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we will rage against the dying of the light

Summary:

Throughout his life, Harry Potter has grappled with his mortality.

Notes:

okay so I kind of had an idea of Harry knowing he was going to die young and sort of just ran with it. really, that's all.

Chapter 1: the beginning

Chapter Text

When Harry Potter turned 5, strange lettering appeared on his skin. They read “Harry Potter, boy-who-lived, come to die”.

The fact that the boy was going to die (and soon) would be a shock to any 5 year old. Harry Potter, after a few days of being locked in the cupboard, decides that, if he’s going to die young (it did mention that he was still a boy), he was going to burn as brightly as possible. If he was going to die young, he was going to die great, and people would hear his name and remember what he did.


In another world, Harry Potter simply accepts that the Dursleys are his lot in life. He accepts that he’s just a freak and nobody would ever want him by the tender age of 11. In another world, he befriends a red-haired boy who felt like warmth, fudge, grass, home and a bushy, brown haired girl who would smell of books, ink, parchment, cleverness.

In this world, Harry Potter fought.

In another world, Harry Potter would stream past his classes with just barely the grade to get by. In this world, Harry fights, he yells and he screams and claws at his aunt and uncle. He studies under the small lightbulb in the cupboard under the stairs (some things aren’t worth fighting for and besides, he’s comfortable in the small room. It’s unequivocally his) and grits his teeth and claws his way to the top until he’s the star student of the school, always helpful when people ask for it (what good is greatness if one is not good?).

In another world, Harry Potter would be sullen and quiet, the neighbours would hate him, and Petunia and Vernon Dursley would be able to excuse increasingly abusive behaviour as “setting him right”. In another world, Vernon Dursley would successfully bluff that Harry Potter goes to a school for juvenile delinquents.

In this world, Harry Potter grins, he waves, he laughs, and he plays with the other kids. Sure, the other children think he’s odd, but in a harmless way. In this world, Harry Potter is loved by the residents of Little Whinging, and because of him, Little Whinging becomes greater, in its own special way. If Harry had died then, had Harry died before the Hogwarts letter and a new magical world was opened to him, he would’ve already been satisfied.

This is not to say that this Harry Potter did not have his faults. His temper was explosive, his demeanor a bit too frantic, his hair still a wild untameable mess and an instant dislike of anything that was a particular shade of green.

In another world, Harry Potter would not have known magic until he was 11 years old, and a giant of a man broke the front door of a hut in the middle of nowhere to proclaim him a wizard. In this world, Harry Potter snuck into the attic when he was 9 and found letters and a trunk, packed with pictures and books about the magical world. He kept it a secret, of course, but he knew about the wizarding world, and learnt about the quirks and steps of magic. And of course, he learnt about his parents.

In another world, Harry Potter would be starving for scraps of information about his parents. In another world, the two closest friends to both Lily and James would both die; one in a stupid, stupid set of circumstances, while the other would die to give Harry Potter a chance to strike down the Dark Lord.


In this world, Harry Potter learns of his parents through letters addressed to him from his parents. He learns of Remus Lupin, of Sirius Black, of Peter Pettigrew, of the Marauders. He learns of Severus Snape, of Alice and Frank Longbottom, of Albus Dumbledore and Minerva McGonagall. He learns of the people his parents left behind and wondered if any of them were left behind like him as well.

(When he hears of Sirius Black’s escape and finds a large black dog in Little Whinging, he smiles, and calls him Padfoot, asks him who exactly he was looking for, and asks if he can help kill the traitor. When Sirius looked at him, at the boy who was burning bright but still burning, he thought “we’re one and the same, you and I. left behind with nowhere to go but up.” and wondered if his own life had a time limit ticking.)


In another world, the Dursleys would flee, running away from the letters addressed to the too small, broken boy huddled in the cupboard under the stairs. In another world, the boy has to pretend to be a hero, to pretend to want to be great, when all he wants is to be normal, to be loved.

In this world, Harry Potter knows who he is, and what he wants. When he gets the letter, he informs his guardians that he has been accepted into a new boarding school, where he would be going from now on. In this world, Petunia Dursley is quiet because she knows exactly where Harry Potter is going, knows that the boy knows of her sister of magic (two bright, sharp-edged things, dazzling the world with what they can do; what they are willing to do to be great, to be remembered) and lets him go.

