Chapter Text
How strange that everything in this city is ours but never yours or mine alone.
TWO YEARS AGO:
"I think...we should call it off."
"Call it off," you repeated, your throat dry. Your fork slipped out of your hand and clattered onto the plate, attracting the attention of a few neighboring tables. But it went unnoticed by you, the pounding of your heart in your ears drowning out all other sounds. You scanned Kita's face desperately, and although his expression remained as unreadable as ever, you felt your stomach sinking anyway. Maybe it was because you'd been with him for so long or maybe it was just a gut feeling, but you seemed to predict his next words before he even opened his mouth.
"It's not...working between us, is it, (Y/N)?" he asked you, his brown eyes locking directly with yours. His voice was quiet, just barely audible over the classical music in the background but they stung.
Not working. It's not working between you two. Unable to face him, you averted your eyes to the pasta in front of you. Just a moment ago, you'd silently praised the chef for their excellent seasoning abilities but now, even the memory of the last bite you had was turning flavorless. "I...I don't know."
But you did know. You'd had a hunch that this was coming for a while now to be honest. His late nights at the office, his rushes to leave in the morning, the exhaustion in his features when he came back home, too tired to stay up with you. Even today was the first time you two had gone out to eat in almost a month. You'd known it was coming, but somehow, you still hadn't been prepared to hear it.
"You should...find someone else," Kita said softly. "You'll be happier with someone else."
Your thoughts scrambled around your head, blurring and meshing with each other incoherently. In the end, all of them died in your throat. You didn't know how to ask him to stay, how to ask him what was wrong, how to ask him what you were supposed to change. You were in love with him. Wasn't he in love with you? Weren't the two of you in love with each other?
How could you make him stay when he doesn't want to though? A voice in your head asked. Isn't that unfair of you to trap him in a relationship he's clearly sick of? Isn't that why he's been spending so much time away from you recently?
You'd always thought it was a miracle that you'd ended up with somebody like Kita. The bone that the universe had tossed you after working so hard for so long. Proof that everything had turned out alright. You used to dream about going back to your younger self and introducing her to Kita to prove that everything would eventually work out.
You supposed that you were still waiting for them to work out.
"Okay," you said, after a long pause and shot him a forced smile. It'd be embarrassing, if Kita were to remain so cool and nonchalant about this and you were to burst into tears in the middle of this restaurant. At the very least, you shouldn't make this scene any more painful than it already was. "Thank you. For...everything I guess."
His lips parted ever-so-slightly, but he immediately gave you a small smile. "Yeah. I hope everything goes well for you, (Y/N). I'll take care of the check."
"No, it's okay," you tried to say, but Kita had already waved down the waiter and handed his card over.
You scrambled to grab cash out of your purse to pay him back with, but Kita stopped you, his expression as unreadable as ever. "Don't. I can at least do this much for you."
"Ah." Was it worth protesting? This was likely the last time you'd ever see him again, so you doubted that there would be much value in stopping him from paying for your meal one last time. You'd probably need the money to buy yourself a mountain of desserts after this anyway. "Thank you."
What else were you supposed to say to somebody you had just broken up with? Have a nice life? You honestly didn't even know what you were supposed to do right now. Walk away? Block his number? You didn't know if the two of you were even ending on bad terms, but you really, really didn't want to see him again. How could you face him knowing that he clearly no longer had feelings for you?
"I'm sorry things worked out this way," he told you, as the two of you got up to leave the restaurant. You knew he probably wasn't lying. Lying had never been Kita's thing. But you wanted to yell that if he was sorry, then he should've done something to stop things from working out this way. Maybe you should've done something.
But all you could muster up in that moment was a small, "Me too."
"Maybe we'll run into each other again someday," Kita said. You hoped not. A bad part of you wanted to say it. To say that you never wanted to see him again, knowing that this was an unrequited love. You wouldn't be able to stand seeing him again. But you didn't.
"See you," you said instead.
And with one final nod, he turned away and left. Each step took him further and further away from you, and closer and closer to being strangers.
THE PRESENT:
"All the manuscripts in Pile A have been organized and reviewed based on the potential ratings, but I've only briefly scanned through Pile B," you said, shuffling the papers on your desk around. "I think we can go forward and email back the author of the horror manuscript saying that we're interested in a publishing deal with them, but we need more time to decide on the others since the budget reallocation hasn't been finalized yet."
"What would you like me to do?" asked Yachi, one of the new interns at your publishing company. She stood up with her back completely straight, as if she were being disciplined by the military. Her enthusiasm made you chuckle.
"If you would be able to deliver these to the chief editor, that'd be great," you said, passing on a stack of papers to her.
Yachi took them eagerly. "Right away!" she said, before hurrying off towards the elevators.
Next to you, your coworker Sugawara laughed at Yachi's behavior as well. "The new hires are always so cute, aren't they?"
"Mm. Very alive and passionate," you agreed, the corners of your lips flickering upwards. "Was I like that when I first joined?"
"Not quite, but you were close to Yachi's level," Sugawara said. He then waggled his eyebrows at you. "Some would say that you never did change too."
"Shut up," you huffed as Sugawara laughed at his own joke. You threw a paperclip at him though it bounced harmlessly off of his arm.
It was already your second year working at this publishing firm, in a city that was a four hour drive away from the one you'd previously lived in with Kita. The breakup was long behind you at this point, but you had yet to return to your previous city.
It was hard to say whether or not you'd truly moved on though. You now lived in a different city and ran in a different circle of people, meaning that you no longer thought about Kita nearly as much as you used to, but you didn't know whether that was because you'd truly moved on or if you were sufficiently distracted. After all, in a place so far away, there were no longer any reminders of him.
