Work Text:
Oh no.
Grian's stomach churned, a sickening wave of unease washing over him as he realized what he had just done. His legs gave out, and he crashed down to his knees in the sand and stared at his hands.
There was a grimy mixture of blood, sweat and sand coating his bruised knuckles, and he balled his hands into fists before slamming them into the ground before him, one after another.
I don't feel good…
He felt light headed. The sand, blurred through his tears, began to sway in front of him, and he took deep, ragged breaths as he tried to hold down the contents of the potions and the food he had consumed before the fight, during the war. After it had subsided, he stood with a groan, and turned to be met with the view of his friend's dead body.
Oh, Scar…
Grian stared. And stared, and stared and stared. He couldn't pull his gaze from what lay before him, and as he stared, he could have sworn he heard what sounded like a whisper from Ren, despite knowing he was already dead.
"One more life to go, Grian…"
One more life to go… That's it.
Grian stumbled over to the edge of the cliff, staring up into the sky. Tears rolled down his cheeks and dripped from his chin, falling far, far below. He smiled, imagining the ghost of Scar hovering just meters behind him, and turned around to take a look.
And was met with the body.
That's it.
Grian felt his shoulders shaking with his sobs, and before he could stop himself, he spread his arms and wings out wide, closed his eyes, and leaned back, letting the ground catch him with a sickening thud.
--
"Is he having a nightmare?"
"Yeah, I'm sure- Grian, buddy, wake up."
Grian was abruptly awoken by somebody gently shaking his shoulder, and sitting up, he opened his teary eyes to be met with the concerned faces of Scar and Mumbo. A quick glance around told him that he was safe and sound within his starter base, in his bed with his sheets strewn all across the mattress. He locked eyes with Scar, and his chin trembled as the images he had dreamt up flashed through his mind.
"What are you guys doing here?" Grian asked, rubbing a teary eye. "It's the middle of the night."
The two men glanced at one another. Mumbo cleared his throat. "Truth be told, we showed up in the middle of the night to leave a little prank for you to wake up to. But when we came inside, we heard you crying and muttering in your sleep. We got a bit worried." He tilted his head, rubbing the back of his neck. "Do you want to talk about it?"
Grian broke his gaze away from Scar and tucked his legs up to his chest, wrapping his blanket tighter around his shoulders. He shivered, and told himself it was because he was cold.
It always felt so difficult to accept their help, even though his friends already knew about his struggles with nightmares, and they had known for a long time already.
Scar sat down by Grian and rubbed circles into his shoulder without saying a word, and Mumbo sat down on the other side of Grian for him to lean on.
And Grian did, letting his head crash into Mumbo's arm. Mumbo reached an arm behind him, gently petting his wings in an attempt to soothe him as he sobbed.
"Hey, look, it's okay," Mumbo said, his fingers running through the feathers of Grian's wings. "It was just a dream, you're not in that world anymore. And you'll never have to go back there again, if I have anything to say about it."
But still Grian sobbed, choking out the words God, I'm a monster under his breath. Scar hushed him.
"I'm not having any of that," Scar said, squeezing his shoulder. "I've said it many times and I'll say it again, Grian, I forgive you. For us to get out, there had to be a winner." He waited for Grian's sniffles to quiet down, and whispered, "You had to do it, and I forgive you."
Grian curled in more on himself, and gripped Mumbo's shirt. "Do I even deserve it? I could have just-"
"Just what?" Mumbo asked, interrupting him while maintaining a gentle tone. "Just let Scar kill you?"
"You know I wouldn't have been able to, Grian," Scar chipped in. He reached down and grabbed Grian's hand, squeezing it to help ground him. "Look at me, just for a moment."
When Grian turned to look at him, tears streaming down his cheeks, Scar offered a comforting smile. "We're home. We're safe. You're going to be okay, and Mumbo and I will always be here to help you through the times when you feel you're not."
"Things will get better," Mumbo kindly added, removing his hand from Grian's feathers. "We'll be here for you, okay?"
Grian tried to speak, but there was a lump in his throat, so he nodded in response, then returned to leaning his head against Mumbo's arm.
"Would you like us to stay here with you?" Mumbo asked.
He nodded again.
"Then we gladly will."
Scar released Grian's hand and left the room to grab some more blankets and pillows while Mumbo continued to sit beside Grian, continuing to run his hand down the colorful wings on his back. Grian rubbed the tears out of his eyes, and, as Scar returned minutes later, his arms full of blankets and pillows in preparation for a last minute sleepover, he could almost feel the hole in his heart stitching back together.
He was safe.
He was forgiven.
And maybe one day, he'll believe them when they say that.
---
Moonlight poured in through the open window, bathing the room in a pale glow. Grian stared out the window, up at the endless expanse of stars in the sky, and let out a deep breath, letting the cool night breeze wash over him.
His two best friends were laying on either side of him, their breathing slowed but not quite snoring yet. Grian smiled.
"Mumbo? Scar?"
"Mmh?"
"Yeah, Grian?"
"I love you guys."
"We love you too, G."
"Mhm."