In another world, it would take a half-giant bashing down the door to finally deliver the letter. In this one, Professor Minerva McGonagall is surprised to see a letter to her in the school letter. After reading the contents, she goes to visit Albus Dumbledore and demands for Mr. Potter’s place of residence to be changed (“He sleeps in a cupboard Albus. A cupboard.”). In this world, Minerva McGonagall visits Harry Potter and takes him to Diagon Alley. In another world, Harry Potter is a shy, underfed and tiny thing. In this world, Harry burns bright, his steps a touch too fast, his eyes drinking in every single store. He moves with grace.

In another world, Harry Potter would never know what his full inheritance was, taken by the goblins as recompense for robbing the bank. In another world, Harry Potter would never be more than simply frosty with goblins. In this world, the goblins see a bright, sharp-edged boy walk confidently into the bank. They see Harry Potter burning bright, asking for a good recommendation of a book on goblin customs. They see the beginnings of a goblinfriend.

Some things, however, never change. When Harry Potter meets Draco Malfoy at Madam Malkin’s, he does not see Dudley (tempered by the changing atmosphere of Little Whinging). He sees his uncle Vernon, trying to act all high and mighty, trying to show that ‘I am better than you’. In all worlds, Harry Potter dislikes Draco Malfoy at first. Being great is never a factor of being better than anyone else.

(Draco Malfoy, however, sees a boy, burning bright, shining with potential, with the ability to be great, and thinks ‘maybe I should learn more about him’)

In another world, Harry Potter is only allowed to buy the essentials required to go to school. In another world, Harry Potter’s trunk is one of the lowest quality, and his only good clothes are school robes. In this world, Harry Potter buys a high-end trunk with expanded interiors and a featherlight charm. In this world, Harry Potter buys as many books as Professor McGonagall has the patience for (budding ravenclaw, eh? asks the shopkeeper) and buys a full wardrobe. The most important difference, however, is that while in another world, Harry Potter is excited, in this world, Harry Potter is happy.

In another world, Garrick Ollivander talks about how the Phoenix Feather of Harry Potter’s Holly and Phoenix Feather wand is a brother to the Dark Lord’s and Harry Potter is torn between disgust and self-loathing. In this world, when Garrick Ollivander brings up the subject, Harry Potter wonders what happened to the Dark Lord as a boy, if he could’ve also been great, instead of terrible.

(Garrick Ollivander saw two boys, two bright, sharp-edged things. Two boys, both destined to either be great or terrible. He wondered if the same mistakes would be made this time.)


In another world, Harry Potter would be lost in King’s Cross, and Molly Weasley would see a too-small boy in too-large clothes and decide there and then that boy is family. In another world, Harry Potter would meet Ronald (don’t call me Ronald!) Weasley and the two would go on to become lifelong friends.

In this world, Harry Potter crosses the barrier alone and finds Neville Longbottom on the train. In this world, Harry Potter remembers the letters written by his parents, of Lily’s close friend Alice and her husband Frank. He sits with Neville Longbottom.

(He learns of the fate of Frank and Alice Longbottom. He wonders, if Neville is like him, left behind where others have moved on.)

(Neville wonders if this boy, this bright, sharp-edged boy is also defined by his words as he is.)

(Neville’s words read: “Be brave for me, will you? Continue my legacy.”)

When the sorting comes, many things stay the same. Hermione Granger once again is sorted into Gryffindor after a long fight against the sorting hat. Ron Weasley is also sorted there, rather more quickly. Draco Malfoy is still sorted into Slytherin, although it takes a few moments for the hat to decide rather than as soon as the hat touches his head.

Some things, however, do not. Neville Longbottom is sorted into Hufflepuff, after a long conversation with the hat. And of course, Harry Potter himself.

In another world, Harry Potter begs for the hat to not put him into Slytherin, and perhaps after many years, he will hate himself for it. In another world, Harry Potter makes a split-second choice between a boy who was kind to him and a boy who was not. (They were all just lonely, lonely boys)

In this world, Harry Potter discusses why the hat shouldn’t put him into Slytherin. I’m already great, you see? And I want to keep being great, I don’t want to become great again somehow.

The hat deliberates for a while. I wonder… are you opposed to making other people great?

Harry Potter laughs. That’s part of being great, I think.

And then the hat cries out “HUFFLEPUFF!”


In another world, Harry Potter is considered the stereotypical Gryffindor. In another world, Harry Potter is reckless and impulsive, and rarely thinks of himself at all. He is self-sacrificing, infuriatingly noble, and wholly good according to Albus Dumbledore.

