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Suga was drunk, and he blamed Nishinoya and Tanaka completely. He had just wanted a quiet birthday party, no fuss, just a few friends, and what had they done? Turned up with half the city and more booze than Suga had ever seen in one place.
Although if he was being completely honest, they hadn't exactly forced him to drink…how many cans of beer had it been now? Suga had lost count.
He just about heard the doorbell ring over the thumping dance music. He prayed that he wasn't going to find the police on his doorstep.
He stumbled over empty cans of bear and wasted teenagers to get to the door. When he opened it at last, Suga blinked in surprise at a young man wearing not police uniform, but that of one of the local pizza places.
Suga blearily took in the pile of pizza boxes in the man’s arms, before moving his eyes to the guy’s face. And what a face. Suga could have cried. One more can of beer and he probably would have.
Hot pizza guy raised an eyebrow.
“Wild party.”
“Uh…” Suga swayed on his feet a little. “…pizza man?”
“Uh, yeah. You ordered pizza, didn't you?” Hot Pizza Guy frowned.
“Did I? Why did I do that?” Suga frowned in puzzlement. It was… what, two am? Why would he get pizza at two am? Although with this much alcohol in his blood, Suga wouldn't have put it past himself to order pizza and then forget he'd done it.
Hot Pizza Guy looked as though he was trying not to laugh. “I dunno man, do you want them or not?”
Suga considered. Pizza? Or no pizza? It was an easy choice. When pizza came knocking, whether expected or not, you didn’t turn it down.
“Yeah… yeah, come in and I'll get some…uh, some money…”
Suga stumbled inside and headed for the kitchen, which was thankfully a lot quieter than the living room. Through the doorway he could see two first-years he vaguely recognised from the university. They seemed to be challenging each other to a really intense drinking competition.
Suga fumbled through some drawers before finding his wallet. Ignoring the ominous yells of “Chug! Chug!” and “Keep it down, ginger!” from the next room, he handed Hot Pizza Guy a few notes without bothering to count.
“Uh, sorry about…" Suga gestured vaguely around the kitchen, which looked as though it had survived a hurricane.
“Don't worry about it.” Pizza guy grinned. “I figured it must have been a party, considering what a weird order it was…”
Suga decided he would investigate what “weird order” meant later.
“…We get a few parties ordering around this time. I've seen a lot worse, trust me.”
“Oh?” Suga tried to pay attention, but his alcohol-addled brain seemed intent on staring into Pizza Guy’s eyes. He took no small delight in noting that they were a deep and irritatingly attractive brown.
“…so the door opens, at last, and the guy just vomits straight onto my shoes!” He trailed off, blushing. “Uh, sorry, you don’t want to hear about that!”
“Oh… no! Don't worry about it!” Suga blushed as well, praying that he wasn't being as obvious as he suspected he was.
“Uh…” Hot Pizza Guy's eyes fell to the floor. “I guess I should be going…”
“Aw no! You should stay.” Suga grinned, inwardly cursing because God he really was being that obvious.
“Oh! Ah, I'd love too, but my manager would have my neck…”
“Oh, yeah, sure! But let me show you out, at least.” Suga lead him back out to the door, blushing to himself. Even drunk, he wouldn't let his manners slip. “Wait!” He shouted, spinning around on the doorstep. “I forgot your tip, let me go in and get something…”
“Don't worry about it, seriously. I really should be going…” Hot Pizza Guy blushed again.
“No! I insist. You can’t not leave without a tip… I mean, leave not without a t…” Suga cursed his useless tongue.
Hot Pizza Guy chuckled. “Trust me, I'll live.”
He turned as if to leave, at which point Suga did something he suspected he would regret the next day.
Grabbing Hot Pizza Guy by the collar, he pulled him forwards into a rough, sloppy kiss. When he pulled back again, he burst into drunken giggles at the shock on his face.
“There! Tip.” Suga laughed.
“Ah!” Hot Pizza Guy stuttered, doing a great impression of a tomato. “Th-thanks. Uh, I didn't get your name?”
“Suga. Like, the sweet stuff. That’s me.” He chuckled again. “Goodnight, Hot Pizza Guy!”
