Chapter Text
NOVEMBER 1991
James looked in the green eyes of the woman who held his heart. Unlike so many times before, James wasn't getting lost in the green of Lily Potter's eyes but was rather observing the red rim around them and the dark bags under. He observed as tears slowly leaked out of the corners, down her cheeks before they dropped on the humid ground. Lily looked sad. No, not sad. Lily looked heartbroken.
Five days ago, the young married couple had been attacked in their family home by the worst Dark Lord in recent history. James and Lily had only managed to escape with their lives thanks to a brilliant magical ward Lily had invented. Their one-year-old son Harry had not been so lucky. As far as they could tell, Voldemort had used an unknown spell on his son that had killed him and left a mess of blood behind before he left the house.
Lily was heartbroken because she had lost her baby son. James wasn't better. He felt like a complete failure. He had failed to protect his family. He had been willing to give his life to give even the smallest chance to Lily and Harry to escape. He had confronted Voldemort, believing he wouldn't live past another sunrise, never to see his wife and son again. And he believed it was worth it, as long as Lily and Harry were safe.
The Dark Lord had attacked him and James had fought with everything he had. He hadn't lasted long but he had stood proudly as a killing curse hit his chest, believing he had traded his life for his wife and son's.
Then, he had woken up alone in a cold, dark house. He had immediately realized he was alive and thanked Lily's brilliance for inventing a ward that could diffuse the magic of a killing curse and render it into nothing more than a powerful stunner. Then, he remembered why such a ward had been necessary in the first place, and panicked. It did not help when he noticed the voices outside. Fearing Death Eaters had come for them, he immediately ran upstairs to Harry's nursery. He had felt his heart stop when he had seen Lily laying on the ground covered in blood and looking lifeless.
He had feared the worse – and justly so. He had immediately reached for Lily to see if there was a heartbeat, looking to see her chest rising and lowering as she breath – anything that indicated she was alive. When he put two fingers on her neck and found a heartbeat, he let out a sigh of relief. His wife was alive.
James might have felt relieved, but he had not calmed down. His wife was alive but he had no idea what had happened to his son. Using his wand, James woke Lily up. Immediately, Lily was in hysterics, crying Harry's name. Terror rose in his stomach. "Where is Harry? Where is Harry!? Were you holding him? Is that his blood? What happened to our son?" he tried to ask. But it was no use. Lily tried to talk but her words did not make any sense. She was inconsolable. James could only come to one conclusion.
Voldemort had used an unknown spell to kill his son and all that remained of one-year-old Harry Potter was blood.
At that moment, James had wanted to die. He had wanted to cry, to go down in hysterics like Lily had. But, he knew he couldn't. The voices he had heard earlier were louder. They had entered the house. When he heard someone climb the stairs, he knew it was time to leave. He grabbed Lily and apparated them to a small house by the English Channel. It was a house the Potters had owned for the last few centuries – a house which had last been occupied by his own parents before they died. He wasn't fond of this house as it reminded him of his father but, at that moment, his lack of love for Fleamont Potter was nowhere near his mind. All he wanted was to protect his wife, the last member of his family.
James brought the crying Lily to the master bedroom. He had barely put her on the bed when Lily jumped out of it and threw up on the ground. She immediately put her face in her bloodied hands and began crying again. Her husband helped her back in bed before he vanished the mess. Then, he cleaned the blood off her (Harry's blood, he kept remembering) and placed the covers over her.
It was then the exhaustion came crashing down. Lily had theorized it once – how it was possible surviving the killing curse would sap their energy and make them very sleepy and very hungry for the following days. He only just made it to bed before he felt his eyes close despite him. The last thing he felt before he fell asleep was his wife grabbing him as she cried in his chest.
It had been five days since the biggest tragedy of their lives and the couple had not moved on. How could they? Their son was dead!
But now, the two Potters were in the United States of America – more precisely in the State of New York at Stark Mansion, the house belonging to his mother's younger brother, his uncle Howard Stark. The reason they were there was simple.
Following the three days that had been necessary for the couple to physically recover from Voldemort's attack, James had sent letters to all three of his closest friends. He had been scared for them. The last time he had heard from any of them had been weeks before the attack. He was worried for Remus, who had joined a clan of werewolves loyal to Voldemort to spy on them. He was worried for Sirius who, from the last he had heard, had joined a group of Order of the Phoenix members that were going to raid a Death Eater stronghold. He was worried for Peter, their Secret-Keeper, who should have been staying safe in his own off the grid home to protect the Fidelius, yet the Fidelius had fallen. He had no idea what had happened to either of them so James sent them letters – to tell them what had happened to him and to come meet him at his parents' home as soon as they could.