In this world, Harry Potter is anything but a stereotypical Hufflepuff. He burns bright, plays and laughs and screams like a Gryffindor, he studies and plans and researches like a Ravenclaw, he takes advantage of every resource at is disposal and is unafraid to manipulate circumstances to his advantage like a Slytherin.

Despite that, underneath, there are still the fundamental qualities of a Hufflepuff, the ones he embodies, even if no one notices. Of loyalty and fair play. Of friendship and kindness and compassion. Of being great.

(People tend to forget that in her time, Helga Hufflepuff was the most feared defender of Haugh’s Wards Castle, and the children within. People remember the kindness and compassion but forget that badgers are most vicious when enemies attack their young.)


Albus Dumbledore is rather confused. Whatever he expected from Harry Potter (a weapon, a figurehead, a martyr), he did not expect the bright, sharp-edged boy with an explosive temper and a violent tendency to protect his friends at all costs. He did not expect a leader, burning bright. Albus Dumbledore does not know how to work with another leader, for there has always only been one on both the side of Good and Evil.

(Albus Dumbledore forgets the shades of grey between pure Good and pure Evil. He forgets that he himself was once the lover of the very same Evil that he fought to protect the innocent. Albus Dumbledore may not be a bad man, but he is a man who forgets.)


In another world, most of the teachers of Hogwarts think Harry Potter is a fairly average student, except on a broom. Severus Snape thinks of Harry Potter as the second coming of James Potter, here to torture him till his death.

In this world, Harry Potter is seen as a shining star amongst the badgers. Pomona Sprout is incredibly proud, Minerva McGonagall is somewhat peeved.

Severus Snape sees the second coming of Lily when Harry Potter smiles at him. After the sorting is over, and he is securely locked in his quarters, he weeps, and mourns for Lily Evans properly for the first time. He thinks you would be proud of him Lily; I’ve only seen him for a few seconds, and I think I already am, too.

(When Harry Potter finally tells him about the letters his mother wrote to him, about a small, beaten, broken boy learning to live again, about a young man slowly twisting, becoming unrecognizable, to the other side of the war, Severus Snape weeps for himself, for the boy he was, playing at the war of two old men.)


When Harry Potter accidentally encounters the Cerberus in the forbidden corridor, he immediately tells all his Hufflepuff housemates about it. Susan Bones mentioned it to her Aunt Amelia in a letter the next day.

The day after that, Amelia Bones barged in through the front doors during breakfast, with a whole squadron of Aurors behind her. “ALBUS PERCIVAL WULFRIC BRIAN DUMBLEDORE!” she screamed “YOU DARE TO PUT OUR CHILDREN AT RISK FOR NO REASON AT ALL! WE WILL BE REMOVING WHATEVER THE HELL YOU HAVE PUT UP IN THE THIRD FLOOR CORRIDOR AND BY MERLIN IF YOU TRY AND STOP US, I WILL ARREST YOU ON THE SPOT!”

Susan Bones thought it was terribly impressive. Harry Potter was busy cracking up with his best friend Neville Longbottom.


When Harry Potter gets the highest marks in the whole school in the exams before the Christmas Holidays, everyone is surprised for a moment before thinking well, that’s Harry Potter, of course he’s the top student.

Hermione Granger however, seeing how hard Harry Potter was working, between talking to his friends, studying like his life depended on it, resolved to study why Harry Potter was the best.

Neville Longbottom was in awe of his friend, and idly wondered if the person who would ask him to carry their legacy would be as great as him before shaking it off and going back to talking about normal things.

Susan Bones, however, noticed things that most other people did not, as did her best friend Hannah Abbott. They noticed how frantic Harry Potter seemed to be sometimes, how he always had a smile for everyone, how when he joked about being great, there was a sense of desperation in his face. They wondered when Harry Potter would burn out, and if he did, would anyone be there for him? They wondered once, quite morbidly, if anyone would come to the funeral of Harry Potter.

Draco Malfoy wondered, quite rightly, if it was really worth it to continue antagonizing Harry Potter and lose a valuable ally (and though he would not admit it until the bitter end, a good friend).

Harry Potter himself, however, was winding down slightly. He didn’t quite relax (he’d relax when he was dead), but he slowed down somewhat, trying to enjoy the few days where he didn’t quite need to study as much. He wondered how life would be if he didn’t have such a short time limit.


