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A Sit Down with the Japan's National Team

Summary:

The Japanese Men's National Volleyball team get interviewed for the Tokyo 2020 Olympics and they answer some questions and play a few games

Hilarity ensues

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

The camera was rolling for ten minutes before the interviewer could get the grown men to sit down and stop bickering amongst themselves. Once everyone had finally settled down -with a lot death stares and pointing coming from Kuroo- the team seemed to remember that they were here to be interviewed.

"Hi everybody thank you for taking the chance to sit down with me, my name is Fumi Enega here with the 2020 Japanese Men's Volleyball Team, so if you guys could just introduce yourselves and your positions for our viewers at home that would be great!"

The camera panned over to the six squirming men and paused for a second before Miya Atsumu spoke up.

"Hi guys my name is Miya Atsumu and I'm the best setter on this overly large couch" this earned him a sharp jab in the ribs from Kageyama.

"Don't listen to him I am Kageyama Tobio the other setter for the National team" Kageyama turned and ruffled the hair of the ginger sitting next to him "and this is Hinata Shoyo or a you Brazilians might call him Ninja Shoyo". Hinata swatted Kageyama's hand away.

"You didn't even introduce me properly boke, but yes I am Hinata Shoyo, I'm an outside hitter, who's next? Bokuto you go next."

"Hey hey hey I'm Bokuto Kotaro and I am also an outside hitter". Atsumu poked Sakusa in the back of the head "Your turn Omi-Omi"

"Would you give it a rest with that ridiculous nickname."

"I say it with affection Omi."

"Affection my ass, wait are we allowed to swear here?"

"Yeah no, no swearing here children will be watching this program" Enega pipped up.

"Shit, wait no crap sorry" Sakusa just slapped a hand over his mouth and aggressively motioned to Ushijima to go instead of him.

"Well then I am Ushijima Wakatoshi and I am also an outside hitter and the Captain, my swearing companion here is Kiyoomi Sakusa who is also an outside hitter".

"Well if that's everybody, I was hoping we could ask a few fan questions and then maybe play a game at the end, is that cool with everyone?" Enega politely asked.

"That sounds wonderful" Ushijima replied while reaching back to smack Kageyama and Hinata who were busy having an aggressive thumb war.

"Okay then, first question from @Jackadlerssimp is who is the most fun person on the team?"

Hinata was the first to respond "That's kind of difficult, there's Atsumu kind of fun which is just getting into situations you aren't supposed to and then there is Bokuto fun which is just laughter at all times".

"I'd say Bokuto, his energy is just infectious" Kageyama spoke up.

"My votes on Atsumu, sorry Bokuto but sometimes your just to loud" Sakusa pointed at Atsumu.

"Omi-Omi I never knew you cared" Atsumu clutched his chest like he'd seen a ghost.

"Shut up jack-" Kiyoomi received a look from Ushijima "butt, yeah you jackbutt."

Bokuto was desperately trying to smother his laughter "I vote for myself, I think I'm hilarious."

"I'm voting for Bokuto as well, only because whenever you guys are enjoying Atsumu's brand of fun I'm being berated by Iwaizumi for not paying closer attention to you" Ushijima stared directly into the camera "Its like herding cats."

"Well if Bokuto can vote for himself then I'm voting for myself. I like me too" Atsumu declared.

"I think Osamu would beg to differ," Kageyama said with a grin.

"Samu is lucky he gets free publicity from my Instagram, he knows what to say if he wants to keep that goin."

"Atsumu that’s blackmail" a very tired looking Ushijima responded.

"If we could get back to the item at hand" Enega interrupted.

"But wait who won, who did everyone say was the funniest" Bokuto refusing to let the topic die asked.

"I believe it was four to two, Kageyama, Hinata, Ushijima, and yourself against, Atsumu and Kiyoomi."

"Sweet sweet victory."

"Anyway, we have another question this time from @kiyo_omi_omi what was your favorite and least favorite high school volleyball memory?"

Ushijima went first this time "Favorite was going to Nationals for the first time with Shiratorizawa, and least favorite has to be loosing to Karasuno in my third year."

Hinata and Kageyama jerked their heads around at lightning speed "REALLY?"

"We thought you didn't care that you lost to us, you were so blank-faced after the match."

"I'm not emotionless you idiots, it still hurt especially because it was my last game with Tendo, though didn't know that until after the game. Did you really not think that I cared about my last high school game?"

"I mean can you blame us, it took me two months to get you to laugh at one of my jokes once we started training together" Hinata was quick to reply.

"That's because your jokes are terrible, why do you think I didn't volunteer your name for the funniest teammate question?" Ushijima said while rolling his eyes.

"Kageyama what about you" Hinata had resolved to simply ignore Ushijima.

"Least favorite was definitely losing to Aoba Josi at Inter High, that sucked but I think maybe my favorite was beating Nekoma with you" Kuroo gets a bit of a disgruntled look from behind the camera to which Hinata stuck his tongue out at him.