He had tried to ignore the doubt – the fear that one of them had betrayed the others. He and Lily had known that someone close to them had been spilling secrets to Voldemort. As all of Lily's friends had ended-up being killed in the war, it only left James' friends. He hoped the next person he would see wouldn't be Voldemort himself come to finish the job because whoever had received the letter first had betrayed him.
But nobody ever came. Lily woke up later that day and James brought her up to speed. Together, they waited. And nobody showed-up. By the evening, James was forced to realize he and Lily might just have lost everyone they loved in the war. And that's when they began talking about their future.
Almost immediately, both had decided they couldn't be not together. While many other couples would have fallen apart after losing a child, it was not the case for James and Lily. If anything, it brought them closer – closer than James had even thought possible. It seemed to be the only silver lining in such a dark and horrible week.
It was also that same night where James and Lily realized they couldn't live in England any longer. Not only did they fear Voldemort was still tracking them to end the Potter family once and for all, but they simply couldn't imagine living in England without Harry.
They couldn't live in their home without imagining baby Harry playing with his toys, or flying on his toy broomstick, or throwing his vegetables away because he didn't want to eat them. They couldn't attend a Quidditch match without imagining six-year-old Harry sitting between them, staring at the players with wide eyes and babbling about how he wanted to become a professional player when he was older. They couldn't go to Diagon Alley without imagining eleven-year-old Harry running around with his friends to buy his school supplies. They couldn't go to Hogwarts Castle for business without imagining Harry walking with his friends in the corridors, attending classes, making pranks or snogging his girlfriend (or boyfriend) in a broom closet.
They couldn't imagine living in England without Harry with them. Imagining Harry constantly, knowing he was dead, only made their heartache feel ten times worse. So, they decided to move out of the country. That same night, James called his Uncle Howard and gave him an abridged version of what had happened and why they wanted to move out of England. Howard had immediately understood and told them he had one of his plane in London that could take them to America. James had hung up after a last 'thank you' and shared the news with his wife. The next morning, a Stark Industries private jet took off from Heathrow Airport, taking the last Potters out of the United Kingdom.
James and Lily arrived to Stark Mansion five hours after their arrival at John F. Kennedy International Airport in New York City. Edwin Jarvis, his uncle's butler, a good friend of the family and a fellow Englishman had been waiting for them at the airport. After passing the customs, the two Potters met with him and Edwin drove them away from the big city and deeper in the state of New York. During the ride, Edwin made small talk with them, talking about everything and nothing. He didn't say anything important but the small talk helped calm and relax the two mourning parents and make them forget about all of their trouble for a few hours. It was something James was eternally grateful for.
When they had arrived, Edwin told them he would leave them a few minutes alone while he announced their arrival to Howard and his wife Maria. James simply nodded as he and Lily quietly exited the car. They slowly began walking side by side toward the mansion.
"Are you sure it's a good idea?" suddenly asked Lily, stopping in her steps. James stopped and turned to look at her. He could tell his wife was still partially in denial about their son's death. He knew Lily wasn't sure about their plan to rebuild their lives in America because it would mean they would abandon the very small hope their son was still alive. So, he simply answered with two words.
"I do."
Lily looked down in silence. She took a trembling breath before she burst into tears. She put her face in her hands. "It's just... Why!? Why did it have to happen to us?"
James sighed sadly. He had never liked seeing his wife in tears but the tears seemed a hundred time worse since Halloween as all they did was remind him of the reason why. "I don't know, Lily. I don't know." he simply said, taking her in his arms.
Why had that happened to them? This was not something he could answer – no matter how much he wanted an answer. As horrible and retched as it sounded, he was sure there were other couples who deserved it more than them, so why had Harry been the one to lose his life?
James heard the front doors of the mansion open. Edwin was there, standing in the doorway and waving at them to get inside. He knew it was now or never. When they entered the mansion, they needed to know whether they wanted to build new lives in America or not.
"Lily, Edwin is making sign for us to come inside. It's your last chance to decide. Do you want to go with the idea or would you prefer we go back in England? Or somewhere else?" he asked.
Lily leaned away from him and looked at him in the eyes. "I- I would prefer..." she started before she closed her eyes and took a deep breath. James could hear her voice trembling. She opened her eyes and, this time, James could see determination in them. "Yes. Let's go this." she said.