In another world, Harry Potter stays at Hogwarts with Ronald Weasley, and experiences his first Christmas where he is sure that he is loved. In another world, Harry Potter is gifted the invisibility cloak, and finds the mirror of Erised, he finds out what he wants the most is a family, his parents. Each day after that, he wonders what if.

In this world, Harry Potter goes home to warm Little Whinging. He knows he is loved, by his friends both in Hogwarts and here. He makes sure to speak to them all, to say hi to each and every one of his neighbours. He still receives the invisibility cloak, but he gives that to Dudley Dursley (I can probably make myself invisible with magic Duds, you should keep that).

In another world, Harry Potter would wake up in Gryffindor Tower, and would be stunned with surprise that anyone would buy him gifts. In this world, he goes out of his way to buy every single one of his acquaintances a gift. He buys Neville a wand holster, he buys Susan a book about warding, he buys Professor Snape a book on lab equipment and safety. He buys, as always, a custom-made pin with a stag, a dog, a wolf and a mouse for one Remus Lupin; even if no one else was left, Harry Potter wanted to re-assure the man that he was not alone.

(Remus Lupin wondered who was sending him the pins, but he was grateful nevertheless, and he never left his home before putting one on. It was a reminder to him, that no matter what, someone out there still remembered that he existed.)


Dudley Dursley often wondered when his cousin would die. It was something Harry Potter had told him and only him a long time ago (“we’re brothers Duds, I won’t let you become your father” he had said, and those were his marks). It seemed like he was still alive and kicking, but every single time he left for that magic school, Dudley Dursley worried that he would not come back.

Dudley Dursley, however, was quite happy that he’d found a brother at school as well

(“and next time, I’ll ask if he can visit, and I’ll introduce both of you! that way neither of you will be lonely when I’m gone”

“have you told him then?”

“not yet, no, I’ll tell him at the end of this year.”)

It was odd, Dudley thought, to think of his cousin, his brother as someone who was going to disappear. His brother, who had already accepted his death, and decided to fight and claw and burn despite that. His brother, who was already making contingency plans about his death while only 11 years old.

He thought his brother was terribly brave.


When Harry Potter returned to Hogwarts, Neville Longbottom asked as to how his holiday went. In response, Neville learnt more about Harry’s brother (“not by birth, but might as well have been”) than he’d have ever figured there was. He learnt about the shadowy presence in the back of his stories, always a solid figure to pick him up if he’d fallen down. Someone who he’d shine for no matter what. Someone who inspired him to be great. Neville wondered if he’d be worthy of even seeing this great person at all

Susan Bones, and by extension, Hannah Abbott heard about Harry Potter’s brother as well. They wondered how any person had earned so much trust from Harry Potter himself.

(Dudley Dursley became a myth of Hogwarts, a legend who raised the greatest of heroes: Harry Potter himself. Supposedly, he’d survived the killing curse too. After hearing this, Dudley Dursley wondered if Harry Potter would have been happy being remembered as that.)


The year ended uneventfully. This, for Albus Dumbledore, was quite odd, considering his defense teacher was still here and nothing terribly inconvenient (or just plain terrible) had happened to him.

When Albus Dumbledore went to talk to the defense for his second year, however (the first teacher to survive to continue teaching a new term since Professor Merrythought retired all those years ago, it was quite an honor, he mused) he found the dead body of Professor Quirrell slumped over his desk, as if he fell asleep. Albus Dumbledore rushed him to St. Mungo’s and wondered what went wrong this time.

(Harry’s only normal year had come to an end. There is something to be mourned there, even for the boy who had already accepted his own death as necessary. It is quite a sad thing, for something to be so horribly sad, yet no one knew it even was as such.)

 

Chapter 2: the heir and the chamber

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

In another world, Harry Potter would be dreading the journey home, and would spend the day cleaning up his room, and being generally morose and quieter than usual. In another world, the three friends who had just been on an adventure to save the Philosopher’s Stone would part ways and be happy that they, at the very least, had each other. In another world, despite this, Harry Potter would still be so very alone afterwards.

In this world, Harry Potter was seen as the brightest spark in the galaxy of stars that was Hogwarts. In this world, Harry Potter was fast friends with Neville Longbottom, Susan Bones and the rest of Hufflepuff house. Most importantly, in this world, Harry Potter had a brother waiting to welcome him home, and a neighbourhood that was warm and welcoming.

In another world, Draco Malfoy may have heard something of his father’s plans, but he would not have done anything about it. In another world, Draco Malfoy grew into a blood purist until he realized exactly what kind of person the Lord Voldemort had become.

