first kiss, the rain pounding down on the car as Fleamont and Sirius ran around trying to find a gas station. James and Regulus were laughing at a stupid joke. James asking Regulus if he could keep a secret, Regulus saying that he could. James leaning in to kiss him and all felt right in that moment as though time stopped. Nothing mattered, he wasn’t Regulus Black heir to whatever, he wasn’t Regulus Black, Sirius Black’s younger brother, he was just Regulus, the boy kissing James freaking Potter. Maybe that’s why Regulus never believed the rumors of James being a heartthrob, of him going on dates with whatever girl asked.
When Regulus approached the empty classroom he quietly opened the door as to not draw attention to himself.
“Finally! You took forever!”
“It was like three minutes if that and you said five.”
“Exactly, forever!”
“You are ridiculous.”
“Are you going to help me with my math homework or not?”
“Not freaking out over phones this time?”
“Is yours shut off?”
“Yes.”
“Then we’re good.” James kissed his cheek, kissing down his jawline down to his neck. James was smiling the entire time.
“Don’t leave any marks,” Regulus said shortly.
“Are you mad at me?” James pulled back, a weird mix of worried and hurt in his smoky quartz-colored eyes.
“Of course not, it’s just I’ve been thinking,”
“That’s always dangerous,” James said, trying to make a joke.
“Why don’t we go to that diner tonight? You know the one that's 50's themed.”
“Oh! That sounds fun!” James seemed genuinely excited about the idea but Regulus really wished he didn’t.
“Okay, right after school I already told mum that I’m tutoring, I know you said your parents were out of town but maybe after the diner.”
“Sounds perfect, we still have ten minutes left.” Regulus never wanted to hurt James but it seemed as though it’s just how life works. Regulus knew whatever they were doing wouldn’t and couldn’t last forever. They couldn’t date even though that’s practically what they were doing but with Regulus’s parents, it was almost impossible. Regulus went over to family dinners at the Potter’s every Friday, he always got invited to the family holidays, Sirius would come over with them and would normally leave with Remus. He and James curled up by the fire after a long day in the cold. Those memories were always fond to Regulus but they just don’t work. Regulus can’t have a normal happy life. It just wasn’t in his family's plan. Sirius had already been kicked out, he lived with James, Regulus was the golden child, he couldn’t stretch whatever they were doing for much longer, or else it would end in even more hurt.
~~
“If you had to put a label on what we are, what would it be?” Regulus asked, he had a cherry soda in front of him while James was sipping on his Irn-Bru.
Regulus thinks he should cut down on his soda intake for how much of an athlete James was but James never seemed to care. If that wasn’t the story of their lives, one of them wanted something and the other didn’t want to change.
“Why do you ask?”
“Because I like to know things.”
“I don’t know Reg, fun?” James gave a tiny smirk, he looked smug but not in a bad way.
“Okay well, I think we need to stop having fun.”
“Why?”
“We just don’t fit.”
“Why don’t we fit?” Regulus couldn’t bear to look at the other boy after he heard his voice cracking.
“Regulus, look at me. Are you okay?” The cherry soda and Irn Bru were long forgotten.
“I’m a jerk.”
“No, if this is how you feel then you aren’t being a jerk, I just don’t understand.”
“You look lonely Reg,”
“You don’t even know me James.”
“Bullshit, how? I know you, I do.”
“Not where it matters. Even if we did work, even if this...whatever was perfect it still wouldn’t work out and you know it!”
“I’m sorry,” James whispers.
“So am I, but I’m going to go because we are too different, I’m going before I make it worse.”
“What if we try again, properly this time.”
Regulus shook his head slowly, “this is for the best.” James looked around before gently kissing him one last time.
“This was fun, maybe if we were different people if it was a different time.”
“I wouldn’t trade a second of what we did for someone else.”