Did I just call him Hot Pizza Guy? Out loud? To his face?
Suga decided that was a question he could contemplate during tomorrow’s hangover.
He heard a loud crash from inside, followed by what sounded like a roar of victory.
“TAKE THAT, DUMBASS HINATA!”
“NO! AGAIN, STUPID-FACE KAGEYAMA!”
Suga decided it was probably time to intervene in whatever chaos was unfolding under his roof. He turned to wave at Hot Pizza Guy, who was still standing blushing in his driveway, before dashing inside.
***
“Nishinoya.” Groaned an exhausted Suga at eleven am the next day. “Why doesn’t this pizza have any sauce or anything on it?”
The shorter boy, who was ruffling his already-messy hair and groaning, joined Suga at the kitchen counter. Upon seeing the pizza, he collapsed with laughter, bending over to clutch at his stomach.
“Oh man! I forgot we ordered those! RYU!” He yelled the last word out into the corridor, where a distant groaning could be heard.
“Nishinoya! Hangover! Not good combined with shouting!” Suga’s protests were lost as Tanaka stumbled into the room.
“What?” He mumbled, his eyes red and, for some reason, decorated with smudged eyeliner.
“I ordered it!”
“Ordered what?” Tanaka glanced at the pizza box, containing what looked like just a dough base with a few lumps of meat scattered across it. His eyes lit up.
“NONE PIZZA!” Yelled Nishinoya.
“NO WAY!”
“WITH LEFT BEEF!”
“NO WAY!”
The pair of them dissolved into laughter. Suga clutched at his head. He did this partly because of the noise, and partly because he had six boxes of cold and inedible pizza dough to dispose of. He didn't even want to know what the pair were talking about. It was way too early for that.
That was when Hot Pizza Guy sprung into Suga’s head, and he was groaning all over again.
Had he actually kissed him? God, that was embarrassing.
“If you two don't stop making such a racket” Suga interrupted, rubbing his head. “I will force-feed you every last one of these non-freaking-pizzas, beef and all. Now get off the floor and help me clear up this mess.”
The pair, freezing under Suga’s glare, complied.
***
Suga spent his morning returning his house to something close to order. Kicking out the last of the stragglers (he found the drinking-competition boys snoring on top of each other behind his couch) came first. This was followed by clearing up the rubbish left in the party's wake. But after this he was at last left to his thoughts.
It was already late in the afternoon, but his head was still killing him, and he didn't feel like going to class at all. Instead he curled up on his couch with a mug of steaming coffee. It was only a few seconds before his grey cat Salt joined him, jumping onto his lap. Still angry about the chaos of the night before, she glared accusingly at Suga as she pointedly sharpened her claws on his jeans.
Suga jerked, spilling coffee over his lap (thankfully missing Salt) and swearing loudly.
Tipping Salt off his lap – who was looking as far from sorry as possible – Suga stumbled into the kitchen, muttering to himself.
He was wiping himself off with paper towels when he caught sight of the pizza boxes sticking out of his overflowing bin.
Hot Pizza Guy’s face swam before Suga’s eyes, looking adorably flushed and embarrassed. Suga groaned. Had he really been that cute, or had Suga just been seriously drunk?
No. There was no way anybody was that cute.
Yet the stranger’s face stuck in Suga’s mind for the rest of the day, and well into the evening. It was infuriating.
He had to know.
At 10pm he broke.
“Nishinoya?”
“Heeeeeeey Suga! Are we having another party? Great, I'll get Tanaka.”
“No we are not! We literally had one yesterday, how are you so full of energy?”
“Is that really what you phoned me to ask Suga? Because it’s a combination of Red Bull and natural chirpiness, if you're that interested.”
“That’s great, but I was actually wondering if you could remember where you ordered that pizza from last night.”
There was a loud snort from the phone. “Oh my God, none pizza…”
Suga rolled his eyes and waited for Nishinoya to collect himself.
“Nah man, I don’t even remember ordering it! Sorry! It was probably one of the local ones though. Why, did you try some and enjoy it?”