In this world, Draco Malfoy was still trying to ally himself with Harry Potter. If he overheard his father’s plans, he would immediately send a letter via Dobby to warn Harry Potter about the things being planned. In this world, Harry Potter decided that Draco Malfoy, while he may be pompous and enjoyed grandstanding, was not a bad person.

(Later he wondered what any of them would have been if Harry Potter had been a typical Gryffindor. He would’ve wondered if any of them would be as strong as they were now.)


In another world, Harry Potter was locked in his room with next to no food and only his owl to keep him company. In another world, a house-elf blocked all the letters that were trying to reach him. In this world, Harry Potter kept a constant correspondence with his self-proclaimed brother: Neville Longbottom. He kept in touch with all of his new Hufflepuff friends, of his allies in Slytherin, of his acquaintances in Ravenclaw and Gryffindor. In this world, Harry Potter was allowed to go outside, to meet his muggle friends and neighbours. Harry Potter kept fighting for the tiny corner of home that he had built, that he had fought for, that he had made great.

On Harry Potter’s birthday, quite a few owls arrived with gifts. Neville Longbottom had got him a book on actual divination methods to predict and anticipate the future, Susan Bones and Hannah Abbott had pooled together some money and got him an Auror training manual. The rest of the Hufflepuffs (he wasn’t quite as close to them, but they were still his housemates and friends) had got him less personal, but still quite meaningful gifts.

Harry Potter’s muggle friends, however, had gotten together with Dudley Dursley and thrown a party for his 12th birthday. Dudley Dursley was happy to see that the frenzied look he generally saw on his brother’s face was finally gone, if only for a few hours.

(In Harry Potter’s absence, Dudley Dursley stepped up to keep Little Whinging warm and happy. He wasn’t bright and sharp and cheerful like Harry Potter, but everyone in the neighbourhood appreciated it regardless.)


Some things, however, happen in all worlds. A fist fight still breaks out between Arther Weasley and Lucius Malfoy. The Diary is still dropped into a young Ginerva Weasley’s cauldron. This time, however, there is no Harry Potter in sight (he had gotten his books and things a long while ahead of schedule).

Ginny Weasley still writes in the Diary, the shade of Tom Riddle still writes back. This is the same in all worlds. Tom Riddle hears the stories of Harry Potter, of the Boy-Who-Lived, he hears of how Harry Potter was the highest scoring student in his entire year and thinks threat.

(He does not hear about him being in Hufflepuff. If he did, he would have never classed him as a threat. This would have been a mistake.)


Before Harry Potter returned to Hogwarts, he had already spread the warning around. In fact, the only people who were unaware that Lucius Malfoy was up to something were a few oblivious Gryffindors and a few isolated Ravenclaws who usually lived in their own world.

In another world, Harry Potter would fly a car to school before crashing it into the Whomping Willow. In this world, nothing that exciting occurs on the train, nor is the entrance to the platform blocked with elf magic. Dobby, in fact, was keeping an eye on people to see if someone was acting strangely.

In another world, Luna Lovegood would have been bullied endlessly until she was finally taken under the wing of Dumbledore’s Army. In another world, perhaps she would be lonely despite this, since she wasn’t particularly friendly to any of them.

In this world, Luna Lovegood was firmly under the protection of Harry Potter, who had immediately invited her to his friend group after he saw a bunch of Ravenclaws call her loony. In this world, Luna Lovegood became close friends with Neville Longbottom, with Susan Bones and Hannah Abbott, with Harry Potter and by proxy, Dudley Dursley. In this world, Luna Lovegood had lifelong friends.


Gilderoy Lockheart, in all worlds, was a fool. This was recognized quickly by nearly all students. A few older students were very concerned that his behaviour was quite inappropriate with them, but there was nothing they could do other than simply complain to their heads of houses. (A few of them woke up aching for some reason but couldn’t quite remember why they were aching. This should have concerned them more than it did.)

Harry Potter, however, decided it would be a good idea to start a study group to avoid the incompetence of Lockheart. Dumbledore’s Army, though it would never be called that in this world, was created three years ahead of schedule. Word spread that Harry Potter had an Auror’s training handbook and was allowing people to borrow it.

Susan Bones and Hannah Abbott were extremely smug about that.


Despite all the new precautions taken by the students, despite the warnings doled out by Harry Potter and his friends, and despite all intervening circumstances, something that occurs in most worlds happened here as well.