"Well, it sure does look like it's going to rain soon," Kuroo commented as he walked into the office space and set his umbrella against the side of his desk. You glanced out the window and sure enough, stormy dark clouds were beginning to gather along the horizon. An ominous feeling crept up your spine but you brushed it away. There was no need to panic just because there was going to be a little rain tonight. "Have you all come prepared?"
"It'll probably just be a light drizzle," you said, unfazed by the weather. "Rain here never lasts long anyway."
"Ah ah ah." Kuroo clicked his tongue and wagged his finger at you. "The rain tonight is going to be quite the downpour."
Sugawara glanced up, looking equally as bewildered by Kuroo's confidence as you were. "And how would you know this?"
"I have a hunch." The black-haired male shot the two of you a wink before sauntering off in the direction of the break room.
You gazed back out the window. "Well, I don't know about how accurate Kuroo's hunches are, but maybe it would've been a good idea to bring an umbrella today."
"Really? I always keep one of these bad boys in my desk," Sugawara said, before bending down and pulling out a poncho from underneath his desk. The sight of Sugawara triumphantly holding up his plastic, reusable poncho made you laugh. "You think it's funny now, but they really are handy."
"Right. Truly a necessary investment." You gave him a smile and shook your head before returning to your work.
After your recent promotion, it was only natural that you were swamped with more work than usual. By the time you finished, it was almost dinnertime and the rain had been pouring for quite some while. It appeared that Kuroo had been right. Rather than the drizzle you had assumed it would be, the rain had come down in unrelenting torrents, tapping relentlessly against your office window. Almost everyone else had left for the day, so you didn't have anybody you could ask for a ride home. Biting your lip, you considered whether it would be possible to wait out the storm before having to walk outside.
With how dark the clouds outside were however, it didn't seem like the rain had any intentions of stopping anytime soon. Would you just have to brave the storm? The nearest bus stop was only two blocks away and then you would be able to take shelter underneath the bus stop. You could make it, you reasoned with yourself.
And with that, you gathered all your belongings and stepped outside. Under the outdoor office canopy, you took a deep breath and immediately sprinted for it. Around you, people were also recklessly sprinting towards their destination, having been caught off guard by the rain as well.
"I never thought there'd be a day where I was jealous of Kuroo Tetsurou," you muttered under your breath as you did your best not to slip on the various puddles forming on the sidewalk. A short while later, you made it to your bus stop and collapsed onto the bench to catch your breath. "When's the next bus coming?"
To your horror however, when you looked at the bus schedule, you found a sign reading: Unfortunately, no buses will be running from March 21st-March 23rd due to a bus strike.
March 21st? Wasn't that today? You checked your watch and felt dread sink into your stomach as the watch flashed the exact date back at you. Why hadn't you thought to check the buses before running out here? Then again, you supposed you couldn't have been blamed for this happening. It was rare for the buses in this city to stop running for such a prolonged period of time after all.
"Ugh." You buried your face in your hands, unsure of what to do. If you'd remembered correctly, the news had been saying that all the subways were closed because of flooding, so the only options you had right now were to either walk or call a car service.
You'd managed to make friends in your time in this city, but you didn't know any of them well enough to call them to help you out at the moment. Did you have enough...? You dug through your bag but only had five dollars bill, not nearly enough to call for a taxi.
"Have I done something wrong?" you asked up to the unforgiving universe above you. It made no answer, only leaving you to stew in your misfortune with the rain cascading down around you.
With no choice, you forced yourself to stand up and begin the trudge home. Your apartment was too far to run home effectively, and since you were getting drenched anyway, you decided it wasn't worth it to hurry back.
At least the rain wasn't freezing. The universe had been kind enough to grant you that small mercy. But still, your clothes were now effectively plastered to your skin, and you were sure that you looked like a drowned rat roaming the city streets. At the next intersection, you pressed the pedestrian crossing button, leaned against the pole, and closed your eyes, exhausted from work and the disastrous weather. Before you could stop them, tears begun streaming down your cheeks from both frustration and fatigue.
Pitter-patter, pitter-patter, pitter...? Suddenly, you couldn't feel the rain against your face anymore. You opened your eyes blearily and wiped the tears off of your cheeks with your sleeve, realizing that there was now a clear umbrella being held over your head. You looked over towards the owner, only to be met with a familiar face you hadn't seen in years.
Kita looked every bit as beautiful as the day he left you, his black trench coat framing his slender figure well, his hair parted slightly to one side, and his eyes still as warm as you remembered. His umbrella was angled so that it was protecting both you and him from the rain above. His cheeks were full of color and his lips were as plump and luscious—you inwardly cursed yourself for staring at them.
You on the other hand, were well aware of how disastrous you appeared at the moment. Your white blouse was completely soaked through—you realized belatedly that this meant everyone could see your bra—and your hair hung in unflattering wet strands in front of your face. Actually...didn't this mean that Kita had seen you crying? Judging by the way that Kita was staring at you with concern written all over his features, this appeared to be the case.
"It's the rain," you said, voice cracking slightly as you spoke. Your eyes were puffy and your nose was red and there was no way that Kita could possibly believe that the water droplets on your cheek were solely from the rain, but the corners of his lips lifted into a gentle smile.
"I believe you."
He shouldn't believe you. Anyone with eyes would be able to tell that you were lying, but hearing those words fall from his lips somehow made everything feel just a little less miserable. Was it bad that he still had that effect on you?
"It's been a while, (Y/N)," he said softly. "How've you been?"
Maybe the universe really was punishing you.