“Nishinoya, you literally ordered dough with chunks of meat. Why would I eat that?”
“Aah, but human minds work in mysterious ways. Speaking of which, do you know anything about makeup removal? Because Tanaka’s tried everything but he still can't get that eyeliner to come off-“
Suga hung up.
***
After sitting and scratching his head for nearly an hour, Suga decided that there was really only one thing for it. He would just try ordering pizza from the three local places in the hope that Hot Pizza Guy was on shift. It was a pretty wild stab in the dark, but it was the best plan Suga could come up with.
“It’s not as though I’m obsessed with him or anything.” Suga told Salt, who was watching him judgingly from the kitchen table (which she knew damn well she wasn't meant to sit on). “I just… his face. It was so pretty. You wouldn’t understand.”
Salt blinked at him.
“Ok, maybe it’s a little stalker-y. But only a tiny bit. But I really should apologise, for, you know, snogging him…”
Salt began licking her paw.
“Oh, don’t give me that! I know damn well about you and the tabby next door. Don’t think you can keep secrets from me, young lady. Stop judging.”
Salt didn’t react.
“Yeah. I know. If he does, by some miracle, turn up… I am going to make such an idiot of myself.” Suga picked up the phone. “But hey, what else is new?”
Salt stretched before rolling onto her side to take a nap, while Suga began ordering his three pizzas.
***
Karasuno Pizza
Nekoma Take-away
Amazing Oikawa’s Awesome Pizza Place
It had to be one of them.
Suga had been strongly tempted, as he ordered from each place, to ask them to send the “hot delivery guy”. His better judgement took over at the last minute- there were simply some depths he wasn't quite prepared to sink to. Yet.
He sat for a few minutes twiddling his fingers and trying to think of what he would say if Hot Pizza Guy did show up. Sorry for snogging you while I was drunk? But also now I’m sober, could I do it again?
Suga shook his head. He was being an idiot, and for someone he had only talked to for five minutes, this crush was way too strong. If this went wrong, Suga would never eat another pizza again.
The doorbell went, shaking Suga out of his trance. He jumped up and headed for the door, trying to swallow his nerves.
It was only when he opened the door that he noticed his mistake.
He should have realised that ordering three pizzas in one go would mean the possibility of more than one arriving at once. Which meant a very awkward conversation involving the two biggest rivals of the pizza business on this side of town.
Hot Pizza Guy was there, for better or worse. His black and orange uniform, Suga now noted, read “Karasuno Pizza”. The next thing Suga noticed was the glare he was shooting at at Nekoma Takeaway's delivery man, who was sporting black and red uniform, some impressive bed-hair and a shit-eating grin.
Suga had completely forgotten that these two companies were the Montague and Capulet of the city's pizza war.
Bed-hair man shook his fringe out of his eyes before locking eyes with Hot Pizza Guy.
“Don’t you dare.” Began Hot Pizza Guy.
“WHY CAN’T WE BE FRIENDS? WHY CAN'T WE BE FRIENDS-“ Sang Bed-hair, loudly and surprisingly tunefully.
“Every time, man! Every time you see me! It wasn't even funny the first time!” Hot Pizza Guy hollered over the singing.
That was when the delivery man for Amazing Oikawa’s Awesome Pizza Place came around the corner and promptly lost his shit at them.
A few minutes of chaos and pizza-related death threats followed, not helped by Oikawa’s delivery man, who turned out to be equal only to Salt in troublemaking. Suga tried and failed to stammer out any kind of explanation that didn't make him sound like a stalker or a psychopath.
He paid the two that weren't Hot Delivery Guy hurriedly, managing to get bed-head to stop singing only with the bribe of an extra-large tip. Once they had both left (one throwing a wink over his shoulder at Suga, as if he had somehow guessed what was going on) it was at last Hot Pizza Guy and Suga alone on the doorstep.
“You didn’t order from anywhere else, did you? Just so I’m ready in case five more of our rivals are going to come around the corner.”