The cat was still petrified. The message was still written on the wall. The Chamber of Secrets is open. Enemies of the Heir, beware!

However, there were still changes. In this world, Draco Malfoy did not loudly crow for the death of muggleborn students. Harry Potter was not the one accused in this world; he had been in the great hall with Neville at the time. Instead, a poor first year had found it this time, squeaked, and run in the opposite direction to the nearest professor.

Tom Riddle smiled to himself inside the diary. The game had begun.


When Cedric Diggory walked out onto the Quidditch pitch, he was surprised to see Harry Potter there, trying out for the seeker. When he saw Harry Potter fly, however, all doubts were wiped from his mind about putting Harry Potter on the team. He flew like he was born in the air, with the same frantic energy that he carried nearly everywhere.

In another world, perhaps he would have been the seeker for Gryffindor earlier, in his first year. In this world however, Harry Potter is not a half-starved broken boy who was hidden away in the cupboard under the stairs. Harry Potter is the shining star of Hufflepuff, the king of Little Whinging (even if Harry Potter himself did not know it, he had won the hearts of everyone in his home. Harry Potter, who had fought and dragged Little Whinging kicking and screaming into being a warm and welcoming home for any who lived there.). In this world, Harry Potter is still small and slight, but he isn’t weakened by starvation. In this world, Harry Potter has the real potential to be a Quidditch star.

(When someone mentions it as a career, he laughs and waves them off. His more observant friends notice the tinge of sadness and resignation in his eyes. Only Neville understands why.)

In another world, perhaps Hufflepuff would never gain much recognition until an older Cedric Diggory becomes Hogwarts’ Triwizard Champion. In another world, badgers continue to be underestimated and downtrodden. In this world however, with Harry Potter in Hufflepuff, everyone is at least motivated to be better, to be greater than they are. To at least try to match up to the star of Hufflepuff. In this world, Harry Potter catches the snitch and wins a Quidditch match against Ravenclaw.


Once more, the more things change, the more surprising things stay the same. Colin Creevy is still quite the Harry Potter fan. Colin Creevy still asks him for a photo, and perhaps an autograph too. In this world, Colin Creevy is perhaps still a fan, but he is not the only fan.

(Gilderoy Lockheart sees the bright boy, sees the boy burning, shining as bright as he can, and wonders if he can squeeze the spark out of him. He wonders how the boy stays motivated.)

In this world, too, Colin Creevy is petrified next, his camera smoking and useless.


In another world, perhaps people would panic, perhaps Slytherin house would think themselves safe from the Heir’s machinations. In another world, Gilderoy Lockhart would establish a dueling club, where Harry Potter would reveal himself as a Parselmouth, and all the accusations turned towards him.

In this world, however, Harry Potter’s defense club, overseen by Professor Flitwick, would grow exponentially after the petrification. In this world, perhaps people would side-eye Draco Malfoy, despite Harry Potter vouching for him.

(“you always have to remember, sometimes the best defense is running far away, or apparating out. if you can get one, get an emergency portkey. you can’t fight everything.”)


In another world, Hermione Granger would brew Polyjuice potion for her friends and herself to find out more about the chamber. In another world, Hermione Granger, a 12 year old, would find out what the monster is before being shortly petrified.

In this world, Hermione Granger works with Ravenclaws to find out what lurks in the chamber. Perhaps they would find out about the Basilisk sooner. In this world, the students know the monster in the chamber is a basilisk. In this world, nearly all the students go home for Christmas.

(In this world, too, parents do not understand. They think ‘well, they’re children, surely there can’t be a basilisk under the school’. The children shake their heads; some of them wonder if they’re going to die this year.)

(In this world, Harry Potter wonders if this is his last year at school, if the Heir is the one who will speak those words. He burns brighter during Christmas at his home in Little Whinging. He solemnly tells them goodbye, and wonders if he’ll see any of them again.)


In this world, too, Harry Potter is a Parselmouth. In another world, he may have been the target of ire for the talent and may have never used its abilities to their fullest extent. In another world, parseltongue would still be seen as evil.

In this world, when Ginny Weasley is finally taken into the chamber, it is Harry Potter who walks into the chamber alone. Perhaps in another world, a fraudulent Gilderoy Lockhart and a frantic Ronald Weasley would accompany him into the chamber, but in this one, he walks into it alone. He thinks no one else needs to die for me.