James gave her a small smile, happy to see something – anything – other than sadness and heartbreak in her beautiful green eyes. "Just so you know, no matter what happen in the future, I love you, Lily Potter."
Lily smiled as well. "I love you, James." she simply stated. Then, they kissed before they continued to walk toward the mansion, holding hands.
"Hopefully, Uncle Howard will be able to help us." he said.
When they reached the entrance, Edwin opened the door wide open to let them in. "Mr. and Mrs. Stark are waiting for you in the parlour." he simply said.
"Thanks, Edwin." James simply said.
"Yes, thank you, Mr. Jarvis." added Lily.
"Just call me Edwin, Mrs. Potter."
"Then call me Lily." she said with a smile.
James smiled. He wanted to tell his wife that it was no use to tell Edwin that as he would insist addressing them formally as it was the "proper" thing to do as a butler, but decided not to. As long as Lily smiled, he would be happy.
James and Lily followed Edwin as he led them through the entrance hall toward a large room with a large fireplace and three sofas – two near the fire and one near one of the entrances of the room where his aunt's piano was residing. On one of the sofas by the fireplace sat a man with short white hair and a small moustache and a woman with greying hair and a kind face. The two were talking quietly to each other.
"Sir?" said Edwin, grabbing the attention of the older couple. "Mr. and Mrs. Potter have arrived."
"Thank you, Jarvis." said Howard Stark as he and his wife Maria raised from their seats. "Can you make some tea for our guests?"
"Of course, sir." said Edwin with a small bow. He turned and exited the parlour, leaving the Potters alone with James' aunt and uncle.
James and Lily took a few steps forward and met with the Starks. Maria immediately took the younger couple in a hug and quietly said to them "I'm so sorry for what you had to go through. I know the pain and I wouldn't wish it on anyone."
James felt tears build in the corner of his eyes. He didn't want to cry but it was just impossible whenever he was confronted with the memory of his son. When Maria released them, he noticed that his wife wasn't in a better state.
"How did you do it?" Lily asked in tears to Howard and Maria. "How did you manage to move on, to live, without your son?"
Howard sighed as he made them a sign to sit down. While Howard and Maria sat back down on their sofa, James and Lily sat down on the other one. Edwin then entered the room with a tray of teacups and biscuits. He put it on the table between the sofas and fireplace before he walked out of the room. All four of them took a cup of tea.
Howard took a small sip before he answered. "In truth, you never fully move on." he admitted with a sad look. "You will never forgot, will always think about him. You will wonder what might have been rather than what is. You can't escape it."
"Does it stop hurting?" asked James childishly. Maria shook her head before she answered.
"It never does. The pain just become less noticeable. It will lessen and you will become better at ignoring it but it will never fully vanish." she said. "Like Howard said, you will always wonder what might have been."
"How did you do it?" asked Lily quietly. "If it wasn't for James, I'm not even sure I would still be alive today." 'I wouldn't have a reason to live so I would had killed myself.' were the unspoken words everyone heard.
"You said it yourself. You have James and James has you." said Howard. "Only your other half can fully understand what you are going through as the experience of every couple is different. You have your partner – your love at your side. Rely on each other. Don't be scared of confiding to one another – of speaking to each other – of sharing everything you feel simply because you fear to put a greater burden on them. Trust the other to support you and, just like them, you will support them."
"What Howard is trying to say is that it's together you will best heal." said Maria.
Lily blinked tears. "Thank you, Mrs. Stark."
"Just Maria, my dear." said James' aunt with a sad smile.
The two couples then did small talk as they drank their tea. Ten minutes later, Howard ate a biscuit he had dipped in his cup and drank what tea remained before he cleared his throat. "Now, what do you want to do now?"
James knew his uncle wasn't asking about now now but about his and Lily's plan for the future. He glanced at his wife who looked at him and nodded. He turned back toward his uncle and answered.
"Lily and I want to build new lives in America. I was wondering if you could help us."
James stood nervously behind a slightly open door, holding one of Lily's hands in his own. Since they had decided to build new lives in America, the Potters and the Starks had thought for hours on end about their new lives. It didn't actually take them many hours to decide what identities to take. The reason it had taken so long had been a result of Howard's crazy idea.
Howard wanted James to take the identity of his dead son Anthony.