“Uh…n-no…” Suga groaned. “I’m sorry about that. I didn't really plan for you all to arrive at once…”
“Then what exacty did you plan? Because aside from World War Pizza I've really no clue what you're trying to achieve…”
“Uh…” Suga swallowed. Time to come clean. “Well, I’m guessing you noticed I was pretty drunk last night…”
“Just a bit, yeah.” He looked as though he was trying not to smirk.
“Well, uh, I was too drunk to remember what place you were delivering from. It doesn't say on the pizza boxes, but I knew it was one of the locals, so I thought I would phone each place on the off-chance…”
Hot Pizza Guy frowned. “Off-chance of what?”
“Uh…” Suga looked at the floor, hoping to hide his reddening cheeks. “Seeing you.”
“Uh…what?”
“Well, uh, I realise I was pretty drunk, and I made a total idiot of myself, and you probably thought I was mad… but I kinda spent a lot of time today thinking about y-you and… uh, could we maybe um…” Suga cringed. “Go on a date sometime? Sober me is a lot more appropriate than drunk me, I swear. Although it would really help if you told me your name, because if I end up accidently calling you Hot Pizza Guy again I'll probably cry.”
A grin spread over his face. “Well, coming from a guy who may have written his number on the inside of your pizza box…” He went red. “A date sounds pretty awesome. Are you free now?”
“Y-yeah! And I also have an insane amount of pizza that I'll need some help eating, coincidently enough…but won’t you get in trouble at work?”
“Uh…it was the end of my shift. But I saw an order come in from your address. Which I totally didn’t memorize. But yeah, I said I’d take it… my name’s Daichi, by the way.”
Suga smiled. “Daichi… would you like to come in and eat an unholy amount of Pizza with me?”
He smiled back, and yes, his face was exactly as adorable as drunk Suga had remembered.
“Can't think of anything better.”
***
Salt, as a rule, hated everyone. So watching her purring contentedly on Daichi’s lap as he rubbed the top of her head was, in Suga’s eyes, nothing short of a miracle.
“I never want to look at another pizza again.” Daichi groaned, glancing at one of the empty boxes.
“Then I'm afraid you've made something of an unfortunate career choice.” Suga grinned, bringing his feet up onto the couch and pushing his cold toes under Daichi with a grin.
“Ah, it’s just to get me through Uni. I’m a vet medicine major by day. By night, Hot Pizza Guy extraordinaire.”
Suga groaned. “Don't mention that name.”
“Anyway, I guess I just have a way with animals.” Salt purred a little louder in agreement. “Speaking of which, when’s she due?”
“What?” Suga leaned his head against the side of the couch, only half paying attention.
“Salt. She feels pretty heavy to me. When does her vet say her kittens are due?”
“What?!” Suga looked from Daichi to salt, open mouthed. “Salt! You and the Tabby next door! You- you-!”
Salt purred loudly, wearing an expression that said deal with it.
Suga groaned. He'd been groaning a lot lately.
“Well if it makes you feel better I know an excellent vet student who would be happy to come by a lot to check up on her.”
“Oh? Who would that be?” Asked Suga, wriggling up until his face was alongside Daichi’s. He began to stroke Salt as well, letting their hands brush against each other in her fur.
“Only the hottest delivery man of the best pizza place in town!”
“Actually” Suga smirked. “Nekoma’s pizza tasted way better.” Suga burst out laughing at Daichi’s crestfallen face.
“Oh, you are way more evil than you look. I bet it’s actually Salt that’s the sweet one in this house. You've definitely gotten your names mixed up. I’m going to need a really good tip to forgive you for this insult.”
“Fair enough.” Before Suga could talk himself out of it, he leaned in, kissing Daichi softly. The other gasped slightly, bringing his hands up to cup Suga’s face. Their lips slid slowly against each other. Daichi deepened the kiss, and before Suga knew it he was tasting Daichi’s tongue stroking against his. Suga smiled into the kiss, letting his body slide sideways, pressing up against Daichi’s. His hands came up to Daichi's head, tangling in the other’s hair.
They were eventually interrupted by Salt, who, angry at being ignored, sunk her claws pointedly into Suga’s leg.
Other than an almost pizza-war, some unnecessary singing, a pregnant cat and a bleeding leg, Suga thought it was an amazing first date.