In another world, Harry Potter is skilled in defense, perhaps to the point of a prodigy. In this world too, he has the same skills, perhaps more so due to the tips he follows in his Auror training manual. None of these skills matter when the heir says “She won’t wake.”

In both worlds, Harry Potter faces the basilisk with but a songbird and a hat. In both worlds, Fawkes appears, though in this world, it is not loyalty to the headmaster the brings the Phoenix, but loyalty to the school, to his classmates, his friends.

In another world, a broken boy puts on the hat and the hat thinks poor boy and gives him a sword. In this world, there is no pity from the hat, but a different sword falls out of the hat.

(People forget the legendary image of Helga Hufflepuff, soaked in blood, her sword glinting in the moonlight.)

In both worlds, Harry Potter kills the basilisk with just a sword. In both worlds, Harry Potter is stabbed in the arm with a basilisk fang. In another world, he would accept his death as necessary, until Fawkes cried on his arm.

In this world, Harry Potter knows he is not going to die. In this world, Harry Potter has raged, screamed, Harry Potter has fought against the death he knows is coming, but he knows it is not coming today. Fawkes still cries on the arm of Harry Potter, but this is after Harry Potter has stabbed the Diary with the basilisk fang multiple times.

In another world, Harry Potter is seen as a hero. In another world, Harry Potter is just a broken boy trying his best to act like one.

In this world, Harry Potter really is a hero.


In another world, not many people learn that Harry Potter fought a basilisk with just a sword and won. In another world, they simply know that Harry Potter stopped the Heir, somehow.

In this world, the students know what the monster was. In this world, the students know that Harry Potter faced a basilisk alone and survived. In this world, the most students look to Harry Potter with awe.

In both worlds, Dobby is freed. In both worlds, Lucius Malfoy is enraged beyond reason and is thrown out of the board of governors. In this world, however, Draco Malfoy is relieved. In this world, when Draco Malfoy goes home, he goes to his mother and cries and cries (for all his beliefs in racism and blood purity, in both worlds, Draco Malfoy is just a boy). He tells his mother of Harry Potter, of how Harry Potter faced down a basilisk alone and survived.

(Narcissa Malfoy sees the political winds shifting, sees what is to come, and prepares to protect her son.)


In this world, the whole of Hufflepuff house scolds Harry Potter for being so stupid. They say that he should have gone to a teacher, that he should have asked for help.

In private, Harry Potter explains to Neville Longbottom, to Susan Bones, to Hannah Abbott and to Luna Lovegood. He explains his words, the prediction of his death. “Either I would have died, or I wouldn’t have, but you guys don’t have to die,” he says, with maturity far beyond his years.

In private, Neville Longbottom, Susan Bones, Hannah Abbott, and Luna Lovegood, all mourn that Harry Potter is going to die, and nothing can really stop that. All of them mourn for the star of Hufflepuff, the Quidditch prodigy, the top student of the school, the bright, sharp-edged boy that is their friend, their family is going to die, and they wonder if (when) he does, if the hole he occupies would ever be filled.


When Tom Riddle faced Harry Potter, he wondered what motivated him to keep burning so bright. The star of Hufflepuff, the Quidditch prodigy, they called him, and Tom Riddle wondered was I ever so great.

In his dying moments, however, he saw Harry Potter look at him with pity. Tom Riddle heard Harry Potter say, “I’m sorry for you, you could’ve been great, but you became terrible.”

Notes:

yes I know it's depressing, but I'm sort of in that mood currently

Chapter 3: interlude: fear, bravery and death

Notes:

introspection time yes

Chapter Text

Neville Longbottom wondered sometimes. He wondered how Harry Potter stayed sane, knowing he was going to die. He wondered if he would have been brave enough to face his death without flinching like Harry Potter. He wonders if Harry Potter is happy.

Neville Longbottom talked to Dudley Dursley quite often. He sometimes shares his thoughts, his fears and hopes, his feelings about one Harry Potter. Dudley Dursley seemed to have similar feelings. They wondered together if this was what brothers were like. Neville Longbottom thought it felt nice.

Neville Longbottom fears his grandmother. This would be common sense if you lived with the Dragon lady of the Wizengamot. His grandmother constantly compares Neville Longbottom to his father. Neville Longbottom wonders sometimes, if his grandmother would have been happier if he was the one in the Janus Thickney ward, rather than his father.

In another world, perhaps Neville would be quieter, more cautious, more focused on being the copy of Frank Longbottom that his grandmother wanted until the formation of Dumbledore’s Army. Until Neville has to lead the resistance of students against Professors who crucio dissident students, until he is forced to turn into a leader, the back-up boy-who-lived.