Maria had been shocked when Howard had thrown the idea but James' uncle had explained himself. He was already planning on James inheriting the company upon his death as James was as brilliant – if not more – than Howard himself. He believed that if James took on Anthony's identity, then nobody would ask questions about either James or Anthony. Because he knew that, otherwise, people would wonder why James Potter, the unknown nephew of Howard Stark was inheriting Stark Industries instead of the man's son. Making James Anthony Stark would also give him a solid cover which nobody would question. In the end, Maria was forced to admit he was right. She had then added she had always seen James as a son anyway.
The next few hours had been spent building on Anthony's identity. As far as everyone was aware, Anthony had dropped off the public's radar when he was six-year-old. The Starks never shared the fact their son was dead with anyone other than their very close friends. At first, it was simply because they hadn't wanted to be harrased by the medias about such a delicate and horrible subject. It had just been meant for a few days, but days turned into weeks and weeks into months. By that point, the Starks decided just to keep it secret.
So, in preparation for James taking Anthony Stark's identity, the two couples had built his imaginary live from the moment he was shipped to a very exclusive elementary school in England until the upcoming monthly Stark Industries press conference where Howard would announce the return of Anthony Stark from England and bring him 'back' in the public eye.
And now they were here, in the Stark Industries New York facility in a room next to the media room where press conferences were usually held. James was forced to admit to himself he was very, very nervous. He could feel his heartbeat skyrocket and sweat trickle down his face. He was wishing with everything he had that everything would be fine.
James felt a pair of lips kiss his cheek, snapping him out of his thoughts. "Relax, James." Lily – or rather Virginia Potts as she was known known – whispered in his ear. "Everything is going to be fine. Just..." She then took a breath. "I can't believe I'm about to say this but... just be the arrogant arsehole you were back in your fifth year and everything is going to be just fine."
James smiled. "Oh, and I thought you missed me, Lily-pad." he said with the same voice he used to use whenever he had tried to flirt with her back then. Lily simply rolled her eyes.
"Can't say I missed you, Potter, you arrogant twat." she joked, making both chuckle.
James' nervousness came back when the door in front of them was suddenly opened by one of Stark Industries' employees. Howard's voice came reverberating in the room.
"Now, ladies and gentlemen – Might I welcome today my son Anthony, freshly arrived from England!" he said. James took a deep breath and walked forward. "Good luck, James." whispered Lily behind him.
Almost immediately after entering the room, flashes of cameras filled his view. He tried not to let it distract him as he attempted to appear strong and confident. When he saw Howard, he simply gave a stiff nod and said "Father." in a bitter voice.
"Maria and I have been in the eye of the public a lot these past few years. For Anthony not to be seen, it would mean we barely saw him. A six-year-old child might feel abandoned, which would create resentment. When we are in public, don't appear too fond of me."
"Why? Don't you want people to believe you and your son are close?"
"I would – but it would be easier to hold your cover with this lie. If you have a hard time acting like you dislike me, just imagine Fleamont in my place. It should make it easier for you."
"You are nothing like Fleamont, though. You were there for me even when you were busy. He wasn't."
James shook his head to clear his mind of the memory before he took his place behind the podium. His heart nearly stopped when he saw how many reporters and journalists were sitting in front of him, taking pictures and asking questions. The only thing that kept him from panicking were the words Howard had told him the same day they had arrived in America. Then, he began remembering something else his uncle had said.
"Stark men are made of iron. Nothing is supposed to scare us."
"But that's rubbish!"
"I know it is, but as far as the medias are concerned, it's the truth for Stark men. You might not bear the name Stark right now, but you are one in everything that matter. When in public, you have to look strong – like nothing ever bothers you – like nothing scares you."
"Well, hello everyone!" said James cheerfully. "My, is it good to be back home! I'm sure Uncle Sam and Lady Liberty missed me as there is simply no one better than me! I, of course, wanted to stay here but a certain someone wanted me to be under the Queen's rule!"
To his side, Howard send him a glare. While the medias would probably assume it was Howard being angry that his son wasn't being respectful, James knew otherwise. Howard didn't care about how James portrayed their relationship. The worse the better in his opinion. No, Howard sent him a glare as a warning. 'You're putting it on too thick' is what he was trying to say. So, James simply gave him a nearly imperceptible nod before he continued.
"Now, I'm sure anyone has questions so we'll start with that." said James. Many hands shot in the air and James looked for who to choose.
"When I was younger, I was known to be a playboy. Some even called me a man-whore. I used to flirt with anything with a skirt. Now, I know Lily has always been the one for you – but the public will expect my son freshly out of his teenage years to be just like I was when I was younger. I'm not telling you to cheat on your wife and sleep around or to be disrespectful of women but, in some scenarios, it will be expected of you to act like the size of a woman's pair of breast is all that matter to you."
