Work Text:
Dear Kayn,
Bottle up the pain
Let it rain and wash away
Let it carry you to a better place
And forget my name
As if in a compulsion, Kayn read the lines over and over. Lines that Zed didn't seem to want him to take more then five minutes for. He was never one for many words but this was his farewell. Farewell to him.
My mind often wanders back
To the fools we used to be
What's left?
Nothing but memories
Yes, Kayn knows that a part of him lived in the past too. He knew that this could not last forever but he never thought that the time would be now. The time flashed by as he stared onto the white piece of paper, tried to find something to hold on to. He sighed in frustration and pound against the massiv wood table they had chosen together but no sound was heard.
A shell of who you used to be
Is this a consequence of never chasing dreams?
Slowly you're sinking
Locked in a cage, no way to breathe
The only truth Zed wanted to know. Kayn tried over and over again and again to convince him that he was neither trapped nor sinking. That he would rather leave the world then him. No matter what potential he has. What Rhaast sees in him. The only opertunity to live for him was Zed. With him in independence. But to do so he had to face Rhaast. He had to face his Fate, to become the men who would be able to stand side by side with Zed.
I'm wishing for a change that will never come
I'll rewrite the past so you will never be replaced
Tears streamed down his face and he tried to see what Zed has written but his vision keeps getting blurry. What chance he waited for. Kayn was right here, right fucking now. Zed left. Never be replaced? As if there will ever be a possibility for Kayn to do so. Noone will ever be able to replace him. Replace what they had.
And I know your hands were tied
Your fate was set, put on your bravest smile
Now do we have to look back?
I'm reaching out and it's all for you
As if Zed could still see him, Kayn smiled. He smiled so bright that his cheeks hurt. He smiled, not in happiness. He smiled and his face ached in pain. His fate was meaningless without him. His fate was to be with him. If there was one thing in this world he knew, this was it. He touched his numb cheeks and remembered the soft touch of Zeds hands on him.
I still remember
I remember the night you called
I felt the warmth in your voice
You were happy, I was happy for you
Oh, how happy they were together. Memories flashed by and Kayn felt like he travels trough time. Memories of warm summer nights under the dark sky when they were together, body's united as there were never to be parted. Memories of small words of acknowledgement when Kayn did well as his acolyte. The first suffering in Zeds eyes when he could not resist to the power of Rhaast and half of him got corrupted. The sheer desperation when Kayn got hit by his own weapon. And the warmth of Zeds body as he spend all his Energy to him. To safe him.
I've come to terms with letting go
Had time to think things through
Dear love, You'll live this life for two
As I've lived this life for you
I'm reaching out and it's all for you
- Zed