In this world, however, he has met Harry Potter. He is Harry Potter’s brother in all but blood. He has  seen Harry Potter fight for every inch of recognition to be his own. He has seen Harry Potter, who burns like a star, but only because he was going to die and decides that if anything, he will be there for his brother until the bitter end, to help him live, rather than just spiting death.


Dudley Dursley knew that terrible things happened at Hogwarts. He knew that people were being frozen. Dudley Dursley was afraid that Harry Potter would not come home yet.

In another world, Dudley Dursley would sneer and laugh at the fact that he would have to care about Harry Potter. In another world, it would take Harry Potter fighting a war and coming back home more broken and world-weary than before for Dudley Dursley to go to therapy and realize that what his parents did, what he did was abuse.

In this world, Dudley Dursley knows Harry Potter is going to die, and he is going to make sure that he does not die alone. In this world, when Harry Potter weaves a tale of a basilisk, a teenage shade of the Dark Lord, a Phoenix and a hat, of a sword, of nearly dying alone, Dudley Dursley hugs him for all he’s worth because despite the façade that Harry Potter put up, he alone knew that Harry Potter was scared, that Harry Potter was scared of dying alone, forgotten in a forgotten chamber of secrets.

In this world, Dudley Dursley tells the neighbours an edited tale of Harry Potter’s adventures, of a sociopathic serial killer and how Harry Potter was forced to face him alone. Of how Harry Potter is a hero.

(Sometimes, Harry Potter wondered what he must have done to deserve such a wonderful brother.)


Susan Bones wondered how Harry Potter must cope with the fact that he was going to die. She knew that she would have broken under the fact that her life might have such a short time limit.

In another world, it would take the death of her Aunt Amelia for Susan Bones to realize that all lives have to come to an end. In another world, Susan Bones makes a similar decision to Harry Potter, to burn brightly, to be the absolute best and accept no less, to be great and remembered, for what is left of a person after their death but the memories of those who remember them?

(In another world, many people who remembered Lily Evans-Potter would remark that Susan Bones was remarkably similar to her during her career in the Aurors.)

In this world, she makes a similar decision, but earlier. She makes a similar decision, but for different reasons. She wants to show Harry Potter that he has already made a difference. She wants to show that Harry Potter will be remembered.

(Amelia Bones wonders why her niece was suddenly so much more active in her studies, but she put it out of her mind at the moment.)


Luna Lovegood wondered what it must be like to be so aware that your life has a time limit. She knew that all lives had their logical end, but Harry Potter had the terrible curse of knowing that he was going to die young. She wondered if she had the same time limit and was simply unaware of it.

Luna Lovegood wondered if her Daddy was aware of his own time limit too. Xenophilius Lovegood was an eccentric man, but he was a man who did what he loved and wrote what he wanted. Luna Lovegood thought that being able to do what you loved was quite extraordinary, and many people were quite unhappy in being forced to do things they did not enjoy.

She wondered if Harry Potter loved living when he knew he was going to die.

(In another world, it took a war to sharpen Luna Lovegood. The cost was too great. She had no real friends, only those few acquaintances with Dumbledore’s army all those years ago. In another world, Luna Lovegood was destined to be lonely forever.)


Severus Snape wondered what had possessed Harry Potter to go into the chamber of secrets alone. Harry Potter was not a typical Hufflepuff, nor was he a bold and brash Gryffindor running headfirst into deadly situations.

Then, the next day, Severus Snape saw the faces of Harry Potter’s friends at the Hufflepuff table and wondered what must have been said between them. When he asked Harry Potter, his face turned grave, an odd expression on the boy’s face.

In another world, if Severus Snape was told that Harry Potter was going to die, he would possibly celebrate, but for his vow. In another world, Severus Snape was convinced that Harry Potter was simply James Potter reborn and did not see Lily Evans in him until he was dying. In another world, Severus Snape hated Harry Potter.

In this world, when Severus Snape was told about Harry Potter’s mark, of his upcoming death, Severus Snape nearly wept. Harry Potter simply smiled a brittle smile and spoke words that were not his mark, but would reverberate anyway.

(“remember who I was, yeah? not where I’m going to go. don’t forget about me please.)


Albus Dumbledore saw Harry Potter, the burning sharp-edged boy, the leader walk into the chamber, and wondered if he still had a weapon after all.

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