"You! With the blond hair!" said James, pointing at a woman with a large chest. The woman smiled flirtatiously.
"Evangeline Elkins for the Daily Buggle." said the woman. "Question for you, Mr. Stark. Are the rumours you attended M.I.T. at seventeen true?" she asked.
"Do you remember when you did M.I.T. classes by correspondence? Well, I knew the school wouldn't care if a British boy named James Potter wanted to do something like it and would immediately refuse you. So, I signed you up under my son's name as the Stark name hold a lot of power. I didn't think it would come in handy later but now it can be used as proof you attended the school. We don't even have to make it up or bribe someone to make false records."
"First, call me Tony." said James on the same flirtatious tone. He hated doing it as there was nobody other than Lily for him but it was necessary for his role as Anthony Stark. Or 'Tony', as he had decided to call himself. "As for your question: yes and no. I did not attend M.I.T. physically but I did take correspondence courses when I was fourteen. As I'm sure the Institute can say, I was better than my 'pears' and I passed with high grades." he said with a loop-sided grin. "Next question!"
Hands raised again. James picked a woman with a large bust once again. "Vanessa Remington for the New York Times." said the dark-skinned journalist. "What have you been doing in England since you left the media's eyes in 1976?"
James gave her a small grin – though he was already getting exhausted on the inside. "Well, attending school – when I wasn't doing other things." he said, trying to hint at a life of party and debauchery. "I was attending a very private and closed-off school though, so I doubt you heard of it. My father only know because that's where my Aunt Euphemia attended when she was younger." he simply said. And, technically it was the truth.
"Do you have a special someone in your life?" asked a third female reporter out of nowhere. James felt himself freeze. The answer he wanted to say was 'Yes, of course I do. Her name is Lily and she's waiting backstage. Want to meet her?' but that was a James Potter answer. Tony Stark wasn't supposed to be romantically involved with anyone. He was supposed to be a man-whore who didn't appear to give a shit about romance. He didn't want to lie either, so he deflected.
"Are you interested? Because I'm sure we could come to an arrangement." he said with a grin. A few reporters chuckled while Howard said "Anthony" in disappointment. (James knew he wasn't. He was sure Howard was proud for his answer, in fact).
"Only a few more questions before we are done." said Howard loudly, trying to sound like he was not amused.
A bald male reporter raised on his feet. "Simon Barronline for the Seattle Post-Intelligencer." he said. "What are your grades and how well have you done at school?"
"Wow. You sound like a family member trying to socialize with the nephew or niece they barely know." he joked. Again, a few reporters chuckled quietly. "Well, as a matter of fact, I never had a grade which was less than 80% - well unless I was hungover – so I would say I did pretty well!" James said smugly. "How about you, Miss?"
The journalist James had pointed raised on her feet. "Annabelle Williams for the Malibu Times." said the woman. "A small question for you, Mr. Stark-"
"Tony."
"-Tony." she corrected. "What can you expect from you for the future? What are your plans for Stark Industries? Will you take over the company soon or will there be a period of adaptation before you join the family business?"
"Can I say this was not one question nor a small one?" he joked, making a few chuckle again and the woman blush slightly. He was relieved, though. It was finally a question he could answer as James Potter rather than Tony Stark. "Well, I don't have plans to take over any time soon. I still have to learn how to be a C.E.O. first. Anyway, I doubt my father is getting tired. I'm sure he has a few good years left in him."
Before any other reporter could ask a question, Howard took a step forward and moved the microphone so that it would be close to him. "That's enough questions for today. This press conference is now at an end. Thank you all for attending today." he said before he began leading James out of the room.
"Goodbye, everyone." said James, waving at the crowd. He let his Tony Stark mask fall once they crossed the doors and Howard closed them. Lily immediately kissed him.
"Hey, Lils." James said. "Did I do good?"
"I think you did brilliant." said Lily. James smiled.
"Your wife is right." said Howard with a friendly tap on the back. "You did very good out there. At first, I was worried you were being too arrogant but you toned it down just to the perfect level."
"Thanks, Uncle Howard." said James.
"Now, why don't we go back home?" said Howard. "Maria must be waiting for us and we still have to invent Virginia Potts' backstory and how she came to meet you."
"You're right." said Lily. "I think I already have a few ideas."
"Oh? Do tell?" asked the older man as they began walking toward the exit.