"Well I know we definitely had the same least favorite memory but I think my favorite has got to be the first time you set for me."

"Aww I'm touched Sho."

"Hey it was the first time that I had a real setter set for me, it was special."

"Listen lovebirds you two can gush over each other later were kind of in the middle of something here" Atsumu grinned while poking Kageyama.

"Oh shove off Miya then what was your favorite memory" Kageyama barked back at Atsumu while shoving his hand away.

"I don't actually know what my favorite memory was probably beating you guys in my third year at Spring High, we worked our tails off for months just so we could beat you guys next time we went toe to toe, least favorite as probably losing to you guys in our second year, I just felt like I let Kita down and all I wanted was for the crowd to just tear into us but they didn't, what about you Sakusa, Bokuto?"

"My favorite was definitely the first time that I kissed Akaashi, we were on the court after the Mujinazaka game and I just felt so good after that game that I just ran up to him and kissed him, I thought he was going to push me away or tell me to get lost but he kissed me back and it was amazing" Bokuto paused blushing slightly, "least favorite was probably every time I hit one of my slumps, do you know that I forgot how to hit a cut shot in the middle of a game at Nationals?"

"Yeah I know, had to hear all about it from Akaashi at the next training camp" Kageyama smirked.

"My favorite moment was probably the day I got a Top 3 high school aces in Japan, I know a lot of people thought that I never cared about that but it was really cool, Komori got so excited and we celebrated, it felt like everything I had worked for, even if I hated it along the way, was worth it." Sakusa contemplated for a moment, everyone else on the team was watching him carefully "I think the least favorite moment was probably having to deal with Miya at Nationals Training camp, that was miserable." He finished with a shit-eating grin. Atsumu was affronted.

"Seriously Omi its almost like you don't love me anymore" Sakusa smacked Atsumu's knee.

"You know that's not true idiot."

Enega looked on the very of tears "While that was extremely adorable we do have one more thing to do before we wrap this up, I actually have a game for you guys before we let you go." And then she motioned for one of the many people behind the camera who brought out a stack of paper with pictures on the front. "Here I have a few papers with pictures of your guys' arms and I'm going to ask you guys who on the team do you think that the arm belongs to, sounds good?"

"Oh I know we'll be able to find Hinata's tiny biceps in there" Bokuto nudged Hinata good-naturedly.

"Okay so first" Enaga reveled the first paper.

Atsumu got it quickly "Sakusa, easy look at the wrist"

"Is that really what my arm looks like when I go up for a spike."

"Absolutely, you've got the limp wrist the whole time your in the air."

"And here's the next one" Enega pulled out the second paper.

"Hinata that's completely Hinata, look at how small his hand is." Kageyama proceeded to pick up Hinata's hand by the wrist and flail Hinata's hand about like it was one of those clapper toys.

"I'm sure the next one will be your scrawny arms" Hinata snatched his hand back.

At that Enaga pulled out the third paper.

"See look at that, what did I say do you see those perfect nails"

"I am proud of my nails thank you very much, they help me give you perfect sets."

Eneta showed the fourth paper.

"That's the Capn easy, see that arm that looks like it could crush a watermelon with his biceps" Bokuto pointed to Ushijima. "Ushiwaka give us a small flex why don't you."

Ushijima flexed one arm slightly, muscles rippling throughout his arm.

"Somewhere in Paris right now Tendo is shi- crapping himself" Sakusa quipped.

"Are we ready for the fifth paper" and with that Enaga pulled out the fifth paper.

"Hmmm that's either Atsumu or Bokuto, I'm going to go Atsumu, he's got those pretty setter nails," Hinata said thoughtfully as a well known expert on said pretty setter nails.

"This is Miya Atsumu" Enega smiled. "We've got one more wild card arm here since it's obvious that the next person would be Bokuto, so who do you think this arm belongs to?"

The group contemplated for a moment, eventually giving up because the arm in that shot was absolutely ripped and it clearly wasn't the coach's.

"I've got no idea, who is it" Ushijima finally spoke up.

"This is Iwaizumi Hajime, your athletic trainer."

"NO FUCKIN WAY, THAT'S ZUMI"

"NO WAY SINCE WHEN"

"ARE YOU SHITTING MY DICK"

"SOMEONES BEEN WORKING OUT SINCE JOSI"

"Guys it's not like Iwaizumi has noodle arms"

"YEAH BUT I NEVER THOUGHT THAT HE COULD KILL ME WITH HIS BICEPS"

Kuroo was having a stroke in the corner, Enega was desperately motioning to cut the camera, and Iwaizumi was at home watching the broadcast planning of throwing a volleyball at every single one of their heads.

Notes:

Inspired by a tictok by @kiiy.oomi and that one Marvel interview, you know the one I'm talking about. Thank you guys for reading, I'm still relatively new to posting so give me your constructive feedback please!

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