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It was Ichimonji Hayato’s birthday, literally the most important day of the year and yes that includes Christmas.
Today our very special birthday boy was hoping for a wonderful surprise: a brand new camera.
So he goes to Tachibana’s Racing Club to see all his friends. When he gets there he sees Tachibana, Hongo, Taki, Goro, Yuri, and like, 3 random girls that all had two syllable names that he wouldn’t see again after today.
“It’s my birthday.” Says Hayato, but they all ignore him because his birthday was never established in the show and last time he had a birthday, he had to fight a toad monster.
“It’s my birthday.” Hayato says again, as if to remind the cast that they have to celebrate his birthday because they are in a fanfic about his birthday.
“Woah, happy birthday, Mr. Hayato!” says Goro who is also preoccupied with a paddleball. He falls one short of the world record and groans. Taki laughs and ruffles his hair.
“Sorry, we forgot to get you a present.” Hongo admits, probably because he actually forgot. When you fight for justice and aren’t a human anymore because you are a cyborg, you tend to forget birthdays. In fact, Hongo forgot his own birthday. Because he is a cyborg.
“But we can get you a present!” says Yuri. “Tachibana-san can pay for it, just tell us what you want and we’ll get it for you!”
“I want a new camera.” Hayato says, adjusting his cowboy hat. “Since I gave Hongo my only one before going to South America so you guys could all remember me.”
“Right.” Taki says, nervously. Mainly because he didn’t need the camera to remember Hayato, but also because he forgot Hayato existed, like, a month later.
Hongo is notably sweating. “Oh, yeah. That. I wonder where that went.”
The camera cuts to a flashback where Hayato hands Hongo his camera.
“Here,” says flashback Hayato, “My only camera. For everyone to remember me by.”
Flashback Hongo accepts the camera and sadly watches flashback Hayato get on the airplane to South America. He then immediately bashes the camera into the skull of a Shocker combatman, destroying both instantly.
The flashback ends.
“Probably under my bed.” Hongo muses aloud, still sweating.
“I’m not buying a camera.” Says Tachibana, “I have to finish paying off all these pigeons Hongo told me to buy.”
As if on cue, a pigeon lands with no note attached. Clearly this must be trouble!
“Oh no!” Yuri exclaims, grabbing the pigeon and checking the number on it. “This belonged to a Rider Scouts kid! He must be in trouble!”
“We’ll go check it out.” Hayato says, waving for Hongo and Taki to come along. Though he is disappointed that he’ll have to fight another monster for his birthday. Goro follows them out, still hitting his paddleball and counting under his breath.
The 3 men and Goro ride to a quarry where they find a monster that looks to be a combination of a flounder and a labrador retriever. There is also some random unnamed child in a Rider Scouts uniform being terrorized by this monster, but he’s not important. It’s Hayato’s birthday, that’s important.
“Oh boy!” Hayato says, glancing over the monster. “An abomination! This is so much better than fighting a giant toad!”
“I am the Destron mutant Floundlabber!” says the monster who is apparently the Destron mutant Floundlabber.
“I have no idea what any of that means, but you are clearly an enemy of justice!” says Hongo, pointing manly. Goro is still paddling.
Taki does a backflip and vaults through the air, scooping up the random Rider Scouts kid and pulling him to safety. A bunch of Destron combatmen come out and Taki begins to do amazing feats of athleticism to destroy them. Hayato and Hongo wonder if they should even henshin to help fight, Taki seems to really have this. Goro is still paddling.
“Seriously, what is a Destron…?” Hayato asks, looking into the camera. The director, Mr. Ishinomori flips through the script and realizes that he has the wrong one and this was supposed to be a V3 episode. He then shrugs and tosses the script over his shoulder.
“Just adlib.” Says Mr. Ishinomori.
“Okay. I’ll defeat you, Destron!” says Hayato and then he flexes to reveal his Rider belt. Hongo does the same, but his mouth doesn’t move during the entire transformation process.
“Henshin!” they both yell, albeit half dubbed over.
Goro is still paddling.
Floundlabber charges at the Double Riders, spraying foam and fire from his mouth. Hayato flings a combatman in the way and watches him dissolve into a pile of foam that promptly catches on fire and explodes.
Hongo punches the monster in the face and soon the Double Riders get into a pretty standard fight with the monster which involves a lot of back and forth punching, kicking, and rolling each other around in the dirt. At some point, Floundlabber has had enough and moves to put distance between him and the Riders. Once he’s done that, he points his hand, which looks like a normal flounder, and launches it at the Riders.
The launched hand is infact a flounder bomb which explodes when it makes contact with the Riders.
“Haha! I’ve won!” cheers Floundlabber. Goro is still paddling.
However, once the smoke clears, Hayato and Hongo jump into view completely unscathed.
“Foolish mutant!” Hongo says, pointing at the monster, “We are immune to flounder-shaped bombs!”
“Well, let’s see if you are immune to this!” Floundlabber points his other hand at the Double Riders and it launches a full-sized labrador retriever at them. The good boy runs up to the Riders and wags his tail, eager for treats.
“Aww, he’s kinda cute.” Hayato says. He pets the dog and the dog rolls onto his back because he wants belly rubs. There is nothing harmful about this dog, but Floundlabber is right. The Riders are not immune. Hongo pets the dog too. Taki is back and pets the dog too. Goro is still paddling.
Floundlabber cackles and decides now is the best time to initiate his plan Operation: M which is a large scale plan to push Earth into a massive microwave Destron was building.
“We won’t let you succeed!” Hayato says once he is finished petting the good boy.
The Double Riders then proceed to jump very high in the air, turning into miniatures halfway up. They then get into kicking poses and descend.
“Double Rider Kiiiiiick!” they call, kicking Floundlabber hard in the chest.
Floundlabber flies back and lands in range of Goro’s paddleball. He is whacked around 50 times in rapid succession which amplifies the power of the Double Rider Kick and launches Floundlabber into the massive Destron microwave. The door shuts and a 30 second timer begins.
Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Bing!
And then the microwave explodes along with Floundlabber.
“We did it!” Hayato cheers.
“Good job, Riders!” says Taki, running up with the good boy who they named Good Boy.
Goro is still paddling.
“Too bad you had to fight a monster on your birthday,” says Hongo, “But you’re a good guy for setting that occasion aside to fight for justice and the good of humanity.”
“Okay, but can I keep the dog?” asks Hayato.
They all nod and Taki hands Good Boy’s leash over to him. Then they notice Good Boy has something in his mouth.
It is a present!
Hayato takes the present and opens it to find a brand new camera.
“Woah!” says Hayato, “It’s what I’ve always wanted!”
They all share a laugh and go back to the racing club where Tachibana was forced to throw Hayato a party with cake and a charcuterie board and it was the best birthday Hayato had next to the one where he fought a toad monster.
And Goro was still paddling.