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She would watch her from afar. Though, realistically speaking, she was only gazing upon her puppet. That didn't stop the Guuji from fooling herself; convinced by her own thoughts that that was her beloved, not a synthetic form.
Though, the moment the aura of that figure fell upon the atmosphere, Yae knew very well that it wasn't her lover.
And that she would never know if, and when, she would ever come back.
Still, she continued to stare intently at the puppet, most especially during her battle against a traveler from afar, a fresh threat of the Shogun's eternity.
The way those violet eyes glowed in rage, rather than love... it was something Yae still couldn't adjust to.
As time passed, Yae was bound to run into the Shogun occasionally, either to update her on the situation of the storms, or to give Yae orders on what to do with the shrine during busy days. It was eating her inside, having to see someone she thought she knew and shared love with, only to be an empty shell of her lover.
Nights alone at the Narukami Shrine in particular were near unbearable. The silence of the wind blowing from outside, and the constant reminder of the Guuji's overbearing responsibility from the Sakura Tree.
Back when times were easier, she would rest her head on Ei's chest as the two shared and eased one another's stresses.
The reminisce was enough to bring a small smile to Yae's lips, but once the realization of the present hits her, she falls back into the darkness of her thoughts. It was tiring; having to please so many people every day, while also keeping a formal yet approachable demeanor.
In order to stay focused, she would have to force every thought of Ei out of her head, and she hated it.
She didn't want to forget her the way Ei so easily did once she stepped into her Plane of Euthymia.
She wondered, are her ambitions for eternity more important than what they had?
And after the question ran through her mind, she would let out a weak laugh, her lips settling into a sad smile as she thought to herself.
How foolish of me. Of course they are.
Though while being so confident with how she could read Ei's mind, she still clenched her fist against her chest, perhaps hoping it would stop beating or because of how much it hurt her if her assumptions were true.
But there was no other explanation.
Ei left with hardly a word, and once she did, every sky turned into a cloudy one, followed by never-ending rain and thunderclaps from the divine skies.
Today was another dull, stormy day, and as these same thoughts were occupying her mind, Yae stood and gazed out the window before slowly turning her gaze down to her hand.
A ring. The one Ei gave her years prior to her disappearance. The Guuji rubbed it gently, the accessory still fitting perfectly on her left ring finger.
She let out a short scoff, her hand falling back down to her side as her fist clenched and shook helplessly.
"Perhaps this was the eternity you had in mind for us..."
A silence fell, but only for short moment before being replaced with a soft sobbing.
".. you're so unfair, Ei."